Thank you to everyone who read or review the last chapter. Also thank you to everybody who left kudos. Reviews and kudos make me happy and keep me writing. Jaki, I added extra Coulson & Tony banter in this chapter just for you. I was really stuck on how to make all the pieces for this chapter come together, but your well-timed review pointed me in the right direction.

Also a reminder, now that GotG is out and we are getting closer to season two as well as getting more details about Avengers 2, this story diverges from MCU cannon at the end of AOS season one. I may incorporate elements from the new stuff (similar to what happened in my ST: AOS story The Truth About Love), but only if it fits with what I have planned. However, that probably won't happen until I do the next story.

Chapter 4: Cars are Easier to Fix then People


Five weeks earlier

When she finally climbed into the car with memory stick in hand, she was exhausted, sweaty and covered with dirt. May was relieved that Fury's riddle actually paid off. It took her several hours and the borrowing of some equipment, but she now had what she needed - she hoped. Part of her knew that she should close the car door and leave. She wouldn't be surprised if the guy who saw her exiting Phil's grave called the police, but she needed to know the truth now.

May grabbed the tablet laptop hybrid Stark gave her off the passenger seat and inserted the portable drive into its' appropriate port. Maybe if she hadn't been so exhausted or focused on bringing up the data, she might have noticed Steve coming to stand beside her. Instead she doesn't notice anything until he speaks.

"Did you really think you could come all the way to DC without seeing me?" She quickly closes out the file at the words and drops the device back on the seat. She checks her reflexive move to pull her ICER as recognition of his voice kicks in. She is surprised to find herself being enveloped in a hug. She wasn't sure Steve would ever want to speak to her again after he learned who she really was. Her ex-husband filed for divorce before even allowing her a chance to explain once he found out she was a spy.

"I thought you would be busy with Stark." Melinda said returning the embrace.

"You know?" Steve asked pulling out of the hug.

"Of course, I wouldn't have sent you that email if I wasn't okay with it. In a weird way, he's good for you. How did you find me?" Instead of answering, Steve simply points to her tablet. Naturally, Stark would track her.

"Tony told me that your James isn't dead - or I guess I should say our Phil is not dead." He only sounded slightly annoyed.

"More like back from the dead and possibly brainwashed by Hydra." Melinda quipped. "I'm here to find out if that was the case."

"There's been a lot of that going on along with lies from all sides."

"I didn't mean to lie to you." She doesn't say she was just following orders. She knows better than to say that now. "Just to clarify, I didn't sleep with you on Fury's orders. That was something I needed to get through things and I think you needed it to."

"But you did lie to me." Steve seemed visibly hurt.

"Not entirely." May closed her eyes. "My last name is May, not my first. Phillips was my last name when I was married. That marriage fell apart after he found out I worked for SHIELD. I really don't get along with my mother for the reason I told you, but different agencies were involved. I had a very long 'I told you so' conversation with her recently." It was a very long car ride from Canada and that was another part of the reason why she went to Stark instead of using her mother's contact.

"What about James?"

"Phil's middle name is James." May started to explain. "We've been friends since the moment I became a member of SHIELD. I have been in love with him for a very long time. I think he's the reason why I didn't even bother to fight when I received the divorce papers. When you and I first met, I was still mourning Phil. Fury did not tell me about Phil not being dead until Christmas that year."

"Is that why you forced me to see Tony afterwards?" He asked referring to her forcing him to go to New York after Stark had the arc reactor removed.

"Yes." Melinda answered simply.

"Are you really in love with him?" Steve asked pointedly.

"Yes, but nothing has happened." Melinda explained sadly. "Despite the second chance, I've been too afraid to act. Now, it's too late. In an effort to keep Phil safe, I completely betrayed his trust and now he hates me. That's the real reason why I pushed for you to talk to Stark before it was too late. Thankfully, you're braver than I am."

"You're always brave." Steve hugged her again. "I think he'll forgive you once he understands why you did what you d…" Steve was interrupted by Stark's AI which was slightly disconcerting because May swore that she deactivated all cellular and Wi-Fi capabilities on the special tablet. She should've known that any device created by a Stark would have the means to overcome such issues.

"Police have been called to investigate reports of vandalism at this location and are expected to arrive in 12.4 minutes." The AI told the pair. "It would be best to leave now. Mr. Stark has already made arrangements for you to be reunited with your team via private transport."

"I've discovered it's best to listen to JARVIS." Steve said walking around the car. He picked up the tablet and settled into the passenger seat. With the AI's directions they made it to the airport undetected. Upon finding Stark waiting for her on the plane, she wasn't entirely sure that was a good thing.


The Present

"I'm trying to decide what's more shocking, Melinda May hugging Captain America or seeing Captain America fly Lola into the Playground." Skye whispered to the other two as they witnessed the superhero embraced their usually stoic colleague. Unfortunately, Captain America was dressed in civilian clothes and not his trademark uniform.

