The fucked up thing was that he recognized how much better he was for it. How his life was only going to, hopefully, trend in the right direction simply because some kind of sea monster happened to wash up on the shore of his tiny, coastal village and destroyed the life he'd known up to that point. It wasn't a good life. Not a great one. You rose, you worked, you ate what you worked for, then you slept until it was time to do it again.

Anyone who left the village typically was never heard of again. Not because they necessarily had had something terrible befall them, but rather because who wanted to even think of that place? Once you got out of it? Who wanted to think of their parents wasting away in the salty air, living every day with the same outlook as the last?

There was nothing there, in Shadesbay. There never would have been. Leaving it was the best thing that had ever happened to Ravan.

But the reason that he left it, the reason that he got to live the life he was currently, was only because his parents had been killed. Because that sea monster killed them. Where that not to have happened literally in the exact situation it did, with Erza coming down and all, he'd probably still be there. Working day in and day out. In a few years, he'd probably end up with one of the girls from the village and have kids of his own and work until he was too old to work.

And not think anything of it.

Now though, he was in Magnolia, in Fairy Tail, with a whole world of opportunity opened before him that he never even knew existed. He was training with one of the top mages around, one of the best swordswomen, and taking jobs for the top guild in the kingdom.

So why was he miserable all the time?

Ravan didn't know. He didn't get it. It felt a lot of times like he was in the wrong place. Doing the wrong thing. He didn't fit in and it showed. Fairy Tail didn't need him and he was just in the way. The other kids in the guild seemed to all detest him for a litany of (reasonable) reasons, most of the adults saw him as a nuisance, and he was just so alone. In the horde of Fairy Tail members, he at best got along with his brother and his brother's friend. That was it.

It was as embarrassing as it was revealing.

But the more that he recognized himself as being alone, the less Ravan wanted to interact with the others. It wasn't that he didn't see the detriment that he was causing mostly to himself and it wasn't even that he didn't care. He did care. A lot. It was just that...that… The more everyone rejected his shittiness, the shittier he became, as if to spite them. A vicious cycle. He could feel himself becoming more hateful, but he felt powerless to it.

Erza, in all the infinite wisdom she claimed to possess, seemed unable to provide him any guidance in this. She felt as if inner peace and redemption was found solely through self-reflection and the most she could do for Ravan was provide him avenues for his inner demons.

"You will only end up on the ground again," she said often as he would glare up at where she stood, smug, so perfect, so fucking annoyingly, disapprovingly, looking right down into his eyes, "if you continue to lose focus, Ravan. Now rise. Dust off. Then try again."

Sometimes he would.

Other times he growl that he hated her and her stupid training and he didn't need her anyways. She wasn't helping him learn anything. At all.

Then he'd run off. It used to be just around the city, aimless and lost, but the guild children were given a place for just such situations. The clubhouse, however, wasn't always a safe space for the boy. The others were typically around and that was never fun because he hated them, all of them, and man, he was glad, when he arrived at it, one day in particular, when Erza was being extra hard on him for no reason.

Well, some reason.

He'd returned unsuccessful from a job. He'd never done that before, come back that way. This main relied on the fact that, up to this point, most of the jobs he took were rather 'safe'. Hard to screw up on. Either that or, if they were bigger and more elaborate, done in conjunction with the slayer kids. He'd only recently begun to take complex solo jobs. He twelve and that meant that the Master might start considering him S-Class material and Ravan wasn't even sure if he wanted that, if he even cared about that, but Erza seemed so excited about it. She cautioned that he definitely wouldn't be in consideration, no way, not for a long time, but if he started now, showing himself, proving himself, then maybe, one day, like her, he could only be a teen, yet considered one of the top wizards in the guild. Wouldn't he want that?

He wasn't sure. But he knew she wanted it. And that meant something. Again, he didn't know what it meant, but it meant something to him. He wanted to impress Erza. For some reason. He wanted her to think that he was strong and competent and he didn't want to just get drug along on S-Class jobs with her; he wanted to take those jobs from her.

