Warning! I should probably warn that there will be a fair bit of swearing. When I say fair, I mean a lot. This is me after all guys. :)

Disclaimer: I own nothing to do with Soap, Ghost, or any other part of Modern Warfare as they all belong to Infinity Ward. I'm just amateur writer who likes to borrow them a little. I do own Lara 'Bones' McCoy of course.

Note from Sassy: Well since a total computer crash has temporarily stalled the next chapter of CITS, I thought that it was about time to get posting another drabble. I've had a few requests for something that revolves around Lara and Toad, and so here it is, complete with Toad/Archer undertones (because I'm obsessed :P). As always, gigantic thanks and hugs go to the amazing MisMot who is always a fountain of inspiration.

On my usual scene setting note, this drabble is set just after the events of chapter nine of CITS with Lara injured after her disastrous operation in Afghanistan. :)

MisMot: Don't you even dare think about stopping giving me ideas! That would be terrible. Although I agree with you on the subject of Soap and his tattoos ;) As for my character dynamics, well as always you are way too kind there. I'm certainly very glad that they aren't boring. Gah, you just know I adore you haha. :P

That Person: Pfft, growing up is overrated if you ask me. :P But thank you so much for your review! I'm glad that you liked all the characterisations :D As for whether or not these drabbles link up, I don't really plan on it. I might write some drabbles which do link up within this, but really this fic is more just a collection of random prompts and ideas I get given that I can't write into my main story realistically. :)

SevereGamingAddict: Welcome back! :) And thank you so much for this review. I'm really glad that you enjoyed the SoapxLara too. As for ToadxArcher, I'm currently working on another fic for them in their own right, as well as a Toad/Bones/Archer fic. Hopefully that should satisfy your Toarcher cravings. :D

Jolineloveszombie: Thank you! Your review was totally amazing, so really, thank you so much for all the lovely compliments :) I'm so glad you enjoyed it all, even with le Blue Balls Lara being a total tease. ;) I do have a vengeance fic where Soap gets his own back… I may post it at some point if I'm brave enough. :P

panpanpeppermint: Aw, thanks, I'm glad that you liked the tease. As for Lara and the age thing, well she was joking, much like I do. I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter though. :)

SamuraiWriter: First off I'm glad my first real SoapxLara didn't disappoint! :) I really am so totally flattered that I inspire you, truly. So thank you so much. :) Also, I'm so relieved that you mentioned that the dynamics between Soap and Lara and Lara and Ghost are different, because that's something I really try to work hard at. But seriously, thank you again! :)


Ghost had never been more wrong. There was nothing about operations that Lara got off on. They merely left her feeling bitter, spent and empty once the initial rush of adrenaline within her system had dissipated.

As a result when Toad had dangled the prospect of vodka and a quiet place away from the rest of the men in front of her, Lara had taken him up on his offer in a heartbeat. Barely an hour later she'd found herself tucked away in his room, sprawled out across his bed with a half empty bottle of vodka resting on the sheets between them.

"I really need this." It was against her better judgement but right then Lara didn't give a damn if her medication and the alcohol would clash. No matter how many pain killers she pumped into her system her shoulder still hurt like a bitch, and at least being pissed would ensure that she'd no longer care, if only for a little while. She lifted the vodka glass slowly, her hands already unsteady from the previous shots, before tilting it towards him with a courteous nod. A small smile etched its way across Toad's features and she threw back her head, swallowing the bitter liquid without hesitation. "Thank you."

"You're a lot more polite than my usual drinking partner." He was already refilling her glass before she even had to ask.

"Archer?"

"That's him." The sniper instinctively laughed, taking his own glass and pouring himself a decent measure of alcohol. He grinned over the top of it at her, leaning against the wall to steady himself. "Grumpy son of a bitch."

"I can't see him saying much somehow."

"Exactly, he doesn't. Just kinda grunts mostly."

"The speaking kind of grunting… or the other kind?" Normally she wouldn't have said a word, or would have at least rephrased the question, but alcohol had lowered her inhibitions and Lara found herself giving in to her own curiosity. She smiled, watching Toad's reaction, one eyebrow raised almost knowingly as she swilled the clear vodka around in her glass.

"Who wants to know?"

"Just me."

"Then in that case…both." The sniper smirked, casually swallowing his drink in one go. "Just don't spread it around. I don't like the idea of being labelled as the base queer…. Or being labelled as anything, actually."

"There's nothing wrong with being gay…"

"I know, but I'm not. He's not…. Archer and me… We just have an agreement." Toad shrugged. "It's… different with him."

"So you're… together?"

