Sorry for the long wait but i was really busy with personal stuff...

So I changed back to Marissa's POV again like it's supposed to be.

It's in the middle of the night here in Germany so I hope I didn't make too many mistakes but I can't really see clear anymore, either.

I'm like Marissa hahaha

So obviously you all know where this is going...

subscribe and review please

i lalalaloveeee feedback

Title: Liquor & Love Discovery

Fandom: The O.C.

Ship: Marissa/Alex

Warning: None


Chapter: 4

I Don't Care

As I awoke, I felt my head exploding. Well obviously not literally. I felt a rush of nausea coming up so I threw away the blankets and immediately ran to the bathroom.
As I pushed my face into the toilet bucket I wondered how I got home. The last thing I remembered was drinking at the beach and I met this girl.

I combed through my memories I remembered her name: Alex. I'm not quite sure who she actually was, but I didn't care too much either.

Another trace of nausea overcame me and I had to puke again. Eww, I hated vomiting. But it was inevitable after drinking like I did.

I grabbed some of the toilet papers and cleaned my mouth with it.

Yuck!

I got up and leaned over the washbasin and sighed softly. I looked up in the mirror in front of me. What have I become? I remembered a time when I actually felt something like happiness. But that was long gone. It's all a big blur, the Marissa then is not at all comparable to the Marissa from today. The Marissa who drank like a hole, smoked like a chimney and fucked around with everyone. What has happened to the old Marissa, I asked myself.

"Oh I know…She got her heart broken…", I said to the mirror. I actually whispered it, but you could still hear it though.

I opened the mirror cabinet and took out my purple toothbrush. I looked for the toothpaste and finally found it laying on the ground next to some empty shampoo bottles and a lipstick.

No idea where that stuff came from, seriously.

I brushed my teeth to get the disgusting taste out off my mouth. I grimaced and wrinkled my nose. Hopefully I didn't had to puke again. I got my hopes up too soon, though. After a few seconds I had to put my head in the toilet bowl once again. Same procedure all over again. Taking out the toothbrush and the toothpaste, brushing my teeth again. I finally felt a little bit better, although my stomach said different. It felt empty, but there was no chance I was going to get something to eat, though.

I closed the mirror cabinet again still staring at my reflection. I closed my eyes and tried to think of somebody else.

Ryan.

Again.

It really starts to get annoying after a time. Why was I even putting myself through this? It's not like I'm getting back to him with this kind of attitude. He fell for the Marissa from the past and not the present one. Nobody fell for the one that looked back at myself right now.

I was disgusted by myself. How could I let myself down like that? I'm sure Ryan wouldn't want me to grieve over him all the time, he would want me to move one. But I guess it's harder to say and to actually do so.

I walked out of my bathroom when I heard my mother yelling from downstairs. I rolled my eyes and locked the door to my room so she couldn't enter. I closed my eyes once again but this time not to get a clear mind but to shut up the noises which were arising in my head. I definitively got a headache and was not at all prepared to face the fury also known my mom.

I couldn't deal with that right now so I crumbled back to bed and wrapped myself into the blankets. As I heard her knock at the door to my room I just lifted a pillow up and put it back in my face just to not hear her again. After a while of ignoring she probably understood I was not going to talk to her. I never did. In the last few months I didn't really talk to anyone than myself and that girl I met yesterday. But I didn't really care about talking to anyone.

I slept for a few hours and then woke up again. I looked at my alarm clock and saw it was already 8pm. Time to get up.

I crawled out of bed and almost fell over some empty beer bottles which still lay on the floor. They must have been a few days old already. I walked across to the window since my room kind of started to smell after cigarettes and liquor.

I walked around in my room for a few minutes until I finally managed to pick my thoughts. I moved closely to my closet and opened the wide doors. I looked inside but there was nothing actually catching my attention. Maybe it was because I didn't really know where I was going tonight anyways. Well I didn't even know what day it was. Yesterday I must have started drinking at midday and the store I bought it from was open, which means it definitely wasn't Sunday. Ok, so that wasn't helping at all. Anyways, I was going to go out tonight no matter what day it was. I just randomly took out some black ripped shirt and my white skinny jeans. I figured they were also ripped, but not because of style, I probably fell down somewhere and ripped my pants and the knee parts. I didn't care too much.