But it was hard. He didn't rely on spells or his daddy's stupid power, like all the slayer kids did. No. His magic was at a basic level. His reequip was hardly even big enough for armor. No. Just weapons. He was trained in weapons. Well. And he wasn't stupid like the rest of them. That was a big part of jobs. The mental aspect. His social skills weren't great, fine, but his deductions were typically sound.

But he fucked up. Over estimated. And had to make the long trek back to Magnolia, empty handed and defeated.

"Oh, it's okay, Ravan," Mirajane assured him with a smile as he reported back at the hall unsuccessful. "I'll just tack the job back up and someone else will handle it, I'm sure. It happens."

But it hadn't happened, before that. Not to him, at least. And, as he approached home, the last thing he wanted to do was explain to Erza how it had come about.

She was not pleased, nor amused, but only shook her head some. Didn't even say anything. Just shook her head at him. Because she was disappointed. Again. Only this time, it wasn't about something stupid like training in the backyard, him skipping out on chores, or her finding out he was treating his brother like the idiot his brother, honestly, was. No. She was disappointed because the one thing he was there to do, the only thing she really wanted from him, he'd been unable.

He'd failed.

Again.

Because, really, honestly, he failed all the time. At everything. His magic was nowhere near the level of the other kids, he wasn't close to being as smart as them, his behavior was never not shit, and, fine, he was okay with his weapons, but her level? Not even close.

He should have never come to Magnolia.

He ran from the house that day, through the streets and to the forest where he easily and thankfully found the empty clubhouse. He needed to be alone for awhile. A long while.

But he was busy doing that when it happened. He could sense her easily as she approached. Haven. She didn't have an immense magical presence, not like Erza or anything, but rather the air had a way of turning when she was near as she absorbed the static in the air, every bit of it. She didn't have a lacrima, like her father, to allow storage and instead seemed to constantly require a stream of it.

Ravan didn't know what came over him. Haven wasn't even coming there for him. Of course not. She'd been gone too, on a job with Locke and Navi, and was probably just returning home. She'd have no idea that he'd returned unsuccessful from his own. There was no way she had any intention of doing anything to him or even cared about him in that moment.

But it didn't matter.

Out of all the kids that Ravan hated, Haven was by far the worst. He hated Locke and Navi because of things he perceived about them, but he hated Haven because of things he knew. She was a spoiled little shit who didn't realize how fucking lucky she was. At all.

Haven constantly bitched and moaned about how horrible her father and mother were because… No reason. At all. Just because she was a brat. She thought it was annoying that her parents loved her and was openly claimed hatred for anyone who dared not think the exact same way as her. With no repercussions. At all.

The worst part though? Of her? Of the whole thing?

She did it all under the guise of being rebellious. Of being broken. Of being held back and held down and forced to confirm, but resisting.

Of all the things that he actually was and...and...and..

"Ra- What are you doing? Hey!"

He attacked her. The second she opened the door to the clubhouse, he pounced on Haven, tackling her to the ground. This didn't last for long, of course, and she was fighting back, as she always would, but something was different. Off. The kids always fought with ferocity, but Ravan wasn't letting up. He seemed to be seriously upset about something. When he summoned a blade and, instead of just threatening to cut her up, literally sliced her arm, Haven knew that she was in trouble.

"What's wrong with you?" she growled in shock, but he was swinging wildly at her again and Haven wasn't looking for anymore scars. No. If they were gonna fight to the death, then it was gonna be his.

It was with a loud crack that Haven expelled all of her remaining magical energy, all at once. There wasn't a lot, honestly, at the moment. She'd just returned, after all, from a job. But she sent what she could into a huge bolt that flowed from her right arm and Ravan didn't even seem to have time to dodge it. They were that close.

His cry was piercing and sharp as he collapsed to the hard dirt ground, dropping his favorite blade from his clutches. Haven was weak herself, now out of magical power, and could only heave heavily as she almost fell over as well. Almost. Catching herself at the last possible second, she glared down at where the boy laid, convulsing for a few seconds before just settling out.

Going over to his fallen weapon, she only picked it up, gripping the hilt tightly, before going to lord over the other child.

"I," she said as she pressed a foot against his singed check, the tip of the sword near his neck, "win."

