It's Tough to Be a God

"You know, you could have started by saying you'd buy me a drink, and do the whole intimidation thing later, after you decided you didn't like what I had to say." Dean's tone was amiable as he sipped at his beer. He and Sam sat across from Hector and Teresa, who appeared to be in charge of the little band of hunters who had met them on the road. They had all taken shelter from the rain in the hotel's bar and lounge.

The place looked like a rainbow had collapsed inside. Color coated everything in a stunning mix that whispered gently to American tourists: This is a nice place. It's ok to relax. Unwind. Open your wallet. Spend all your money. There was even a stage up front, where a man with sleek black hair, a sharp suit, and a charming grin crooned popular songs with a backup chorus of tropical birds.

"Besides, I told your little spy there everything." Dean pointed across the room at Fernando, who had claimed a table for himself to sip at his cola and sort through the goodie bag Dean had handed him. With the angel-enforced truce, he wouldn't be needed any of the supplies he had picked up, and Dean figured the kid could put them to good use. The greedy look in his eyes said Fernando had a few ideas already.

"You really expect us to believe that you drove all this way for a vacation?" Hector's eyes were narrowed in suspicion. He bore a strong resemblance to his son, Fernando, but without any of the innocent charm. His arms were corded muscle, not an ounce of fat, and his knuckles bore the callouses of frequent fights. Much like Dean's.

Sam gestured to the tourists who filled the room. "There's a lot of people here who have traveled further. Like them." He pointed to small group of Asian tourists with cameras dangling from their necks, chattering away in something that sounded vaguely Chinese.

"Yes, well they never opened a gate to hell, or killed a demon, or started an apocalypse, set loose Leviathan, or unlocked a primordial evil," Teresa said. She didn't look at intimidating at Hector, but she moved with a smooth strength that spoke of years spent taking down monster bigger and stronger than herself.

"Yeah, Fernando seems to have heard some stories that don't quite get things right." Dean didn't care how impressive these hunters looked. He knew he had taken on bigger and nastier.

"Oh? You didn't do all of that?" Teresa asked.

"No, we did, but-"

"So why shouldn't we be worried when you roll into town, Mr. Winchester?" Teresa crossed her arms and waited for an answer. Her glare killed the smart-aleck remark on the tip of Dean's tongue.

"You have a very good point." Sam cut in with his familiar peacemaking tone. "It makes a lot of sense. We do tend to attract a certain kind of trouble."

Hector snorted. "You can say that again."

"But we're here on vacation. I promise that's all. There's nothing bad happening that you need to worry about."

"No hunting is the rule." Castiel joined them, tossing two room keys onto the table before he sat down in the last empty seat. Both Teresa and Hector shifted slightly at the angel's entrance. Awe? Fear? Annoyance? Who could tell?

Castiel glanced up at the singer on the stage, who had launched into an energetic rendition of "You're Welcome." "Who is that?"

"Huey," Teresa said in a tone of exasperated fondness. "You don't need to worry about him. He just likes to show off. You don't bother him, he won't bother you." Her eyes narrowed as she considered the angel.

"Something wrong with my friend?" Dean growled.

Teresa shook her head. "No, I just-I thought an angel would look different."

"Haven't you seen a few by now? I mean, a few years ago after they fell they were everywhere."

"They didn't land here," Hector said. "We pooled our resources, and Los Literatos put up a spell to keep them out. The angels only landed north of the border."

"A spell to keep angels off an entire continent?" Dean didn't even try to keep the disbelief out of his tone.

"Los Literatos?" Sam asked, stumbling over the Spanish word.

"Yes, you know. Men of Letters. They say you moved into their Kansas house."

"Yeah. Yeah we did." Sam leaned forward, an eager expression on his face. "We're legacies. Our grandfather was a Man of Letters. We didn't know there were any left. Do you work closely with them?"

"Ever since the Apocalypse," Teresa said. "It took all we had to get through that. Demons everywhere, breaking seals and wreaking havoc. It brought us together."

Dean grinned. "Hear that, Sammy? Something good came out of the Apocalypse."

"The Literatos want to meet you," Teresa continued. "They can be here in a couple of days, or meet you at your next stop."

"No." Dean's answer was swift and firm.

"No?" Sam and Teresa both said as the same time.