In Skye's mind a fully restored Lola was the bigger surprise because honestly she never thought she would see the Corvette again. She assumed the car was a goner after Lola saved her and Coulson from Ward and Mike while he was still under the control of Garrett and Hydra.

The last time Skye saw the car, she was being towed away by Maria Hill because the former agent said that the technology in Lola couldn't fall into the wrong hands and she would take care of repairs. Apparently, taking care of it meant turning it over to Captain America or more likely his sugar daddy, engineer supreme boyfriend.

It's moments like these that she misses having Twitter. Captain America is hugging one of her friends and she cannot even post about it. She really wished she could post about Captain America dating Tony Stark. There were a couple of homophobic kids from one of her group homes that she would just love to inform of the fact that the patron saint of the orphaned and the biggest bad ass ever were anything but straight.

"The car." Trip whispered to her and Simmons braking Skye out of her thoughts. "I hope the security cameras are catching this."

"I do too. I miss my Stark phone. I would so be taking pictures right now." Skye lamented.

"Director Coulson's admiration for Captain America is legendary. Actually, his love for all things vintage including that car is legendary. Did you hear the story about how his Captain America cards were used to get the Avengers to come together in New York?"

"We don't talk about that story." Simmons said hastily remembering the angry glare that she and Skye had received from May when the woman walked in on that particular discussion. Of course that was before they'd found out the TAHITI truth. A cute little story about how Director Fury splattered "fake" blood on Coulson's vintage Captain America cards loses its cuteness when you realize that no fake death was involved. Of course, Trip didn't know about some of the more painful details regarding TAHITI.

"I find the embrace and laughter more shocking." Simmons remarked. If it wasn't for the fact that she'd seen the blackmail porn tapes from the Maria Hill collection, Skye would have been just as surprised. Apparently, the pair had the type of relationship where more than hugging was involved. (There was also one recording that had May, the master of emotional control, breaking down in Captain America's arms because she never made a move on a really good friend before he died. For Skye, it was proof that May actually has feelings.)

"Why?" Trip asked. "I've seen her hug you before." The incident in question was right after a particularly bad phone call with the doctors treating Fitz. It resulted in Simmons wrecking her room and May being the only one who could restrain her. The scientist fell asleep crying in her arms.

"I'm not sure I would actually consider that a hug, but May has been part of the team for nearly a year so it would be natural for us to have that type of relationship. However, she's never mentioned being acquainted with Captain Rogers." Simmons said defensively.

"If I did my math right, they worked together for months before she joined you guys last year. When you're running missions with somebody you grow close fast. It's the nature of our business. Therefore, I'm pretty sure they're friends. See, they're joking about Lola." Trip pointed at the two. They were no longer hugging, but Steve had his arm around her as the soldier showed her all the upgrades Stark made to the car. Oddly, he referred to Lola as being May's car.

Trip was right; they really looked like friends in that moment. May was actually smiling, smiling. Skye isn't sure that she's ever seen anything beyond a smirk from the woman. The only time she ever relaxes is when she's with Coulson. Seeing her like this was disconcerting.

Maybe they were friends. Skye couldn't see how that was even possible. How can you be friends with somebody you used to have sex with? Skye knows for a fact they had that type of relationship. She didn't think it was just a friends with benefits thing because she couldn't see a guy from the 40s going for something like that. However, most of her Captain America assumptions have completely gone out the window since she realized that was no superhero look alike in those video files, so what's one more. Biting, leather, and sex toys oh my.

Skye had never really stayed friends with any of her ex sex partners afterwards. Of course, she has a tendency to be drawn to complete assholes. In the grand scheme of things, Miles wasn't that bad. Is it wrong that she's almost happy she found Eric's body before she allowed Ward to convince her that a quickie while their friends were trying to capture some potential super villain was a good idea?

If she thought about it, May maintaining a friendship with Captain America shouldn't surprise her. May has always been able to separate physical urges from emotions. Despite having the thing with Ward, she had no trouble kicking his ass when needed and that was before she found out he was a Hydra puppet. Actually, the only time it was obvious that May had emotions that could be compromised was when Coulson was involved. Sometimes, Skye felt he was her only emotional vulnerability. She knows there's something there, but can't put a label on what that something is.

"It's a pleasure to meet you again, Sir." Skye turned around to see Trip actually saluting. Apparently, she was so wrapped up in her head that she missed part of the conversation and more important things like Trip and Simmons walking over to Lola.

"Please, you don't have to do that. And it's Steve not Captain Rogers." The captain or rather Steve said extending his hand.

"Grandpa and Jamie would be offended if I didn't try." Trip joked as he grabbed the man's hand.

"You served with his grandfather?" The captain just nodded his head at Skye's question.

