A/N: listening to "Noel, que du bonheur" by Ilona Mitrecey eEp! Sorry for not updating in a while. I'd been out of the country for a week (no lie), and then I said, "Hmm, I should probably update on this story," but lazy Kiryu was procrastinating. So, here it is. Read and enjoy, and please, review!

Chapter Four: Meet Hangrer and Master Tumblewindere

The train ride was getting boring for the two most strapping lads in the soon-to-be students of Hogshorts School for Kids Who Wanna Make Banging Noises with Sticks. Ronny Weezler and Strapping Dashing Neville were practically drooling by the end, until Ronny, looking up from rummaging around in his bag for his inhaler, spotted—lo! the castle of Hogshorts School for Kids Who Wanna Make Banging Noises with Sticks!

"Y-YOUR MAGESTY! YOUR GRACEFULNESS OF MISTER NEVVLY! WAKE UP!" Ronny Weezler began shaking Neville quite forcefully. Psh. If Strapping Dashing Nevvly's bodyguards had been there, they would have removed the offending personage from Neville, gently dusted him off with a gold hankie, and beat the offender to a mushy, weezing pulp. Alas, this was not to happen.

"Don't call me Magesty, or any other of that other nonsense," Neville said crossly. "My name is Neville. Anyway, what are you going on about?"

"It's—it's Hogshorts, Neville!" Ronny stuttered. "We've arrived."

"About bloody time!" Neville grumbled as the two youngsters mashed their faces forcibly against the train window in an attempt to catch a glimpse of only the best school on the face of the whole bloody world.

Shortly after, all the students were descending the train steps onto the platform of Hogshorts Station. The first thing that the first year's bulging eyes fell upon was the large, beastly profile of none other than Hangrer! Hangrer, the scorekeeper for Hogshorts! Hangrer, the great boar of a man, abandoned by his jerkish parents and raised by the bears, who was going to escort the new recruits to the Hogshorts team to the headquarters of their kind, the magical kind of people, who are way better than those stupid Smuggleys, who think that by inventing a virtual game played with controllers on screens, they have created magic! HA! With real magic, you could place yourself inside the game, itself! Yes, Hangrer knows of this wonderfulness, and so do his fellow faculty members. But before they can even begin to pass into this fortress, Hangrer must give them a talkin' too. He must sniff out the selfish, unworthy little jerkfaces that he knows are in every group. The bears had taught him that. He would honor the tradition. He had too. He was ready.

So he opened his ferocious maw and bellowed, "FIRST YEARS, GET OVER HERE, YOU LITTLE IMPS, OR SO HELP ME GOD, I WILL STRIKE YOU WITH MY BEARISH CLAWS!"

Of course, the first years hurried over and gathered round. Nevvly and Ronnie were in the front. The girl of Harrie Snotter's dreams was in the middle of the crowd. Harrie tried to continue his pursuit of this beautiful creature, but of course was pushed back into the crowd by those lousy CENSORED that Hangrer would soon sniff out.

Hangrer surveyed the crowd of little ducks with cold eyes. He would not show his soft side until all the little Beelzebub's were exterminated. No bullying diseases would be spread among the Gabrielles. God, Hangrer thought with a sense of pride, will reward me tonight. The more human side of Hangrer was very religious.

"All right, you little potential hellians, listen up. You are about to step into the most awesome place on earth, so you better shut up and pay attention. First of all, there will be no prank-pulling. Only once has this ever happened in the history of Hogshorts. A stupid kid who'd gone too far caused that episode. We all remember him, except not so fondly. Second of all, there will be no talking in class. I think that can speak for itself. And… well, there's a bunch of other rules that I can't rightly remember off the top of my head right now, but basically, they all say not to let all hell break loose in class or otherwise. And uh… who here hates bears?"

A bold, slick, blond-haired boy raised his hand. His name was Dracy Malcintosh.

"Get up here, boy," Hangrer growled.

Dracy sauntered up to the front with his ever-present swagger. He does it all the time, so maybe you should get used to it 8.

"Turn around," Hangrer snarled when the boy got up to the front.

Malcintosh's facial expression changed slightly from smugness to bewilderment. He didn't move.

Hangrer turned him around himself and Malcentosh felt Hangrer's boot connect painfully with his slick arse.

"Now get back to the back of the crowd," Hangrer said as the boy took the Walk of Shame, clutching his stinging heiny all the way back. "And you've got too much gel on that slick head of yours," Hangrer added to the back of Dracy's overly-gelled head.

Hangrer turned his gaze back to the stunned first years, who cringed visibly. "Now let's get a move on." He said in what he assumed was a kind, humanly voice, but was really more of a growl.

The first years, not wanting to be the next victim, hastily followed Hangrer.

A/N: Heheheheh. Hope you like it. Oh, BTW, about this: 8. That's an angry face, in case you didn't know ;;.