Hey, I'm a liar. I said that it would be a while before I updated, with finals week and whatnot. But I had time, and I really don't want to study (but I will any way).
So here's the next chapter all early! Consider it a holiday gift from me to you.
Oh! I have 9 reviews now. Okay, so people have reviewed more than once….but still! 9! That's so cool!
As usual, R&R. They make me happier than you will ever know.
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"Alright. Operation: Stalker is about to commence," I declared loudly to myself, as there was no one else in my room. At least, I hope there was no one else in my room….
Anyway, I got dressed in a pair of blue skinny jeans and a black T-shirt. I decided that the totally awesome coat would be too hard to move around in. And I was going to be doing a lot of moving around, with the ninja stalking and whatnot.
"Let the stalking begin!" I shouted, opening my door.
A Study in the Members of Organization 13
Number 1: Xemnas
I honestly don't know why or how this man is the leader of Organization 13 – he doesn't do anything! Stalking him was one of the most boring things I had ever done. Basically, I hid behind a corner and watched him talk to Kingdom Hearts. You know, he always talks dramatically. Always. Like, when he says "Kingdom Hearts," he says, "Kiiiinnngdoooommm Heeeaaarrttssss." He's an odd breed. I wouldn't want to be alone in a room with him.
…Well, technically, I was when I stalked him, but he didn't know I was there, so I don't think that counts.
So, my conclusion? Status: Boring. Interests: Monologue-ing. Dangerous?: Very. Watch out for his monologues.
Number 2: Xigbar
Xigbar is a lazy son of bitch. Seriously, the guy teleports if he has to walk more than two feet (very hard to follow). He also has very good hearing and doesn't hesitate to shoot the shit out of something. Here's what happened: I was using my totally awesome ninja skills when my klutziness made its reappearance. I tripped over my feet and fell on the floor with a muffled "thump". I scrambled to get behind a couch that was near me before Xigbar turned around (and succeeded, might I add). Xigbar turned around, and I was crouched behind the couch, really hoping that he wouldn't come back there. Well, he didn't. Instead, he summoned his arrow guns and started firing away at the couch. The bullets/arrows/whatever barely missed me! I could have died!
Conclusion – Status: Lazy jerk. Label: Pirate. Dangerous?: Uh, I almost got shot! Multiple times! So, yes, I should say so.
Number 3: Xaldin
He went on a mission, so I followed him, but there were lots of heartless everywhere. SO, I pulled a Demyx and ran away. Results of Xaldin are inconclusive until further notice.
Number 4: Vexen
His lab is so fun! It's full of blinking lights and glowy stuff. Except there was also a bunch of papers with math and equations and stuff like that, which made me a little sick (I'm allergic to algebra). But Vexen himself is pretty creepy. First of all, his hair looks like it hasn't been washed since he became a Nobody (or longer). And his eyes look like they can stare into your soooouuuulll! Well, not really, but they're still really creepy. He's also muttering to himself constantly, and I couldn't hear all of what he was saying. It was probably really creepy anyway. He spends most of his time in his lab, and, if his lab wasn't so cool looking, I would have been bored. I hid behind a giant computer and tried to spy on him, but I kept getting distracted by the pretty lights. I stared at them for a little while, and when I looked back towards Vexen, he was gone.
Conclusion – Status: Creepy. Sanity Level: Very Low. Dangerous?: If he fights me in his lab, yes. Shiny things!
Number 5: Lexaeus
Lexaeus just…sits there. Staring. So I just…sat there. Staring. At him. But I was hidden, with my stalking ninja skills. And it was boring. Even more boring than watching Mansex. At least he talked.
Concluded – Status: Impossibly Dull. Label: Statue. Dangerous?: I'm really not sure…
Number 6: Zexion
Zexion also just…sits there. But he reads, which is less worrisome than Lexaeus's staring. But, still, I was really bored as I was spying on him, at least until I learned something: it is impossible to spy on Zexion. I was hidden behind a bookshelf when Zexion, without even looking up from his book, called, "Why are you hiding behind a bookshelf, Observer?"
I jumped and cursed silently. I knew I was caught, so I quickly came up with a new plan.
"No one's hiding behind this bookshelf," I called back convincingly.
"Then who is talking to me?"
I mentally cursed again. Damn, he was a smart one. That move would have worked on Demyx.
"Um, I am...a ghost! Yes, I am the ghost of books whose titles begin with the letter…" I peered at the books on the shelf next to me. '…R! Yes, beware, for I am a ghost, and definitely not Rixia!"
"I know you are there, Observer, so you might as well come out now," Zexion responded boredly. I pouted before walking over to the table he was sitting at and collapsing in the chair across from him. My eyes narrowed as I demanded, "How did you know I was there?"
"I smelled you," he replied, and I slapped my forehead. Of course. I forgot.
"Why do you call me 'Observer'?" I asked idly, and he glanced up from his book to look at me oddly.
"That is your title," he replied, looking back to his book.
"Exactly!" I held up my finger in an 'aha!' gesture. "It's my title, not my name. I'm going to call you Zexion instead of Number 6, so you should call me Rix. Or even Rixia would be better than Observer."
"I will not call you anything other than Observer. Calling you something else would imply that we were friends, which we are not."
"D'ya wanna be?"
"Want to be what?"
"Friends."
"No."
I blinked at his blunt (and rude) response. "Why not?"
"Because you are very annoying."
I grinned evilly. "Oh, you have no idea how annoying I can be," I said mischievously. I leaned forward in my chair and stared at Zexion intently. "I'm going to keep annoying you until you call me by my name. Please call me Rixia."
"No." "Please?" "No." "Please?" Zexion didn't answer – he was probably trying to ignore me. Well, it wasn't going to work! "Please? Please? Pretty please? Pretty please with a cherry on top?" I scowled furiously. How dare he ignore me?
