He had something to tell me. Something that he knew I wouldn't like hearing. I could always tell when he was nervous to break news to me by the hint of panic and discomfort in his voice. He didn't like disappointing me. He'd be at Pinkberry in five minutes to "talk."
I sat at the table drumming my fingers on the table, snapping a piece of gum. Cody hated it when I chew gum (the noise bothered him), but it helped me settle my nerves. I hated the anticipation that encased me. Was he going to say that we should break up?
Maybe he needed to tell me that he'd found someone else.
Maybe he didn't love me anymore.
I clutched at my stomach which had twisted into a billion knots, my breath was coming in quick shallow bursts and my skin crawled unpleasantly.
Breath, I reminded myself. I hoped that that wasn't it. He wasn't really like that. I exhaled. I exhaled and looked around the ice cream place. Almost abandoned, with just a Burberry-clad checkout girl on a laptop, and a few college students, all extremely bored.
The door flew open and a boy with sunglasses and a black hoodie walked in, along with a cool breeze. I smiled a little, and rolled my eyes. Sunglasses despite the fact that it was ten o' clock at night. Like any of the punk rock college students would recognize my pop-star boyfriend, even without a disguise.
He glanced around, checking all the people, then abandoned his sunglasses on an empty table. He knew he didn't need them. He made his way over to me, just as I spit my gum into a napkin.
"Hey gorgeous," he said, sitting next to me on the booth instead of across from me. He leaned over me and gave me a little kiss on the cheek before wrapping his arms around me and shaking off his hood.
I reached up and combed my fingers through his golden blonde hair, absently putting it back in place. He reached up and pushed it back off his forehead, guiding my hand with his.
"So what do you need to tell me?" I asked, snuggling into his side and bringing my legs up onto the booth. He held me close.
"Oh, that…"
He just held me closer, not elaborating.
"Baby, what is it?"
"Well…" he sounded upset and a little scared. I bit my lip to keep myself from screaming in frustration. He had found another girl. I knew it!
"Cody, talk to me!"
He grabbed my Coke off the table and took a long swig to avoid my question. He looked even more frightened. Wait, was he guilty about something? Had he cheated on me?
My annoyance and confusion turned to sadness, hurt, and anger.
"Are you cheating on me?" I demanded, my eyes narrow.
"Wha-" He asked, very taken aback. "No, of course I'm not. You know that you're the only one that I'll ever want."
"Then what is it?" I asked, my heart lifting with relief.
"Angel, I'm going back on tour. To Australia."
A lump formed in my throat. It was not that I was super clingy and wanted him around all the time because I thought he would be with other girls.
I needed him around. He was the only one who could consistently make me smile. As pathetic as it was, I depended on him to make me happy.
"For how long?"
"Just three weeks," he whispered, pulling me even closer and running his fingers through my hair soothingly. "I'm going to miss you."
I nodded into his chest, a single tear escaping and running down my face. It left a wet mark on his gray shirt, darkening as it sank in to his chest. It was followed by a second, and then a third.
He felt my tears sink through his thin shirt and they melted his heart.
"Please don't cry," he said softly, pulling back and holding my tearstained face in his hands, caressing my cheek gently with his thumb. "Please. I feel so bad already. I'll miss you every day, all day."
That just made the tears flow down my face harder.
"No, no, no," he murmured, pulling me back into his embrace. "Angel, shh…Everything is going to be fine. I promise, okay?"
"Stop," I said, suddenly. My voice was sharp and my tone harsh. "Just stop."
He released me and I fell back onto the booth, pulling my knees to my chest. I wiped my eyes.
"Are…Are you mad at me?" His aqua grey eyes were confused and he was frowning, always concerned. I looked down at my lap, allowing my hair to curtain my face and hide my eyes from him.
"N-no," I whispered, wiping the tears away before they had the chance to fall and betray me. I was regretting my snap already. My heart was starting to grow heavy. This was what it felt like when he was gone. I was always on edge. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean…"
He knew what I meant.
"It's okay. I know how much it can hurt."
I nodded, realizing that my tears had stopped. I felt empty, drained, and most of all, numb.
"I'll call you every night," he offered. "I'll tuck you in through the phone. It will be morning for me."
I smiled a little bit.
"And it's only twenty-days. If you come to the airport tomorrow, it will be just twenty until we see each other again. But that's at five a.m…"His voice trailed off skeptically. He knew I rarely dragged myself out of bed before ten a.m.
"Okay," I agreed.
"Really?" He asked, his eyes alight. "You'll get up that early just for me?"
"Of course I will," I said. My face was still puffy from crying and I was still hiding behind my hair
"That's my girl," he murmured, pulling me back into his arms. I looked p at him and saw his sad aqua grey eyes gazing down at me. He tucked a strand of silky hair behind my ear and brushed the rest away from my face. "That's better. Can I see a smile?"
I shook my head. What the hell was there to smile about?
"No?"
"No."
"How about now?"
He pulled mu up onto his lap and started to tickle me, paying special attention t the curve of my waist and neck. My extra-ticklish spots.
"Stop," I laughed, finally cracking a smile.
"There she is," he said softly. "There's my lovely, happy girl." My smile lingered only a second longer. God was I going to miss him. How could I always make me happy?
The next morning at the airport I felt indescribably sad. Twenty-one days of feeling th pit of loneliness in my stomach. Twenty-one days of sadness and hurt. Twenty-one days of pure pain.
I walked with him as far as we could go in silence. He was quiet too. Most couples would be talking about everything, trying to make up for lost time. But we weren't like that. We knew that no matter how hard we tried, we wouldn't be able to replace the lost moments.
Our hearts beat the words that our mouths were too stubborn to speak.
"I promise with all of my heart that I will call you every single night."
I swallowed back my tears.
"I know you will," I said.
"And we can text and tweet and Skype?"
"Okay."
"And the minute-no, the second I get back, we'll do this." He pulled me in, one of his hands on my waist and one caressing my face gently. We kissed gently a million times before his flight was called.
"Damn," he muttered, pulling away. I grinned a little bit and he connected his lips to mine for another split second again and then again, and then again. He ran his hands through my hair, and it felt amazing.
"Last call for flight 239."
"Mmmm," I hummed, pulling away, pulling back from his lips. "You need to go."
"I know," he said regretfully. "I'll see you very soon." He gave me a final kiss, this time on the cheek. "I love you baby."
With that, he took off for his plane. I watched him leave, a single tear escaping down my cheek and dripping onto the floor.
Twenty-one days to go…
Note: Heeeeyyyyy! So my wonderful readers, please review this! I worked really really hard and if you review…then….I have no idea what you guys like, but I hope it's Cody Simpson! If you review you get CODY SIMPSON! JK, I have no control over that and if I did have him, I'd probably keep him to myself and only share with my reviewers! Please review!
