Thank you for reading! this is the last chapter :)


Killian barely slept that night. He tossed and turned in bed, reliving Emma's kiss every time he closed his eyes. By the time dawn broke, he got up and fetched himself a cup of tea and tried to bring some order to his frazzled mind.

He needed to tell Emma the truth.

She would hate him, that much Killian knew. From what he'd seen of Emma, and the little he pieced together from Anna's excessive talking, she was someone that wouldn't trust easily to begin with. To have betrayed the little trust she might have put on him, it was something Killian didn't expect to be forgiven for. He needed to tell her the truth, not for him - he knew he stood no chance with her - but so she wouldn't go around beating herself and thinking she'd betrayed her sister.

He knew he couldn't do that to her.

He was entertaining those thoughts when his phone rang. The message delivered on the other side made his blood ran cold.

Elsa was awake.

/-/

He made his way towards Elsa's room, his heart beating frantically in his chest, the words already forming in his head on how his apology should look like.

But it all vanished in one heartbeat as Anna and Ingrid pulled him into a hug and redirected him over Elsa's bed. From the corner of his eye, he could see Emma's shoulders stiffen when she noticed him, but he couldn't say anything before Ingrid spoke.

"And here's Killian!"

Elsa gave him a small, polite, smile before she tilted her head in confusion. "Who?"

"Your fiancé," Ingrid said with a beaming smile.

Elsa's eyes widened comically and Killian felt his heart skip a beat. "My what?"

Here it is, he thought as he prepared for the downfall. But as he was about to open his mouth, his hand raised in a universal I can explain motion, Anna's gasp interrupted him.

"Oh no! She has amnesia." Her hand covered her mouth in horror and Killian was so astonished that he couldn't react before the entire family started spinning the same tale. He moved away from the bed as he gave space to Ingrid and Anna to talk to Elsa.

He noticed Emma moving towards the exit and he walks towards her.

"Emma…" he trailed off, forcing his hand not to reach for her.

She barely looked at him, her green eyes filled with shame. "Not right now, Killian. I need to get the doctor," she whispered before she quickly exited the room.

/-/

It took over an hour for the doctor's to check up on Elsa's vitals and have a few more tests done, all of them confirming that there wasn't any logical explanation for her amnesia, but that sometimes patients waking up from a coma could be a little disoriented.

Ingrid had insisted that they leave Killian and Elsa together, giving them time to talk to one another and perhaps Killian's words could trigger her memories.

He tried to refuse but he couldn't find the will to say anything when Ingrid looked at him with such hope in her face. When they all had left the room, leaving him and Elsa alone, Killian sighed and ran his hand through his hair before he turned around and gave Elsa a soft smile.

"May I?" He pointed at the chair near her bed and she nodded.

"I have to say, I do feel like I know you, but I just can pinpoint from where." She tilted her head, studying him.

"You see me each morning when you take the train," he offered politely and his heart gave a little jump of joy when her face lit with recognition.

"You work on the token booth!"

"Aye, I do."

He wasn't sure what else to say, and it seemed Elsa didn't either, so the silence stretched between them. It was Elsa who finally broke it.

"Look, please don't take this wrong," she started hesitantly, fidgeting with the blanket of her bed. "But I am not - I cannot be in love with you."

For months he'd hoped a different answer from her, fully aware that this probably would have been the one he'd gotten. For months he'd thought it would break his heart and made him feel even less worthy of anything in life.

And yet…

"I - I know." The corner of his lips curved in a sad smile. "Terrible job, one hand, I'm really not a catch-"

Her hand was soft and slightly cold - yet comforting - as she rested it on top of his. "No, that came wrong." There was a sincere streak in her voice and her eyes were looking at him with anything but kindness. "That was not what I meant and I apologize if that was it seemed I was implying. The truth is, I could have not given you my heart you when-"

She hesitated, looking for the appropriate words, but Killian didn't need words as he could read in her eyes exactly what she meant.

"When you've already given it to someone else?" he ventured.

She tilted her head amazed. "How do you know?"

"Well, it's clear now." He shrugged, his eyes boring sincerely into hers. "The cold look in your eyes whenever you came to the station, how distant you've been of your family. They mentioned that you pull away from them a few months ago and Emma was sure you've had your heart broken. She-she misses you, you know?" He couldn't prevent the last bit to escape his lips.

Elsa's eyes widened in surprise. "Emma doesn't really talk that much to - well - anyone."

He shook his head in disbelief. Emma had been right all along.

And he'd been an utter fool.

/-/

Their conversation had moved to other topics after that, with Killian retelling Elsa the events of the week she'd missed and trying to encourage her to confide in her family again. She was laughing at his tale of Christmas shenanigans when Ingrid, Emma and Anna came back.

"I see that you've been getting reacquainted with each other," Ingrid said, almost beaming at the two of them but Killian only had eyes for Emma. She looked at him longingly for a brief minute, before she averted her eyes and plastered a smile on her face. One that didn't quite reach her eyes.

And in that moment, he knew.

