BAM BAM BAM!!!

Rory awoke to the sound of someone banging on the door of her apartment. She stumbled out of bed and went to answer it, in her nightshirt, mussed hair, in a sleepy stupor.

"Who the hell is banging on our door at 6AM?" yelled Paris from the other room. "Make sure they know we have a taser and we're not afraid to use it!"

Rory glanced through the peephole, then opened the door to let her mother in. Lorelai walked in clutching a cup of coffee in her hands.

"Time to get dressed, hon, I'm taking you out," Lorelai announced.

"What?" Rory asked, not registering what Lorelai was saying.

"Special day for the girls. Up and at 'em, let's go."

"You're taking me nowhere except back to bed," Rory insisted as she turned back towards her bedroom.

"Sorry, kid, can't allow it," Lorelai said as she blocked Rory's way to her room.

"Mom, I've got homework to do, a newspaper meeting this afternoon…maybe we can do this tomorrow."

"Ditch it. Make like it's Iraq. Cut & run."

"What's going on anyway? Just where are you trying to kidnap me to?"

"Sorry, that information is on a need-to-know basis only. Get dressed and all will be revealed."

"I'm going back to bed," Rory announced.

Lorelai pushed Rory aside, raced into her bedroom and grabbed her pillow off her bed. "HA!" she shouted. "Now I've got you, I know you can't sleep without this."

"Oh my God, you are completely deranged. What the hell is going on?"

"I told you, a mother-daughter bonding day," Lorelai informed her. She waved her cup of coffee under Rory's nose to tantalize her. "I've got more of this for you in the car," she said.

Rory sniffed at the coffee and looked longingly as Lorelai took a sip. "Mom, if we bonded any more, we'd be conjoined twins. All the top doctors in the country would be planning our separation surgery. Why won't you tell me what you're planning?"

"If I told you, then you wouldn't want to come."

"Well I'm sold now," Rory said sarcastically as she climbed back into bed.

"OK, I'll wait. I give you 5 minutes." Lorelai said as she brought Rory's pillow back into the living room and sat down with her coffee.

Rory spent about 2 minutes tossing and turning in her bed, unable to get comfortable without her pillow. Finally she gave up and crawled back out of bed.

"I hate you!" she shouted into the living room.

"So do I!" echoed Paris from her room.

Rory came into the living room. "So what do I need to bring?" she demanded.

"Just get dressed. You can wear anything comfortable. All equipment will be provided. I've got coffee for you in the car, and you can even sleep, since we've got a few hours to drive before we get there."

"Equipment? You're not going to try gardening again, are you? You do know it's winter, right?"

"No gardening. Believe me, I learned my lesson that time."

"Where's Dad today, anyway?"

"Off in the world of guys, doing guy things with other guys and all their guy stuff. Today it's just the girls, remember?" Lorelai replied.

Rory got dressed and they both made their way down to Lorelai's Jeep. As Rory got in, she couldn't help but notice the mounds of gear heaped in the back seat. It almost looked like..."Snow gear?" Rory asked.

"Need to know basis," Lorelai reminded her as she climbed into the car and handed a cup of coffee to Rory. "Now go back to sleep, I'll wake you when we get there."

"Just don't forget that Paris witnessed me leaving with you. If they can't find my body, you'll be the prime suspect."

"I'll get a good lawyer," Lorelai replied as they drove off.


Three hours later, Lorelai stopped the car and gave Rory a nudge. "Time to wake up, kid."

Rory grunted as she slowly opened her eyes and studied her surroundings.

"Snow," she observed sleepily.

"We're going skiing," Lorelai announced in an excited tone.

"Mom, you don't ski. Have you ever been skiing in your life?" Rory asked.

"No, but haven't you ever heard that saying that you should do one thing every day that scares you a little?"

"Yes, but you're proposing to spend the entire day doing something completely terrifying. Let's have some perspective here."