"-"
"Alright!" Zexion finally looked up from his book. "If you will stop doing that, I will call you Rixia. Are you happy now?"
"Quite." I smirked and leaned back in my chair, basking in my victory. Zexion sighed and started reading again. We sat in silence for a couple of minutes before I got bored.
"Hey, Zexion?"
"What is it, Observer?" Zexion looked at me boredly. I narrowed my eyes at him and he sighed before correcting himself. "What is it, Rixia?"
"Can I see your Lexicon?" Instead of getting that excited child like Demyx, Zexion just responded with a blunt, "no."
"Pleasepleasepleaseplea-"
"Fine!" Zexion, looking quite irritated, summoned his book and I looked at it eagerly before groaning. "Aw, even yours is cooler than mine." I looked at Zexion excitedly. "Can I play with it?"
"Certainly not."
I wilted slightly before brightening again. "Hey, can I call you Zexy?"
I think he said no, because the next thing I knew, I was in the hallway outside the library. Who knew Zexion was that strong?
So, what do I conclude? – Status: I like him. IQ Level: High. Dangerous?: Hell, no. We're like best friends now.
Number 7: Saix
Saix is a lot like Xemnas, only with blue hair. He also just sits there staring at Kingdom Hearts, except he doesn't monologue. Instead, he orders everyone to go on random missions. And he's incredibly rude – never once says "please". He should know that saying please makes it easier to get people to do stuff for you (as I proved earlier with Zexion). But, I learned something very interesting about him. Want to know what it is? Oh, of course you know what it is! Well, I'll tell you: I'm pretty sure I saw Saix staring at Xemnas's ass. Oh, no, I definitely saw him. If my suspicions are correct I shall play matchmaker, mwahahahaha!
So, conclusion-ness – Status: Bossy. Relationship Status: In a passionate lust filled affair with Xemnas? Or, wishing he was in a passionate lust filled affair with Xemnas? Dangerous?: Probably, but I'm only saying that because I remember fighting him in Kingdom Hearts 2.
Number 8: Axel
IN hindsight, there probably was no point in stalking Axel, since I already talked to him. But, I thought, why not? So I started following him around. First, he sat there playing with his fire for a while, which I swear I will never get tired of. Fire is so cool to look at! I kind of lost track of time – he could have been doing that for 5 minutes or 5 hours, I don't know. But I did learn something new.
Axel...um…likes to…walk around naked.
Oh, gods, why? Why did I have to see that? I mean, I'm 17, it's not like I'm young and innocent or anything, but…oh, why? I will never look at that man the same way…ever.
It is concluded – Status: Pyromaniac. Gender: DEFINITELY male. Oh, gods… Dangerous: I will never look at him the same. Ever. So much mental scarring.
Number 9: Demyx:
I take back what I said about Demyx not being as dumb as everyone thought, because he totally is. Demyx is an idiot. A loveable idiot, though. He's cute, like a puppy. Or a pet fish. Demyx is content to sit in one place for hours and play his sitar. Which, I mean, good for him, music is awesome, but he only knows like, three songs. It got really boring after a while. So, I snuck up behind him and whispered in his ear (in my best creepy voice), "I'm the Batman." He shrieked like a girl and fell over. Then he saw it was me, and he passed out.
I now have Demyx convinced that I'm the Batman.
So – Status: …Misguided. Species: Puppy (or a fish). Dangerous?: …not as long as he still holds respect for Batman.
Number 10: Luxord
Luxord was passed out drunk in a pile of cards the entire time I was watching him. It was boring.
What do I think? – Status: Alcoholic. Dangerous?: Not if you give him rum.
Number 11: Marluxia
Why must all of the Organization members insist on putting me in danger – whether physical, mental, or emotional? Marluxia managed to do all three. All. Three. I spied on Marluxia while he was in his garden. Well, duh, his power has to do with flowers, of course he would have a garden. But, as he was gardening, he was blasting Liza Minnelli CDs. You have NO IDEA how close I came to going insane while watching him. Thanks for the mental danger, Marly!
And then there's the flowers he keeps. Did you know that he has a giant (key word being GIANT) man eating plant? And it's not just man eating, no, no, no. Apparently it's also awesome girl eating, because it attacked me! I almost died! Again….But that was the physical danger he put me in.
And the emotional…oh, dear. This was as bad as the incident with Axel. You see, Marluxia…dances. Quite well, actually. But that's not the point. The point is, that he wears drag underneath his Organization coat. I'm talking mini-skirt, boots, garters, the whole sha-bang. So, whenever the mood strikes him, he can just whip off his coat and break into dance.
Why did I insist on Operation: Stalker? So much scarring! T-T Oh, well. There's only one more person left, might as well finish.
Sooooo – Status: Gay Gardner. Sexuality: If he were any more flaming, he'd be Axel. Dangerous?: Oh, yes.
Number 12: Larxene
You know how everyone thinks that Larxene is a sadistic bitch who hates everyone? Well, it's totally not true! She's actually really sweet, I think we'll be good friends. Did you know that she has little plushies of everyone in her room? Isn't that cute! She's really –
Oh. Never mind. They're voodoo dolls. Oh, yikes, Axel just got stabbed in the leg. Ah, Xemnas just lost his head. Oh, gods. Oh, the human body isn't supposed to bend that way Larxene. Hey, she even has one of me! Cool!
Wait, that's bad. Why does she already hate me? I've been here for less than a day!
I take it back. She's totally a bitch. I don't like her.
Final conclusion – Status: Bitch. Label: Sadistic. Dangerous?: I'm terrified of her, I don't know about any one else…
I'm starting to think that Operation: Stalker was a bad idea…
