PART FOUR
On the planet Sularia.
She had been restless for days, unable to understand why she could be in the grip of such an emotion. She had elected to be posted as far away from Earth as possible, at least while Chakotay and Seven of Nine were still living there.
She had a spacious office and a very pleasant Sularian aide who seemed to want to be glued to her side.
"Because, Admiral, you need to be reminded to eat!" Cullen had sounded outraged, adding, "We Sularians know how to eat!"
"You cannot expect me to do the same. I support only one stomach, or am I supported by only one stomach," she said reflectively.
After that exchange, Cullen had ceased badgering her to eat. He made certain she kept busy as she had ordered, filling even her rest times with engagements. After all, Sularia was petitioning to become a member of the Federation. So Kathryn had kept herself well-occupied blanking out images of Chakotay and Seven of Nine together. She wanted to forget about them, about them being together the way he was with her on Voyager, in the holodeck. She did not perform the wedding ceremony for them. That honour had fallen to Admiral Hays. By that time, she had already asked for a commission away from Earth. She'd barely been reunited with her mother and Phoebe when she saddened them by leaving shortly after returning home.
She was not the only Federation senior official on Sularia. Three other admirals and their posse of aides, junior officers, wives, girlfriends and children were here too. They had other tasks to complete. Hers was to establish a peace keeping force of both civilians and military. Her job was almost done. Too many banquets were playing havoc with her health and she was ready for a new mission. Perhaps take Voyager again. But Voyager had been given to Chakotay. She had visions of being posted deep in the Gamma Quadrant…
She couldn't stop thinking of them, of the chances she had thrown away by not committing herself to marriage to Chakotay. Sometimes, whenever she couldn't help herself, she'd clutch her bosom trying to drive away the pain. She had been so obsessed with her mission, driven to get Voyager and her crew home. As commander of her vessel, duty, loyalty, discipline constantly kept her from binding herself to Chakotay, to marriage. Although her heart desperately wanted to, just touching the four rank pips on her collar kept her prisoner.
I was so stupid!
With a sigh she switched on her monitor to check for updates and messages from Earth. Minutes later she closed communication again and sat with her head in her hands. She was dog tired thanks to her aide Cullen who kept her so busy.
In the late afternoon, sun streamed in through the window. No important messages, no one on Sularia really caring, her only purpose that of fulfilling her mission. She should return to Earth, she thought as she rubbed her eyes tiredly. She'd left everything that was known to her, had hardly taken time to adjust to being back in the Alpha Quadrant before she left again. More like running away, like a coward who couldn't face Chakotay and Seven of Nine together, married, happy and pregnant. She missed Earth, she admitted to herself as she tried vainly to wipe away a tear.
"I am destined to be lonely," she murmured in the empty, cold office.
"No woman as beautiful as you should be alone, Kathryn…"
Her head rocked up, her eyes widening as she saw who stood just inside her door. Beloved, beloved figure, so familiar her heart wrenched painfully. His eyes were kind and loving as they rested on her.
"Chakotay!"
He smiled as he stepped forward.
"Yes, it's me. Surprised?"
Kathryn rose from her chair and hurried round the desk. Her heart thundered wildly as he opened his arms and she fell into his embrace. He was rock-solid, his cologne teasing her nostrils as she rested her head against his chest.
"I am surprised. No Annika?"
"She is at Starfleet Headquarters, as you know."
"Oh. And?"
It was enough that he was there, his presence very reassuring.
"She is a good person, Kathryn. But my love, do not worry about her now, understand? She has blessed us. I am here and I want to be with you."
As she gazed into his eyes, she saw they were clear as if they were telling her that it was okay to love her and be with her. She was torn between wanting to kiss him and withdrawing because he was married. She wanted to make herself believe it was okay to love him without inhibition and conditions.
"It's okay, Kathryn, my love," he said as if he read her thoughts. "Come, you must show me around. This is a beautiful planet. I saw a great mesa from the shuttle. Take me there…"
Overjoyed that she didn't have to worry about Seven of Nine, Kathryn broke contact with him, taking his hand to lead him out the door, yet the way he held her it seemed he was leading her. She didn't question how he knew the terrain around the Ambassadorial buildings or the outskirts of the city. The thundering of her heart had slowed down to a thrilling flutter that warmed her body. So she followed him.
Later they sat under a tree on the banks of a dry river. She wormed herself against him, her face in his neck.
"Chakotay."
"Yes, my love?"
"Why does it feel as if I know this place?"
"Maybe because I told you about it, on Voyager. Remember?"
She didn't remember, yet it felt familiar.
"It's nearing Christmas time," she murmured absently, her eyes misting with tears.
"Christmas is important to you?"
She glanced up at him, frowning again. "You know that! Haven't I told you before? On Voyager?"
"I just wanted to hear your voice, dearest Kathryn."
"Well, it's very important. My mom and sister attend a midnight service on Christmas eve near our home in Indiana. Then we have a family celebration on Christmas day with a big Christmas tree. Maybe one day…"
"One day what?" Chakotay asked when Kathryn seemed to linger on an old memory.