"Then maybe you could tell us who it is. He rarely talks about anything personal. With a first name like Antoine, I'm thinking Jacques Dernier." She decided not to mention the bet that she and Fitz made about it before Ward screwed everything up because Simmons may start crying again. After a secure videoconference with Trip's mom (who looks more like his sister) about Fitz's status, she's even more confident of her choice in their betting pool. Unfortunately, Captain America and Trip just start laughing at her.

"I'm a spy. We don't give out details about our personal life unless we have to." Trip remarked.

"Or completely make things up instead like enjoying board games or not being a lying asshole." At that moment, she felt Trip's hand gently squeeze her shoulder.

"My mom named me after one of her childhood friends but switched the name into French. Uncle Jacques may have suggested it, but I don't know for sure." He pauses and then whispers in her ear, "I'm not telling you that just so you trust me, but because I trust you."

"So your grandfather is not Jacques Dernier?" Trip just smiles at her before leaning over to whisper in her ear again.

"You owe Fitz two stuffed monkeys and a pizza." The bastard knew about the bet. That's so unfair.

"I served with his grandfather and grandmother." Captain America confirms. "From the things May has told me, there is a lot of your grandmother in you. I'm sure she is proud of you." Trip just smiled at that, it was a sad smile. She remembered Trip vaguely mentioning something about his maternal grandmother having Alzheimer's and not remembering him half the time.

"Peggy Carter is your grandmother." Simmons blurted out joining the conversation for the first time. She's been so quiet these last few weeks and Skye hates it. It's like Jemma was missing half of herself without Fitz being here. Skye doesn't know how to make it better.

Trip essentially nods his head in reluctant confirmation.

"How did you figure that out?" Skye asked for a moment slightly shocked.

"Do you really believe I'm going to let anybody treat Fitz without researching their qualifications?" Skye knew she wouldn't. In all honesty, Skye was surprised Jemma hadn't asked her to do a background check on the entire hospital.

"Doctor Triplett received her doctorate under the name Stephanie Carter Jones in 1994 at age 24, two years before she changed her last name to Triplett. However, I didn't want to assume anything because Carter and Jones are common last names, and both parties were married previously. Also former Director Carter's children from her first marriage carry the last name Carter-Jones. However, the additional information from the captain makes it obvious that your mother is the only biological child Margaret Carter and Gabe Jones had together." Simmons said very matter-of-factly proud that she reached the right conclusion.

"I'm impressed and your hacking lessons have been paying off." Skye said proudly. May was giving her the look.

"Have you visited grandma recently?" Trip inquired before May could ask Skye anything about her special computer science lessons with Jemma.

"I went to see her two days ago after a particularly bad mission. She's okay. The good days are good and the bad days are…"

"Unbearable." Trip supplies for him and the captain just nods his head.

"If you want to see your grandmother, I can talk to Coulson about giving you some time off." May suggested, once again reaffirming that she is an actual human being. "Of the five of us, you may be the only one who can walk around DC without being arrested."

"Well for being a SHIELD agent anyway." Trip quipped.

"I thought we were no longer wanted fugitives?" Jemma asked slightly puzzled.

"The military and CIA no longer want us. However, the FBI and the NSA are not as understanding; the same goes for the intelligence branches of several other governments." Trip explained.

"The only reason why the military is no longer after you is Tony's lawyers and apparently the CIA is more pragmatic than their counterparts. Other agencies are taking more time to convince. However, by the time you guys come to DC next week, things should be okay." The captain said almost smiling which bothered Skye. Maybe the reason why Stark is trying so hard to clear Coulson's name is because he wants him for SI.

"I haven't spoken to Coulson about that yet." May finally spoke.

"I thought you were going to…"

"I haven't had a chance and we haven't decided anything yet." May said cutting off the captain.

"Why do I feel like there's an entirely different conversation going on that I am missing?" Skye muttered to herself.

"Because they probably are," Trip mumbled under his breath before turning to the rest of the group.

"It's fine. I'd rather not run into my ex-fiancé right now. I don't feel like hearing 'I told you so'. Robin never completely liked SHIELD and in the end it's why our marriage never happened."

"Mr. Ray, correct?" The captain asked and Trip nodded his head. "I think he's one of your grandmother's nurses? Or rather he was. Evidently, Peggy punched him after he said some unflattering things about you when the news about SHIELD came out. She broke his nose." The captain related smiling broadly.

"That's grandma. I've always known that she is still in there somewhere." Trip said returning the grin.

"You were engaged to a guy?" Simmons asked Trip slightly shocked.

Skye had already known that for a little while. She may have tried to sleep with Trip to get the taste of Ward out of her mouth during their fourth day at the Playground only to discover he was just 'straight for OPS'. He was really nice about it. They raided Billy's secret chocolate supply and watched trashy romantic comedies. At one point, he told her about this crazy mission where he had to pretend to be his cousin's boyfriend because the person in charge of the mission had no idea they were related.

"Yes, my ex-fiancé was a guy and he was also a complete prick." Trip told her bitterly.