But as his eyes opened, they were still trapped in a glare.

"Do it," he challenged weakly as Haven only frowned.

"What?"

"Do it." His voice was less shaky that time. It was almost an order. "Kill me."

She tossed the sword away then, away from both of them, and took a step back. "You're crazy, Ravan."

"You're a coward."

"Why would you want me to murder you?"

"You won't do it, will you?"

"You need help." She was taking more steps away then. "Did something happen?"

But he only sat up gingerly, refusing to look at her.

Something happened, alright. Something always happened. To him. Only him. Everything bad only ever happened to him and it wasn't fair. Everything he went through was just that; what he went through. Alone. He didn't have the Salamander as a father, to listen to you whine about how useless you were. Or Black Steel to help him get stronger. Or Raijin there to support him and make sure that he got everything he needed to succeed.

No.

It was just Ravan alone. Trying to do what he needed to do. All by himself.

All he wanted was for Erza to be pleased with him. Truly pleased with him. But it just never happened. It couldn't happen. Because he was never going to be the best. Not as long as the slayer kids were there to mess it all up.

If Haven felt out of place before, with the whole literally goading her to kill him thing, then when Ravan started tearing up, she was completely lost then.

"Do...do you want me to get somebody? For you?" Blood was still dripping warmly down her arm, but Haven hardly felt the sting. Only stared at the other child. "Erza? I can go get her, I guess, if-"

"No, don't!" He tried to sound commanding then, but it came out through a choking sob and he was a failure.

The biggest failure.

Haven wanted to. To get Erza. Someone. Her mother, maybe. Because she had no idea what to do now. But...what if they thought her shocking him so much has been what made him all, well, weepy? She didn't want to get in trouble. Not when she was gonna get praised real big by her father that night, probably, for how great she'd done on her job.

Slowly, she took steps forwards again and, getting on her knees before the boy, she reached out to pat at her shoulder, but he only shoved her away.

"Ravan-"

"Just go!"

"No." Frowning, she asked, "Why are you being like this?"

The kids fought. All of them. A lot. She'd even argued with Locke so much before that the boy cried about it, to his mother. But not like this. And only when they were little kids. Not now. No way. And nothing like what Ravan was doing. She'd never seen someone breakdown like he was currently.

"Like you would understand! Just go away, Haven. I don't want you here."

She didn't exactly want to be there either, but she was. Which could be solved, yeah, by just leaving him. She had every right to. He'd attacked her for literally no reason, she'd only defended herself, and now it was over. It was done.

But…

Sitting back on her butt, Haven pulled her knees to her chest as she only stared straight ahead, right at the boy as he softly began to cry into his palms, unsuccessful in any attempt to hide his tears or pain.

Eventually, all his tears dried up and he felt much the same, inside and out. Sitting there with his legs crossed, he stared down at his lap silently as the sun only continued to set around them, the two children as alone as they had been for at least an hour. Eventually, Ravan lifted hie eyes to meet Haven's, still just there, watching him.

"I didn't," he told her softly, "finish my job. I failed."

"Oh." Haven wasn't sure how that was relevant to anything. "Okay."

"What do you mean? Huh? Okay? It's not okay. It's-"

"You should have come with us. We finished ours."

"Shut up." Huffing then, his eyes fell once more. "I needed this job, but I wasn't able to do it. To fnish it. Now… Now Erza's gonna think..."

"Why do you care what Erza thinks?"

"Why do you care what Master thinks?"

"I don't," Have told him simply though she was actually kind of bummed that it was getting close to dinner time, when she'd be able to tell the man all about what she'd done, but there she was, sitting around with stupid Ravan. "At all."

"Shut up, Haven."

"Stop telling me that."

"Then-"

"I'm trying to be nice, Ravan. Trying really hard. And you're-"

"Why? Huh? What do you care? You hate me, remember."

"You hate me."

"Yeah, and I'm not pretending like I don't."

Huffing, Haven finally looked away. "You're so stupid."

"I'm stupid?"

"Yeah."

"You're the one-"

"Erza's not mad at you. Or whatever. She's probably just glad that you came back. Like how Laxus would be if I didn't finish a job."

