This is in Emily's POV
"Please Em can we watch it?" Alison pouted at me for what seems like the 100th time now. We were currently sitting on my couch, home alone while my mom was out shopping for Christmas, picking a movie to watch. I wanted to watch Rudolph the red nose reindeer but Alison was practically begging me to watch Meet me in St. Louis, clutching the movie against her chest.
"But I don't want to watch a musical and it's sad too" I pouted right back. Alison drops the movie only to take my hands in hers.
"So is Rudolph, apart from the musical, but still sad. Please Em this is my favorite movie and we haven't watched it once this Christmas because I've been nice and let you pick, but don't you think it's my turn now to pick?" She pleaded once more squeezing my hand with every word she spoke.
It's true though she has let me pick my favorite Christmas movies to watch. Usually we alternate between all of our friends but lately it's been Alison and I watching by ourselves, and she's graciously let me pick the movies.
"Fine but only because I love you" I say without thinking, the words smoothly come out of my mouth no hesitation what so ever.
Alison just stares at me with a small smile while I can feel a blush slowly creep up my neck towards my ears burning with embarrassment. I can't even look at her I'm so embarrassed.
"I love you too Em your my best friend and well-" she stutters as she quickly clears her throat before finishing "don't tell the others but your my favorite...you've always been my favorite." She says while staring directly into my eyes practically baring herself to me and then it was gone. In a blink of an eye whatever emotion she had has vanished just as quickly as they appeared.
"So I'm going to go put the movie in ok" I can only nod my head too afraid I might let something else slip from my mouth. I'm not confused anymore I now know that I'm in love with my best friend and I know that that is wrong and I shouldn't be having these feelings for my best friend, much less a girl, but I can't help it she does things to me that I can't even explain. It's like I become someone else whenever I'm around her. I wish that I could wish these feelings away for them to just disappear like they never existed. Like I never was in love with Alison, but life is cruel that way. Of course I'd fall in love with a girl, whom is my best friend, whom is the queen bee of Rosewood High, and whom is the cruelest but also the sweetest person I know. To most people including our friends she is the cruel Alison but when it's just the two of us she shows this kind side to her that I've come to love. It's like all her walls fall down and she can be care free; you know when your like a kid skipping through a field of daisies with not a care in the world just there running, jumping, and falling down laughing because it's the greatest feeling in the world; that is the Alison I see when we're alone together not the girl who hides behind a mask.
"Don't get mad if I fall asleep through this movie" I say as Alison makes her way back to me.
"You better not or else" she playfully replies hitting me on the head with one of the many pillows my mother has for the couches.
Half way through the movie Alison decided to lay across the couch we are sitting on with her head resting on my lap, I held my breath and prayed she wouldn't look up towards me where she would see the faint blush that has spread across my face, I tried to keep my legs from shaking but that in itself seems to be the most difficult task in the world. Alison must felt my legs shaking underneath her head for she looked up at me and said "Em? Are you cold?"
"Um yeah a bit" I managed to reply
"Here lay across the couch with your head pressed against the arm of the chair" She says as she gets up off the couch to let me lay down like she instructed. After I did what she asked I looked up at her in confusion. "Ali where are you going to sit? This is the best place to watch the Tv."
"Right here with you sweetie-" Alison lied down practically on top of me with her head on top of my chest and her hand wrapped around my waist "Now hush your making me miss my favorite movie." I'm pretty sure Alison could hear my heart beating a mile a minute and I laid there frozen not sure what to do with my hands that are stuck to the side of my body.
"You know you can just wrap your arms around me if you want. Besides I always wanted a cuddle buddy to watch this movie with me and who better it be than you" Alison says as she barely lifts her head off my chest her chin gently touching my skin as she gives me one of the most breath taking smiles she has yet to give me. I can only shallow hard as she goes back to resting her head on my chest. Working up my nerves I took my right arm and wrapped it around the small of her back and took her hand that was lying on my hip and held it with mine. "This is nice" she says before once again losing herself into the her favorite movie while I lost myself in the warmth of having Alison in my arms.
