It felt like his whole life had been nothing but a series of shitty mistakes since the dead had risen, but the last couple of weeks had definitely been the worst. Lori was dead, Glenn and Maggie had been abducted by a madman, they suddenly had a motherless infant to care for and now Daryl was gone, too. Rick tried to console himself with the fact that at least they'd gotten Glenn and Maggie back from the Governor, but somehow even that was a paltry compensation, all things considered.

The horror of Lori's death was still preying on his mind constantly, and the hallucinations he was having about her were driving him out of his mind. But the thing most painful and devastating at that moment was that Daryl was gone. He had been Rick's anchor in an increasingly mad world this winter, and the only person he had wanted around him since Lori's death. Not that he'd done such a good job of showing the other man that…

Rick didn't blame Daryl for sticking with his brother, even if that brother was Merle. He wondered if maybe Daryl had also wanted to get away because Rick kept hurting him. Whatever it was, Rick thought as he walked through the underbrush, he was gone.

And suddenly there was chaos. Guns were being fired, people were yelling. Rick dropped to the ground returning the fire.

He'd almost become used to these crises, acted on autopilot now. It seemed like the attack lasted a long time but all Rick could feel was numbness. Until suddenly, there was Daryl by his side. With him came Merle, but Rick hardly minded, he was so relieved to see his man.

When it was all over and they had made their way back into the prison courtyard, dispatching walkers from the van that had broken through the fence as they went, Rick unsurprisingly felt less blasé about Merle being back.

He was already dreading the discussions he'd have to have with the others. There would be a lot of talking, and a lot of anger. But Rick knew only one thing for certain at that moment, and that was that he would not let Daryl leave again.

Carl unlocked the upper gate for them, and Rick could see Carol holding her gun at the ready. Glenn, scowling, stood close by the entrance to their block.

Rick turned to Merle, meaning to straighten out a few rules before they even got inside, but his eyes were instead drawn to Daryl, who had fallen back. He was off to one side, about to disappear round a corner of the cell block. Rick had a feeling he knew what that was about, and decided immediately that Daryl had to be the priority.

Rick looked at Carol, Carl and Glenn, then motioned at Merle. "Get him inside. And lock him in until I get back."

He waited for Carol to nod and Glenn to move towards Merle, then turned and hurried towards where Daryl had disappeared. When he could see around the corner he spotted Daryl not far away, bent double. As Rick was making his way over the other man sank to his knees. Rick could see that he was shaking. He walked over and crouched down next to Daryl, who was being violently sick.

Rick's heart was heavy. Daryl had been so unwell, it had become a constant worry for them all, and it seemed to be getting worse. Rick had talked to Hershel but the old man had said there was nothing much they could do.

"The stress we're under is making it worse, and Daryl puts a lot of extra pressure on himself. But I can't see either of those things changing anytime soon. Best we can do is get him the medication, and make sure he takes it. And keep him safe when he's having an attack."

Rick was committed to all of these things, but it wasn't easy. The sickness wasn't even the main issue, though it had started to take its toll. Daryl looked gaunt and fragile now even when he was not in pain. It was the complete shutdown that was the real issue. If an attack hit him out in the open Daryl would be completely helpless, and in great danger. Rick still got the shivers when he thought about what could have happened when Daryl came out to look for him after Rick had broken his leg.

Daryl now seemed to be having difficulties staying on his knees. He was still heaving and was pressing both hands to his stomach. Rick took hold of him and kept him steady. He put one hand lightly on Daryl's neck in support and could feel a fierce heat under his skin.

Eventually the spasms subsided. Rick scooted closer and dropped to one knee, and Daryl slumped into him. He was shivering despite the warm sun, and moaning quietly. He clutched Rick's arms and buried his face against Rick's shirt. Rick held him gently, trying to shield him from the blinding light with his body. He could feel the other man's heart racing.

They stayed like this for a few minutes, Rick giving Daryl time to get his breath back. His hand had started automatically stroking Daryl's neck in small, slow circles and kept this up until he could feel the other man quieten down.

Still holding Daryl close, keeping him shielded from the light, Rick finally asked, "Shall we try and get you inside?" He felt Daryl nod against his chest.

Rick helped Daryl to his feet, then stopped for him to get used to being upright when he could feel the other man tensing against him.

"Keep your eyes closed. I've got you."

It took them a frustratingly long time to get inside. Daryl was uncoordinated and clumsy, and he leaned on Rick more and more heavily. Rick got him back into the same cell they'd spent the night in after Lori had died. Merle stared at them from the cell Glenn and Carol had put him in but didn't say anything. His glance was strange; Rick thought he almost looked with pity at his brother. He was sure Merle would later give him an earful about it all.

In the cell he started to get Daryl settled. Carol, who had seen them come in, brought the already familiar wet cloth, basin and a glass of water. Daryl's pills were on the table where he'd left them. Rick sighed. His man wasn't doing himself any favors by acting like he didn't need help.

He held Daryl back when the other man moved towards the bed. "You are soaked in sweat, and you got puke on yourself. Let's get you out of that stuff, man."

Rick looked at Carol, who nodded. "All right if I get some clean clothes from your cell?" Daryl made a small noise of assent and Carol vanished.

In here, with the light dimmed by the blanket over the entrance hi pain seemed to have subsided somewhat. Rick sat Daryl down on the bunk, shook a couple of pills from the bottle and handed them to the other man with the glass of water. Daryl swallowed the pills and Rick put the glass back on the table.

"You didn't bring any one these when we left for Woodbury, did you?" Daryl shook his head and looked down. "You need to keep these on you at all times. If you're out there like this you won't last a day."

Daryl wouldn't look at him. Rick sat down on the bunk next to him. "Look, I know it sucks. All of this sucks. But I need you to take better care of yourself. If you don't then I'll worry. Daryl, you are too important to me, I need you by my side to get through this."

Now Daryl looked up, and there were tears in his eyes. Rick had to swallow hard, he felt like crying himself. He enfolded Daryl in an embrace and the other man clung to him like he was drowning.

"'m sorry, Rick. Sorry I went off with Merle, and sorry 'm not here for you. I'll do better, I'll look after myself, I swear…"

Through a gap in the blanket Rick saw Carol hovering just outside the door. He gently disentangled himself from Daryl without letting go of him completely. He looked at his man. Daryl's eyes were unusually large and shiny in his pale face, and Rick felt a powerful mix of emotions. He wanted nothing more than have this man by his side. He wanted to protect him, but also have Daryl protect him. Rick pulled him close again, and felt a couple of tears run down his own face. Then he got off the bed and went over to collect Daryl's things from Carol.

He helped Daryl out of his soiled clothes and into a fresh shirt, not commenting, as usual, on Daryl preventing him from seeing his back. Rick had his own ideas about that, but now was definitely not the time to even allude to it.

The headache must definitely be better now, Daryl was moving less like in a trance. But he looked exhausted, and even though it was the middle of the day Rick knew that sleep would be the best thing for him. When Daryl lay down on the bed Rick crouched next to him for a moment. Daryl looked at him with tenderness again.

"Don't throw Merle out. He's not as bad as y'all think."

Rick smiled. "I promise I won't, but I do need to have a talk with him. If he wants to stay he'll have to follow the rules."

Daryl nodded. His eyes were already starting to fall shut.

Rick brushed a strand of hair off Daryl's forehead and gently kissed him on the brow. "You sleep now. We'll talk later."

"Thanks, man. F'everything…" Daryl's voice was hardly more than a whisper now.

When he was sure Daryl was asleep Rick straightened up and walked out of the cell. He had some serious talking to do with several people.