Killian cleared his throat and looked at Ingrid. "I'm in love with your daughter."

He felt Elsa stiffen on her bed and Emma's smile faltering before she schooled her features.

"Yes, we know you're in love with Elsa." Ingrid sounded confused and Killian took a deep breath.

"Your other daughter," he confessed.

Ingrid widened her eyes. "Anna?" she blurted out.

"Emma." He said her name as a whisper, a plea, as if the world began and ended with her. Because at some point during that week, he'd fallen in love with her. Emma's eyes were fixated on him and he could see both hope and a reticence of getting her sister hurt. He sighed, knowing he could fix the second thing, but it would cost him the first. It would cost him Emma. And there was nothing he could do about it.

He averted his eyes, ashamed of himself, and focused them on Elsa. ""I lied. I never - I've always watched you on the platform, so confident and fierce. But I never dared to talk to you. After all, I'm just a one-handed clerk with no family and no future. You - you seemed to have so much. I didn't know how to talk to you. When they brought us you here after your accident, they wouldn't let me see you and somehow, someone misinterpreted my words and thought we were engaged." His eyes shifted for a brief second to Ingrid and he could see the realization in her face. "I wanted to set the record straight, I did. But then Ingrid showed up and-" he sighed, running his hand through his hair as he stood up. "You have a lovely gift in your family, lass. And all of you have a wonderful gift in the fact that you've found each other." He turned to Ingrid and he could see the tears in her face. "Loneliness is a funny thing. I creeps up in you. It makes you go mad with ache for things that seem normal to others. When all of you showed me kindness and welcomed me, I just couldn't walk away from what I've been yearning from years - a family. I was weak."

He shrugged on his coat and started to walk away. "There is no excuse for what I've done, as I've managed to broke your confidence and hurt your feelings." His eyes darted from Elsa to Ingrid. "I'm sorry. I don't expect you to forgive me, but I had to say my apologies anyway."

Finally, he made it to Emma's side. Her eyes were filled with tears and disappointment and it broke his heart. "I'm sorry, Emma." He tried to reach for her, but she took a step away and averted her eyes. "You- you deserved so much better than me," he finished before he walked away, tears coming to his own eyes.

/-/

It was only a week later that Killian found himself at his booth, another book tucked beneath his left arm as he collected token after token. It was a day like any other day, but it was also different.

"I can't believe is your last day," Tink said as she reached to give him half a hug from behind on her way to her break. "Belle is so excited to have someone helping her out on the bookstore. I'm so glad it worked out so quickly."

"Me too," Killian smiled. "Thank you, Tink, for - for everything."

"Happy to help!" she beamed at him before she left the booth.

He went back to his book, and was lost in the story he was reading when her voice reached him.

"We came to live with Ingrid when I was fifteen - almost sixteen - and August was a few days away of turning seventeen."

Killian lifted his head to find Emma looking shyly at him, her fingers toying with a token. She was a vision in her grey beanie and red leather jacket. Her eyes met his briefly before they focused again on the token. "It took me a while to believe her, to believe that she meant well, that she was not going to send us away. We all have our scars, you know. I ran, August used to invent these concocted stories about us being fairytale characters trapped in this world, Anna tried so hard to bond with everyone, Elsa used to keep to herself. I was so scared to be cast aside again that I did a few really stupid things." She took a deep breath before her eyes found his. Killian simply looked at her mesmerized. "I got an older boyfriend, got into some troubles, ended up pregnant at seventeen. So, when time came and Elsa went to college, I went to labor. She went to law school, I tried to finish my GDE while raising Henry and working two shifts at a local dinner. Elsa graduated with honors and got snatched away to work at the DA's office. I barely took a few community college classes and started working bailbonds. She got a lovely apartment with a view and state of the art furniture. I got a half-destroyed house that I slowly rebuilt with August and Ingrid's help. Elsa gets asked to collaborate overseas on major cases. I leave Henry with Ingrid when I have a stake out late at night. And not once, not even once, I've envied her. I've never, ever, coveted anything from her, any of things she'd gotten and I didn't." There was a softness in her voice as she slid the token into his space, her finger brushing his, sending a jolt of electricity all over him. "That is, until I met you."

He was out of the booth and gathering in her arms in record time. Killian held on tighter as she embraced him, repeating the same words as a mantra. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

"You should have told me."

"I didn't know how." He pulled away enough so he could meet her eyes. "Emma, can you forgive me?" He pleaded.

Her lips curved into a smirk. "You've already met my crazy family and you actually like them. That's a huge mark in the pro column"

Killian chuckled, allowing himself to reach and caress her cheek. "Aye, I do, even if they might not think highly of me at the moment."

"Are you kidding me? Ingrid threatened to disown me if I didn't come after you." Her fingers reached to caress the nape of his neck. "You should know by now that she'd never leave a stray behind. You're one of us now." She bit her lower lip and cocked an eyebrow at him.

"Emma, I-"

"Shut up and kiss me, Killian."

(He did. And it was the first of the many kisses he planned to give her.)