My feet couldn't carry me to Stiles fast enough.
Unconsciously, I slowed down, taking Stiles' appearance in without letting my presence known. He looked downtrodden and it broke my heart to see him so upset. I couldn't imagine what he was going through. I had been blissfully unaware of everything that had gone down for the past two days. I had gotten that magical kiss with Stiles and then it was a total blank from then on while Stiles had lived through it all.
He had found Lydia, probably had even been there when she had been killed. Guilt ate me up inside. I should have been there with him. I knew how it was going to affect Stiles. Death wasn't something Stiles handled well after what happened to his mom. He hid behind sarcasm and goofy smiles but Stiles had been my best friend my whole life, I knew when he was hurting.
I watched as he tossed his backpack carelessly over his shoulder, staring back at all the prying eyes of our fellow students. Everyone probably knew most of the story, minus werewolves and the Alpha. His brown eyes looked tired and red from lack of sleep. He was frowning, his brows furrowed as if lost in thought, probably reliving that night.
He started walking off towards the school, staring at the ground for a few moments, looking up just before he was about to collide into me.
His big chocolate eyes enlarged at the sight of me. His mouth opened a bit, too shocked to speak, which seemed to be a first.
I cleared my throat, unsure where to start or even what to say after all that had happened.
"H—" I started to speak when Stiles' voice came back.
"Mason…" He uttered, his countenance brightened dramatically, "You're—you're here—I thought—you're okay…" Without really thinking about it, I threw myself into his arms, tossing my own around him.
"Stiles," I murmured, taking in his inviting smell. "Are you okay?"
He let out a loud, disbelieving laugh, "You're amazing, you know that, right?"
I pulled away, putting on the first genuine smile in days. "So I've been told. Are you going to answer my question or keep shamelessly complimenting me?
He snorted before his smile faded slightly. He shrugged, glancing down at the ground again. I reached out to touch his face but he turned his head, rejecting it. Dropping my hand, I felt slightly dejected.
"I'm fine," he told me in a hollow sort of voice. His eyes seemed dead as they refused to look in mine. They trailed down my face before they fell on my neck and the bandage. "You're neck!" He blurted, the fire back in his eyes as they finally shot up to mine. My hand flew up to it, unconsciously. I gulped, knowing that this was where the lying had to begin; I just hoped that Stiles wouldn't see through it too quickly.
"You were bitten…" He gasped, his eyes getting wet. I shook my head fiercely in disagreement.
"No! I was just attacked." I lied, hoping it would make him feel better. He looked at me confused, unsure of what to think. I assumed he believed me because he let out a sigh of relief.
"Are you sure?" He asked cautiously.
I nodded, smiling falsely, "I promise. I would never lie to you, Stiles." And I hated myself deeply as the words came out.
The bell screamed loudly as if I was standing right beside it, instead of a football field away. I cringed as it rang in my ears; Stiles looked around as if we were under attack.
"What's wrong?" He asked quickly.
"N-Nothing," I coughed, "Just—a bug or something. My bad."
The bell had cut our conversation short. I had half a mind to ask him to skip with me (against all the moral fiber of my being), but he needed the distraction of school. I, on the other hand, was increasingly worried about school. What if all these new senses were too much for me to handle? I needed to speak to Scott about this, and soon. Scott was going to be my biggest asset if I was going to be living a lie with Stiles.
I felt Stiles' warm, soft hand slip into mine, squeezing it. I looked up at him, shocked at his tender display of affection in public. "I'm glad you're okay. Really glad. You know I'm terrible with expressing things and using words without making myself look like an idiot like I am now, but I don't know what I would have done if the Alpha had gotten to you. I would never be able to forgive myself if I had let him change you, Mase."
I bit my lip, holding back a whimper at his heartbreakingly sweet words.
I took in a shaky deep breath and pressed my lips softly on his for a brief moment. I could hear his heart beat picking up as I pulled away, making me smile lightly. Before he could say anything that would make me feel worse, I started walking up to the school, knowing that today was not going to be easy.
I took my seat next to Scott in our history class. He didn't look too happy to see me.
"Scott, listen," I started, trying to get his attention, "I really need to talk to you about something."
He seemed to be feigning deafness.
"Why won't you talk to me?" I demanded feeling extremely annoyed. I needed Scott more than I had ever needed him in my life and he was now, suddenly, unavailable for comment. How ironic.
