Jack settles on the other end of the couch after carrying Aaron to the bedroom for his afternoon nap. Her eyes are on the Christmas movie still playing on the TV, but he can tell that her mind is elsewhere.

A few moments pass before she turns to him, voicing what has been on her mind. "Jack, you've never had more than a weekend off of work. How did you manage to get all this time off to bring us up here?"

"I do have vacation days, Kate," he replies with a small smile. But it fades a moment later when the lie hits him, and he knows that if he is ever going to have a chance of fixing things with her, he has to be completely honest about how badly he had screwed things up. "Actually… I haven't exactly been working recently."

Her questioning eyes meet his, "Why not?"

He lets out a long breath before taking the plunge, "I showed up drunk and looking for a high on one of my days off. The chief of surgery caught me stealing narcotics from the hospital when I couldn't get them filled at the pharmacy."

"They fired you?"

He shakes his head, "I'm suspended. They told me I had three months to get cleaned up, or they would fire me."

"When was that?"

"A week before I asked you to meet me at the airport."

"Why didn't you tell me?" she asks, resting her hand on his forearm.

"I didn't want to admit to you how badly I had messed up. And it wouldn't have mattered to you anyway. If anything, it just would have confirmed for you how screwed up I had let myself become and that you and Aaron were better off without me." Jack looks down at her hand, realizing for the first time that she isn't wearing the engagement ring, though this doesn't surprise him at all. It's just another reminder of his mistakes and what they had cost him, just like the pain he can see in her eyes every time they meet his.

Kate glances at the TV screen for a moment, then turns back to him, "I owe you an explanation, Jack."

"You don't owe me anything, Kate. What happened was my fault."

She ignores him, "Sawyer has a daughter. That's what he told me on the helicopter before he kissed me and jumped out. And that's where I was that day - with her."

He brings his eyes up from her hand still on his arm to meet hers, "Kate, you don't have to tell me this."

"Yes, I do. It's what started the fight, and it's probably at least part of the reason you were drinking."

He slowly nods, "I was worried there was someone else."

"There was, just probably not what you were expecting. He asked me to find her, make sure she was taken care of."

"And after nearly three years, you managed to track her down."

She gives him a smile and shakes her head, "Not exactly. It only took me a month to find her after we got back and settled. Turns out her mother is a friend of sorts. She helped me out once when I was on the run. Even told me that she had just been conned out of all her money by this guy, that he got her pregnant. Never imagined that Sawyer and I had a mutual friend."

"So you've visited them before?" he asks.

"Clementine and Aaron have playdates every couple months."

"Then why was Aaron at home and not with you that day?"

"Cassidy and I met up for dinner without the kids after she got off work."

"Why didn't you just tell me? I wouldn't be mad at you having friends."

"I couldn't tell you without it becoming about Sawyer, and he wouldn't want everyone to know," she admits. "But I should have just been honest with you instead of giving you a reason not to trust me."

"I do trust you, Kate. And I hope that one day you are able to trust me again," he puts his hand over hers and gently squeezes it.

They sit quietly for a minute before she turns her whole body on the couch to face him. "Jack, I know you've had your doubts before and probably still with everything that has happened, but you need to know that you are really good with him. You're like a father to him, and he really missed you. So whatever happens between the two of us - if we aren't able to work things out - I'm not going to stop you from seeing Aaron as long as you stay clean. I don't want to put him through that loss again, and if being around him is your motivation for doing this, I don't want to jeopardize your sobriety."

"I won't hurt him again, Kate. I promise." He wants to promise her that he won't break her heart again, but he's afraid that the words would only succeed in pushing her further away from him. Having her here with him would have to be enough for now.

~Lost~

"Stop, Jack!" Aaron squeals, trying to wiggle away as he is tickled. Kate dries her hands on a towel, finished with the dishes from their light dinner, and comes to stand beside the couch to watch them. "Save me, Mommy," he struggles to call out in between laughing.

"You started it," Jack points out, hands moving from the boy's feet to his tummy.

She eventually takes mercy on him and says, "I think it's bath time."

"Aw," Aaron pouts as the doctor finally relents.

"You have to be nice and clean for Santa."

"Jack help?" he eagerly looks up at the man.