"There's nothing wrong with that. I mean there's nothing wrong with you being gay, but it was very wrong of him to end your engagement for such a ridiculous reason-I have no trouble that you're gay or bi or… Fitz dated a few guys at the Academy which is probably why I didn't…" At that point during the babbling, tears began running down her cheeks. Trip placed his arm around her.

"I am a complete idiot." Simmons said breaking down in sobs and Skye just froze. Computers were so much easier.

Thankfully before things could get more awkward, Iron Man drags Coulson into the hanger.


Steve had wonderful timing, Tony thought to himself as he slid his phone back into his pocket after reading Jarvis's notification. Super boyfriend arrived at Coulson's secret compound just as he told Coulson about finally striking a deal with Agent Scary. Coulson had essentially been silent since Tony started telling the story of how Ninja Neighbor broke into his house in Arlington.

"I don't know what I find more unbelievable, that you knocked May unconscious and she let you live afterwards or that you only agreed to help her after she confessed that she was in love with me." Coulson skepticism was deafening even if he hadn't raised his voice.

"I don't know why. You're a very lovable guy. I flew a nuke into a portal just to avenge your death." He decided it was best not to say something along the lines of 'I'm probably only alive because Ninja Neighbor knows that you like me'. Truthfully, he doesn't want to say this out loud because he doesn't want to be proven wrong which seems highly probable considering the annoyed glare that he's getting from Director Agent.

"I don't think that was the only reason." Coulson mumbled under breath.

"If it wasn't for you, I would still be a self-absorbed ass. I think you helped me become more than that. You're the heart of this operation. You see the good in everyone. It makes sense that Ninja Neighbor is in love with you."

"I don't believe you." Tony wonders if he's really saying 'I can't believe you.' He is pretty sure the only thing that will convince Coulson is hard evidence which was conveniently waiting in the man's email inbox.

"Agent May made the deal because she wanted to protect you and now that SHIELD is mostly ashes, I'm the only option." Director Agent visibly bristled at that. "She wrote Steve a riveting love letter that convinced him that I'm not a complete dick and he showed up at my front door a few hours later. It took him a while to actually knock on the door, but eventually we were making out like teenagers. It all worked out." And they ended up having sex on the staircase. He kept that remark to himself since he's already been chastised once for over sharing.

"While you were making out with your new boyfriend, my team was being detained by an Air Force Colonel who has a tendency to go straight for bunker busters. And Skye, the one who is apparently friends with your AI, was in Hydra custody. I don't consider selling out my entire team to Colonel Talbot as help." Tony just closed his eyes. Maria Hill, the gift that keeps fucking him over.

"That is not my definition of help either." Tony began. "My definition of help was stashing you and your team at one of my private houses overseas in a country without an extradition treaty until the lawyers figured out a way to get you all off the FBI most wanted list - which they're still working on by the way. I think the CIA corroboration will help. Then I was going to put you in charge of my new crime-fighting nonprofit. I was thinking of calling it the Future Foundation." Director Agent continued to glare at him.

"Okay, maybe we need to come up with a different name but we cannot exactly call it SHIELD because of the 'branding issues'. Although, we could call it Captain America's Shield or something like that, but I'm not sure Steve would be…" Because of the glaring, Tony decided it was not the time to let Coulson know that his childhood idol was upset with Fury for not entirely keeping his promise (frankly, Steve should know better by now, because Fury always lies). The only thing placating him was Tony and Agent Scary's reassurance that any organization Coulson was in charge of was going to resemble what Peggy started rather than what the organization became in the end.

"Look, I really didn't have a chance to talk to Hill before she went off on her Canadian adventure. Ninja Neighbor didn't quite follow my instructions and knocked out one too many federal agents following Hill. Because of this, she was detained before I could speak with her. I'm not even sure she read my text message asking her to bring you back with her." Knowing Maria Hill, she probably ignore the message on principle. Tony believes this is revenge for never doing what SHIELD wanted him to do in the first place.

"She tried to convince me to leave everybody else to the system and follow her to SI, but I wasn't about to leave my team behind. That's not my style." Coulson explained.

"I'm aware it's a package deal. I would take Agent Scary just so I would have somebody to watch Steve's back during his mission to find the Manchurian Soldier. Sam has a day job and Steve's self-preservation skills need work." If it wasn't for super soldier healing, Steve would still be covered in bruises after his last adventure. Tony believes this is the universe's way of getting back at him for all the things he put Pepper through.

"Steve would've made me anyway. Steve would also make me take Peggy's grandson regardless. Howard would have made me do the same thing if he wasn't taken out by Hydra. He adored Jamie, Marcy, and Stephanie."

His dad always got along better with the Carter-Jones daughters than his own son, except for Desiree. Desiree hated Howard. Sometimes Tony was positive that his father simply hated him because he turned out to be a boy. The guy wanted a daughter so much that stored somewhere in the DC house Tony has a pink baby blanket embroidered with the name he would have had if he'd been born female. It's probably for the best he wasn't, because two Avengers named Natasha would have been confusing.