"What do you know? Huh? About Erza? Nothing. So shut your mouth."

"I know a lot, actually." About everything. Or at least she felt that she did. Still, looking back at him, she added, "Erza wouldn't want you to, like, die, Ravan. For not completing a job. She doesn't' complete them, sometimes, even. So-"

"I didn't say that she did."

"Then why did you want me to kill you so badly?"

"I didn't."

"You clearly did."

"Just… Don't tell anyone about that." They were staring at one another again, the pair were. "Not even Locke. Or your father. Or-"

"I won't."

"Haven-"

"If I say I won't, Ravan, then I won't."

Nodding then, he fell back, finally, against the ground. He wouldn't be able to go back to Erza's. Not for awhile. Haven's spell had really sent a heavy charge through him. On top of his already depleted magic and heightened emotions, he was spent.

She was as well, the oldest Dreyar girl was, but she also had somewhere to be. She was late to dinner, fine, but was it even really dinner before the best mage around arrived? Laxus would tell her, at this, later at home, that it wasn't, but he'd been there the whole time. Then they'd argue.

Haven didn't want to admit just how much she was looking forwards to it.

Shoving up from the ground, she held down her grimace as she went to, once more, stand over the boy, As she looked straight down into his eyes, the girl said, "If anything's gonna kill you, Ravan, it's gonna be my lightning. So don't go around asking anyone else. I call dibs."

He wanted to shove at her, but she was already walking away, first into the clubhouse, where she spent some time bandaging her wound before coming back out to toss gauze and ointment at him. There were no more words spoken between the two of them that night, but there didn't need to be. Ravan listened to her departure in silence as, slowly, the air felt much more breathable.

Erza would be waiting for him, the next morning, with a full list of household chores, and Ravan only nodded his head down at the ground, just thankful the woman didn't mention the extra wounds he came home sporting.

The next time he saw Haven, she made no mention of the incident from the day before. She didn't say anything, really, to him. Not even as Locke took exception to the way Ravan just interjected himself into the conversation and then they were arguing, there, in the guildhall, but for once, Haven only sat beside Navi, saying nothing. The younger girl was curious about this, but Haven offered no explanation and, well, no one questioned her much. Or else the blonde would find a desire to quarrel.

"You don't have to be nice to me now. You know."

Ravan grumbled this a few days later when, still, no matter the goading, Haven hadn't so much as said a bad word to him. Locke had. Locke always would. But Haven…

Something was different.

They were alone at the clubhouse again, the pair were. Haven was already there when he arrived, hiding out from her father who was really pissy about something super dumb (because to Haven, getting upset with her tormenting Marin was really dumb), but Navi was busy babysitting her brothers and Locke was training, alone, with his father. So it was just them. Ravan and Haven.

He didn't know it at the time, but this would eventually become more of a norm than not.

"I'm nice to everyone."

He frowned at Haven, but she wouldn't look at him. It was a rainy, gross day out, so they were hiding out inside the little house, Haven seated at the old table, some magic books spread about, while Ravan sat with his back against a while, mostly pouting about nothing. They would have been fighting by that point, the two of them, under a normal circumstance, but they seemed to be playing by different rules now. Ones that he wasn't sure how he felt about.

"You're not nice to anyone."

"Then why are you saying I am?"

"I dunno. Why are you being nice to me?"

"I'm not." Then she paused. "Except for I am, I guess, because I'm nice to everyone."

He tried hard not to groan.

"Stop treating me weird then," Ravan corrected then. "And you are, you know. Different than before. I'm not, like, some sort of wounded person. I'm not sick or hurt or anything. I'm just me."

"What do you want?" Finally, she glanced over from the table with a bit of a frown. "From me?"

"I want..." To argue. To fight. To be...how they always were. The tension that was usually around them, that usually led to such things, had shifted into some sort of terse truce that hung around them harshly. And he was sick of it. "I'm not your friend."

"Okay." Haven even shrugged. "I don't remember asking you to be."

"I'm not Locke. Or Navi."

"Gross. Good." She jumped up then, slamming the heavy tome shut as she frowned over at them. "Navi sucks. And so does Locke."