"How hard can it be? Strap a pair of boards on my feet and slide down the snow. Gravity does all the work. Besides, I look adorable in all the ski gear."

"Mom, I have no ski gear," Rory reminded her.

"Got it covered, babe. I bought you an outfit too. Mine is purple & white, so I got green for you. The orange one was a little warmer, but it looked awful next to mine."

"Glad to know you have your priorities straight," Rory said.

The two of them got out of the car, went into the lodge to rent their skis and get their lift tickets for the day. Finally, they had all their gear on, and made their way to the top of the slope.

"You really should try out the bunny slope since this is your first time," advised Rory.

"I'd look ridiculous over there with all the little kids," Lorelai said as she contemplated the steep hill in front of her with a great deal of trepidation. "How come you're not on the bunny slope?"

"Mom, I have a confession to make. This is not my first time skiing," Rory admitted.

"What?" Lorelai asked, incredulous.

"Logan took me a few times last year," she said.

"And you never told me?" Lorelai demanded.

"It was just 2 or 3 day trips. I only did a little skiing, It's much nicer in the lodge, drinking hot chocolate and playing Backgammon. I just forgot to tell you because you were all wrapped up with the Inn and wedding plans with Luke last year…"

Lorelai looked down at the ground for a moment, then looked up again and took a deep breath. "Well, clearly we needed this mother-daughter bonding day. I feel like I hardly know you now. What other things have you been hiding from me? Are you joining the next US Olympic bobsled team too?"

"I wasn't hiding it, I just forgot to mention it," Rory insisted.

"Jujitsu? Got your black belt yet?"

"Come on, Mom," Rory insisted as she turned to head down the slope.

Lorelai gave herself a push and promptly fell down. Rory turned around and came back to help her up.

"Bunny slope, huh?" Lorelai asked.

"Definitely," Rory recommended.

"Maybe I'll give it a try. Falling on my ass seriously detracts from how cute I look in this outfit."

Rory rolled her eyes. "So when are you going to tell me what this is all about?" Rory suddenly demanded.

"What?" Lorelai asked as she brushed the snow off herself.

"Today. The sudden need to drive 3 hours in order to freeze our asses off and risk serious bodily injury. The last time you dragged me away suddenly like this, you had just broken things off with Max."

Lorelai suddenly looked guilty.

"I'm thinking maybe we can skip the broken bones and just go have our talk over a game of Backgammon."

"Backgammon, huh?" Lorelai asked. "Should I get you a nice lap blanket for your rocking chair? Knitting needles?"

"Mom," Rory said, her voice increasingly aggravated.

Lorelai sighed. "Hon, I've got some news for you."

"No kidding," Rory replied.

"Well, first thing, honey…Christopher…well, we're going to have to talk to Grandma and Grandpa about paying your Yale tuition this semester."

"What?" Rory asked, incredulous.

"Your dad…well…he tried, but he's never had a great head for business…" Lorelai stammered.

"What's going on, Mom?"

"Rory, your dad is having some financial troubles. He won't be able to pay your tuition this semester."

"But…how? He had so much money…" Rory asked, disbelieving.

"Honey, it's really not your concern. Don't worry about it. You know Grandma and Grandpa will be thrilled – more than thrilled – ecstatic - to put up the money and get their claws into you again."

Rory sighed.

"Lord help you," Lorelai added.

"So what else?" Rory asked.

"What?"

"You said that was the first thing. I'm hoping you started with the bad news."

"I did," Lorelai confirmed.

"Good…" Rory said expectantly.

"And now it's time for the worse news," Lorelai sighed. "Your dad and I are splitting up."

"What?" Rory said, yet again.

"Christopher and I have decided to get a divorce."

"But you just got married."

"I know hon, but we never should have..."

"My God, J-Lo was married longer than you. Britney Spears even pulled it together to stay married. Why the hell can't you - "

"Rory," Lorelai interjected. "I'm sorry. I know you've had this idea in your head of us being a normal family."