"I'm personally mad that SHIELD found Skye first." Tony told Coulson shaking off his own thoughts. "Also, I hear you have a biochemist who would make the perfect playmate for Bruce and according to Hill your engineer saved Steve's ass with his mouse hole thing. That means he has a lifetime offer of employment at Stark Industries."

"Unfortunately, Fitz is currently in a coma." That must be the engineer.

"I know that's why I'm paying for his hospital care. Wait, I thought his last name was Simmons." Tony remarked. Although, the name Fitz is really familiar. He thinks that he may have went to college with somebody with that name. Suddenly, he remembers a 20-year-old British girl in Lola's backseat.

"That's it. Her last name was Fitz." Tony said out loud without thinking.

"What are you talking about?" Coulson gave him a strange look.

"Lola." As soon as he said the name, Coulson got a wistful look on his face.

"What does Lola have to do with anything?" Director Agent asked slightly annoyed.

"Ever since Maria Hill dropped the car off at my house as a peace offering at the end of April, I've been trying to remember the name of the girl I slept with in said car when I was in college." Okay, now Coulson looked really pissed off.

"You had sex in my car?" Tony was expecting him to yell, but he didn't. He just raised an eyebrow.

"Not recently. Steve refused to even let me give him a blow job in the car once I was finished with restoration." Tony wasn't even joking about that. Coulson's expression just got darker.

"Stop looking at me like that. It wasn't your car at the time. It was dad's car back then and you know me and doing anything to piss off daddy. Come to think of it, it was a SHIELD car, so neither one of you really had ownership. I was maybe 15 and she was 20. She was this beautiful exchange student from England or somewhere around there and completely out of my league. I tried to impress her by borrowing my father's car before I was old enough to drive. It worked." Tony quipped.

"You do realize that was statutory?" His last therapist said something similar.

"It seemed like a good idea at the time and it wasn't like Howard actually cared enough to press charges or so I thought. Anyway, I couldn't remember her name except that it started with an F or a K. Now I remember, it was F…"

"Was her first name Kella?" Coulson interrupted.

"I think-maybe. What's with all the questions? Do you really want to hear all about my sordid sexual past if it doesn't involve Stevie Bear? That reminds me, did you seriously offer to give him a hand job in the middle of…"

"I'd prefer not to know about it at all," he answered emphatically avoiding the hand job comment. "Except I've been hearing about little else for the last hour. What was the point of this conversation?"

'To get you to remember that you told Pepper about having feelings for Melinda during your drive to the airport before all hell broke loose which is the real reason why you let the cellist moved back to Portland without trying to change her mind.'

"To make you realize that Ninja Neighbor is completely head over feet in love with you to the point that she would break into my house and use her best friend as a bargaining chip because she knew I love Steve to the point I would do just about anything." Tony said instead.

"You're in love with Captain America?" Director Agent asked slightly shocked.

"I have an unbelievably inappropriate crush on Captain America to the point where I did things with his posters that I probably shouldn't have. Evidently you did too judging by the fact that you're starting to look a little pink." Tony joked.

"I will not confirm that."

"Captain America is perfectly crushable. I mean those arms and that ass made me realize I was into guys long before I was being dragged into the backseat of a vintage convertible." Tony almost sounded wistfully. "But Captain America is not Steve. Steve is a prick when he wants to be. He's supposed to be a tactical genius and yet he doesn't always think things through. He will rush in head first if he believes it's worth the risk. He curses like the Army man that he is. He hogs the covers and don't even get me started on his inability to talk about his feelings."

"Which is something your great at considering you couldn't even tell your loved ones that you were dying," Coulson said bringing up the Palladium poisoning incident.

"You have no room to talk because you couldn't tell your loved ones that you're not dead anymore." That statement shut Coulson up very quickly.

"Fine, you don't want to believe May is in love with you or maybe you do believe May actually cares about you and you're…"

"Last time, I got two agents killed because I let my personal feelings get in the way which is why I don't date other agents, anymore." Coulson interrupted. Tony wondered if he was talking about the rumored Hawkeye incident. Clint still refuses to confirm that one.

"Except you are not an agent anymore. The old rules do not apply. You can do whatever you want." Tony told him.

"Just because you slept with your CEO…" Coulson started

"Who I am still friends with even after our relationship went sideways. Your relationship with Clint even survived. In both cases, work never suffered." Director Agent didn't even flinch when Tony said the man's name.

"Does he know?" Of course, he would ask that question.

"No, you get to tell him yourself. I've already dealt with Pepper." Pepper was bad but, Clint may use him for target practice. He doesn't even want to think about what Natasha's reaction will be. Tony only told Bruce because of science and remarkably the disclosure did not result in having to rebuild the lab (again).