"Dean, of course we want to meet them!"

"The British version shot you in the leg, Sam!" Dean didn't want to think about what could have happened if Gwen hadn't been in the right place at the right time, to shoot Lady Toni. That was part of why he had been happy to take the girl out of the country. He didn't know if anyone would come looking for the body.

"Don't worry, they don't like the Brits," Hector said with a shake of his head. "Those guys are creepy. Los Literatos are different."

"Well, we're on vacation so no thanks," Dean said.

"Dean!" Sam was not giving up. "This is a great opportunity! A spell that can keep angels in one place? Something like that could be useful. No offense, Cass."

"It would be very helpful," Cass agreed. "

"The British are trying to get into your bunker in Kansas. Los Literatos could help with that," Hector offered.

Dean glared at Hector. "How did you know that?"

Hector shrugged. "Los Literatos keep an eye on the British. We were all informed when they landed. Your home is not safe."

"No, our home is fine." Dean sat back with his arms crossed. "Sammy, show them."

Sam pursed his lips, but pulled out his laptop and called up the surveillance camera feed. His expression grew tense with concern. "Um, Dean. It looks like they've moved up to C-4."

Hector and Teresa crowded around the screen to see a man in a suit affix a square of gray putty to the door, then run back and duck behind a bush. The team cowered, ears covered, as flame engulfed the bunker door. When the smoke cleared, there wasn't even a scratch on the metal structure.

Dean clapped Sam on the shoulder. "See, I told you. Nothing to worry about."

o0o

Back at the bunker…

Dean stepped back from the curly symbol he had painted on the bunker's door. It looked like a fancy F with a question mark floating above. He surveyed his work with a satisfied nod and set the paintbrush aside. "Perfect."

Cass cocked his head, squinting at the symbol. "I don't recognize this. It is no language I know. And I know every language."

"It's not a language, it's a symbol," Dean said. "It is a ward that can protect against anything."

"Such a ward does not exist," Castiel said.

"It does now." Dean cupped his hands around his mouth and called, "Mom! Gwen!" The ladies were perched on ladders at different corners of the room, copying symbols out of books to replace the wards that had been burned away by Amara. "Come here! I want to show you this."

Mary gave the symbol the same look Castiel had. "I don't recognize that." She glared at the heavy tome in her hands. "But then I don't recognize any of these."

"What's so special about this one? We don't have to know what they mean for them to work, right? Because I'm not memorizing any of this stuff." Gwen held her book away from her as if it was contaminated. "Will we be done with this soon?"

"Sure. I just want you to pay attention to this one." Dean framed the symbol with his hands. "This is a ward that can protect against anything. Angels, demons, the darkness, witches, it doesn't matter who tries to get into the place. If they aren't one of us, they won't get through."

"Nice! So then why did I spend an hour painting the rest of the walls?" Gwen gestured to the Enociah wards dotted across the room, paint still damp.

There was a pause before Dean said, "You needed the practice."

"Um, what part of 'No Hunting' did you not get?"

"Even if you don't want to hunt, you need protection. You never know what could try to get into your home." Mary's face as dark, but there was a glint of hope as her eyes settled on the symbol Dean had pointed them to. "A ward that can protect against anything?" She wasn't sure it was possible.

Dean wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "Yes." His tone was warm, certain. "Believe me on this one. Ok?"

Cass turned back to the ward with narrowed eyes. "Sometimes belief is the most important thing." He cast a sideways look at Dean, who favored him with a wink.

"I've got the cameras for outside!" Sam entered from the garage, his arms full of hardware. "I just need the right connectors. Who wants to help?"

"Apparently I need the practice." Gwen shot a glare at Dean, and then took a camera and headed outside. Mary followed.

Sam frowned at the door as they left. "Dean, is that-?"

Dean held up his finger in a shushing gesture until the ladies were gone. "Sh! Sam, don't blow it!"

"Blow what? Why did you put a tulpa on our door?"

"He said it is a ward that can protect against anything. I sense some power in it now, but there was none before." Cass put his hand against the symbol, eyes narrowed. "Interesting."

Sam raised on eyebrow and gave his brother a questioning look. "A super-ward? Dean, that's not possible. It's a tulpa."

"Exaclty. Believe in it, Sammy. Mom and Gwen do." Dean's face was lit up in a smug grin.