"I'm just trying to listen to the sub." He mumbled, ignoring my pressing glances.
"Yeah, well, I think what I have to tell you is a little more important that what happened in during the Boston Tea Party." I said sharply, causing him to steal a glance in my direction.
"What?" He gulped, looking at my desk instead of my face.
I was about to answer him when screeching sound tore through my ear drums. The history substitute had started writing on the ancient chalk board (honestly, who has a chalk board anymore?). The sound of chalk on the board made my teeth hurt and my whole body stand on edge. I tried to not let the pain show as I rubbed a hand over my face, hoping to find some distraction or way to destroy that board without anyone being the wiser. Even through my watering eyes, I could see that Scott was being affected too, though not as badly.
"Scott, he's going to write on this board the entire class, I can't sit through that." I breathed deeply, trying to keep myself together.
"Sit through what?" Scott asked, trying to play it off. I let out a small whimper as the blood curling noise went on, breaking me down even further as it did. I could hear everything: the loud breather from across the room, the careless boy texting on his iPhone, a pimply faced girl fiddling with her flowery hair clips.
I couldn't sit through this for an hour and ten minutes. I wasn't even lasting five. There was just too much occurring and I was slowly going mad. If I didn't get out of here, I was going to lose control and snap.
I stood up abruptly and announced I wasn't feeling well. The substitute gave me a sympathetic look.
"Can Scott escort me to the office? I don't know if I'm going to make it, I feel a little faint." I was fully aware that the only sounds in the class were my classmates quickening heartbeats. The bald teacher looked taken aback by my request but nodded anyway.
"Don't worry about coming back, Mr. McCall," He told us as he scribbled something on a pad of paper. "Just make sure Miss. Mayfield is okay." Scott looked less than thrilled that I was getting him out of class, which was astonishingly abnormal since anyone who knew me knew that I could be dying of a stab wound and still be dutifully taking notes in class.
"Hope you feel better soon, Mason. Things will get better, you'll see." He smiled warmly at me. I nodded, forcing my own smile, feeling a little uncomfortable since I'd never met this man in my life and he knew my name.
I bolted out the door, leading Scott out into the hall. I dragged him a little ways down the hall until we reached the locker room. The PE teacher had a prep first period so I knew no one would be down here. I pulled open the door and waited for Scott to walk through. He looked at my neck again, with a guilty countenance, and stutter stepped before finally going through. I locked the door behind us, knowing we could finally talk in private.
"The Alpha bit me." I cut right to the chase. He froze, his back to me so I couldn't see his reaction. "I need your help and Derek's too. What happened just now can't happen with Stiles because he can't know. He wouldn't look at me the same and I couldn't live with that, not after all it took to get us to this point. I love Stiles and I'd rather die that hurt him anymore than he has been. So please, Scott. Please help me control this."
I let out a deep breath, trying not to get myself all worked up over this. Scott didn't speak and it was worrying me. What was going on with him?
"The Alpha bit you?" He said in a thick sort of voice. I nodded though he couldn't see me.
"I don't remember much at all after I left the gym to look for you. Bits and pieces flash through my mind but it doesn't make sense. All I know was that after I went looking for you I was running through the woods…I was attacked…and when I woke up in the hospital, I was a wolf! I pulled out my IV and I watched it heal, Scott!" I said in a scared voice as I relayed what I did know of the event that had occurred since the dance.
"So you don't remember what happened?" He slowly turned around with an unreadable mask. I shook my head, annoyed that he didn't understand my point.
"Scott, I'm a werewolf. A lycaon, a wolf girl. Whatever you call it, that's what I am and you're not getting that whole 'I'm the Seducer' situation I'm in now. And also the fact that I just lied to Stiles' adorable little face and told him point blank that I wasn't bitten and that I'm still human!"
He nodded, "So you don't remember what happened?"
"Scott!" I cried, extremely frustrated. He held his hands up in defense.
"I'm just trying to figure this all out." A small, relief smile fell upon his face.
"What on earth could you possibly be smiling about? What have I told you in the past three minutes that could bring happy feelings to you?" I interrogated.
"Sorry," He muttered, leaning against a locker, breathing out a sigh of relief for some reason.
"Are you just going to keep being unhelpful and weird or are you going to engage in this conversation?" I huffed.
"Help, sorry." He sighed, thinking it over, "What's the bandage for if you're a wolf? Hasn't it already healed?"