"Maybe for your birthday weekend we can have a 'Thanks to alien DNA Phil Coulson isn't dead' party. We'll have lots of alcohol. It will be great." Tony already knew it would be as bad as 'the birthday party that Pepper does not speak of' hopefully with less property damage, but this needs to happen.

"No." Director Agent answered emphatically.

"What about presents? Actually scratch that. Your present is already outside." Tony said realizing it was time to hand over the keys to Lola.

"What did you do?" That's when Tony dragged him out of the plane to see Lola with Steve and Agent Scary standing next to the car. However, Coulson's attention was focused on the scientist sitting on top of the car's hood in tears with the person Coulson refers to as Agent Triplett. With that last name, he must be Stephanie's kid. (And the fact that her kid is probably about the same age as Steve, not counting his time as a Capsicle, made Tony feel like a dirty old man.) The car went completely unnoticed until the scientist apologized for crying on top of Lola.

"You brought Lola back?" He asked blinking.

"I distinctly remember telling you that I was restoring Lola for the sole purpose of giving her back to you. I'm sure I said that." Tony said from the edges of the group.

"No, you didn't." What followed was Director Agent going into complete fan boy mode over Steve. Tony was watching the whole thing unfold with JARVIS's new BFF.

"It's like the Howling Commandos gear all over again." His fellow computer hacker mumbled next to him. "He really needs to get a room."

"That's what I'm hoping for." She just looks at him strangely.

"Not with Steve," Tony told her before thinking better of it. "Well, unless I was watching."

"And this was how old SHIELD got their blackmail porn on you." The girl quipped.

"You saw the video?" He asked slightly worried. Steve couldn't deal with that tape being made public right now.

"For someone in your 40s, you're very limber." She joked. "You don't have to worry about me leaking the tape. If I wanted it on the Internet, it would be. Thanks to Coulson, I'm not that person anymore." She reassured him.

"Director Agent is special that way. Did you happen to see the other…" He trailed off pointing to Coulson and May.

"The one where she breaks down over her dead friend … It was Coulson. Seriously?" Skye asked confused.

"Yes and I'm trying to play matchmaker." Tony sighed.

"Getting rid of the competition. Very smart." Tony chose to ignore the comment.

"How fast do you think you can get everyone else out of this room?"

"Quickly, but on one condition?"

"You want something other than a five-year-old laptop? Done." Actually, that was already in the trunk because JARVIS deserved better living conditions.

"No, I want your promise that you won't take Coulson away from us. We need him right now." That almost sounded like a plea.

"I promise to do everything in my power to make sure Director Agent will be around for a long time." He decided not to mention what all that might involve.


Four days earlier

Today was a bad day. He had yet another meeting with Congress or rather congressional staff members thanks to his new (and now former) assistant forgetting to mention Tony was personally doing the briefing. The congressmen would have showed up otherwise. To be honest, he'd rather deal with the staffers anyway. At least they actually knew what they were talking about and there was significantly less ass kissing on all sides. (Tony wondered if he could possibly poach one of the staffers for himself. He's already gone through two assistants since Candy tried to kill him.)

After trying to explain for the thousandth time that he was completely unaware that Hydra had infiltrated SHIELD when he provided it with proprietary tech and that many of the agents were innocent and therefore should not be rounded up and shot like dogs for the sake of politics, all Tony wanted was Steve. Specifically, he wants to be fucked against the nearest wall by him or to do the same to him. He wasn't picky.

The only problem was Steve was in Brooklyn looking for the ghost of best friends past after another potential Winter Soldier sighting. His boyfriend swore that he saw a glimpse of a metal arm when Tony dragged him to this old Brooklyn pizza place that had existed when Steve was growing up. This wouldn't be horrible if Tony could return to the tower, but he was keeping his promise to give Pepper space.

Their dinner with her three nights ago was one of the most uncomfortable of his life mostly because his now former assistant conspired with Pepper's assistant to play relationship counselor by scheduling them both to attend the same business dinner. (If he'd known Pepper was attending, he would have never allowed Steve to tagalong. Contrary to popular opinion, he's not that much of a dick.) After Steve apologized profusely and gave her a large bouquet of flowers (which he still would like to know how Steve knew to bring), the conversation revolved around the appetizers and meal in general because everything else was too classified or too awkward. Tony decided it was probably best that he go back to DC.

In his defense, anything with Pepper was going to be awkward regardless (as proven by their private business lunch the next day to deal with the meddling assistants). Pepper was still upset about the Coulson thing and it wasn't like they could actually talk about that in public (but it came up several times at lunch). Sleeping with Steve, she was perfectly fine with. She even made a threesome joke. (Seriously, why did he never consider that option before he ruined his chance by being an ass?) But wait a couple of hours—okay, two days - to tell her about Coulson not being dead and he was getting another icy glare. He had already sent her shoe apology basket number 10 for this alone. The last time he sent her the BIG basket was after he got the Malibu house blown up. Finding out from a cocky and idiotic Colonel that one of your friends was not really dead was probably equally traumatic.