Mainly because they'd both had things other to do, that day, than be bossed around by her. The audacity.

"And I'm not the one being different." Coming over to him, she glared down at the boy where he sat. "I kicked your ass, Ravan, and you're sitting here whining about how you don't wanna be friends. Are you gonna cry again? You're different. Not me. Crybaby."

He shoved up then and he was much like Locke, quickly out pacing her physically, but not nearly to the same extent. Gajeel was seeing to Locke's weight training, but Erza found the best quality in a knight was his ability to move swiftly and concisely. He wasn't bulking up quite the same way as the Redfox boy and, even, just didn't seem to be hitting heights at the same pace. It made him much easier for Haven to still knock around, anyways, and she preferred it.

As they glared at one another, she was no longer taller than him, but their eyes were about even, but there was something missing in both pairs. The darkness. It had always been there, between the two of them. The first time they met, after all, Ravan was trying to rob Haven's father. And though she could see the desire one might have to ruin the man's day, she actually did have something of a moral code. Which he continued to violate every step of the way. Though the pair could work, in a group, competently, it was usually just a ticking time bomb that was slated to go off at any moment. They'd never had a true conversation and never once actually thought the other as anything more than an adversary.

Something changed that day though, when he sliced her arm and Haven nearly electrocuted him. Their views of one another had always been based on one another's worst qualities, but there was far more to both children than just their horrible attitudes. They just weren't good at expressing their other attributes, not looking deeply at another's.

Haven and Ravan were far closer to being the same than they were different. It was what always drove a wedge between them.

But when he shoved her then and she shoved him back, there was no malice there and Haven even smiled, maybe, and he never did that, but maybe he kind of did too. Maybe. At the very least, as the sky cleared up and they took to training outside, together, not fighting, not tussling, but legitimately training with one another rather than hoping secretly to injure the other, neither complained too much about how things had changed. How they were different. They wouldn't again. Not to one another.

Which wasn't to say they never argued. Never hated one another. Never viciously fought again. Because they did. And would. Always. But it wasn't their standard position in relation to the other. It felt...good. To Ravan.

Erza noted a change in his attitude and responded well to it, a few days later.

"You're not as mopey," she said as in congratulations and he only gave her a glare then, but she ignored it. "As you should not be. It is time for you to take a new job."

He didn't want to. At all. Not after he'd failed at the last one. But Erza insisted and, well, the other kids were all off on one once more, so if he was going, then it had to be alone. Like last time.

She went with him, down to the hall, but seemed more focused on Kai, who was being his typical annoying self. Ravan just stood before the board though, glancing over the different jobs. It would be so easy, so very easy, to just snatch up one of the lower level ones. One of the ones he'd spent so long taking. So long acing. Rather than a complex, drawn out one that he had the risk of...of…failing.

So easy.

And yet…

"Make sure you bring some extra jewels with you," Lisanna giggled when he brought it over to her to be filled. "This is pretty far. Are you going alone?"

When he nodded, the woman smiled and reminded him to stay safe. Then he went over to bid his brother goodbye.

"Kai," he complained when the other boy wrapped his arms tightly around him. "Knock it off!"

"I'll miss you," the younger boy insisted, as he always did. Even if Ravan was only going a few towns over. "A lot."

Ravan wouldn't him.

Still, he patted his brother on the back, just to get him to release him, before looking to Erza. She only nodded though.

"I hope to be home," she said simply, "when you return."

She wouldn't be, when he did, but once she was, the woman was pleased to learn it had gone well. And that, not waiting another moment, he'd gone right back out on another one. He knew the idea would only make her even more proud.

It was all he wanted, really.

Erza wasn't hard to draw praise from, but she was just as easy to draw criticism. One had a far higher affect on him, but seemed to be just as frequent on the lips of his mentor. She just had high standards, which she wanted met, by him, at all times. Erza was tough.

But fair.

He knew his faults and shortcomings were, literally, his. To be angry that she took note of them would be childish. Which he was slowly becoming less of. A child.

"Look at you. A man now, if I've ever seen one."

