Hello! I feel like I owe you an explanation for being a week behind with this chapter. I intended to update last Sunday because I was going away and didn't want to leave you hanging, but I didn't have the time to upload and check before posting so I put it on a memory stick and wanted to bring it with me...but I forgot. I just got home yesterday so this is as soon as it can be. My apologies, anyhow I hope you'll still find enjoyment reading this unfortunate chapter that I had to rewrite three times because I couldn't get it right. Sigh!
It doesn't come as a surprise when Dan returns to an empty apartment. He is exhausted beyond explanation so his first and only destination is his bed. He plops down tiredly and tries to gather his experiences from the day. Beside mundane activities he can't think of anything interesting. Well there is one thing, one girl to be exact. What's her name, Selena? No, Serena, he thinks. He didn't get much from their twenty second long encounter but she seems likeable, she is quite pretty too. The realization that he has an attraction to what seems like a normal girl appalls him. That's a first. His choice in women is colorful; they're different every time, from bohemian to hippie, rock star, crazy colored hair, no hair at all! Never normal though. He should probably give it time, they all seem normal at first. Besides he knows better than to fall for the first girl he meets in New York. He's sure there's a lot more to it than Barbie-blonde hair and shimmering tanned skin (no matter how attractive it seems). This girl Serena, she has her demons too, he's sure of it. We all do.
So far New York has been exhausting, exasperating to be exact. Something must be terribly wrong with him. He is young meaning he should like the crowd, love the city that never sleeps, fit right in. Every 18 year old person dreams of coming to New York and making it big. He already has that, he doesn't have to work in order to make it, he has the money and the status and somehow it feels awful. He doesn't feel comfortable with the luxury he is surrounded by every day because it's someone else's money. Dan Humphrey is a lot of things; you can call him rude, eccentric, dramatic and you'd be right, but one thing you can't call him is unappreciative.
He isn't sleepy at all anymore so he grabs his leather scribbling pad and writes with a black sharpie
Things I must do before I die
Write a bestseller
Prove that I can succeed without my father's help
End poverty
Find true love
He laughs out loud at the last thing on the list. He rips the paper out from the pad and makes a scrunched up ball of it. He should really go to sleep.
Blair sits still even though on the inside she feels like grabbing him and shaking him by his shoulders. She tries to start a conversation twice. First time she asks how the dinner went, he answers with fine. The second time around she tries to be more direct with Can we talk about it? His answer is No need.
It bothers her because he always tells her everything. Not once since they've known each other has there been an awkward silence around them, not once has he refused to talk to her. She is desperate to get a reaction out of him and by the looks of it, the only way to achieve that is to take away the drink he's so occupied with.
''What the hell?'' he mutters as she snags his glass away and keeps it close to her.
''You're not getting it back until you talk to me.'' Her voice sounds tortured and tired.
''We're talking now.'' His response is so presumptuous it makes her want to punch his arrogant face.
''You know what-'' she angrily pushes his glass towards him and gets up from the bar stool ''-why do I even bother.''
It finally hits him just how much he needs her there when she is about to leave. Without thinking he grabs her upper arm, desperate to stop her.
''No, wait-'' he breathes out ''-I'm sorry, please don't go.''
She is hesitant so he tries again. ''Please Blair, just stay with me?''
Any other day she would obey, however not tonight.
Her lips form a straight line, her brows furrow and she shakes his hand off of her.
''I don't think I want to.''
She looks right in to his eyes before going away. She hopes to catch a glimpse of disappointment or something, anything to show that he cares. In the end she is the disappointed one as he gives her no emotion whatsoever. He just sits there, blatantly staring at her for a moment. Then he turns away and returns to his drink as if nothing happened.
It takes all the strength he has left not to get up and go after her again. It hits him just how pathetic he is, seeking for comfort from her because her best friend a.k.a. his girlfriend put him in this mood. He figures he should save the last of both their dignities so when she gets up to leave the second time he doesn't bother to go after her. What's the point? She won't listen. She doesn't care and why would she? He is nothing to her but an old childhood friend who turned in to a drinking buddy and he is okay with that, for now at least.
What is wrong with you? She thinks to herself as hot tears start to prickle around her eyes. She is mad, no, furious with herself. She is not the one to cry over a guy, especially a guy who she isn't even in a relationship with for god's sake. Nate can pull of a lot of things, being an indecisive bastard is the newest on the list.
She walks pass her driver who now has a concerned look on his face. He runs after her, asking what's going on.
''I need to walk this off.'' She says as if it explains everything and continues marching angrily, the heels of her Louboutins clacking loudly against the cold pavement.
''But Miss Waldorf, it's pass midnight, New York is no place for-''
''I said I'll walk.'' She sends him a warning glare so that he finally backs off, she is aware that the car will follow her anyways but even that is better than having her driver personally escort her home.
