It's half past five in the morning now, and I'm lying in my bed at Hexham house, tossing and turning and quite unable to sleep. I always sleep here when I'm in London. In fact, looking over the house and ordering any necessary repairs is usually part of my business in London.

I'm alone in the house, I never bring any servants or open it up. Peter seldom opens it up either. A big house that is empty most of the year really seems like a waste, but Peter won't hear of selling it, and off course it is convenient both for him and me to have a bed here when we are in London.

I've set the alarm at 9, then I will get dressed and pack my last things before I go out to have breakfast at a café. After that I will catch the twelve o'clock, as I told Edith. And then I go back to Brancaster.

But I know I have to meet Edith again very soon. So I know I have to go back to London soon. Or else I will go mad...

...

It has been a remarkable night.

...

After Sam was sent away with the finished pages, Audrey went to fix some new coffee. Edith and I sank down on the big leather sofa together. We were sitting quite a bit apart, but I put my right leg over my left and she put her left leg over her right, so our feet were very much closer than we had dared to put our behinds.

I wonder if she did that on purpose - I certainly did. I fiddled with the idea of touching her foot with my shoe, but in the end I didn't do it. It didn't seem a very romantic thing to do - I'd much rather put my arm around her - and also I was afraid of scaring her away.

I love Edith. I love her and I think that she at least likes me. But I know I don't have much to offer - I should probably give her up altogether, but I can't. And I don't want to. Not until she tells me to leave her alone, and I don't want that to happen any time soon.

I'd better not push my luck. So I just smiled at her.

"Well, you did it", I said.

"We did it", she said. "I really am so grateful."

That sounded good, I had managed to be of help to her. Perfect!

"Are you an editor now? Does this count in your profession as a sort of baptism of blood?" I asked.

"I don't know what will happen next. But it's nice to know I can do it if I have to."

"You certainly can." And yes, she had been very impressive that night, the way she had handled it all.

"I won't though. Not yet. I'll put someone in charge as a caretaker. Then I'll think."

So, if she decides to live in London and edit the magazine herself? Could that fit in with my life? If we marry?

"In the end, the question must be are you a country woman or a townie," I said.

I had to know, because - well - I am definitely a country man. But if I could have her I think I would be willing to change even that.

"It's more than that", she said simply. "I know now I need a purpose. That's what I've learned. I can't just lead one of those purposeless lives."

That is wonderful, too. Do I love her? Yes! Perhaps I should tell her? No, not yet.

"You inspire me", I said instead.

That was when it started to get odd.

"Not many people would say that", she said with an embarrassed smile. What had given a resourceful woman like her such low self esteem, I wondered.

"They would if they knew you", I told her. Then we looked at each other in silence and I knew I just had to kiss her and tell her what a wonderful woman I think she is.

Just then Audrey came back with the coffee and the spell was broken, which was perhaps as well. We talked a little more while we had our coffee, then her taxi arrived and she and Audrey went off in it and I walked home to Hexham house.

...

It seems impossible to sleep tonight. I heard somewhere that you need less sleep when you have just fallen in love, so perhaps that explains it. You need less sleep when you are in love or when you have a new baby, even as a father. I guess that is another kind of love.

I don't know what got me thinking about babies - or, well - off course I do.


AN: Thank you for reading! Thank you for the lovely reviews! I still want to finish all my stories, hope you want to keep reading!

...

I rewatched the scenes from the night at the magazine and noticed that there were two men there in addition to Bertie. So it is a little AU to only have Sam and Audrey in this story. I won't change it, though.