Jellal sounded presently surprised, but not nearly as much as Ravan was to see the man there. He arrived home one day, sometime after his fourteenth birthday, to Erza's boyfriend seated at the kitchen table, like it was nothing.

The man had actually been around a few times, that year, but Ravan was always gone, on jobs, then. Kai would always have tons of stories to share about the man, but Ravan would only roll his eyes and pretend to not enjoy hearing them.

Jellal was nowhere close to as important in his life as Erza, but he was a part of the woman, in a strange way, and Ravan felt kind of...protective over her. Maybe. Sort of. Jellal probably actually knew her a lot better, way better, but Ravan felt like he was a far bigger staple in her life currently than the man. He had no reason to distrust Jellal, and he didn't, honest, but he knew it still had to hurt Erza, at least a little. Their relationship. Ravan was nowhere close to be an authority on it, but…

"Awe," Haven mocked him one day at the clubhouse where, after training, they both just sat in the grass, talking. They did that then. Like friends. It's what they were then. More than ever before. "Are you jealous?"

"Shut up."

"Do you, like, have a crush on Erza or something?"

"Don't be gross." He wasn't entertained. At all. Still, she only snickered at him.

"Imagine," she kept right up, "thinking that this whole time Erza's been so depressed, without her boyfriend, you've been right there-"

"Haven."

She wasn't laughing any longer, instead only falling back into the warm grass blades, blinking up at the blue sky above them. "It is weird, I guess. The way he just pops back up sometimes. You'd think they'd be bored of one another by now, anyways. I'd be bored of it."

"You don't know anything about it."

"I know plenty." About everything. Always. "Caring that much about someone is dumb, anyways. That you just, what? Only live half your life? Until they're back around, for what? A minute? Half a year? It's stupid."

"You just don't get it."

"Then what are you whining about?"

"I'm not whining about anything." He let out a short huff. "I'm just talking."

"Then stop talking about it," she decided for him. She was great at that. Deciding things for others. "If Erza isn't bothered by it, you shouldn't be."

He agreed to a certain extent, but it was easier said than done. In those days, Jellal didn't mystify the boy, but rather annoyed him some, when he was around. It was uncomfortable, anyways, as he understood more the hamper he put on Erza's rare chance to be around the man. Most of the time, if Jellal was around, he'd sleep in the clubhouse and order Kai over to Marin's.

The least they could give Erza, anyways, was privacy.

He felt that in ways that had nothing to do with the man as well though. A lot. As his jobs became his entire focus, the jewels they brought in became rather nice as well. When he was younger, it was easier to blow them on dumb things, but he was becoming less impulsive and far more disciplined. It was because of Haven, anyways, that a realization about it came over him one day.

"You're lucky," she grumbled to him one day as the pair sat with Locke and Navi up at the guildhall. The blonde was in the midst of her perpetual out with her father and was in a rather shitty attitude that day. Ravan had only just arrived back from a job and ordered something nice for dinner, at the bar, which prompted this response from the girl. "You can do whatever you want."

"What do you mean?" Locke frowned at her. "What don't you do? That you want to do?"

But she was ignoring him because he was on Laxus' side (annoying) and that meant she wouldn't talk to him for, at least, the entire day.

"You can move out whenever you want," she kept up speaking solely to Ravan. "You don't have dumb parents there to ruin it for you."

Which probably wasn't the best statement to make to an orphan, but was far better than some Haven had made in the past.

Ravan hadn't considered moving out of Erza's place in, oh, since the first year he moved in there. It was home. His home.

But she was right (as Haven felt she usually was). He was more than old enough to live on his own, could afford not only a room at the dormitory, but even a nice, small apartment in town. And if he saved some, maybe even a house eventually, in a few years. He saved that much over the years. And if he were truly working towards it, then…

"It wouldn't matter how far away I was," Navi sighed softly, just from the thought. "My dad and Happy would probably still show up. Everyday."

Haven had resolve though as she glared over at where Laxus was eating with the Thunder Legion. "I'll do it soon."

She wouldn't, there was no way that she was even close to be ready at thirteen, but she felt as if she were.

Locke only sighed though. "My dad never shuts up about how he was already self-sufficient by now. For a long time."