Making matters worse, the business dinner just happened to be with the new head of accounting Jonathan Triplett and his wife, who had been named head of SI medical research at GMUC primarily because a patient potentially going crazy from being injected with a super drug made from alien DNA wouldn't faze her. He didn't realize until the dinner Stephanie Triplett was actually Stephanie Carter-Jones, who pretty much stopped taking his phone calls after the great kidnapping incident of 1986. (Maria Hill didn't tell him how this event was tied to a SHYDRA plot referred to as Project NURSERY until the morning after this meeting. The list of ramifications is still more than he can focus on now.)

It wasn't until they were in the guest rooms at the tower that Steve tells him he only asked to come along on this dinner was because he knew Stephanie was the daughter of Gabe Jones. Why couldn't Steve have mentioned that on the way to dinner?

To further derail things, he couldn't talk to Steph about the real reason he brought her into SI. They were in public (again thanks to the assistant not following his instructions to arrange for something at the tower) and the fewer people who knew about Phil's resurrection the better. Tony didn't want his reunion with the guy after so long to be a rescue op.

Add in the fact that he is now dating her mother's ex-boyfriend (and somehow she figured that out without him saying a word) and of course the only safe area of conversation is going to be the cuisine. This is why HR was looking for another new assistant for Tony. Tony didn't even fire her, Pepper did.

Because Steve was occupied with his great winter soldier chase (and he'd promised said boyfriend to cut back on his drinking), the only acceptable way he could decompress was to work on the cherry red vintage convertible currently in his garage that Maria Hill brought back from California. It had only taken him a few moments to recognize the cherry red darling as the one that had belonged to his father.

Tony and this car had history. He'd learned to drive in this car at 12 thanks to his mom, Maria, and Jarvis. He'd lost his virginity in it. He was almost 15 and she was a twenty something British or maybe Scottish exchange student that he'd impressed by borrowing his father's favorite car just so he could see her one last time before she went home. He couldn't remember the girl's name, but he remembered the car's involvement. He also remembers his mom grounding him for two months for 'disappearing' that night despite the fact that he was in college at the time. She'd been terrified he gotten kidnapped because it was only a few months after the Stephanie incident. Now that he's an adult and he knows about his father's role in SHIELD, he understands why the kidnapping of the daughter of his father's old friend was so terrifying. Howard and Peggy Carter-Jones had a lot of the same enemies.

He punched a wall for the first time when he discovered that Obadiah sold Lola right after his parents died. He was furious. He just lost his mom and dad, he didn't want to lose one of the few things he associated with happy times (not that there were many).

It wasn't until Hill managed to bring the car back with her from her botched Coulson mission that he found out Lola Stark was a weaponized flying car that would make James Bond jealous. After his father died, SHIELD took possession of it because they couldn't allow someone outside the organization, not even him, to have that technology. Personally, he believes they were mostly keeping the car away from Obadiah. Lola was coming back to him now because daddy dearest put in a strange provision into the original SHIELD bylaws. If something were to ever happen to SHIELD most of the proprietary technology, intellectual property, and patents would revert to Stark Industries. Apparently, Lola was considered 'intellectual property'.

However, during her 23 year absence she was locked away for years until Coulson rescued her from an unknown storage facility and lovingly restored the car. According to Steve, during Phil's not death the car went into the custody of Agent Scary. It annoyed Tony that he never went with Steve to look at his neighbor's vintage convertible.

Hill probably brought the car back to get back on his good side. It didn't work. There was lots of screaming, mostly about her and her cohorts keeping Phil's resurrection from all the Avengers. They didn't have to tell him the miracle drug details, he would've accepted 'the dead for eight seconds' lie that they were using for everyone else. That's what he'd told Pepper and she believed it. Tony shouted at Hill for half an hour for that alone. Steve was particularly angry when he found out that they purposely kept May in the dark for the first six months for the sole purpose of trying to convince her to become the seventh Avenger.

Tony and Steve yelled at Hill for a full hour for screwing with Phil's mind. He remembers saying something along the lines of "No wonder the other agencies can't see the difference between SHIELD and Hydra because right now even I'm having a hard time seeing it." He was beyond furious on agent's behalf. It only got worse after Pepper told Tony about her last conversation with agent. Apparently their friend broke up with the cellist for another reason beyond not wanting to do a long-distance relationship and her name was Melinda May. Unfortunately, Phil doesn't remember any of that because they fucked up and deleted too much.

As a mechanic, he wanted to fix Phil. The mind was not his area of expertise (Luckily, he had the money to hire people who were subject matter experts so that was okay), but Lola he could fix. After everything that's happened, at least he could give the guy back his car even if a part of Tony wanted to keep it. Unfortunately, Lola Coulson formally Lola Stark needed a lot of work.