"That is never going to work!"

"Not with an attitude like that it won't."

o0o

"We have a ward that protects against anything," Castiel said. It was their new mantra. Every day they reviewed the footage from the bunker and asserted that the ward on the door would keep it safe.

"There's no such thing," Hector stated.

"If anyone could find one, it would be the Winchesters," Teresa muttered. "Look, the Literatos could really use a spell like that. We could use a spell like that. And the locals around here, with you in town they're a bit-"

"No!" Dean held up his hand to stop her. "We are on vacation. No hunting. No Men of Letters. They can call us after we cross the border again."

"Dean!" Sam started in again. "To meet Men of Letters would be-"

"No!" Dean pointed his finger at his brother. "You promised Gwen. No work."

"But-"

"No!"

Onstage, Huey had moved on to a new song. He tap-danced across the floor and crooned, "It's tough to be a god! To treat where mortals have not trod!

Castiel's eyes were fixed on the stage. Huey struck a pose and fireworks flew from his fingers tips as he belted out the next line. "Who am I to bridle if I'm forced to be an idol?"

Teresa tried again. "Look, there are some things about the way things work around here that you might want to know-"

"If there were a monster, spirit, or pagan god around here, we wouldn't even want to know about it." Dean's tone left no room for argument. His head bobbed in time with the music and he signaled the waitress for another beer. "That's what vacation is for!"

The singer now had a trio of songbirds hovering near his shoulders. They chimed in with the last few notes in perfect harmony. "So sign up this here god for paradise!" The birds flew high into the air, then turned into a shower of flowers that cascaded over the cheering audience.

"You wouldn't even want to know if there were a supernatural being of immense power in the same room, would you?" Cass asked.

"Nope." Dean shook his head and downed half of his next beer.

o0o

Vacation or interrogation?

There was no reason that Gwen and Mary couldn't sit back, enjoy their drinks, and watch the show like regular tourists. In the crowd, it wouldn't be hard to pretend the hunters weren't there. They only had eyes for Sam and Dean. The boys were the famous ones. The boys were the experienced hunters. The boys could handle this.

Except something was up. That much was obvious from the hunters' dramatic appearance on the road. They weren't likely to be entirely forthcoming with Sam and Dean. Play it close to the vest, keep a few bits of information to themselves. They were experienced hunters, after all, and hunters were good at lying. It came with the job description.

Could vacation include interrogation?

Gwen and Mary went to fetch themselves drinks from the bar, shared a look, and moved as one away from the hunter's table and to the back corner where Fernando had tucked himself away from the grown ups. Dean had handed him his bag of supplies with the simple instructions to 'get creative,' and it looked like Fernando was taking inventory.

Mary plunked herself down on one side, Gwen on the other, both with identical smiles. Fernando smiled back.

"My sister is in so much trouble when I get home." He sounded far too happy about this fact. With one sweep of his arm, Fernando cleared the items from the table back into their bag.

"Better her than us," Gwen said. "So, you know all about hunting and monsters and stuff? You don't seem scared of any of it." Gwen remembered nearly losing the contents of her stomach at her first sight of a demon. This kid just acted as if the end of the world and monsters were as common as tacos and tortilla chips.

Fernando shrugged. "If anything bad comes near my town, my Papi kills it. Someday he will teach me to kill them, too. But for now I just learn how to shoot the gun and spot monster tracks. And keep the gods happy."

"Gods?" Mary asked. She had heard rumors of hunters who encountered pagan gods.

"Sure. They're pretty ok most of the time, but it's not good if they get upset." Fernando gestured to the window, flecked with rain. "I hope you leave before we have a hurricane."

Mary and Gwen both turned to stare at the window for a moment. The storm clouds, the thunder, it had all happened with such convenient, dramatic timing.

"Um-we were going to stay until the weather clears so we can climb the pyramids. Wait-do you mean the gods are scared of my dad?" Most other things seemed to be, so it made a certain kind of sense. But still. Gods. "Wait-do you mean the Mayan gods are real and are still here?!" Gwen was halfway out of her seat. Her eyes swept the room as if expecting to see a stone statue come to life on the spot.

"Yeah, and they think your dad came here to kill them," Fernando said. "Wait-Dean Winchester is your dad?"