"It's for my dad, Stiles, and everyone else's sake." I told him, removing it to reveal my unblemished skin. He pursed his lips as he took it in.
"Why didn't you tell Stiles?"
"Would you have told Stiles if he hadn't been the one to figure it all out?" I questioned, taking a seat on one of the wooden benches.
Scott didn't speak for a few moments, "I don't know." He said truthfully, running a hand through his hair. "He would probably have found out anyway, he's nosey that way. Plus, he's my best friend. I couldn't keep something that big from him and since you guys are…" He cleared his throat awkwardly, causing a small smile to creep onto my face, "Since you two are together now, you shouldn't keep it from him, Mase.
"I don't want to give you relationship advice because it's still a little strange for my best friends to be dating each other after months of fawning over each other, but you should tell Stiles. He loves you, Mase. He'd do anything for you." He told me seriously, making me feel even guiltier.
I swallowed, heaving a great sigh as I plopped down on a bench. "How do you know?"
"Oh, Mase," Scott groaned, taking the seat next to me. "This is Stiles we're talking about. He's more loyal than a Labrador. I know Stiles and he loves you and you becoming a wolf won't change that. You couldn't stop it," His face held that same terrible guilt from earlier, "What happened wasn't your fault, Mason. It was mine."
"Yours?" I asked, puzzled.
"Y-Yeah, I should have been there. I should have stopped Peter. None of this would be happening if I hadn't ignored you and been distracted by Allison." He said resentfully, looking away from me.
"What happened that night, Scott?" I questioned.
"Stiles will still love you, no matter if you're human or a wolf." He ignored my question. "You're the only girl he's ever loved, and I know that for a fact." He consoled.
I sniffed, letting that set in as I realized what had been bothering me most about all this. It was the real reason I couldn't tell Stiles.
"What if…he doesn't?"
"Doesn't what?" He furrowed his brows.
"Love me." I sighed sadly, staring a whole at the cement floor.
"He will." He said, convinced.
"How do you know?" I asked again.
"Because." He replied stubbornly. I groaned, giving him a look that told him to give me a straight answer. "Because you're Mason and he's Stiles. You're best friends and, quite possibly, soul mates, and if I've learned anything from these past few years is that you're always there for each other. Nothing can come between two, and he told me—" He stopped suddenly, with a shifty look on his face like he'd said too much.
"He told you what?" I begged, needing to be reassured.
He sighed, debating on whether or not he should let it slip.
"We went to visit you in the hospital that night. Your dad and Stiles' were off in search of some mountain lion or wolf, depending on who knew what, and he was so distraught. Mase," He stopped, glancing up at the wall as if he couldn't look at me as he said it, "Mase, he cried."
"Stiles cried?" I whispered, feeling on the verge of tears myself.
"It was…unexpected. I didn't really know what to do but talk to him about it. He was so upset that he had let you get hurt. He kept blaming himself and he told me that—He told me that he loved you more than anything and he couldn't live without you."
I looked up at Scott's serious eyes, hopeful, "He said that?"
Scott nodded, "But you should have him tell you how he feels. Tell him that you were bitten. He'll still want to be with you and maybe you'll realize how much he really loves you."
I gulped, my cheeks flushing at the thought of Stiles wanting me. "I'll tell him."
"Good," Scott smiled, relieved, "I don't want some blow out to happen if you don't tell him and he does find out."
"I thought you said he wouldn't be mad!" I cried.
"He won't if you tell him! If you go on living your life, pretending you're normal and keeping this from Stiles, and when (not if) he finds out, he's going to be furious. He may even feel betrayed. So, tell him, Mase."
"I just said I will," I said annoyed, "Just not yet."
Scott groaned, thinking his point wasn't getting across but I had a plan.
"Help me control this wolf stuff so I can have a normal relationship with Stiles." I pleaded, "When I'm ready, I promise I'll tell Stiles. It kills me more than you know that I'm living a lie with Stiles but it's for his own good." I told myself more than Scott.
"So, will you help me?" I asked again.
Scott stood up, crossing his arms with that guilty look again. "Of course I will. Just tell Stiles before it's too late. You don't want to regret it."
I nodded, feeling slightly better that Scott was on my side. I would tell Stiles.
Just not yet.
I only hoped I could bring myself to do it soon, I just needed to know for sure that Stiles wouldn't stop caring if he knew what kind of monster I was now.
