AN: I just wanted to thank you guys again for the kind reviews! I really appreciate them, and they're what keep me writing! (Besides Rami's beautiful face, of course.) Anyway, onto the story!
"Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love." ― Rainer Maria Rilke
It was just a walk. Something simple, something that friends did. But it still managed to send me into a whirlwind of mixed emotions, some pleasant and some not so pleasant. On one side, I was absolutely giddy with delight. He'd asked me to take a walk with him; that was good, right? But the other side of me, the bigger and the more cautious side, was telling me to stay far away if I knew what was good for me. It told me that I shouldn't get to close, that I shouldn't involve myself further into him. There was a battle coming up, the odds weren't in our favor, and if I lost him, I'd be absolutely devastated.
I couldn't find me it in me to deny him, especially when he smiled at me like that. I grudgingly followed him out the door, ignoring the knowing smirk that Emmett sent me. He'd get it when I got back, and I'd make damn well sure of it.
We didn't make a sound at first. The two of us walked in silence, Benjamin seemingly comfortable and carefree while I was the epitome of uncomfortable. See, my name meant steel, and for the most part, I lived up to that name. I was tough, cold, and brutal. I could kill someone with little to no remorse at all. But when it came to this boy, my apparent mate, the steel crumbled and broke as if it were glass, shattering to his feet.
I despised it.
"So, what was your motive?" I questioned.
Benjamin looked over at me, looking confused. "What do you mean by my motive?"
"Well, you didn't drag me out here just to count the leaves on the damn ground." I replied, crossing my arms. I knew that I was acting a bit like a child who wasn't getting their way, but at the moment, I couldn't give a shit less. Half of me wanted to be here, and half of me didn't. I was a complete and utter mess, and this man was the cause.
The corners of his lips lifted up into an amused smile. "No, I didn't. You're correct about that." I waited for something else, but he didn't reply.
I grew impatient. "You didn't answer my fucking question, shit for brains."
"And what question was that?" He hummed a reply. The perfect picture of innocence, but I could see through this facade.
"The fucking question that I keep fucking asking you, Sherlock, but you keep avoiding!" Okay, just because I could see through it, that didn't mean that I could control my anger. Another thing that you'll quickly learn about me is how horrible my temper is.
"And that question would be..?"
I growled, and suddenly his back hit a tree, a dent made in the bark. One hand was pressed on his shoulder, the other on the bark, hovering above his other shoulder. I was close to his face, snarling a reply. "What the fuck did you bring me out here for!?"
The surprise was evident on his face. He certainly hadn't expected me to go all out and attack him like that. But I had an easily ignitable temper, something I'd never learned to tame, even after all of these decades of being alive. "I brought you out here to discuss what's going on between us." He replied once he'd gained his composure.
"What's going on between us?" I repeated, stepping back from him, releasing him from my iron grip. "What's going on between us." I reiterated it, but this time it was more of a statemnt of disbelief than an actual question. "You really want to know what's going on between us? Fine, I'll tell you what's going on between us. I found my fucking mate in some guy that may very well die in a few days time because the whiny little piano playing prick couldn't keep it in his fucking pants! I've got to not only protect you, but I have to put my ass on the line for a bunch of people that I really don't know, nor give a shit about!" I didn't stop, though I knew that I'd gone over and above where I needed to go. "And don't even get me started on that fucking fight. I don't even want to be there with you, because, if you guys haven't fucking noticed, Aro isn't exactly lacking in supporters. They're going to side with him, and we're going to fucking lose! And the worst part about this all is that I'm not even concerned with my own well being- I'm more concerned with yours!" I jabbed an accusing finger into his chest. "I'm a selfish fucking person, Benjamin. I'm cold, ruthless, I'm made of fucking steel. I kill people with barely any remorse whatsoever. But you... You had to change all of that. This fucking mating shit had to change all of that."
There was a pause. Benjamin didn't speak, and all I did was pant softly. Looking back on it, releasing all of my pent up anger on him was kind of foolish, and hell, I'd be lying to myself if I said that I wasn't embarrassed by my actions. But Benjamin didn't laugh, he didn't even do that boyish little smirk that he had. He just nodded his head. "I understand what you mean. I know exactly what you're feeling. You seem to forget that I've found my mate too, and I'll do whatever it takes to protect you. You know that Carlisle will avoid a fight at all costs, and if a fight happens, then so be it. We've got incredibly gifted people on our side. Sure, Aro has Jane, and he has Alec. But what is that against our strength? He has numbers, but we have passion, we have drive, we have the true power."
"Passion and drive aren't anything against what he has." I interjected, running a hand through my dark hair, frustrated. "Don't you see? You're talking about Jane as if her powers are something that we shouldn't fear. She can take any one of us down in a matter of seconds, Benjamin. The only one who stands a chance is Bella, because of her newborn strength and her shield. Alec is even worse than Jane. He can take away our senses. What use are our gifts then?"
"You're looking at this in the wrong way." Benjamin replied, still the perfect picture of calm, while I was stressing out over every little detail of the fight. I liked to believe that I was well prepared. My coven members liked to say that I was too uptight. "Look, Bella is a shield. That means that she can project her gift onto us, and stop Jane from doing anything to us. Your power is wonderful, Stalina. You have to understand that. You can throw her across the clearing if you tried hard enough."
"But my gift doesn't work on people." I replied, my eyes downcast. Part of me believed he was right, but there was still that doubtful, cautious side of me that refused to put my hopes in something that wasn't absolutely concrete.
"You don't know that for sure." He countered, though his voice was soft and understanding. "Look at me." I didn't comply, arms crossed stubbornly. "Stalina, look at me." He gingerly took my chin in his hand, tilting my head up for me. "I'm not going to let anything happen to you, and nothing is going to happen to me. I promise you that I'll live, and that you'll live as well. Alright?"
I nodded my head slowly, eyes fluttering shut for a moment as I looked down, before they opened once more as I looked back up at him. "Alright."
"Come on, lovebirds!" Emmett called from a distance away. Benjamin looked past me, loweirng his hand from my chin as I turned around to face Emmett. "We've got a bonfire to attend!" He grinned mischeviously at me, waving his hand. I scowled at him, making him boom with laughter as he walked away with his wife.
"I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close." ― Pablo Neruda
