Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note.

A/N: Slow-publishing fic is slow-publishing!


Light POV

In retrospect, it was probably impolite of me to hit him so hard across the face that he actually fell backwards, but, in all fairness, he had tried to engage me in a lengthy conversation about ant rights.

Regardless, he didn't call the police, opting instead to simply kick me as hard as I had hit him, and then we went about our business.

My business being to collapse onto the mattress and pass out.

Sadly, my plan was waylaid by the fact that Ryuuzaki couldn't be quiet for a consecutive twenty seconds, which I was sure would be enough for me to fall asleep at this point. I hadn't known it was possible to eat sugar cubes so loudly. Apparently it was.

What was really impressive was his ability to read loudly. Sighing, I opened one eye and peered at him. He was perched on our treacherous chair, somehow managing to not send it toppling over despite the fact that I, with my normal sitting, usually had trouble with it. He was, however, causing it to creak, and he read so fast that the almost-constant flip of pages was actually annoying.

I looked at my watch- the only timekeeping object in the entire apartment. Midnight. This had to stop.

So, calmly, I sat up.

"Ryuuzaki?"

"Oh, Light-kun. You are still awake?"

"Yeah. Look. I need you to stop making noise, okay? Just let me get one full night of sleep."

"If Light-kun is such a light sleeper, perhaps it was unwise of him to acquire a roommate."

I was sleep-deprived. That is how I justify my next action. Because I would have to be unbearably exhausted, starved, and stressed out to do what I did.

Which was burst into tears.

His eyes went wide... well, wider... and he stared at me. "Light-kun?" He actually sounded concerned, too, which made me cry harder. Why was I such an asshole? This man couldn't help being so socially awkward and physically repulsive. I really should take it easy on him... but I just despised him so much...

"Light-kun, I do not understand why you are crying," he said gently, setting his book down, pushing aside his plate of sugar cubes, and uncurling himself from his chair, slouching over to me. "What is the matter?"

"I hate you so much, but I'm broke and I'll be homeless if I kick you out," I wept.

To his credit, he didn't look offended that I had just blatantly told him I hated him, nor did he look particularly surprised.

"Well, Light-kun, what can I do to be less irritating to you?"

"Wait... really?"

"Certainly. It is not like I irritate you on purpose."

I blinked at him.

"Um... okay. Then... can you... just make absolutely no noise for maybe five minutes? Just until I get to sleep?"

"Of course."

Suspicious but willing to accept the unlikely in light of the situation, I dropped down onto my mattress, slammed my eyes shut, and made the best possible use of the five minutes.

I was out in less than two.