In front of Shrek stood a hefty group of knights armed with the finest weaponry, standing a good distance from him. Aggron Stonebreaker was behind Shrek, wiping off the blood that splashed onto him as he was eagerly waiting to power up Shrek. One of the knights spoke out to the ogres,

"We have direct orders from Lord Farquaad to place you under arrest! Do not make any sudden movements, or we will be forced to use lethal force! If you just keep your hands-"

Shrek didn't budge an inch from the knight's request. Before the knight could finish, Shrek intervened,

"So, Lord Farquaad sent you to apprehend us? Say we just stand right here, then what? Are you gonna throw us in a trial then execute us on behalf of your lord?" Shrek said, taunting the knights.

"Listen here, ogres! This is your last warning; submit and-"

Shrek cut off the knight again, narrowing his eyes and donning a sadistic grin.

"No, no, no, let me tell you something," Shrek said as he flattened his palm to reveal the onions in his hand. "Onions and ogres have a lot in common. Onions have layers. Ogres, like my friend and I, have layers. Now, what do you usually do with onions?" Shrek said before starting to skillfully peel away the onions with one hand. "You peel the layers back, again and again, to see what's underneath. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad. But, if you have a bad onion…" Shrek snapped his fingers, signaling Aggron Stonebreaker to deliver the first cast of bloodlust.

"…you shouldn't peel away many layers," Shrek said with a deeper voice, as he begun to grow bigger and smellier; doubling up. The knights looked up at Shrek, quivering in their tin cans' worth of armor.

"Because you won't be happy with what you find! Unless, you're happy with discovering…" Shrek continued to speak, as more doses of bloodlust were being funneled into him. Each cast of bloodlust, Shrek took a step forward, and listed an attribute of a bad onion to get the point across the knights.

"A vile…"

"Repulsive…"

"Monstrous thing with no more layers protecting it!"

All the bloodlust magic was starting to go to Shrek's head as he threw the onions down his throat and swallowed them whole. He was approximately fifty feet tall as his voice became quite deep and terrifying. To complement his large size, Shrek suddenly developed an unquenchable thirst for violence…

"The ogre's going to kill us all! Abort, abort!" The knights pleaded as they dropped their weapons and started to flee. Aggron Stonebreaker looked off to the side and saw the fleeing knights, and decided that they weren't going to live to see another day. Grabbing a small glass vial full of highly flammable and sticky chemicals, he tossed it in the air and batted it directly at the knights. The vial broke and splashed the burning liquids onto those in the back of the pack. Normally, one small vial wouldn't be enough to douse all the knights in an agonizing, sticky coating of burning chemicals, but who said anything about using only one?

"Oh ho! Again!" The left head of Aggron said, upon a secondary vial leaping up to be in a perfect position to be batted at the group of knights. It was batted farther to the right to further bog down the group.

"And again!" The right head cried out in joy as a third vial took the place of the second; launching to the left of the group. And to top off the Ogre Magi's dumb but brilliant luck,

"And another one!" Both heads cried as a fourth and final vial jumped in the air to be knocked to the head of the group. Every knight in the pack was now drenched in the burning chemicals; being greatly slowed from the pain as they were cooked in their suits of armor. It gave Shrek enough time to catch up and deal with the knights.

"OGRE SMASH!" Bellowed Shrek while raising his right foot high and holding it for just a moment, before bringing it down to the ground and sending an extremely powerful shockwave through the ground. Dozens of pieces of cobbling were shaken loose as the shockwave traveled in all directions. Most of the knights lost their footing and face planted onto the dirty road, while the rest were thrown into the air and came down harder. Now with the pack of knights halted, Shrek raised his left foot and brought it down as hard as he could on the downed knights, turning all of them into a wretched pulp. Sharp pieces of metal cut into Shrek's putrid ogre flesh, forcing out a traumatizing scream that fell on all the ears present in Duloc. To add insult to injury, Aggron Stonebreaker commented on the knight-pulp while fueling Shrek's state,

"That had to hurt." "I almost feel bad."

Not far from where Shrek and Aggron were, there stood an arena packed with spectators watching a similar number of knights stand before Lord Farquaad, not yet hearing the cry of Shrek.

"Glorious knights! Here you shall test your strength and decide which of you shall be my champion to bring me my fiancé! Oh, but do not fear! There-"

Shrek's cry swept across all present in the arena, causing an unsettling wave of silence to settle in afterwards. Farquaad's speech was shoved to the bottom of his priority list.

"Barnes, what was that?" Farquaad said as he turned and whispered to one of the knights on his side.

"I…I don't want to know…"

Farquaad was angry at Barnes not knowing what that awful noise was. Since there was absolutely no way he was going to get up and figure it out, he proposed a new plan for his knights.

"Okay everyone! Change of plans! Whoever finds out whatever that noise was, and if it was a Fairy-Tale Freak, kills it, will become my champion! Now, I know that some of you may die, but it is a sacrifice that-"

Farquaad's second statement was interrupted. This time it wasn't a fear-inducing scream of pain, it was the very ground rattling underneath the footsteps of Shrek. Deep earthquake-like thumps could be heard by everyone. Farquaad grew even more stressed.

"Gah! Look, will someone please just go out there and see what is going on?" Farquaad ordered to the knights in the arena, as the thumps grew louder and rattling. They looked at each other in dismay under their helmets before turning around to do their duty of serving Lord Farquaad. As they started to leave, a tall shadow was cast over the knights. They looked up, and saw the last thing they would see.

A gargantuan, shirtless, rank ogre peered over the stone gate of the arena and looked down at the knights. Stained yellow teeth covered in thick, greasy saliva could be made out from his partially open and smiling mouth. Sickening greenish-yellow liquid glowed as it coursed through his veiny muscles and eyes. The unmistakable stench of rotten onions radiated from his revolting skin. Shrek laughed at the back of his throat as he opened his mouth,

"Hey now, you're a ROCKSTAR." Shrek bleated, before pushing the stone formation over the gate to the arena out of his way, causing dozens of man-sized chunks of rocks to shoot forward and tumble down on the arena. Some of the knights and a handful of spectators were crushed from the falling debris. The arena was now cleared for Shrek to wander through. On Shrek's back was Aggron Stonebreaker, laughing without a care in the world as they rode on Shrek's shoulder, oblivious to the demise of everything around them.

Lord Farquaad's expression was that of utmost, genuine shock and awe as the archers took aim with their crossbows, hoping to subdue the pair of ogres now before it was too late.