30 Day OT3 Challenge - Merlin/Salazar/Godric - Ours

Rating: Teen

Summary: A compilation of 30 important moments in Merlin's, Salazar's, and Godric's romantic life.


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Day 4: Doubts

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Love is a roller coaster; one that can only be trusted when you find the right person. Salazar has always craved love; has always craved the feeling of intimacy that comes with the feeling.

With Merlin and Godric, he had finally obtained the one thing he wanted more than anything. Now, though, he was confused.

Was it normal for three people to enter into a relationship? Was it normal for a person to feel more than friendship for more than one person? Was it normal to crave the sensations only these two people could instill within him?

With every passing day, he could feel himself fighting against the constant stream of doubts that plagued him. With every passing moment, he could feel his will slowly being destroyed.

He loves Godric. He loves Merlin. He knows this.

The question is; why can't his mind accept that? Why is he forced to endure such thoughts? Why is he forced to think about whether or not he's good enough for his lovers?

He's falling; the doubts slowly enveloping him within their icy holds. He wants to trust his lovers; wants to believe that they love him just as much as he loves them, but it's hard.

What if he's doing what he's always done? What if he's lying to himself and they leave him broken? What if he's pushed into a despair so heart-wrenching that he can't recover?

He needs Godric. He needs Merlin. The question is: Do they need him?

Closing his eyes, he attempts to fight off the loneliness that holds him captive. Both of his mates are tending to different matters and he's left alone in his manor, working on potions that can help the wizarding world.

The silence is getting to him; pulling him deeper and deeper into the black abyss of self-doubt. He's drowning; his screams going unheard by everyone.

Slowly, Salazar disappears into the abyss, the only remaining piece of him being his finger. It is only through sheer luck that Godric's voice rings throughout the room, pulling him back to the surface abruptly.

The knight seems confused when Salazar runs to him and hugs him tightly, but doesn't say anything. Instead, he holds him tightly within his arms, whispering sweet nothings in his ears. Later, when Merlin returns home, he joins in on the hug, joining the struggle to make Salazar feel safe and loved.

Later, when all three of them lay in bed, cuddled up to one another, Salazar tells them both he loves them. They return the sentiments and kiss him chastely, making a promise that their love would last forever.

Even then, that wasn't enough. The doubt was still there; the abyss simply bidding its time for the opportune moment to strike. For now, though, Salazar was alright. When that time came, he would fight it.

His mates loved him and he loved them. What more could he ask for?


Day 4 - Prompt 4 - Complete

Word Count: 487