Gwen dropped back into her seat with a groan and a roll of her eyes. "No! Sam is my dad! Why does everyone always think its Dean?" A glance back at the hunters' table showed that Dean was making headway with the waitress, his hand hovering near her rear while she bent forward to show far more of her cleavage than was necessary while refilling his drink. "Never mind."

"Well, we're not here to kill anyone," Mary said firmly. "We're on vacation. We really just wanted to see the sights. Can you tell the gods that? They don't need to scare us away with a storm. We'll leave faster if the weather's great and we can get our sightseeing in." Mary didn't quite believe the words that were coming out of her mouth. Watching her dad exorcise demons was one thing, but asking gods to give them good weather? But here she was, back from the dead with both of her sons now older than her and a granddaughter headed to college. It had been a strange month.

Somehow, she had thought this vacation would help get things back to normal.

Apparently, she had thought wrong.

"Tell them yourself." Fernando pointed toward a table across the room. Its lone occupant was hunched over a glass of liquor, furtively watching the hunters' table. He had long black hair that fell in his face and a blue raincoat that fell past his knees. Every inch of him was dripping, but there was no puddle of water at his feet.

Mary grabbed Gwen's hand and squeezed hard. "Oh. My."

"Um-didn't the Mayan gods demand human sacrifices?" Gwen's knuckles were white against her skin, and her heart was suddenly hammering. "You know what? I don't think I need to see the pyramids."

"Oh, don't worry. We got rid of the bad ones a long time ago. We only kept the nice ones." Fernando raised a hand in a wide wave and called across the room. "Hey, Tlaloc! Over here!"

The dripping man flinched, startled, then deflated when he saw Fernando's grin. He snatched up his glass and shuffled toward them, eyes always fixed on the hunters' table.

"Fernando! What's going on? Do you know who your dad is talking too?" He asked in a hoarse whisper.

"Tlaloc?" Gwen knew that name. Dad had spent the first half of their day on the road reading off a list of the gods of this area. Tlaloc used to be called Chaac, and he wasn't a 'good guy.' "Didn't the Aztecs and Mayans sacrifice kids to you?"

Tlaloc's face turned down in a fierce scowl. "That was not my idea! I said I liked kids! They're nice! Fun! Good to play with! Not for eating!" He shuddered. "Kakao and Kulukan laughed so hard the first time it happened. It took a thousand years, but those assholes finally got what they had coming!"

"Tlalco is our friend." Fernando patted the dripping man's shoulder. "Come on, amigo! You know Teresa would never let anyone hurt you!"

"But-they're The Winchesters!" Tlaloc hissed. "It's what they do!"

"Actually, they're here on vacation," Mary said. "You see, those two boys are my sons and we just wanted to have some fun. Sam and Dean aren't killing anyone. They promised."

Tlaloc took a deep breath and threw a sideways glance at Fernando. "You trust these people?"

Fernando nodded.

Tlaloc blew out his breath, and the dripping slowly ceased. Outside, the rain slacked off and a ray of sun peeped through the clouds.

"Did they really come to see my temple?"

o0o

"Dad! Uncle Dean!" Gwen wove through the crowd with Fernando and a damp stranger in tow. "You will never guess who I met."

"Fernando!" Dean held his hand up for a high-five. Then he glared at the pamphlet in Gwen's hand. "Gwen, I don't care if the tour guide says its only a thousand steps. I am not climbing to the top of that pyramid. Hunters don't do cardio."

"You don't do cardio," Sam said. "And you are going to the top." He nodded to the damp man in blue. "Is this a friend of yours, Gwen?"

"No, we met to day, but-"

The lights across the room dimmed and all conversation in the room collapsed into silence. All eyes turned to the stage, where Huey stood illuminated by a single spotlight. "Alright, everybody. It's your turn!" His voice boomed over the crowd, and his grin stretched from ear to ear. "Karaoke hour is open. It's vacation, you're in the realm of the gods, and this microphone is magic! Come one, come all, and sign as you have never sung before! Who wants to start us off?"

Gwen's eyes grew wide, and she flung her hand into the air. "Here! Over here!" She grabbed hold of Sam's hand and dragged him forward. "Dad, this is gonna be great!"

