Ch. 4
AN: I keep reserving this chapter for Lily, but then I think of something else and that then becomes the new chapter. Lily will most likely make an appearance in ch.5, but for now, here's James.
James lathered up his washcloth and proceeded in washing his body. He heard someone pound on the bathroom door, but he didn't hear who it was or what they were saying because his beautiful singing voice drowned out their words. Singing in the shower was James' second favorite thing to do in the bathroom (his favorite thing was clip coupons, for his mum. It made him feel like the super saver).
The banging continued and James continued to ignore it. He wasn't done with his song and whoever was on the other side could wait longer, learn to have some patience.
"Hannah takes the stairs and I usually take the elevator, every now and then she offers me a lemon now and later," James sang. He cleaned behind his ears and in between his toes. He needed to have a thoroughly clean body if he wanted to be as beautiful as possible.
"James Sirius Potter, out of that bathroom, NOW!" Ginny shouted from the other side of the door.
"Not clean yet, mum!" James called back. He continued his scrubbing and singing. He wasn't aware that Ginny was trying to show Lily how to make a dish for her book club and was now suffering some serious side effects from a failed attempt. Because she was a mother and mothers sacrifice for her children, Ginny let Lily have the bathroom downstairs and she was trying her best to make it to the bathroom.
"No, now!" Ginny unlocked the door and threw herself into the bathroom. She grabbed James from the shower and threw him out of the bathroom, tossing a towel out behind him and slammed the door.
James quickly wrapped the towel around his waist and looked around to see who could have possibly saw him. To his dismay, he saw his father poking his head out from his office. James figured he heard the commotion and was investigating at a distance.
"Hi dad," James said, filling the awkward silence.
"You do realize you were in there for 45 minutes, right?" Harry said.
"I like to be thoroughly clean."
"You take longer showers than your mother and Lily combined," Harry pointed out. "And they're women!"
James opened his mouth to say something, but closed it, finding it futile. He nodded and looked back at the bathroom. How long does it take to use the bathroom?
"I don't think she's going to be out anytime soon," Harry said, answering his son's mental question.
"Aren't you supposed to be working or something?" James asked.
"This is worth procrastination."
"Watching me stand out here with a towel on?"
"No, watching you being thrown out of the bathroom naked and then watching you stand there. It's like you don't have a clue what to do next." Harry laughed.
James looked down at himself and then back at his father, who was still laughing. "Well, I can work on my singing."
"What's there to work on?"
"I am going to pursue a career in signing and I need to practice everyday," James straightened up and held his head high.
"Oh really?" If he was being serious, Harry couldn't tell. It's hard to take your son seriously when he was still standing in the middle of the hall with a towel smaller than he thought it was, wrapped around his waist. In Harry's mind, James was asking to be de-toweled.
"Yeah. I am going to make music that you can sing to while in the shower. I'll call my first album James Potter: in the shower. My sweet seductive voice will make anybody's voice. In fact, they'll have to put a warning label on the case that fainting may occur because my voice can knock any girl unconscious and bring anyone out of a coma," James struck a pose.
Harry, seeing the opportunity knocking on his office door, wandlessly de-toweled the teen. Just before James to scramble the towel back around his waist, Harry banished it.
"DAD!" James screamed so high, his voice cracked. He had crossed his legs and was doubled over. He looked miserably around, wondering how he was going to get to his room on the other side of the house.
Ginny chose that moment to stick her head out of the door. "James, put some clothes on, there's a window!" Ginny then felt another bout of indigestion coming on and disappeared back behind the door.
As if the situation couldn't get any worse for James, it did. The bathroom that he frequented was in the hall that crossed the front door. At this moment, James saw a figure approach the door and he froze. The mystery person knocked and James watched in horror as his ten year old sister skipped to the door to open it.
"Lily! Lily, no! Don't open the door!" James called to his sister. Lily, being too oblivious and out of it due to her own food poisoning, to look up and only looked over her shoulders. Satisfied that no one said anything, she pulled the door open.
At the last second, James found a conveniently placed plant and dived behind it. He looked over toward his father's study and saw Harry, leaning in his chair, a look of absolute amusement on his face.
"You are just loving this, aren't you?" James hissed.
"There is a lesson in this you know," Harry noted.
James shot his father a glare and listened to who was at the door.
"Hey Lily, is James home?" It was the voice of none other than Charlotte, the neighbor girl James was in love with. And she was asking for him.
"I haven't seen him, so I think he's with his friends," Lily answered.
James' heart stopped beating. How could she say that? The fiend! She was trying to soil this perfect opportunity for James and Charlotte to come together in a cornucopia of love.
"Actually, I'm right here!" James jumped up from behind the plant and in the middle of the hall. "Hey, Charlotte, how's it going?" James heard his father choke bak a laugh and it didn't occur to him as to why until he saw Charlotte's face.
She was horrified, to say the least. Her face had gone pale and her mouth was hanging open. James' gorgeous smile began to fade when he felt the wind from outside blow through the still open door...between his legs.
James took a deep, spastic breath. He dared not look down. He had to try something, but his mind was too numb to think of anything.
"Why don't you try using your sweet and seductive voice!" Harry called loudly from his chair so that Charlotte could hear.
James turned a bright red and Charlotte turned ten shades darker.
"Bye," was all she mustered before darting out the door.
James watched her run as fast as her legs could carry. He didn't want to watch her leave, but Lily was too busy laughing at James' nakedness that she didn't notice the door needed shutting. Like it mattered. James found his feet and ability to move after Charlotte disappeared from view. He hung his head in defeat and trudged back to his room. He pulled clothes onto his body. He wasn't even sure if they were clean or not, but he didn't care.
Once clothed, James felt a pity party was appropriate and crashed on his bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. He wasn't sure how long he was staring when someone knocked on his door.
"Oh good, you're clothed," Harry said, entering without permission.
"Why?" James finally said after five minutes. "You just had to make it worse."
"I didn't do anything. That was all you."
"Me? How was that me?" James felt himself fill with anger.
"You were standing in the middle of that hall for 20 minutes without clothes. You had plenty of time to avoid such a fate. You could have even stayed behind the plant I provided for you. You did neither." Harry explained.
James pouted. His father was right. He had every chance in the world and he blew it. "So what exactly am I supposed to pull from this?"
"Nothing will ever go your way if you just stand around and do nothing," Harry said. He felt it was the best advice he could give anyone. "You know, the teen mind is a short one. Give it a week or so and write her a letter or invite her to tea or something."
"Dad, I can't do that!" James cried.
"Why not? It's not like your going to be naked while doing it," Harry felt that it was this moment was the one to walk out of the room.
James pondered his father's words for a brief second before tossing it aside. What a load of hogwash. Something that wasn't hogwash was revenge and James had the perfect idea to get back at his father. He just may wake up tomorrow morning and find his knickers in the freezer!
James felt an evil laugh was appropriate, so he laughed.
AN: this chapter's inspirations: Chuck Criss for the Holidays. Leave a review!