"We're best friends." Toad rolled his eyes, shrugging back another hastily poured shot of vodka as he did so. Lara glanced down at her own drink, pushing away the feeling of nausea and forcing it down. "Like I said, I hate labels."

"That's smart." She sighed. "Besides, nothing's static here anyway."

"You've got that right."

"Must be nice though…"

"What must be?" The look on Toad's face was nothing but quizzical, his right eyebrow quirking upwards.

"You know… having someone… like that."

"Someone to fuck?"

"Not necessarily!" Lara shook her head, her voice replaced by a nervous laugh. "Just someone who gives a damn, you know?"

"Don't you?"

"I thought I had. But MacTavish is too busy trying to run around after everyone that he's spread too thin…." She paused, unscrewing the vodka herself, this time drinking straight from the bottle, the burning fluid causing her to splutter.

"You've got something going on with the Captain?"

"Hell no! Nothing like that." She sighed. "Think of it more as me feeling like some pathetic little schoolgirl with a crush and him not paying even the slightest bit of notice."

"Ah." The right corner of Chris' mouth twitched up into a half hearted smile. "I can relate."

"You?" Lara scoffed. "I thought you were nothing short of a Lothario?"

"Pretty much." Toad adjusted his position on the bed casually. "Basically I'm the guy Meat thinks he is. You know, since my conquests don't ask to be paid afterwards and all." He laughed. "But last I checked we were supposed to be talking about you."

"I think we exhausted that topic."

"Only the part about your adorable little crush."

"Fuck you." Lara slapped at his arm in annoyance.

"There's already a waiting list for that." Chris teased. "But anyway, what's with all this alone bullshit? You've got Gary, right?"

"I don't know where I stand with him. Last time we spoke… well, it didn't go well." She shook her head, not quite able to meet his gaze. "It's this job… I don't know. I guess it just helps to have someone to confide in, someone who is in the same position as me." She shrugged. "Maybe it helps me justify it sometimes."

"Deep…" Toad sighed softly, resting his head back against the wall. "But I've got to be straight with you, Bones. I've had way too much vodka to be able to talk like this."

"Maybe that's for the best."

"You've got that right." Suddenly Toad was moving again, leaning over Lara's legs beside him to reach into his bed side cabinet, his hands purposefully pulling out a full glass bottle of dark rum, the brown liquid sloshing around within the confines of the glass. He gave it a demonstrative shake, his mouth turning into a mischievous grin as he pulled away from her. "So how about we just get wasted instead?"

"What good will that do?"

"I find alcohol solves most problems. Or at least makes you so inebriated that you don't care anymore."

"Really professional…"

"Fuck professional. If I'm downed on the next op the last thing I want on want on my mind is regret. Believe me, bleeding out is bad enough." He smirked. "Think about it… You, me and copious alcohol. What's there to refuse?"

"You know… " Lara laughed, angling her glass towards him. "Fuck it. Let's do it."

Two shots turned into four. Four turned into alternate swigs of vodka and rum. A heady mix of analgesic painkillers and alcohol in her bloodstream lead to an exquisite kind of mindlessness that had Lara laughing and sniggering like a teenager again. The immaturity was a far cry from the evac bird they'd all piled into barely 24 hours before and yet right then McCoy knew that it was exactly what she needed to forget about Antonov, Ghost and the constant stabbing pain deep within her shoulder. With anyone else it would have felt unnatural, but somehow Toad's entire attitude to life seemed to be contagious, steadily corrupting her into thinking that drinking and laughter were the only real remedy to the discontent in her thoughts. In reality Lara realised that all she was doing was avoiding her problems, but she was willing to ignore that fact just to keep the warm, contented feeling in the pit of her stomach alive.

"Do you ever have time for those things?" Her vision was unfocused and yet McCoy still managed to nod towards the far side of the room. She allowed her eyes to linger on the set of black DJ decks in lieu of elaborating further.

"Not as often as I like… but I wasn't going to leave them back home." He rolled his eyes. "They're way too expensive."

"They look confusing…" Her gaze swam back to Toad's expectantly.

"It's simple when you know how."

"Then show me." Lara nodded quickly, standing up and trying to control her staggering legs as much as possible.

"What?"

"Show me how it works… I'm intrigued." She made a move towards the decks, hearing Toad's soft footsteps behind her as he followed. By the time she reached the decks she was already leaning on them casually for support.

"Well… You know how to play vinyl, right?"