"Shut up." Haven didn't look at him. "No one cares. Traitor."

Ravan hardly listened to their argument though (Navi unfortunately had to, given she was stuck between them. He could focus on nothing other than what had just left the blonde's mouth.

"I could move out," he told Erza one day after she spent a good portion of it bitching at him and Kai about their cleanliness. Mostly over the state they'd left the single bathroom the home had in, while she'd been off on an S-Class job. "If that's what you want."

But he didn't yell it. Didn't say it as a threat or even seem to have been affected by her scolding (he'd been gone too; the mess was all his brother's). He was just sitting there, on the couch, as the words suddenly left his mouth. Erza only frowned at him tough, as she stood before the boy.

"What? Why would you do that?"

But he only shrugged.

He'd stumped her with his words though and Erza only left the room with little rebuttal or confirmation. Kai luckily didn't hear (he was busy scrubbing whatever that...stain was off the bathroom wall) because he'd have a lot to say, but it wasn't about him. No. It was about Ravan.

"You can do as you wish," Erza finally decided that night when she returned from her nightly workout to find the older boy sitting out on the front porch, reading over a comic. She'd taken a seat beside him, on the step, but didn't glance down at him. Only sat there. Always there, never far. "Ravan. I will not make a decision for you. Unless of course you wish to ask my opinion on a place. I've only ever stayed here and the dormitory, but I will be sure to speak with any landlord you have. Make sure they give you a fair take." She paused again, for a moment, before whispering, "But only if it's what you wish."

"Don't you want me to go?"

"If this is about the state of the house while I was out-"

"It's not."

"Then-"

"I have to move out eventually." His comic fell the side and he almost blushed, honestly, over it's presence. "And I can afford it. I can't stay forever."

"No," she agreed. "You can't."

"Then-"

"But I do not wish to see you leave until you are certain you are ready. There is no rush." Her eyes finally were on him then as she said simply, "Being adult is more than monetary, Ravan. Do not rush into it foolishly. Enjoy the freedoms that come before it. They will never return."

"Kai would miss me," he sighed, after a few moments of silent thought.

"Kai will be going with you."

And she meant it.

In that moment, at least.

"Besides," Erza sighed as she got to her feet. "There is much else you can do with your money. I do not wish to be the only one funding your weapon arsenal, you understand."

He did and didn't all at the same time.

She went with him though, the first time he decided that, perhaps, it was time to look into some armor.

"Something like mine?" she questioned and he didn't want to hurt her feelings, but not at all.

He didn't grow up wishing to be a knight, like Erza had as a kid, but rather foresaw himself as something much different.

His chest plate was solid black with only a red Fairy Tail emblem engraved across it and he didn't like the gauntlets much, so he ditched them early on, but fingerless gloves quickly became part of his attire. For better grip, he told Erza, on his weapons, but he knew that he just felt pretty cool, when he'd hold up a hand and clench it into a fist.

The coolest part though was the helmet that Erza 'helped' him design. By which he meant he only nodded along when she showed him a crude depiction of what he described, not letting on that it was utter shit. Still, she was the one with the armor connections (even if it only seemed to be Heart Kreuz; gross, he wasn't a chick). No need to piss her off.

The others teased him, the first time he wore his full gear out on a job, but Ravan found that he liked it there, in his helmet, where he could see them and they couldn't him. It covered his entire face and, other than when he pushed up the protection over the eyes, it was like looking out at the world from behind glass. Like he was separated from it. From others.

How he'd felt his whole life.

He found even wasn't wearing his helmet that he would tie a bandanna around his mouth or hide it frequently into his palm. A nervous thing, maybe, a safety blanket, probably, but it felt like he was keeping up the ruse of hiding all feelings, just because others couldn't see his mouth. His lips. Any emotion he might have.

He never felt cooler though than when, when he turned seventeen, he made a far bigger investment.

"Wow!" Navi was rare to stand so close to Ravan, but as he pulled up in front of the guild on his new motorcycle (well, new to him), she was quick to rush right over. "This is so awesome."

Locke only snorted though, arms crossed over his chest. "It's junk."