"I will show you, when we get home."
"Then I shall show you how we celebrate the ceremony of the Soyaluna."
"Soyaluna?"
"Yes. It is a celebration thousands of years old, when we believe that the sun god travels the furthest away from Earth. So we have a prayer festival in which the warriors bring back the sun."
"That sounds beautiful."
"It is. One day…"
"One day what, Chakotay?"
"I shall share it with you, when we get home. I cannot imagine sharing such a sacred festival with any living being but you, my love."
Kathryn turned in his embrace and looked deeply into his eyes, all thought of Seven of Nine forgotten.
"I love you."
His face broke into a beautiful smile. Suddenly the smile faded.
"Chakotay?"
"I need you now, Kathryn. You must come…"
"Admiral! Admiral!" someone whispered urgently in her ear, shaking her shoulder.
She lifted her head sluggishly, looking with a dazed air at Cullen, blinking hard several times.
"W-What - ?"
"You fell asleep, Admiral."
"I had a visitor."
"Who?"
"Chakotay. He was my first officer on Voyager. He was here - "
"Chakotay? I do not know anyone by that name. I can assure you no one entered the building in the last few minutes. I would have known if any visitor wished to speak with you. You are certain?" Cullen asked with a heavy frown.
How could Cullen not know? she wondered. Chakotay had been with her, outside, against a tree next to a river. She shook her head again, confused, admitting reluctantly that she could have been dreaming. Perhaps Chakotay was there and they had gone outside for a while. She'd returned to her office and Chakotay had left again. But why would he leave? What was that last cryptic message?
I need you. You must come…
Kathryn looked about her, the room bright with sunshine streaming through the window. She closed her eyes, trying to re-image those last moments with Chakotay by the tree, but all that remained were echoes, sounds that drifted further and further away from her.
"Okay, Cullen," she said as she stared at her aide. "Perhaps I was dreaming."
"There was no one here, I assure you. You are exhausted, Admiral. You should go home and rest, not fall asleep here in your office - "
Just at that moment her monitor beeped. She glanced at Cullen, who threw up his hands knowing she wanted to be alone to respond to an incoming message.
"Thank you, Cullen. That will be all."
When he left the room, Kathryn quickly activated the monitor. A familiar face looked directly at her.
"Seven?" she exclaimed in total surprise.
"Yes, Admiral. Your presence is required on Earth. It is of the utmost importance."
No greeting, no preamble. It was just like Seven of Nine to cut to the heart of the matter.
"Is anything wrong? You appear distressed. Did anything happen to Chakotay?"
"Yes, Admiral. Let me assure you first - Chakotay and I have terminated our marriage. But he needs you. He really needs you."
The news that Chakotay was no longer married flew by her as her concern over his health took precedence. A wave of nausea hit her as she realised that Chakotay might be seriously ill somewhere.
"What has happened to him?"
"He was working on a dig in Mexico when the ground gave way and a sinkhole opened beneath him. He fell down about thirty metres where his head hit jutting rocks. He remains critically injured. He has suffered serious head trauma."
Kathryn was shocked at the news. Could that have been why she'd imagined Chakotay was with her? That it was not a dream but a sign, a call for help? Seven's eyes filled with tears.
"Everyone is concerned, Admiral - Lieutenants Paris and Torres, the Doctor. We have informed former Voyager crew stationed on Earth who have all agreed to keep a vigil until you arrive."
Seven blinked to squeeze away the tears that threatened. "We divorced," she explained tearfully, "because I was not truthful to you and Chakotay. I lied to you both. I have realised the error of my actions. I am sorry that I deceived you. I thought - I thought it was the way to secure my happiness. I was in serious error. Please forgive me."
Kathryn nodded, her own eyes red with unshed tears. Seven seemed genuinely contrite.
"I will return to Earth. My work here is done, anyway. And Seven…thank you."
For letting Chakotay go too. He would never have left you…
Seven kept her gaze on Kathryn who frowned at the way the former Borg seemed to hesitate about something.
"Is there anything else?"
"Two things, Admiral. Forgive us for anticipating your decision to return to Earth. Lieutenant Paris is piloting the Delta Flyer. He will arrive on Sularia within hours."
"That is very good. It would have taken me more than a week to arrange transport and reach Earth's orbit. Thank you. What is the other thing?"
"Chakotay called out a name just before his heart stopped and the Doctor revived him. He remains in a deep coma, though. The EMH thought you might know something."
"What name?"
"Oberon."
The name struck an instant chord. Kathryn felt a cold, cold shiver and knew that her face paled. She swallowed with difficulty, just barely managing to acknowledge Seven of Nine.
"Admiral? You are pale. Are you well?"
"It's nothing, Seven. Just the news of Chakotay's illness. Thank you for letting me know."
"Acknowledged."
Seconds later she closed communication. She was reeling, more from the one word Seven mentioned than actually hearing of Chakotay's illness, the coma from which he seemed unable to emerge or even that Chakotay was now a free man.
She leaned back against her chair and closed her eyes.
END PART FOUR