"Jack can bathe you," she agrees. He may have been out of practice, but Jack had bathed Aaron plenty of times when they were together, and she is sure he can manage on his own. "But no splashing and no tickle fights in the bathroom."

Twenty minutes later Aaron scampers into her bedroom to get his pajamas. Kate, who had finished changing into her own sleep attire and been staring at a small wrapped box hidden in her suitcase, helps him to get dressed. "What happened to Jack?" she asks.

"He got wet," her son replies, miserably failing at appearing innocent in the matter.

"What have I told you about splashing?" she says, pulling his pajama top over his head.

"Jack started it," he tells her, big blue eyes looking at her as he hopes not to get in trouble. "I sorry, Mama."

"It's my fault, Kate. Don't be mad at him," Jack appears in the doorway, a faded t-shirt and sweatpants having now replaced the clothes she had last seen him in.

She shakes her head at the two of them, but the slight smile on her face tells them she isn't mad. "You ready for Santa to come?"

Aaron nods eagerly, "I stay up all night to see him."

"Santa won't come if you're still awake," she replies, poking him in the belly. "You want to sleep with Jack again tonight?"

"No, I sleep with you, Mommy," he replies.

She hadn't expected this answer but figures she would just wait a couple hours until she knows he's sound asleep before sneaking out to put the presents under the tree. "Sure, goober," she smiles.

"Story time?" he asks, looking up at Jack.

"Let me go get a book," Jack says, heading out to the living room.

Aaron goes to his backpack on the bedroom floor by his suitcase and pulls out the book Jack had brought him a few days ago while Kate quickly shuts her own suitcase so that the present inside isn't seen.

The doctor comes back with a new book, Olive the Other Reindeer, "How about this one?"

Aaron holds up Twas the Night before Christmas and hopefully says, "Read both?"

"You think you can stay awake for both?" Jack teases.

"I a big boy," Aaron nods eagerly. "Mommy, you listen to story too," he tugs on her hand, pulling her toward the bed.

Having never really been there for story time other than the occasional peek in on her boys, she glances at Jack for confirmation that he is okay with that. He gives her a small smile and nod. She pulls back the covers, picks up Aaron, and puts him in the middle of the bed.

As she climbs in next to him, Jack goes around to the other side and sits down, leaning against the headboard and opening up the book he had chosen. Aaron settles back against Kate, both of them laying on their sides to face him, and he starts reading.

When he finishes the first book, he finds Aaron still wide awake, but Kate's eyes are closed, though he isn't sure if she has actually fallen asleep. "You sure you don't want to sleep yet?" he checks with Aaron as he picks up the other book.

"No sleep. More stories!" Aaron says, though his eye lids are definitely heavier than they had been just a few short minutes ago.

"Alright. But this is the last one, and then you have to go to sleep or Santa won't come."

"Okay," Aaron agrees.

Halfway through the book, he notices that the little boy's eyes have closed, but he finishes the book anyway. He watches them sleep, wishing he could lay down and spend the night here too. But he doesn't want to make her feel pressured in any way.

Plus, Santa hasn't come yet, and he isn't exactly sure what Kate had wanted to do. He just doesn't want Aaron to wake up the next morning and not find presents under the tree.

"Good night," Jack whispers and leans down to press his lips against Aaron's forehead. Then he moves his head a couple inches over so that his lips brush Kate's cheek, unable to resist. Eventually he pulls his eyes away from his family after a last long look and eases himself off the bed, turning the light off and closing the bedroom door behind him as he leaves.

He pulls his shoes and coat on, grabs his keys, and heads out to the car to get all of the bags of presents. It takes several trips, and unfortunately Kate is still asleep when he finally finishes. He really doesn't want to wake her up, wants to prove to her and to himself that he can be good at being a father, but he is afraid that he will mess it up and ruin Santa for Aaron.

Sitting down on the floor by the tree, he starts to pull presents out of the bags and arrange them under the tree, trying to be as quiet as possible so Aaron doesn't wake up. When he finishes, he eats one of the cookies left for Santa as he surveys his work. Then he pours most of the milk down the sink to make it look like Santa drank it. He looks down the hallway toward his bedroom for a long moment before going to retrieve one last package from his suitcase. He sets it in the branches of the tree, out of Aaron's reach, and though he knows Kate certainly would have done a better job at this, he decides has done a decent job of giving Aaron a great Christmas.