"It's is," Haven agreed, but she wasn't just be her typical ornery self. No. Rather, it was where Ravan had gotten the motorcycle that bothered her.

"It's old," Mirajane told Ravan as they stood out in the garage where the bike sat. "But he still fires it up sometimes. It shouldn't be in too bad shape. And I'll make you a great deal on it."

The woman had put up a flier in the hall about it being for sale and, though Laxus seemed to bite the head of anyone who inquired about it, when Ravan asked Mirajane to show it to him, she was quick to jump on it.

Cheap and thrilling was right up his alley though and Ravan knew if he wasn't quick about the purchase, someone else in the hall would snag it.

Haven was really mad at him though, for dealing with her parents.

"And because," she grumbled with a glare when, eventually, she took him off the silent treatment, "it was supposed to be mine."

That's what she felt. And had mentioned, apparently, to her parents, prompting Laxus to forbade it and Mirajane to try and sell it. Not because she didn't want her daughter to use it; but because she did not want to have to deal with the headache of arguments it was going to spawn between them.

Laxus wasn't pleased with this and he let it be known to Ravan, a few days later, when he called the boy into his office at the guild.

"Sit," Laxus growled at him and Ravan didn't respect many people outside of Erza, but he did try to his Master. "Now."

As he slipped into the chair, Laxus only huffed before going to claim the one behind the desk.

"Do you know why I asked you to come in here?" the slayer asked though he didn't give the boy a chance to answer. "Because you fucking bought my bike."

Ravan tried hard not to tremble.

Glaring at him, Laxus continued.

"It means a lot to me," the man went on. "A whole lot. I bought it when I was about your age. With my own, hard earned jewels. Full price. I worked my ass off for that thing and my wife handed over to you for next to nothing. You know why I did that? Huh? Do you?"

Ravan had a feeling it wasn't because the man liked him so much.

"Because," Laxus growled, "my daughter. There was no way I was gonna keep her off it much longer. So I gave it up. Because I care about her. And I don't want her spending time around something dangerous. Something that can hurt her."

The teen found it best not to mention she was a working mage who did many things that could hurt her and even seemed to enjoy the idea of it quite a bit.

"Do you understand what I'm telling you? Ravan?"

He swallowed some, but nodded. "That you don't want me to let Haven ride the-"

"No."

And then he knew. Because Laxus had expressed similar sentiments to him before. Twice. They were usually more direct though.

"Haven and I are just friends," he insisted, but Laxus only snorted and told him to fuck off.

"And leave my daughter alone," he added because he didn't like him. Ravan. The boy wasn't sure why (though, again, they had never gotten off on a great start either), but he could do little about it. Only jumped to his feet and headed right out the door.

Erza was waiting for him.

"What did the Master want?" she asked as Marin, using the fact her father was locked away in his office, rushed over with beers. No one tipped the janitor, after all. But the waitress… "Ravan?"

He only shrugged and the woman just sighed.

"Doesn't matter." She shoved up as Marin's face fell, realizing this would mean no tip. No matter. She was just as quickly setting her sites on the table beside theirs. "Do you wish to accompany me on my job?"

Anything to get out of that hall.

But he couldn't hate the Master too much. At all. It was because of him that he got his cheap bike (that wasn't so cheap in upkeep) and he didn't feel nearly as good anywhere else than on the bike of it, sliding through the streets of Magnolia late into the night.

It was so fucked up. All of it. To know that if his parents were still alive, if his village had stayed his home, he'd never have this. This freedom. This chance. This opportunity. This dream, as horrible as it felt at times, that he wouldn't change the world for. He hoped they'd be proud of him, that they'd understand why he loved it so much more, where he was currently. What he was doing currently. While the emblem on his chest felt so much more important than anything he left behind back there on the coast.

Fairy Tail was his entire life. He didn't know one without it any longer. And on late nights, when he tried to be quiet about coming in from a long few hours of burning magical energy on his bike, he couldn't help the smile his head against his bandanna as the light in Erza's bedroom only went out after the door was locked and he was inside.

Whether his parents would be proud or not, he knew someone was. Of him. Of what he was doing. That was all that mattered.


One more. The best for last, of course.