"Oh this is my favorite part! Em I love this part!" Alison says as she gets up to sit on my legs totally invested into the movie. Judy Garland was about to sing Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas to her younger sister. Alison's all time favorite scene of this movie, which I don't blame her it's mine as well Judy Garland voice is amazing and nobody else can sing this song like her just the emotions she brings to it make it that special, she's always quick to tell me that. Normally the other girls would give her crap because she always announces it every time we watch this movie. I just smile at her. Admiring the side of the her face, watching how her eyes twinkle with admiration, how the very ends of her lips rise to a small smile as Judy Garland sings.
"I know I haven't forgotten" I say gently still staring at Alison. She slowly turns her head towards me looking at me questionably, since I usually stay quiet not wanting to disturb her while she watches her favorite scene. "I love it too" I say not sure if I'm actually talking about the scene or watching the way Alison lights up like a Christmas tree as she watches it. Alison just stares at me looking into my eyes as if she just found something that was once lost. Without either one of us noticing we started inching closer to one other are lips just centimeters away with the sound of Judy Garland singing echoing around us like that song was made for us in this life-like movie we made for ourselves.
~Alarm Ringing~
I abruptly sat up from my bed breathing heavily from the dream I just had. I quickly reached over to shut off my alarm and remove the covers from being on top of me as I sat on my bed with my feet placed on the floor. I keep having that dream of Alison and I where we almost kissed before my mother came home and ruined the moment. I practically threw Alison to the floor when I heard the front door opening with my mother announcing her return home from the grocery store. It's been two years since she's vanished and not a day goes by where I don't miss her still hoping she'll turn up. Barging through my room like she used too laughing as she apologized for scaring me once again. I searched for her endlessly those first few months never giving up and even when others did I kept going kept looking for her. Every blonde girl I saw I would run up to them yelling "Alison" at them only to be disappointed that that wasn't the set of blonde hair I was looking for. My friends and family didn't understand why I kept searching until one night I got really emotional and spilled my guts to them about being gay and in love with Alison. My friends and father took it well giving me the support I so desperately needed at a time like that. My mother on the other hand needed some time but she eventually came around when she realized how hopelessly in love and devoted I was to Alison, she talked to me about being gay and how I should move on from Alison to start living again and it may suck right now but it'll eventually get better.
She was right I started dating Maya and it was good until she got in trouble for smoking pot and got sent away. We promised to stay together but I came to realize that staying faithful was something Maya didn't do, that and leaving without saying goodbye to me like I meant nothing to her. Then came Samara but she was older and had other dreams of accomplishing then having a serious relationship. I dated a few girls after that but none of them were Alison, none of them thrilled me the way Alison had, while they gave me sparks Alison set me on fire from one small smile or one little look she would throw my way. Even after these two years I was still in love with my best friend and I'll probably always be.
"Ugh why can't you get out of my head. Get out, get out, please" I say to myself softly knocking the side of my head with my hand.
"Emily your going to be late to school!" My mom yells from down stairs. I slowly rise from my bed and get ready for the day.
"Sleep ok?" My mother asked as she does every morning when she sees me.
"Yeah I kinda went to be late finishing some homework" I reply before taking a bite out of my toast.
"Oh, what homework was that?"
"Just some math and an English paper on Romeo and Juilet." I say while rolling my eyes at the last part of my sentence. My mother just laughs at me.
"Don't take it personal Emmy high school is all about having more than one relationship. This isn't the fifties where you went to school to find your husband or wife" My mom says with a small smirk as she said wife. I'm so glad my mom has come around to me being gay cause now she can joke around with me without feeling uncomfortable.
"Ha Ha mom. I'm not mad about not being in a relationship 'cause I don't want one. It's just that I'm tired of having to read and write a report about star crossed lovers blah blah blah" I reply back while rolling my eyes once more.
"Yeah it is pretty tiresome but you got to do it." she says while shrugging her shoulders.
