She's such a tease… inviting me as her date to a double date… flirting heavy with me… stealing my breath than ruining it all… And she's still so irresistible to me… Every adorable smile makes me want to brush my hair back behind my ears and blush until my face explodes from the heat… makes me want to pull her into my arms, despite her discomfort, and hug her until… until my heart can breathe again on its own without her having to be the reason it beats faithfully… One day I'm going to regret writing all this, but it's fun to go back for the memories…
"Either they're watching the Batman or they're getting giggity!" *Na, Na, Na, Na, Na, Na~*
Chapter 4: Attitude
I could almost say I didn't need section dividers for this chapter, but seeing that I live with and love this Bat, I know he has two in particular. He doesn't change when he's with certain people; he doesn't change if he's in a certain place; he doesn't change during certain events…
No. The man who acts like the sun to my world, the one that I revolve around no matter how unwillingly, changes with his outfit. You could call him bipolar or say he suffered from multiple personality disorder (even though there's only two personalities), but Batman and Bruce are nothing alike, at least to me, which is why I believe people will never figure out that they're the same person. In my opinion, he's the best actor that's ever walked the land, between those discovered and those not.
Batman
Because I'm saving the best for last, I want to get the one identity that I hate most out of the way. I honestly have nothing against Batman, but I prefer him without the cowl and cape. This section is about the… I don't want to say 'beast that lives within him', but that's the only way I can describe the Dark Knight without sitting down to hardcore think about it.
On the battlefield with the team, with me or just briefing us all on the mission, he isn't too much different. His mood lightens and darkens with my appearance in his picture frames, but that doesn't affect his attitude all too much. Enough rambling though. Let's just get what you need for your research papers or why ever you're reading this.
On the field… Batman is a monster. He's not the kind of monster you grow up thinking is always going to be slumbering under your bed and in your closet behind your clothes during the day that comes out only at night to munch on your face, giving you horrible acne.
No, he's the kind of monster your mom brings home after she divorces your real dad who tries to become your new dad by being friendly to you and trying to love you three times more than you needed from anyone who's actually related to you and he never gives up until he and your mother get it on and bring you a new brother after which he starts working every night and going away on long business trips so you have to take over to help your mom raise your new brother.
Reading that, you probably disagree with every last little word, but let me explain the confusing explanation.
By saying he's a step-dad, I mean he's just a change from what you're used to. When one thinks of a dad, one customarily thinks of a man who's supposed to love his children, kiss them goodnight, drive them to their friends' houses on the weekend, teach them how to hunt and fish, watch scary movies with them in the dark and stuff like that. Now, replace 'dad' with 'hero'. Heroes are supposed to be happy, kind, caring and all that stereotypical stuff you read about in the comics. Batman isn't 'happy' or bright. No, Batman is similar to a ninja fart: silent and deadly.
By saying he's 'friendly'… Well, Batman is not friendly. He's intimidating in all aspects of the word. The only time he's actually 'friendly' is either when I'm involved or some child younger than 10. His suit isn't adorable-proof. (I just realized I called myself adorable. Don't deny that you just wanna pick me up and hug me until I'm a pancake! It's not self-absorbed if you guys agree!)
By saying he never gives up, I mean just that. The saying "stubborn as a mule" should be updated to "stubborn as Batman" because once that man has made his mind, he's made it and nothing will change that. Being "The World's Greatest Detective", he follows every clue to its grave; every hunch to its birthplace; every suspect to their breaking point. Even after everyone else had last their last breath of hope, he was still hungrily feeding from his IV, energy pumping eagerly through his bloody veins straight to his over-abused heart.
I'm not sure what I really meant by the new brother. Maybe I meant me. Before Batman 'saved me' if you would, he was a lone hero and the others had grown to it just being the Caped Crusader. When I came along, I stole him away, replacing their beloved Dark Knight with a Dynamic Duo who only showed half of the time the regular Detective ever did. And my mom getting giggity with him probably referred to how life screwed her and dad over because it wasn't until after they died that Batman was left with little bothersome me.