"How can you bail on a marriage after 2 months? What happened?"

"Oh, hon, there's so many things I couldn't even begin to explain. Chris and I have known each other forever, we always skirted around being together, getting married, it's almost like we just had to finally try it to see if it would work."

Rory was getting agitated. "So this was just a game for you? A trial run? God, how can you be so cavalier about this? People's lives are affected here, you know. Oh, God, poor Gigi, she's just gotten used to living with you and now she has to move again!"

"Rory - " Lorelai pleaded, but Rory continued.

"First you practically leave Max at the altar, then you and Luke just can't seem to get it together. When you finally took the plunge and married Dad I thought you had finally gotten your crap together. And now this?"

"Rory -" Lorelai tried again.

"Mom, I really don't want to talk to you right now. I don't want to look at you right now," Rory said angrily. She turned away from Lorelai and started skiing down the slope.

"Rory, please," Lorelai pleaded. She pushed off and started skiing down the slope after her, but she couldn't match Rory's skill on skis. She coasted for about a hundred feet until she started to lose her balance, then, arms flailing wildly, she almost succeeded in regaining her balance until she saw a tree rapidly approaching ahead of her.

Lorelai's knee was introduced to the tree with a sickening crunch.


Hours later, Rory and Lorelai sat in the ski lodge lounge in front of a roaring fire. Lorelai's knee was in an Ace bandage, they were sipping hot chocolate and playing Backgammon.

"I'm still mad at you, you know," Rory informed Lorelai.

"You're going to be even madder when I kick your butt at this game," Lorelai replied as she rolled the dice.

"And she doesn't even have the decency to let me win," Rory commented to nobody in particular.

"HA! Doubles," exclaimed Lorelai as she moved her pieces on the board.

"Mom, what went wrong?"

"Rory, I really don't want to talk about it any more."

"Was it the money?"

Lorelai sighed. "Hon, it was the money, it was the way he snores, it was his shoes, my nail clippers, it was anything and everything."

"How is that possible, after 2 months of marriage? How much emotional baggage can you possibly accumulate so fast?"

"Rory, Christopher and I have known each other for most of our lives, we had plenty of baggage before we even got started."

"Was it Luke?"

Lorelai raised her head and looked at Rory in surprise.

"You hooked up with Dad so quickly after you split with him…"

Lorelai sighed. "Oh honey...not really. Your dad will probably disagree, but this marriage wasn't going to work either way, regardless of Luke. Maybe it ended a little sooner than it would've otherwise, that's it."

"Have you thought about seeing a therapist together? Or taking a trip together?"

"Rory…"

"Have you really tried to make this work, Mom?"

They looked at each other for a moment and Rory saw that there were tears in her mother's eyes.

"Rory, sometimes you just know. I know how much you want us to be a family. I know that Gigi is going to get hurt, and I know that I've hurt Christopher, and I wish I could just take that all away…"

Lorelai was suddenly very interested in a nick in the back of her chair as she took a deep breath to hold back the tears.

Rory sighed and contemplated for a moment. "OK, Mom," she said softly. Then she shifted gears. "I think this occasion calls for A Piece of Ass," she announced.

"Excuse me?"

"Amaretto, Southern Comfort and sour mix," Rory explained. "I'll be right back."

Rory headed over to the bar to get the drinks, but suddenly turned back to face Lorelai.

"I just want you to be happy, you know."

Lorelai smiled back at her. "In that case, please don't make me drink that concoction. Martini for me, if you will."


A/N: OK, I expect to take some flak for this chapter – I've read a number of fics that have Rory wanting Lorelai to ditch Chris and hook up with Luke, but I just don't find that realistic. Chris is her father, after all. She will eventually accept it and be fine with it, but I really think it's unrealistic to expect her to rejoice at hearing that her parents are getting divorced.

For all you Luke lovers, I have 3 more chapters planned for this story, and all of them will prominently feature Luke. Finally.