Until I Collapse
A/N: I am loving all of the positive feedback from you guys It always brightens my day. Sorry this is another long chapter and there aren't many Daryl/Leah moments Just a warning that there is some slight cussing in this chapter (it is Merle after all). Anyways, happy reading…
Chapter 3 (Part II) – Wheel In The Sky
Another week had passed since the beginning of the outbreak. The camp was running low on food, forcing Daryl into longer hunting trips and sending Glenn into Atlanta to get supplies.
Leah woke up with a distinctly uneasy feeling because of the big run today. They had never sent so many people into Atlanta before, and she was worried that more people would attract unwanted attention. Surprisingly enough though, Merle had volunteered to go on the run; he was probably using it as an excuse to use his gun… and find more if possible.
Leah pulled her hair into a high ponytail as she fed Prince his breakfast; he had proved to be a good guard dog and Leah could tell he was growing closer to all the kids, he would never be bored with all of them around.
It was a little past seven in the morning when everyone gathered for breakfast, as usual Leah was the only one who bothered to think of Merle while he was keeping watch.
"Morning Merle," Leah said as she handed Merle his breakfast and a plastic fork.
"Morning Leah," Merle took the beans and started shoveling them into his mouth.
"Do my ears deceive me? Did you actually use my name?" Leah's fake amazement had Merle laughing. Leah decided to cut right to the chase, "I need to ask you a favor concerning the run today."
"I ain't grabbin' no girly shit, so just forget it!"
"Why would I ask you to grab it when Andrea and Jacqui are going?" Leah replied.
"What do ya' need me for then?" Merle barked.
"I need you to look after everyone. You can protect these people, this could be your chance to prove yourself."
"I don't care 'bout those people or what they think o' me, so why should I go outta my way to babysit 'em?"
"Because I care about them, I don't know what I would do if one of them didn't come back… that includes you too. Despite your constant name-calling I have come to think of you as a friend. I know you are a good man… Daryl is too. You just need to act on it a little bit more."
Leah was staring gently at Merle as he chewed over her request.
"Damn woman, don't go getting' all pouty on me." Leah continued to stare at him, unwavering.
Finally Merle relented after several moments of Leah giving him puppy eyes.
"Just so ya know, I'm only doin' this fur you."
"And I appreciate that, really, but you don't want to disappoint me. You think I'm dangerous now, just wait and see what I'll do if you break your promise," Leah said seriously.
Merle scoffed at the idea of Leah hurting, or attempting to hurt him.
With that, Leah climbed down from the RV to start laundry for the day.
…
It was about 8:30 when everyone was getting set to leave for Atlanta. Leah went up to Merle to remind him of their discussion earlier.
"Merle, you're a good man and I want you to remember that. Look after these people, they are sort of like family to me now. And I know how much family means to you, you would do anything for Daryl and I want you to do anything for them."
"I'm doin' a lot of promsin', what 'bout you darlin'?"
"What about me?"
"You have ta promise ta look after Daryl while I'm gone."
Leah could tell by the look in his stormy eyes that he was dead serious, Merle didn't mess around when it came to his brother.
"I will, Merle. Good luck and come back safe, okay?"
"Later darlin'." Leah gave Merle a quick hug, which he briefly returned before releasing her. The hug was enough to get strange glances from some onlookers; Leah secretly wished they would at least try to get to know the Dixon brothers.
Merle cleared his throat, "Enough of this emotional crap."
That earned a smile from Leah as she went off to say goodbye to the others.
Leah gave everyone a hug and then she got to Glenn and Andrea. She gave them tighter embraces than the others, she was closest to them in age and knew they would have been close friends in another life.
"Come back to me, okay you guys? Who else am I going to have late night pizza and beer with?"
"We will," Glenn and Andrea laughed as they returned the hug with the same amount of force.
Seeing everyone get in the car, Leah couldn't ignore the nagging feeling in her stomach watching them disappear into the distance with only a trail of dust left behind.
…
Shortly after the others had left, Daryl announced that he was going on an overnight hunting trip. Leah could tell that Daryl wanted to be left alone to worry about his brother; other members of the group didn't ever want the Dixon brothers around for extended periods of time anyway.
Leah went up to Daryl before he ventured off into the woods.
