Marcus grumbled, when he came to he realised he was in a dark, dank space. The area was made of stone with rusting iron metal bars keeping them from exiting. He sat himself up and gave a loud groan and began to prod the Jester with great emphasis.

'Hey, hey wake up!" Marcus said in a high whisper as he began to shake the Jester rigorously. 'This is all your fault do you here? Yours, not mine and yours! You better use your time whatever knowledge to get us out of here or so help me God!'

The Time Lord gave a loud groan and slowly began to set himself up, rubbing his eyes he stared up at Marcus with a blank face.

'Morning' he said with that same cheeky grin and chirpy voice he would use back on the TARDIS, this was met with a slap across the back of the head from Marcus. 'Ouch!' He yelped, 'what was that for?'

'Wear a suit you said, it will be fine you said. Why did you tell me to wear that blasted thing if you admitted yourself you didn't know what the world was going to be like? Marcus eyed him with intent, he tried to look fierce but it obviously didn't work because the Jester merely shrugged.

'I like suits' he said simply.

Marcus, exasperated put his head in his hands, the clear sign of distress must have alerted the Jester because he promptly jumped to his feet and with all the vim and vigour he most often had he began to tap his head furiously thinking of a plan.

'Right then! He began. We are trapped, yes? Iron bars, simple but effective. I don't seem to have regeneration energy balls with me so that presents a problem. He capped his head again furiously, 'Marcus dear boy, you don't happen to have any particular talents I have been hitherto unaware of, do?'

Marcus pondered this. It wasn't as if people paid attention to what he was interested in all good at back at the village, he only remembered his talents or rather interests in astronomy, art and... Marcus was sure there was another thing, something he was missing but when he tried to remember the memory was merely replaced with the odd black spots that is childhood memories had seemingly been replaced with, 'sorry no' he said hanging his humour head a little. He still didn't know why the Time Lord had chosen him, he imagined that if he chose a companion they would be handsome and versatile, intelligent and strong. Not like Marcus, not like the boy nobody wanted.

Are you a He was about to dwell on the problem further but he was interrupted by a Kytraxian guard opening the door to his cell. He appeared to be an older version of the ones Marcus had seen in the club, large and numerous battle scars decorated his back and chest and where as the others had adopted the futuristic guns that seemed to be commonplace on Mars in 2045, this Cyclops brandished simply a stone club.

'Get dressed' it grumbled throwing down some tattered grey trousers and a half torn T-shirt. They looked like they had been worn already but the two captives did not argue, simply did what they were told. The monster smiled, 'you're lucky' he said, 'get to work on the tool that's going to bring glory to the Kytraxians.' He led them out of the cell. Marcus turned to look at the Jester. He was smiling.

'What on earth have you got to be smiling about?' Marcus whispered, though in truth he had come to expect this kind of behaviour from his apparent senior though you wouldn't guess it by the way they acted. The Jester merely continued smiling and pointed upwards. When Marcus looked he was astounded by what he saw. There was a giant metal pillar, something clearly that was not meant to accompany such primitive surroundings. And part way through this pillar was a bright purple energy that almost forced Marcus to look away due to the brightness. Upon re-looking at the floor Marcus saw little baby Cyclops monsters identical to those in the book being placed into the beam and emerging as the veiny, ugly warrior creatures that seemed to be littered all over Mars.

They stopped in a line of grim looking, emaciated humans and the guard handed them a pick axe. 'You must dig' it said before simply turning around and walking away.

'Not a very imaginative name, is it?' the Jester quipped forcing Marcus to smile, upon seeing that he had brightened up his day a little the Jester winked at him. 'I have a plan' he whispered and pointed to a guard who was feeling his way around the wall. On closer inspection Marcus could see that he had no eye, he was completely blind.

'You're going to have to flirt with him.'

'What?'

'He is blind, isn't he?' He must have low self-esteem.'

'I don't think you can apply the same rules to Cyclops as you do to human teenagers' Marcus tried to remind him, though the announcement fell on deaf ears.

'I'll dig' said the Time Lord, 'you flirt.'

As the alien resumed digging, Marcus cleared his throat. Slowly stepping up to the Cyclops guard he began to speak. 'H-Hello' he said in his most feminine voice possible which, to his shock was actually quite feminine indeed. The guard stopped and turned around.