Working on Lola the last few weeks gave him a way to decompress after dealing with congressional kindergartners. Hydra had done a number on the vehicle. Restoring her flight capabilities was easy. He may have had a little too much fun upgrading her defense capabilities because he really would like Director Agent to stay alive for as long as possible. Lola would also be the first car to run on arc reactor technology. However, getting rid of the bullet holes without having JARVIS scour for replacement pieces all over the globe was a lot harder. After four weeks, the car was practically ready for delivery.

"Agent May is calling." The AI interrupted as he was tightening one last bolt underneath Lola.

"Tell her that Steve's in Brooklyn right now and just send an email." Tony said absently inspecting his work.

"Agent May is trying to reach you." The AI responded.

"Tell her to call me back later. I'm busy." By busy he meant that he wanted to take the car out for a test drive. He wondered how far out of the city he would have to go to find someplace where nobody will notice a flying car. Maybe he should have added cloaking capabilities.

"She said to tell you that Director Coulson is currently waking up in the middle of the night to compulsively draw a design similar to the one made by Hydra operative John Garrett during the height of his psychosis. She sent you a picture." Okay, that was bad.

"Put the call through." Tony tells the AI worriedly.

"What's going on? I thought Agent Agent was doing okay. He sounded fine when I spoke to him a few days ago, just snarkier. By the way, thank you for sneaking my phone number into Fury's toolbox." If it wasn't for May telling him the truth, Tony had this feeling that they would be working against each other instead of working together. It was better this way.

"Technically it's Director Agent, if you insist on using that nickname."

"It does have a ring to it." She just sighed before explaining that last night she caught Director Agent carving strange possibly alien symbols into one of the walls in the storage room. Considering the wall was covered in those designs, she thinks he's been doing it for weeks possibly ever since they arrived at their current location. However, during daylight hours he doesn't remember anything. He could tell that she was very worried about this. He was too, but he refused to show it.

"I could Instagram a picture to a certain Asgardian, but I think I'd have a better chance of getting a message to Asgard itself than the middle of nowhere place he is now." Tony joked. Realistically, Thor may be the only person who would have a clue to the meaning of what Phil was writing.

"Be serious." The agent snapped.

"Being a snarky ass is how I deal with stuff." Tony told her defensively. "When dealing with the effects of alien biology, don't you think that it's a good idea to consult an alien?"

"The fewer people that know about this the better, at least for right now. I'm not even sure if knowing what the symbols are will actually help us. Have you spoken to Dr. Triplett about Phil's underlying condition at all?"

"She hasn't had time to meet because she's dealing with another patient. Considering that patient is one of yours and she calls you guys every other night, maybe you should talk to her about it." Tony said defensively.

"It has to be in person. Even this conversation may be too dangerous, but at least I know that both sides are secure." He knew she was right. Tony heard about the kidnapping as part of Hill's 101 excuses for keeping him in the dark.

"Then you should bring Phil here." Tony suggested. He personally felt it was a brilliant idea. It shouldn't be that hard to convince the others to come down for a few days.

"Too dangerous," Agent Scary said a little too quickly.

"Lawyers are working on getting the NSA, FBI, and the governments of several other countries not too shoot the moment you arrive in DC. I'm sure you, me and Steve can deal with all the other threats. Also, you already promised to make Coulson have dinner with Pepper as soon as it was safe. I need that dinner to happen so she will stop being mad at me. I'm even working on building a cover for everyone on your team. I'm thinking of making you Steve's new assistant." In his mind, he could just picture her glaring at him. "In the meantime, I want to stop by to see Phil for myself."

"No. Call me when Dr. Triplett is brought up to speed on the situation." With that she disconnects from the call.

"Do you know where she was calling from?" Tony asked the AI.

"Of course, Sir. It was very easy to reactivate Agent Poots Wi-Fi capabilities on her laptop. She is calling from one of the bases that you helped design." Tony smirked at that.

"Is there anything I have to do Friday that absolutely requires my presence?" Tony asked already making plans for a very special weekend getaway.

"You have a meeting with the Board of Directors at two that day. This cannot be rescheduled." The AI left out that Pepper would kill him if he did not show up.

"Okay, let Maria deal with it." Considering everything she's done, she deserves to deal with the wrath of the board. Besides compared to Congress they are pushovers. "And call Steve."

"Of course, Sir."

"Hey, Stevie Bear." He started before Steve had time to even say his name. "How do you feel about a weekend retreat to a secret not quite military installation? Agent Scary will be there. I'm sure you could talk her into a three-way or if we are lucky a four-way. Look, I know you haven't found Bucky yet, but you need a break. This is slowly driving you crazy."

"Tony, I don't think that is such a great idea." Steve sighed.

"Maybe not the group sex, but everything else is. Besides, I kind of want to meet this computer prodigy, Skye, in person. Trust me, it will be great and I think May needs you. Phil is getting worse." Tony knew he would win with that statement.

"Ok." Steve acquiesced.

To be continued.