She needs time to clear her head, get her priorities straight. She's thankful there's no school tomorrow so it won't hurt to stay out extra longer to think things trough. Not that it matters, almost every senior in Constance has it easy this semester. Everyone knows which Ivy League college they're destined to attend this fall and the school and the teachers are basically handing out A's like it's Christmas morning, anything to get their girls what they've ''worked so hard'' for.
Her phone buzzes signalizing an incoming call. A little part of her hopes it's Nate- not that she'd answer- but a bigger part wishes is isn't him which will help that pinch of guilt she felt for turning her back on him disappear so much easier.
She feels relieved when she finds that the caller is Serena, and then nauseated for some reason. She takes a few breaths before sliding to answer.
''Hey S, what's up?'' she tries to sound as casual as possible. There isn't an answer at first, she hears a slight snort and knows how bad it is. Whatever happened at that dinner was shit because Serena doesn't cry for no reason. She usually keeps it all in for as long as she can, she wonders what burst her bubble.
''Um hey-'' the blonde says suddenly feeling insecure, maybe she shouldn't have called, at least not until she got her act together. She thinks about hanging up but knowing Blair and her persistent nature it's better to talk right away. ''-I'm home from my dinner with the Archibalds.''
Blair nods even though Serena can't see her. I know, she whispers to herself.
''Yes, how did that go?'' clueless, act clueless Blair.
''Horrible-'' Serena can't keep it in any longer and breaks in to tears. Blair winces slightly and feels a pang of guilt spread through her system.
She can't relate personally because the Archibalds were always very generous and nice with her. Still, from what Nate told her they can be very unwelcoming and snotty, looks like Serena got to witness that tonight.
''I'm sorry, but hey give it time, I'm sure that his parents will realize how great you really are and come around-'' she says sincerely. At situations like this they usually go to each other's house and stay overnight, she is about to suggest it before Serena cuts her off.
''No, it's not his parents, they were fine. It's Nate-'' she pauses for a moment and exhales loudly ''-I have no idea what got in to him. Or maybe it was me, I don't know. But something is wrong and I don't know how much longer I can do this.''
Blair stops in her tracks, mouth wide open. Staying overnight at Serena's doesn't seem like a good idea anymore. She knew it! She knew he messed something up from the minute she saw him earlier today. What the hell did he do? It concerns her and intrigues her at the same time, she wants so badly to know what happened but it's not her place to ask.
''Blair? Say something?'' Serena says insecurely from the other side of the line, her voice is barely a whisper. Blair starts walking again, she picks up a pace and clears her mind quickly, she wants to help, she really does but words won't cross the altar of her mouth.
''Yes, um-'' she feels incredibly doltish, this is the first time ever that she's at a lack of words with Serena ''-I'm sure Nate will come around too.'' She says lamely repeating herself. Serena notices something is off with her and reacts to it immediately.
''What about you, is everything okay with you?'' she asks with evident concern, just like a real friend should. Blair scolds herself for being so absent-minded.
''Yes-'' she murmurs quietly as she is now entering her house. She steps into the elevator, relieved that no one's following her anymore. ''-I'm just-I had a long day and all, I hung out with Chuck-'' she decides to leave out the Nate part of it all and laughs nervously ''-you know how it is with him.''
''Oh my God-'' her friend cringes at the thought ''-please tell me you didn't go there, Blair that is awful.''
Blair is thankful that they're no longer talking about Nate, she laughs at Serena's reaction and rolls her eyes to herself. ''What exactly do you think we did?''
Serena giggles in to the phone ''I don't know, do I want to know?''
''We had a few drinks-'' Blair insists with a grin of her own ''-and that's all there's ever going to be.''
''Yeah, not like it ever happened before.'' Serena smiles knowingly, she never stopped teasing Blair after what she likes to call ''The Blair and Chuck limo fiasco'' that happened last year on Chuck's birthday. She isn't even sure if they slept together, she just knows she got in to that limo with him, didn't return 'till sunrise and both of them refused to ever talk about it. Everyone just assumes they hooked up because it seems like the most reasonable explanation. Besides it wouldn't be the first time for Blair to have a random hookup, behavior that Serena didn't approve off but could do nothing against.
''Let's not even go there.'' Blair says closing the topic. She quietly climbs up the stairs to her bedroom. She plans to throw herself a bubbly bath even though it's almost two in the morning and then maybe watch Breakfast at Tiffany's. She's not going to get any sleep tonight anyways. She slowly turns the knob to her room and enters locking the door after her. Dorota has a habit of letting herself in early on Sundays and serving her breakfast in bed, Blair wants to skip that today. She notices right away that there's dim light in the room, she probably left her nightstand lamp on by accident. She turns around, ready to dive in to her heavenly bed and stops dead in tracks. Her heart drops to her heels as she sees a figure sitting on the edge of her four poster bed.
''Nate?''
There you go! I'm trying really hard to make this as interesting as possible. I hope you like it so far. So please leave a review, you have no idea how rewarding it is to read all of your lovely comments. I promise I'll do my best to get the next chapter up ASAP. Till next update, xoL