"Be careful, and catch a deer for me while you're gone," Leah smiled.
"Will do, kiddo. See you tomorrow 'round noon."
"Okay. Don't have too much fun, mister." Leah smiled at the nickname Daryl gave her.
Leah gave Daryl a hug before they parted ways, relishing in his strong arms. She wasn't going to lie, she would miss him while he was gone.
Leah went off with the women of the camp to help out with the first day of laundry. With the division of laundry, Leah did hers as well as Daryl's, Merle's, and Glenn's. She laughed at the thought of Merle and Daryl doing their own laundry before everything happened. Leah also knew that Amy needed something to distract her from Andrea going to Atlanta. Everyone needed a distraction.
Leah immediately took a liking to Amy when they met. Amy was a very bubbly person and Leah liked her for that reason, it made day-to-day life a little bit easier with her to keep everyone's spirits up.
It was late afternoon when they got the first shifts of the laundry done; they decided it was time to take a break and head back up to camp. They had been up at camp for all of ten minutes when the CB radio started crackling.
A weak signal was coming through, but Leah could tell it was T-Dogg.
"Hello, base camp… Can anybody out there here me?"
Dale was rushing up to the roof of the RV to get to the radio, Shane following close behind.
"Hello, base camp… This is T-Dogg… Anybody hear me?"
"Hello? Hello? Reception's bad on this end… repeat," Dale said into the mic.
"Is that them?" Lori piped up,
"We're trapped in the department store…"
The signal was cutting in and out, Leah could hear the thunder in the distance and figured that wasn't helping.
"He said they were trapped," Shane's voice was laced with concern.
"Geeks all over the place, hundreds of them… we're surrounded."
Leah bowed her head at the news, her stomach was starting to knot thinking about everyone in Atlanta.
"T-Dogg, repeat that last, repeat…" Dale was fumbling with the knobs trying to get a better signal. Soon, all they heard was static.
"He said the department store," Lori commented, worry in her voice.
"I heard it too," Dale and Leah announced simultaneously.
"Shane," Lori was quickly interrupted.
"No. We do not go after them. We do not risk the rest of the group, ya'll know that,"
Amy was immediately set off by Shane's response.
"So you're just gonna leaver her there?"
"Amy, I know that this is not easy-"
"She volunteered to go, to help the rest of us"
"Well, she knew the risks right? See if she trapped, she's gone."
Amy was furious know, "She's my sister, you son of a bitch." Amy stormed off after that, Leah hot on her tail.
"Amy?" Leah was jogging to keep up with the blonde.
"How can he say that? We can't just leave her there…" Amy was on the verge of tears now.
"I hate to say it, but Shane is right on this. We can't risk the rest of the group, but Andrea is going to be fine. You know her better than anybody, you know how tough she is. She has Morales, Glenn, and Merle to look after her."
"She shouldn't have gone in the first place, I should have told her to stay," the tears were flowing down Amy's cheek now. Leah gave her a comforting hug.
"If I know Glenn and Morales, they will do everything they can to get your sister back here safe. Okay? Andrea's going to roll up here before dark, you just wait and see."
Amy nodded against Leah's shoulder, Leah knew that she needed to keep her busy until Andrea got back. Leah had no room to believe anything else other than their survival, she just hoped Merle was delivering on his promise.
About an hour had passed and the rain had come and gone. Amy was helping Leah and Carol prepare dinner; they had maybe 100 cans of food left, mixed between beans, soup, and fruit.
Everyone's head snapped up when they heard a far off alarm echoing through the mountains.
"Talk to me, Dale" Shane ordered.
"Can't tell yet…"
"Is it them? Are they back? What is it?"
"Stolen car's my guess…"
Everyone in the camp looked at the red Dodge in bewilderment. Leah could just make out Glenn's profile in the driver's seat. As soon as he got out of the car Shane and Amy stormed up to him.
"Pop the hood! Pop the damn hood!"
"Holy crap! Turn the damned thing off!"
"I don't know how," was Glenn's only response.
"My sister? Is she alright? My sister, Andrea?"
"Okay! Okay! Yes she's okay, she's okay!"
"Where is she? Why isn't she with you?" Andrea was getting restless now, so was everyone else in the camp, eager for some good news.