"Gee thanks Mom that really made me feel better" I say sarcastically
"Oh shush. Go before your late and don't forget that after school we head to the airport for LA" My mother reminds me. We're going to LA to visit UCLA since there one of the schools offering me a scholarship for swimming.
"Alright see you later"
"So is Pagie still hung up on you?" Hanna asks as we sit at our lunch table outside in the court yard.
"Nah I think she's finally over it. Why?" I ask. Pagie has had a thing for me since last year, before she came out to her parents, but she sure had a funny way of showing it since she dunked my head under water for taking her spot as the anchor of our rely race. Then she kissed me after the rely in my car before jumping out telling me not too tell. We went on one date to see if it could work out but I couldn't get passed her dunking my head under water and I know that's not the first time shes gotten mad and gotten physical for losing to someone or just being mad. I didn't want to be in that kind of relationship so I told her maybe it was best if we remained friends.
"Apparently she got accepted to UCLA as well" Hanna says. Aria nearly spits out her water when she heard what Hanna said.
"Shut up!" Aria says
"Figures she would apply to all the schools you applied to" Spencer's says while picking at her salad with her fork.
"Yeah I already knew. The coach from UCLA was looking at the both of us since we're the best swimmers in Rosewood." I say nonchalantly before eating my salad.
"What are you talking about Em YOUR the best swimmer in Rosewood - No the state. Pagie is no where near your level" Hanna says with Aria and Spencer agreeing.
"Speaking of UCLA when do you leave?" Spencer asked
"Right after school" The rest of lunch period we mostly talked about me leaving and to bring back gifts. That was mostly Hanna since anytime one of us leaves she demands that we bring her back something.
"So what do you think? Can you picture yourself going here?" My mom asked. We just finished our tour of UCLA and I got to say I really like it.
"Oh yeah definitely" I say. My mom goes off talking about the campus and how wonderful of a school this is but I stop paying attention when I spot a familiar set of blonde hair in front of me. It couldn't be. I keep watching her as she crouches down to pick up a little boy in her arms slowly turning towards one of the buildings walking towards it with the little boy in her arms talking animatedly.
"Alison" I whisper out.
'What was that Emmy?" my mother asks me looking towards the direction I was staring at.
"Did you see someone you know?"
"No I thought I did but it probably wasn't. Now what were you saying?"
"Oh, that we have to go speak to the coach the girl said he'll be at the pool since its practice time for the swimmers." My mother and I walk to the building where I thought I saw Alison walk through.
We met the coach and he was happy to see me. He gave me the low down of how practice here works and showed me around the natatorium before we were back alongside of the pool.
"So what do you think?" He asks. "Do you think you can hang?" He asks with a chuckle bubbling on his lips.
"Definitely. This place is great!" Him and my mother laugh at my admission,
"Tomorrow we have a meet I want you and your mother to come watch. Go pick your tickets up at the office down the hall from the entrance tell them that coach Fulton sent you since I don't know which girl is there." He explains. My mom tells me to go get them since she stills has some questions for coach Fulton.
"Hi I'm here to pick up some tickets Coach Fulton sent me" I say to the girl sitting at the desk.
"Oh ok go into the room down on the right Ms. Fields will help you out." I let out a small laugh and the girl sitting at the desk just looks at me weirdly.
"Sorry I wasn't laughing at you just the name. That's my last name as well." I explain
"Oh, yeah that's not a very common last name pretty cool if you ask me" She says while nodding her head as if she's agreeing with herself.
"Yeah it is. The room down to the right?" She just nods her head at me answering the phone that began to ring.
As I got closer I could hear the woman inside talking to someone. "Emilio behave I'm not going to tell you again" says the lady behind the door. "Ok mommy" came the reply.
Cute she brought her son to work. I knock on the door hearing a "Come in" as a reply.
"Hi Coach Fulton sent me to pick-" I forgot what I was going to say as I saw who was sitting behind the desk with the same little boy I saw outside off to the right corner of the office playing with his blocks. It couldn't be. It can't be her.
"Alison!?"
"Emily!?"