I quickly put on the shirt and jeans when I looked for my biker boots. They were laying underneath my bed so I had to get on my knees and grab them. Now the only thing that was missing was make-up and my leather jacket. I found it really quickly it still lay on my bed from last night. Or, well, from yesterday.

I went over to the bathroom and put on make-up. I figured I put a tiny little bit too much, but as usual I couldn't care less.

I was almost ready only the last detail was there yet. My flask. I searched it in my whole room when I finally found it behind a nightstand. I shook it. Empty. I rolled my eyes, obviously it was empty. I went back to the bathroom and rinsed it and then immediately refilled it with some Jack Daniel's which I found lying on the ground. I took a big sip out of the bottle and the brown liquid almost flowed down my chin because I drank it too jerkily. I wiped the liquor off of my chin with my sleeve. Now let's get this party started.

I grabbed my purse and stormed out the door. I almost stumbled as I rushed down the stairs of our huge mansion. I took a look around and figured it was actually a beautiful place, but I never appreciated it before, so why would I do so now?

I slammed the big front door behind me after I picked up the keys of my car. I walked down the steps to the drive way. I clicked on the little button on the car keys and directly heard the sound of my car being unlocked. I jumped in and putt he keys into their matching place. I pressed my foot on the gas and drove away.

I drove around for a while and looked for a good place to get myself smashed. I already had order to stay away from 80% of the clubs in Newport Beach. But I wasn't known by all of them yet. So I drove a bit longer until I finally found a good location to take my rest.

I stopped the car in front of a shabby looking bar-thing, whatever it was.

Iook out my keys and opened the car door, at this moment I wasn't so sure anymore if this place was right for me. But when I saw a few fucked up looking people loafing into the club I knew this was exactly where I was supposed to be.

I slammed the door of my black Chevrolet and locked it, in this area it was not the best idea to leave your car unlocked parked somewhere.

I glanced over at the dim light shining from inside the club. It wasn't as bright. Good, since I was still a bit hung over I wouldn't have wanted any over-lightened discotheque, at all. There was music playing really loud, wasn't my type of music but at least it wasn't some clubbing shit, it was rather chill and kind of alternative, actually not what you would expect from a mainstream club, right?

Well, the only thing that wasn't mainstream about this building were definitively the type of people walking in there. They all seemed kind of fucked up or broke and with broke I mean no money. They actually looked like hobos, but I didn't care I wasn't here to hook up with some dude anyways. I just wanted cheap liquor and chill music and this place totally seemed suitable fort hat kind of plan.

I walked across the parking lot and arrived at the entrance. Against my expectations there was no bouncer to check the crowd walking in, so I supposed there was no need to check us. I passed a few guys by who were almost drooling at the sight of me.

God, how I hate guys.

As I walked in I saw just a bunch of people hanging around at the bar. My destination.

I had to cross a whole empty dance floor to make my way through the mass of non existing people. Wow, I don't think I've ever seen a club as empty as this one. I didn't care, as long as my fake ID would get accepted I was all content. My first aim was convincing the bartender of my age. I put some sad attempt of a seductive grin on my face when I started to focus my destination.

Again, this club seemed to be different from the others.

"What can I do for you?"

The bartender didn't look up and just waited for my answer of and order. The bartender was, contrary to my expectations, a woman. She seemed similar and as she looked up still waiting for my answer I instantly recognized her. It was the girl from the beach.

She looked rather startled and confused. Nothing to compare to her self-pleased look yesterday. She didn't look too happy to see me again. Well no wonder, I just met her and passed out right at the beginning. Well, no one invited her to remain at my place and no one told her to stay or to communicate with me, either. But I didn't care.

She raised an eyebrow, just like she did one day earlier.

"May I see your ID, Miss?"Ok, this was definitively not how it was supposed to be.


So this is it for now.

I don't really like this Chapter, but it was a necessary one so sorry if you find it boring but I needed to get Marissa to The Baitshop hehe