Sam lurched forward, propelled by the force of her enthusiasm. "Um-I don't really-"

"I haven't heard you sing yet." Mary took Sam's other hand. "Please?"

"No!" Dean's reflexes were too slow. Gwen deposited Sam on stage and then scampered back to Dean with a pleased grin.

"Why?" Dean massaged his ear in anticipation of the pain to come.

Gwen winked. "Just wait."

Castiel shook his head. The angel didn't have much in the way musical taste, but even he knew. "This is not a good idea.

"Oh come on, I've heard Dean sing. Sam can't be that bad," Mary said.

On stage, Sam blinked dazedly in the spotlight, as if he still wasn't sure what had happened. He frowned at the microphone in his hand. Huey stepped back, picked up a guitar, and played a few introductory chords with an encouraging smile. Sam looked at the lyrics on the teleprompter. "Uh-Would you like to swing from a star? Uh-Carry moonbeams home in a jar? And be better of than you are. Or would you rather be a mule?"

As he stumbled into the lyrics his voice gained confidence. He hit each note with perfect pitch, and the sweet tones had the crowd swaying in time with the music.

"Awesome!" Gwen clapped her hands silently and turned to Dean. "You're next."

Dean's hand moved toward his belt, but there was no gun there. He had left it in the trunk. Because they were on vacation. The first day on the road, he had missed the familiar weight of it, but today he had forgotten it wasn't there. He closed his hand into a fist. There was a spear on the wall. Decoration. Probably made out of plastic. Still, it was about three steps away. Dean shifted sideways. "Ok. What's going on. Someone had better start talking, and quick!"

"Whoa!" Teresa held up her hands on a calming gesture. "It's ok! Your brother is enjoying himself."

Dean pointed at the stage and his brother, who had an oblivious smile on his face as the let the music carry him away. "That should sound like nails on chalkboard. Sam can't sing. So what is going on?" He took the last two steps sideways and snatched the spear off the wall. It was light, hollow, plastic. With a growl, he tossed it aside and grabbed a beer bottle instead.

Behind Gwen, the damp man squeaked and tried to make himself look as small as possible.

"I told you!" Tlaloc hissed at Fernando. Thunder shook the room.

"He's not a threat!" Teresa said, her hands raised between Dean and Tlaloc, not quite sure which she was speaking to.

"That's not an explanation!" Dean growled.

"Pagan gods," Castiel said. "There are at least five in the room. They have been watching us since we arrived. Except him." Cass waved to Huey, who continued to play guitar with his eyes closed while Sam sang.

Dean turned his glare on the angel. "You could have mentioned that a little sooner!"

Cass turned to his favorite human and suppressed a sigh. "You said you didn't want to know. They don't appear to be causing any trouble."

"No trouble!" Tlaloc held his hands up to show that they were empty. "No trouble here!" He placed both hands on Fernando's shoulders.

"We'd prefer if you didn't upset our gods, Dean. We all get along just fine," Teresa said. She shifted to put herself between Dean and Tlaloc. "They don't kill anyone, and sometimes they can be a big help."

"He promised us a game of soccer on the old Mayan field tomorrow." Gwen's eyes were dancing with delight. "Playing soccer with the gods! Where the game was invented!"

"I thought you didn't want anything to do with this supernatural stuff."

"I don't want to kill things." Gwen took the beer bottle out of Dean's hand. "But these guys are great. I mean-look." Gwen gestured to the stage, where Sam warbled through the last lines of the song with both hands raised in the air and a smile on his face.

"All the monkeys aren't in the zoo, every day you meet quite a few. So you see it's all up to you. You can be better than you are. You could be swinging on a star!"

The crowd burst into applause as Sam hopped off the stage, a slight blush creeping into face. Huey, aka Huehuecoyotl Mayan god of song, held up the microphone with a twinkle in his eye. "Who's next?"

Gwen took hold of Dean's hand. "Come on, Uncle Dean. As long as Huey is on stage with you, you can sing like a rock star. Just pick your song."

What song would Dean pick? Huey was singing "Its tough to be a god" from the move The Road to El Dorado and "You're Welcome" from Moana. Sam sang "Swinging from a star".

Will the Men of Letters make it into the bunker? Will the Literatos catch up to Sam and Dean?

What do you think? Reviews are what keep me writing.