"No…"

"Fucking novice…" Toad laughed softly, the ringing of his voice in her ears telling her that he was stood directly behind her. "I'll show you." She expected him to elbow her out of the way, but he made no such move, instead turning round and grabbing a record from behind him. Clumsily, yet still respectfully he pulled the vinyl out of its case, his arms reaching around her waist to place it on the decks. Lara's body tensed, the movement causing him to be practically pressed against her back, his hands moving the arm of the stereo system into position on the outside of the record. His right hand moved quickly and took hold of her wrist, pressing her own right hand against the record arm. "See that? You have to queue it up from the outside, otherwise it's not gonna happen." The record began to spin beneath her hand and Lara smiled when a soft, beeping intro began to play, slowly building in intensity. Toad's right hand still holding her wrist, his free left one snaked around her body, twisting one of the equalizer dials on the system just in time for the heavy drop in the bass, vibrations shimmering up Lara's hand and echoing through her body. She blinked hard. This wasn't supposed to feel so good…

The soft vocals suddenly started to bleed out over the music, a complete contrast with the heavy pounding of the bass line that sounded as though it was forcing itself from the speakers. Toad's left hand moved again, his forearm brushing against her as he twisted some more of the dials, the track suddenly becoming that little bit crisper around them.

She'd never really thought of herself as being someone lead by her senses, but the combination of the loud music, alcohol and Toad's close proximity made for a seriously hedonic thrill. Lara knew that she should hate herself for thinking such unprofessional thoughts, that she should run now before she fell into bed with another colleague. But she didn't move, in some ways she couldn't. It was wrong, a mistake, but that did nothing to quieten the loneliness that was currently raging through her mind. She was alone, and at last the feeling was beginning to catch up with her.

If that RPG had been any closer, she'd have been dead. Gone, blown away, another medic to be replaced, just like Chemo before her. The thought had given her a painful dose of reality. And like Toad said, what was the point in regrets?

"You're very close…" She might have accepted that she wanted him, but Lara was in no mind to make the first move.

"Yeah… I am." Toad shrugged softly against her. "I kinda thought this was what you wanted."

"Who said it wasn't?"

"I could have gotten the wrong idea." His words might have been asking for confirmation, but Chris' voice was hardly insecure. That was the problem with Toad; the fact that he wasn't only attractive, but that he was well aware of it too.

"Believe me… you're right." Regardless, McCoy leant back against him, her head dropping back onto his right shoulder so that her bleary eyes were just able to see him in her peripheral vision. "But what about Archer?"

"What about him?" Toad laughed gently, tilting his head so that he could nuzzle into the limited exposed skin of her neck, his lips grazing across her ear and the hypersensitive area below it. "We're not married, Bones."

"Won't he care?"

"Do we know the same Archer?" The sniper chuckled against her skin. "He doesn't give a fuck what I do so long as I let him win at poker and I'm around when he wants some." He smirked, breathing against the damp patches of her neck. "He's not a problem."

"You're sure?"

"What? Are you trying to think up excuses why we shouldn't or something?"

"No!"

"Then why are you stalling?" He grinned against her neck, dragging his teeth across the skin lightly whilst his right hand snaked up to begin peeling back her shirt. "You do want this, right?"

"I…" Words weren't forming in her thoughts and Lara's hand moved up quickly, catching his wrist as he began to push her shirt off her shoulder, revealing the tatty grey vest top underneath. "What if someone walks in?"

"They won't…" As if to prove a point, he leant forwards, pushing her with him as his left hand fumbled for the volume controls. With a swift twist of his fingers the volume increased, the bass reverberating through Lara's chest which was now trapped between the decks and Toad himself. Behind her, she just heard him laugh, his body pressing against her as he kissed along the back of her neck, each pressure against her skin teasing and calculated. "And now they won't hear us either." His hands were already beginning to tug up the fabric of her vest top, the cold plastic of the decks pressing firmly against her skin. Lara struggled to lift her arms and help him, but her injured shoulder grunted abruptly with pain, sending a loud groan from her body.

"Shit…You ok?…"

"I can't lift my arms…" She muttered apologetically into the decks before twisting round awkwardly so that she was facing him, her back now pressed against the controls. It was the first time she'd seen him since they'd started their "encounter" and his normally warm, brown eyes were now dark and glazed over with lust. "Sorry…"

"Does it hurt?" Toad was glancing thoughtfully at her chest.

"Like fuck."

"And how much do you like that vest?"

"What?... I… Chris!" She was interrupted by two strong fists knotting themselves in the fabric above her sternum, wrenching at the fabric and tearing the fragile cotton, effectively answering the question for her. The tear soon grew down to her navel and a firm tug pulled the garment completely in two, Toad giving her a self satisfied smile. She opened her mouth to protest further but he quickly silenced her, leaning down and pressing a row of kisses up her abdomen. "I'll buy you another one."