'Who's there? The monster grumbled sniffing the air above the Human's head.

'It's me.' Marcus fumbled around his brain for a name. He remembered from history class that Cyclops were monsters from the Greek myth and the similarities between the Kytraxian and actual Cyclops were too numerous. 'It's me... Aphrodite.'

'Oh.' the huge Kytraxian blushed. 'Haven't heard you around here before, you sound pretty… My name's Hyperion' he said with a bow.

'Such a manly name.' Marcus continued, 'and my oh my you have such muscles. Very strong indeed, I like men to be able to carry me over the threshold.' The Jester suppressed a giggle and began to consider that Marcus was very good at chatting up male gendered things, even if they were ugly Cyclops abominations.

'Hyperion' Marcus said softly, still in his feminine voice, 'I am so lonely, I'm new to The Dig and grow swiftly bored. Those humans you put to work earlier look like interesting playthings, I desire them.'

Without question Hyperion stomped over and untied Marcus and the Jester. Upon doing so the jester held out his hand, a large golden glow enveloped it and from another room his regeneration energy juggling balls returned swiftly to his palm. 'Basically…Run.'

They did. Ducking beneath the legs of Hyperion as the other alerted guards came stomping after them. The jester managed to send one of them tumbling into a wall by throwing one of his energy balls at its foot and tripping him up.

'You can't keep doing that forever!' Marcus yelped, running 'your life force!'

'I'll worry about me!' The Jester replied back, 'you worry about the fact that we're about to run head first into a stone wall!' He was right. within seconds they had to come to a screeching halt. A flat wall of stone prevented them from going any further. The pair heard the stomps of the Cyclops come around the corner.

'There they are!' Said one Kytraxian

'I'll grind their bones into salad dressing!' Said the other.

They both came charging down the corridor roaring and throwing saliva in all directions. Marcus and the Jester looked at each other, said there silent goodbyes and clenched their eyes shut.

It was then that a vision appeared before Marcus.

It was a vision of a marble palace, and then a vision of him, if slightly more muscular holding a bronze spear and a bronze shield dressed in golden armour with a red brush like ornament on the top of the helmet. In the vision, he thrusted forward with a spear and then his eyes shot open. The monsters looked scared, like lost puppies wanting a home. The Jester on the other hand had an expression of complete awe on his face.

'I… Didn't know you spoke Greek.' Fumbled the Jester. 'That's… That's good going that is, well done!' He clapped his hands vigorously, Marcus just looked confused.

'What?'

'The thing you just did with the thing… And the yelling… And the gods and the incantations, bloody hell Marcus! It's like you remember a past life or something.'

'Really?' Marcus said.

'Well… No, that unscientific nonsense simply won't do while I'm around, but whatever it was was really really cool. It looks like the Doctors got a case and a half on his hands when we find him.'

'Speaking of which' Marcus enquired suddenly being reminded of the entire point of the mission. Isn't the whole point of this trip to find his Mrs?'

'Good point' the Jester said, 'it seems likw a dead-end however, odd… It's unlike my TARDIS to lie.

'Lets keep loo-' before Marcus could finish his sentence. The aliens that had been previously disturbed by his odd, foreign outburst had regained their composure and picked the Time Lord and his companion up into their hands, squeezing them rather too tightly for comfort.

'So… You want to go see the human women do you?' Asked one.

'I think we should take them to her.' Said the other, 'she's all chained up and battered, but it'll be good company for our stowaways… Leave them to starve just like that wench. They laughed and dragged the two non-Kytraxian's to a cave on the outskirts of the main platform. It was exactly the same as the others with one exception. On the left-hand wall with her legs and arms both chained was a woman with blonde, frizzy hair dark skin and the most beautiful pair of grey eyes both men had seen.

'It's the woman from the picture!' Marcus said excitedly. They were both slammed the floor.

'Who are you? Said the woman in chains.

'No' the jester began, dusting himself off and getting to his feet. 'Not the right time to ask that question.' He smiled. 'Who are you?'

'Dr River Song, archaeologist… Not that any business of yours' she scoffed.

'How rude!' Marcus said, affronted.

The Jester laughed, 'quite feisty aren't we Dr Song? It's not yet time for questions unfortunately. All you need to know is that we need to help you… And you need to help us.

Thanks to all who have been reading, I hope you are enjoying my story. You Guys Rock!