Authors Note: Oh my very goodness what am I writing here? XD Its short, yeah, but eh. I think you're getting the picture, right?

~Natty.


Making Amends.

~PoM~

"I don't even know why I'm bothering to do this." Kowalski complained, slapping down the sponge against the wet sculpted wood. "Another thing is I distinctly remember some ten moments ago giving you my humble advice. I calmly and suggested fully that you not do what you were about to do and you go on doing it anyway then repeat the same line I said as reasoning for you not to do it but in a different tense." The analyst scoffed. "As if I didn't know the reason why you shouldn't do it before I instructed you not to do it. Yet here I am in our bathroom huddled over a washing basin on my knees, scrubbing sculpted wood with a sponge to get off the Theobroma Cacao you so carelessly splattered over Skipper's inanimate past flame."

As this rant was going on Private was more concerned over how hard and rough the analyst was being with the doll as he spoke, as opposed to the actual lecture he was being given. He couldn't have followed it anyway if he tried but he kept flinching whenever the sound of the coarse side of the sponge raked loudly over the wooden doll. The small penguin twiddling his flippers as he thought of how to get it through to Kowalski that he should be gentler. Then came a particularly long word out of the blue and he furrowed his brow.

"Theo-what?" Private questioned.

Kowalski sighed as he allowed his flipper holding the sponge to sink into the tub of water at the doll's feet. He wiped his brow with his other flipper before giving the private an unimpressed look, saying monotonous. "The chocolate."

Private's beak made an 'o' shape and the analyst got back to scrubbing. He was doing it too rough again. He had to be hurting her.

"K'walski?"

"Mm?"

"You're…don't you think you're being a little too rough with that?"

"Rough with what?"

Private flinched again as another scraping sound made him cringe. "With hula girl. I think you're hurting her…"

"Private don't be ridiculous." Kowalski scoffed, looking back down to the rhythm of the sponge.

"I think you are though. Couldn't you be a bit gentler then?"

Kowalski sighed and failed not to show his weakening patience. "For the love of positively charged protons- I am not hurting it, I am cleaning it from the mess you made! Now would you please! HONESTLY!"

Private stepped back to give the analyst some room with a frown and a small sigh.

"Thank you!" Kowalski said and got back to scrubbing off all the chocolate from the wood. He groaned in annoyance when he realized the spots on her skirt weren't going to come out as easily. It looked like he had to rub extra hard to get out those. His flippers started to pull off the garment.

Private gasped really loudly with horror on his face. "What are you doing K'walski!"

"I have to clean the skirt too, don't I? I can't leave it on and clean it. The stains would never come out so obviously I'm taking it off." Kowalski rolled his eyes. What did it look like he was doing? He moved to pulled it down again.

"Oh dear! Oh-" Private's cheeks were beet red and he peeked out of his flippers in sheer embarrassment. "Shouldn't we let her do that herself?"

Kowalski pulled back, throwing up his flippers. "What are you going on about now?"

"K-K'walski…you can't just take off her skirt…"

"Why can't I-" the analyst saw how flustered the private looked and he just couldn't believe it. "Oh. You think there's something anatomically- Right. Private, how do I explain this? Hm…how to explain…how to explain…Ah, here we go. There's nothing-…no I can't say that…She doesn't- huh no…wait! No, no…think…" Kowalski tapped his brain to get it to think quicker. "Aha! She isn't real. That's a good enough argument as any. There, I hope I've put an end to your worries."

"Maybe we should let her take off her own skirt in private." Private suggested embarrassed, not catching on to a single thing the analyst thought aloud about.

"Oh you have got to be…How about you wait outside?" Kowalski asked.

"I promised Skippah I'd watch her, but not like this. Let's go outside and wait for her to finish up. It's the respectable thing to do, K'walski."

Kowalski pulled his flipper away from the private trying to lead him out of the washing room. "Private I understand what you think you're talking about and it is very gentle-penguin like of you, but if we leave this inanimate object in here to do her own bidding it will literally take all of eternity and eons for her to finish, and for a scientific fact she never will. Do you understand?"

Private furrowed his brow, connecting the analyst's actions in his head. His soft eyes hardened to a glare at the options guy of the penguin team and he frowned. "I believe I do understand…THAT YOU'VE GOT YOUR SICK AND TWISTED CAP ON!"

In the next second the bobble head was yanked out of the tub of water and swung at the analyst's head, connecting hard.

"What has gotten into you?!" Kowalski exclaimed, sitting up and rubbing his head.

"I know what you're trying to do! You stay away from us, you hear? Far away!" Private yelled, bolting out of the bathroom with the doll.

"What on earth did he think I was trying to do!"

"Ey wha g'non?" Rico walked in, pointing in the direction the freaked out private went in.

Kowalski exploded. "Before you comment on ANY of the matters being had here, let me just get ONE thing through your thoughts! That bobble head woman isn't real, DO YOU HEAR ME? SHE'S NOT REAL AND SHE'S DRIVING EVERYONE CRAZY! WHO'S SANE NOW HUH? WHO'S SANE NOW?"

The analyst made a hasty exit out of the lavatory.

"Eh me?" Rico asked and cheered. "Woohoo! Yeh! Me!"


Yes, Rico, you are the sane one. Mwaha.