"She's okay?"
"Yes… fine. Everybody is," Leah let out a sigh of relief, too soon however.
"Well… Merle not so much…" Leah stood frozen in her place. What could have possibly happened to Merle? That was a stupid question, there were a million things that could have happened to Merle.
Leah had found that she zoned out of the conversation, her mind fluttering with images of Merle surrounded by walkers… and the thought of what Daryl would do when he found out tomorrow. That had Leah worried most.
"Sorry. I got a cool car…" Leah focused back on the conversation and laughed at Glenn, she was so glad he was okay. Apparently Prince was too, because not two seconds later Glenn found himself eye-to-eye with the German Shepherd, being smothered in kisses.
Leah couldn't help herself from hugging Glenn either, relieved to have her friend back. "I'm so happy to see you." Glenn returned the hug, only to broken by the sound of another vehicle pulling up to the camp.
A huge van pulled up with Andrea the first to emerge, running towards her sister.
"Amy!"
"Andrea!" The two sisters were running towards each other, meeting in the middle with a huge embrace. Leah and Glenn still had one arm around each other as they watched Morales and his family reunite. The scene was so touching that it had Leah tearing up, but she didn't fail to notice Carl and Lori in the distance, the little boy clearly upset that his father was not among the returning party. Leah put her forehead on Glenn's shoulder, she could only imagine what Carl was going through.
"How did ya'll get out of there anyways?" Shane questioned.
"Yeah, we thought T-Dogg said you were trapped?" Leah's curiosity was peaked now.
Glenn spoke up, "New guy, he got us out…"
"New guy?"
"Yeah, crazy vato just got into town. Hey helicopter boy! Come say hello!"
Leah couldn't see who Morales was yelling to until she saw a middle-aged man in a sheriff's uniform step out of the van.
"Guy's a cop, like you."
Leah looked back to Shane and saw the look of recognition in Shane's eyes. Leah looked back to the man, who suddenly froze as his eyes landed on Lori and Carl. Realization suddenly clicked into place as she saw Lori and Carl look on in complete disbelief.
Suddenly Carl was running toward his father and Leah was pushed over the edge at the sight of the pair collapsing to the ground, she started crying as she saw Rick and Carl go to Lori. Leah only knew Rick's name from the many times Lori had taken up Leah's offer to talk; from what Lori had said, they were hitting a rough patch in their marriage before the outbreak. After Rick got shot though, she realized how much she loved him and wished she could take all the fighting and harsh words back.
She was watching the family hug when she suddenly saw Lori look at Shane with… guilt? Shane looked almost hurt to see the family together again, seeing him like that only proved Leah's suspicions of Shane having feelings for Lori. Leah didn't dwell on it too long, she figured Shane would get over it and be glad to have his best friend back.
…
Everyone had finished their dinner and were now listening to Rick talk about his journey after he woke up in the hospital. Leah wasn't sure how he managed to survive, but she thought he was a total badass for it. It just goes to show how far determination can take you in this world.
"Disoriented… I guess that comes closest, disoriented. Fear, confusion, all those things. But disoriented comes closest."
"Words can be meager things, sometimes they fall short." Leah could always count on Dale for kind words of wisdom.
"For a while I felt I had been ripped out of my life. Put somewhere else. I felt like I was stuck in some coma… dream. Something I might never wake up from, ever."
"Mom said you died," Carl looked up at his father with the most heartbreaking face.
"And she had every reason to believe that, don't you ever doubt it."
Leah suddenly saw Ed throwing another log into the fire sending sparks into the night sky, putting Shane over the edge.
"Hey Ed, wanna rethink that log?"
"It's cold, man!" Leah knew that this would become a standoff between the two men… testosterone seemed to cause a lot of trouble even before the world went to shit.
"Cold don't change the rules does it? We keep our fires low, just embers so we can't be seen from a distance."
"I said its cold. Why don't you mind your own business for once?" Ed was clearly uninterested in anything Shane had to say. Shane had clearly had enough backtalk from Ed and went over to confront the man. Leah wondered if the conversation between Shane and Carol had actually happened, she still saw bruises on Carol's neck; she knew that if she confronted Ed herself that she wouldn't last two seconds.
