"I'll be there. I promise," Flash said softly over a red cell phone. She sighed as he ended the call. She leaned against the wall before slipping down to sit on the floor. She rubbed his brow tiredly. He looked over toward the television transmitting static. She had forgotten to pay the cable bill again. Why did she pay for cable again? She was barely in his apartment anymore. When she wasn't being a hero she was... Being a hero. Perhaps a sense of normalcy?
She couldn't even date! A flighty girl was usually a cheater and therefore, not a keeper. And as a girl there was more name slandering than if she were the man she pretended to be in the red suit. How was that normal? It wasn't. Other female heroes had their contest for the "studly" male heroes. Even if she were to tell the male populace she was lacking male genitalia, they would still have to pass the all knowing Batman, his "children" , and an angry red colored archer.
She sighed again, before standing up on her own two feet. Dating can be worried about later.
She slipped her mask over her face, throwing a smile on while she was at it. She coughed before tapping on her communicator, "Flash to Watchtower."
"So you'll help me?" Superman asked Green Arrow. There was no question about it, none of the founders were going to help him set Flash up on a date with the sensible red-head he had met at Bruce's party. And given Flash's surprisingly stubborn nature he needed help. That alone was weird given Flash was such a flirt.
"Let me get this straight... You want Flash... To date Wally?" Green Arrow questioned. He was glad he forgot his coffee now. He was sure he would be choking otherwise. Choking was already unpleasant. Choking on a hot drink was even more so.
"She's got a good head on her shoulders. I think it'll help Flash focus if he has someone worth fighting for. Green Arrow snorted thinking about it. Not that it was a bad idea. That's how it was with Barry and Iris.
"What makes you think Flash wants to date?" he asked ignoring Superman calling Flash a boy. He never really thought Superman was that dense.
"He's been flirting with every girl on the watchtower."
Green Arrow rolled his eyes. Damn flirtatious adopted niece of his.
"I'm not helping you," he said walking away trying not to laugh at Super-oblivious-man. Wally dating Wally. Contrary to popular belief Flash was not narcissistic. Flash seemed to avoid people that acted like her in a romantic way.
Superman flew in front of Green Arrow to try and make him reconsider.
"Please Oliver. This would be good for Flash."
"...Fine."
"You owe me Ollie," Wally growled as she was dolled up. Her dress too big for her as Oliver had only guessed her sizes. Oliver grinned sheepishly at her.
"Don't worry, it's not like Clark will be there."
"Oliver! Of course he will be there! He wants to see his plan work! And in case you didn't notice Ollie, I am not two people!" she hissed.
"I know. But Superman wouldn't leave me alone! Besides, you just need to make sure the date doesn't work and you will never be in this situation again."
"And how do you purpose I do that?"
"Wally, meet your date," he said gesturing to a curtain. She raised a brow before doubling over with laughter. Tears began to stream down her cheeks.
"Shut up. This is not funny West."
"Why Roy! I never knew you were such a fan of my work!"
"Who knew you couldn't pull off a red dress!"
"Shut up! Ollie ordered it dollop head!"
Roy gave Oliver a look.
"How were you able... Never mind. I probably don't want to know."
"No you probably don't."
Two days later Superman saw Flash zipping around the watch tower with a huge grin on his face.
"Flash," Superman hailed causing the scarlet speedster to stop.
"Yeah big blue?" Flash asked keeping the dopy grin.
"How'd your date go last night?" he asked knowingly.
"Okay, but we weren't for each other."
Superman flew in front of the famed Scarlet Speedster.
"What did you do Flash?"
"Why do you assume I did something?"
Superman raised a knowing brow. Flash sighed, knowing the big blue Boy Scout wanted answers and would act like the reporter he is to find answers. It was scary when he channeled his inner Lois. Flash inwardly shuddered imaging if that ever happened again.
"Right. Well, I just don't think I can take a girl who's snark rival's the Great Clot Pole Roy."
And Flash couldn't. It would be like dating Roy, or if they were smart, herself. And god help the world if that happened. Batman might actually kill someone.
"Clot Pole?"
"Yup."
"Well, she seemed like a perfectly pleasant and approachable girl when I met her."
Flash held back a laugh. Was this what John and Shay were talking about? About misleading appearances? Perfectly pleasant? She could be nice but it was more likely to find her being overly sarcastic to the point of sounding stupid.
"Well Big Blue," Flash began with a grin rivaling the Joker, "Didn't you meet her at one of Bat's parties?"
"Yes."
"There's the problem. Too much pressure in an unknown situation. That's all."
"Shut up Ollie!" Roy roared. Oliver just kept his shit eating grin, holding a saucy red dress. The same one Wally was supposed to wear on her date.
"Aw, come on. It was cute."
"You are sick Queen. You know that," he grumbled. Oliver just waved his hand like he was trying to get away a foul odor.
"Bah. Funny is funny. And you wearing the dress was absolute brilliance."
"Shut up!"
"I can't believe it fit you better than Wally!" Oliver laughed hysterically. Roy growled at his adoptive father. Somewhere along the line of making fun of the horribly fitting dress, Roy commented that he could make it look better. So in a bizarre turn of events, he was consoled into modeling it for them. Well, he looked better than Wally did.
So he became Miss Wally West and she became Mr. William East. He didn't blame Wally for this, though she didn't help the matter. No. He blamed Oliver. And he was going to pay. He knew those glitter bomb arrows would one day come in handy.
Hi. Been a while hasn't it? Well, I wanted to see Superman try and get Wally and Flash together so, who better to play a red hear than another red head? And thus, somehow turned into Roy in a dress and a girl Wally in a suit. Well, despite what it is, I hope you all enjoyed this installment and review.
Oh, and the insults are not mine. Who can guess what show they came from?