As he began kissing her torso again, Lara thought better of arguing, instead closing her eyes and relinquishing what little control she had left. By now there was no denying how much either of them wanted this, and Toad's controlled, painfully slow kisses and sucks against her skin were her undoing. She held back as long as possible but soon it just wasn't enough, her hands reaching down and pulling him up into a dominating kiss. It satisfied her momentarily, but before long she was striving for more, tugging almost desperately at his t shirt, her movements frantic and lacking all control.

He was less muscular than Ghost or MacTavish, but he was still toned, his muscles clearly defined and highlighted beneath his skin as her fingers raked across them. Settling herself on biting at his collar bone, she fumbled with his belt, thumbs hooking into the elastic of his boxers as soon as she was able. She fought to push them down, but Toad stopped her quickly, firm hands at her wrists.

"Wait… Unless you actually want maternity leave…" He staggered back from her, his trousers and boxers hanging low so that his hip bones were clearly visible. After a quick rummage in his bedside drawer he was back, his mouth distracting her with tortuous kisses to her face and neck. When he spoke his mouth was pressed against her ear, his voice low. "Stand up…"

"Why?"

"Because I'm not doing this over my decks…" To prove a point his hands shot down to her hips, supporting them whilst he lifted her upwards. Lara was powerless but to hang on with her bare thighs, their hips grinding from the action. It seemed to affect Toad more than it affected her, and he groaned softly against her ear. "Fuck it…"

Any thoughts of actually making it to his bed seemed lost in seconds, Lara's back pressed against the cold wall, her legs still wrapped tightly around his waist when Toad snapped his hips forwards, forcing a sharp gasp from Lara's mouth. She tried to kiss him clumsily in return but his mouth seemed to be everywhere, lips raking across her neck, jaw and shoulder. In the end she gave in, tightening the grip of her thighs, content to simply ride out the feeling.

Toad was strong enough to support them for a decent length of time but eventually he legs buckled beneath them and they toppled sideways to the floor, the sniper landing clumsily on top of her. The pain was immense, but she tried not to register it, silently hoping that her release would be enough to block it out as he began to move his hips again. When he finally tensed and collapsed on top of her, Lara was lost in her own world of hopeless abandon, her thoughts well and truly lifted out of her control.

It wasn't like with Ghost. Toad made no move to get off her straight away, instead propping himself up above her on his elbows, his mouth pressing a fleeting, tired kiss to her lips. It was nothing like they'd shared before, managing to be compassionate without attempting to be loving or overly sentimental. He grinned, his light brown hair ruffled into unkempt tufts from Lara's frantic hands.

"No regrets, right?"

"None." She laughed softly. "More like tension release…"

"Yeah…however unconventional." He smirked. "Fucking, sparring, it all does the job in the end. Fucking's more fun though. Usually."

He finally moved to stand, carefully climbing off her and pulling up the boxers that had pooled around his ankles. He watched her stand slowly, handing her what remained of her clothes with a soft laugh. "Why do I feel fifteen again?"

"Because we didn't even make it into bed?"

"Maybe…" He shrugged. "Or it could just be that weird feeling I've got… like when I used to be terrified of my Dad running in when I was in the middle of something." He laughed, catching the t shirt that Lara threw in his direction. "He'd have a long way to come to catch me this time though…"

It was almost scarily on cue, but before Lara could reply there was a loud banging at Toad's door, the wood shaking in its hinges. Lara instantly jumped, grabbing her shirt and pulling it up to cover her exposed torso. Fortunately the door never actually opened, a loud, pissed off Essex accent instead yelling out from outside.

"Chris! I can hear that shit you call music in the fucking rec room!" Lara tried to suppress a childish laugh as Toad gave her an over exaggerated look of exasperation, a wide grin spreading across his features. He lifted a finger to his lips, before reaching over to turn down the music.

"You know me, Jeff. I hate quiet."

"Too fucking right." The gruff voice replied. "Either way, the next time you decide to have a wank over your music, turn it down."

As soon as they heard footsteps along the corridor, Lara allowed the laugh she'd been holding back to finally spill from her lips, Toad giving her a smug smile in return. He pulled on his t shirt quickly, rolling his eyes. "Wank over my music? If only he knew…"

"What would he say?"

"Fuck knows…" Toad shrugged softly. "I'll tell you one thing though."

"What?"

"Part of me wants to find out…"


Ok, so Lara's a whore, but at least she has a lot of fun while she's at it. :P As always, a huge thank you from me for reading this far and if you fancy throwing me a review then you know where the review button is. :D

-x-Sass-x-