As Shane walked back, Dale finally mentioned the thing that had been on Leah's mind since the group returned.
"Have you given any thought to Daryl Dixon? He won't be happy to hear his brother was left behind."
"I'll tell him, I dropped the key… it's on me," T-Dogg interjected.
"I cuffed him. That makes him mine."
Glenn interrupted, "Guys, it's not a competition. I don't mean to bring race into this, but it might sound better coming from a white guy."
"I did what I did. Got nothing to hide from."
"We could lie…" While Amy's intentions were in the right place, Leah knew that telling the truth was the best option.
"We tell the truth. Merle was out of control, something had to be done or he'd have gotten us killed." Andrea was looking directly at Lori now, "your husband did what was necessary. And if Merle got left behind, it is nobody's fault but Merle's."
Leah hung her head in disappointment, she had faith in Merle and he let her down. She promised to herself that if she ever saw him again that he would have hell to pay.
"And that's what we tell Daryl? I don't see a rational discussion to be had from that, do you?"
Leah almost laughed at Dale's comment. There would be no rational discussion with Daryl, no matter how they phrased it. Leah finally decided to put an end to their debate.
"I know him best. I'll tell him and try and keep him calm, but it'll be a long shot. He doesn't know you, Rick. Put yourself in his shoes. If a complete stranger came up to you and told you that your brother was left in Atlanta during this, how would you react? I think it would sound better coming from a friend, and all the rest of you barely look at him anyways." Leah's statement made everyone quiet, they knew she was right, but T-Dogg had one final word on the subject.
Leah's jaw nearly fell off when she heard that Merle was still alive, still in Atlanta. She knew that if there was any way for Daryl to get his brother back, he would do it.
Everyone got deadly quiet after the news about Merle was announced, everyone was headed off to bed when Leah asked Rick something she knew was probably true.
"Rick?"
"Yes, Leah isn't it?"
"Yes, I don't mean to keep you from your family and I know you've had a long day, but I just needed to ask you something about Merle."
"Shoot."
"Did you happen to notice if he was… under the influence when he was on the rooftop."
"He was on cocaine when I first got the lovely opportunity to meet him." Rick's voice was thick with sarcasm at that last remark, not that she could blame him; Merle wasn't exactly a field of daisies.
Leah exhaled sharply, Merle was going to have even more hell to pay if she ever saw him again. "Thanks, Rick. Well, I'll leave you to your family now. Have a good night."
"Thanks, Leah. And thanks for offering to tell Daryl, it wasn't somethin' I was lookin' forward too. Good night."
"No problem, he's my friend. I would want someone to do the same for me."
Leah turned on her heal to leave Rick with his family, she was going to be up a while. She had a general idea of how Daryl would react, she just didn't know how much he would act on his anger.
Leah needed music to help her sort through her thoughts, now more than ever. She decided classic rock would be a good place to start, and this song had been one of her all-time favorites when she was a teenager.
Wheel in the sky keeps on turnin'
I don't know where I'll be tomorrow
Wheel in the sky keeps on turnin'
I've been trying to make it home
Got to make it before too long
I can't take this very much longer
I'm stranded in the sleet and rain
Don't think I'm ever gonna make it home again
The mornin' sun is risin'
It's kissing the day
Leah had no idea what kind of state Merle was in, she had no idea what she was going to say to Daryl when he got back, and she had no idea how angry he would be when she broke the news. Her battery was at 87% when she put her iPod away. She decided to take Prince down to the quarry for a little play time in the water, she reached for her gun and checked to see that it was still fully loaded, it was.
When she got down to the quarry with Prince, the moon was at its highest in the sky, reflecting brightly onto the lake. Leah didn't know how long she had watched Prince play in the water but she got a kick out of it, he was like a kid on Christmas morning.
When Prince was finally done he came up to sit next to Leah, she pulled her knees up to her chest still contemplating how to best bring up Merle, and most importantly… keep Daryl calm. Leah stayed like that until the sun came up. She basked in its glow, but at the same time, hated the sight of it because it meant that in a couple of hours Daryl would be back from his hunt.
A/N: Sorry this chapter was so long as well, a lot of dialogue. Let me know what you guys think, constructive criticism is always welcomed Will have the next update within the next week.