On the whole business trips, I mean just that. As the pull-ups commercial famously sings, "I'm a big kid now!" so he's slowly going back to leading the League with Superman serving at his side. I still see him time-to-time in cape and cowl, but I'm mostly stuck with 'mom', who's either Black Canary, Red Tornado or Kaldur.
On a lighter note, I should mention the good parts to Batman…
He works hard and long, seemingly putting the lives of innocent strangers above his own every day as he risks the life he so delicately pieced together for those whose names he'll probably never learn. He fights hard and rough, never letting his flame die out until the Dementor-like teasing seductions of unconsciousness suck the life straight from his lips. Ha, look at me, all poetic! TAKE THAT MRS. WHALEN! I AM GOOD AT POETRY!
In times of crisis and fear, he can hold a strong and brave face that can dry a few tears from any one's eyes, no matter how chicken they are at heart. In the greatest of panics, all he has to do is play lion and let out a mighty roar and all of us zebra out on the plains immediately shut up and hide behind one another in fear of being eaten.
Bruce Wayne
And now the best act is waiting behind the curtain, eager to perform. Aw, here I go, my words all musical! Why can't I feel this way in school? Bruce is better known for being a Playboy billionaire and the main beneficiary of Wayne Tech, giving out free scholarships to deserving kids and for having adopted the 'sole survivor of the Grayson accident' back in 2007.
I know Bruce as my surrogate father and my guardian so my views of him are probably a bit more… oh damn, what's the word? Starts with a b… means I see him differently than the rest of the world… biased! That's the word… I'm more biased of him, and in the good way… sometimes.
First let's get the bad out of the way so I can end on a good note.
Being in charge of a huge corporation and scarred from a bad past, I never see Bruce. He's always away on business and sometimes, at least from what I've overheard Alfred and Bruce discuss under their breath when they think I'm asleep, he leaves just because he doesn't want to smother me… Smother? He'd actually have to get close to smother me!
Seeing that with the simplest addition of a cowl he's suddenly the Dark Knight, he drills me just as hard as Batman would. The only muscles I can sprain with Bruce though are the ones coiled up in my head that throb with the worst of migraines and headaches any single soul could imagine. When any of my grades fall below an A, I'm suddenly Hitler's Jewish best friend. He hates me, but he can't kill me because of what I mean to him.
Those are the only two 'bad' things I can think of. Now, here's some praise for my dearest… 'daddy'…
I was just a stranger to him when we agreed to let me live in his home. I was nothing but a broken heart who he agreed to save. He had never before known my face, never before learnt my name nor had he ever exchanged a single word with me… When he heard my heartbroken sobs, he gained his guardian angel wings and took me into a place where I'd have a chance to be safe from all things that could ever possibly harm me.
Without his black cape, Bruce has the best smile the world has yet to be aware of. No matter how bad I want to run away and rejoin the circus, all he has to do is smirk at me with his arms over his chest, giving me that "you don't have the balls!" look and I cave in. I do have the balls, but where would I go? Wally wouldn't let me live with him and I'm pretty sure the old trailer was repainted by now. I definitely don't want to risk an orphanage stay. After watching Annie, I've been scarred. The thought of having to sing every day with a bunch of dirty kids doesn't appeal to me in the slightest.
On those rare nights he actually is home, he acts just like a regular father. I'll walk in and he'll be reading the paper. He'll calmly fold it, set it down and ask about my day, seriously interested in what happened in the part of my life spent with my eyes shown to the world. When I ask for space, he gives it; when I want company, he's there. If at dinner, I want to sit by him and talk like a chick would do, he's at my side and listening in a moment.
Most dads are either heavy alcoholics, abusive or just don't care in the slightest, but Bruce isn't an average dad. I've only seen him touch alcohol once and that was at some office party; it was only wine too so I imagine his drinking days are past. As shy as he is, Bruce has never laid a harmful finger on me intentionally and I doubt he ever will if he's in the right state of mind. He always cares, between the hatred in his eyes or the swelling of pride in his heart that pokes out like a boner through his shirt. (Just kidding on the boner part. That'd be pretty nasty. Having a chest dick? Where would it even come out? Would it be like, right over your heart? Out of your belly button?)
See? Told you I'd end on a happy note.
What's next?
-F.J.
