"I want you to be happy." He whispered.
"You don't want me to be happy." She whispered. "You want to be in control." His jaw clicked when his teeth clenched, attempting to not say a word. "If you really want to be in control, and be happy, Booth, if you want me to be happy? You would choose me over Hannah." She said, her tone absolutely serious. "I wouldn't leave you every week chasing down a story, I wouldn't let you wake up alone, and I would most certainly ensure that cocky grin never leaves your face. " She said as she stared into his eyes, waiting patiently for a response.
He straightened his spine, the near sarcasm in her voice caught him off guard, and he just stared at her for a few seconds. "Excuse me?" He said in a tone that expressed his seriousness quite clearly.
"If you want me to be happy, you would leave Hannah and be with me." She replied quite seriously, her eyes challenging him to argue. "I was sure that my request was clear." She said, watching his face scrunch up in confusion.
"You…" He cleared his throat and watched her eyes bore into his. "You rejected me." He said, as if that reply would say it all. His body began to involuntarily shake, as his eyes narrowed. "You rejected me, and then you ran from me."
"I didn't reject you." She replied. "I rejected the implication that our relationship would be a gamble." She said, facing him strongly. The anger he was showing was simply feeding into her words, her honesty. "I rejected you asking me to give this a try. I never rejected you. I rejected your offer."
"And how is what you're saying to me now any less of a gamble?" He replied.
"I'm not giving you an option for failure." She stated clearly. "I can ensure your happiness. Hannah cannot. If you say no, then the subject is dropped, but you get absolutely no say in what I do with my life in the future."
He was shocked by her words, her up front attitude, and the clear challenge in her eyes. He wasn't exactly discouraged, just surprised, and watched as she stepped toward him. "Bones." He whispered.
"May I ask you a question?" She asked, her voice low, she watched his eyebrows rise in curiosity. "Why did you agree to donate your sperm to me originally? What were you thinking when you were in that room? Besides the hallucinations… Did you think you were just doing a friend a favor? Did you think that you could get something out of it? Did you agree because you felt that if you were the father, I would have some piece of you?"
"Bones, stop."
"I want to know. I need to know. Was that another gamble? Why did you offer up a piece of you then, but now that you're with someone, you tell me that I can't do something that I know will make me happy. Why do you question my intentions now, but you didn't question them then? Why did you attack who I am as a person now, and not then?"
"I didn't attack you."
She was gaining confidence in spades, and he wasn't sure how to handle it. She was staring at him with an icy stare, and he could feel his body reacting. He could feel his stomach flipping, his heart racing. "You told me that I couldn't. You told me that I was emotionally unable to raise a child. Yet when you were the chosen donor, you told me that I would make a good mother. Which time were you lying to me?" She asked.
"Bones, we shouldn't be having this conversation here." He said, staring at her sternly, her eyes flickered around the room and settled back at him.
"Why? Are the anatomically correct pictures of genitalia making you feel inadequate?"
"Bones!" He exclaimed, seeing the satisfaction on her face at making him squirm. "Did you have me come here so that you could take another swing at me, or did you have me come here because you were having a panic attack?" He asked gruffly, watching a flash of pain in her eyes.
"I need to know the real reason that you don't approve of me having this procedure." She replied. "Is it because you want to be the person to impregnate me, or is it because you're such an unbelievable control freak, that you can't see me being happy without you? Because if either of those are the case, perhaps you should re-evaluate your relationship with a woman who puts so much sodium hypochlorate in her hair that it's possible she'll be bald by the time she reaches the age of forty."
Booth's face was becoming redder with each sharp stabbing word that slipped between his partner's lips. She was angry, but her sarcasm was biting like a hungry piranha, and she didn't look angry any longer. She looked relieved at what she was saying, as if what she was saying had been on her mind for far too long, and her eyes were so clear of guilt, that it almost frightened him. He wanted honesty, and he was getting it.
"Did I scare you with the big words, Booth?"
"That's enough!" He said finally. The only words he could think to say to her at that moment without revealing any answers to any of her questions. "Just… be quiet!" He said, taking deep breaths to try to calm himself, he could feel a sharp pain in his chest. He then saw it, the flash of pain in her eyes that he knew was hidden somewhere. It wasn't because he had told her to be quiet, it wasn't because he hadn't answered her questions, it was because she had said all she had wanted to say, and all she had left were hurtful words. "What, do you want me to say?"
"I want the truth. Then I want you to walk out of that door." She whispered.
"I don't know what to say." He said, his teeth clenched as he watched her eyes narrow.
She took a step forward, and she shook her head just a bit, keeping her eyes on his. "I remember when there was a time that you used this… to make decisions." She said, lifting her hand, she rapped her knuckle on his sternum and watched his eyes flicker down to her fingers, and back to her eyes. "It was sometimes slightly more accurate then when you used this." She said, moving her hand down, she rapped his stomach slightly, and never wavered from his eyes. "But you've never, ever been right when you've used this to make a decision." She said, reaching her hand down, she grabbed hold of his belt buckle and watched his eyes widen in shock as she yanked it hard. He emitted a yelp as he stood chest to chest with her, her eyes still narrowed, her hand still wrapped firmly around his belt buckle, she watched the shock melt from his face. "Where did you think I was going to grab, Booth?" She asked, watching that hard swallow as it made its way down his throat. "Don't yell at me. Don't treat me like I am a child, don't make it sound like my decisions are less important than yours. Don't roll your eyes, don't treat me like crap because you can't express your thoughts and feelings in a way that gets things through to the other person. If you have something to say to me, then say it to me." She said, moving to release her hand from the belt buckle, his hand reached down and grabbed it, and it was her turn to gasp.
"We are not having this conversation here." He said, holding her hand firmly. "Get your bag, get your coat on, and come with me." He paused. "Please."
Her eyes remained on him for a moment, and she could feel the blush in her cheeks at what she had done, the realization finally dawning on her.
He watched her eyes on his and could see her cheeks blushing, the anger turning to a demure, shy, anxiety. It was probably one of the most adorable moments he had seen from his partner, the way she reacted moments after getting all fired up, the way that her eyes flickered like a stubborn forest fire, the flames dying down, but the glowing embers still beneath. "If I go with you…"
"If you come with me, you'll get the answers you're looking for. I promise."
"Will I like these answers?"
"You will have to be the judge of that." He said, finally releasing her hand, she pulled it from his buckle and swallowed hard as he turned and grabbed her coat, opening it for her to step into, she looked up at him and he lifted it onto her arms, helping her to pull it closed, they spoke not a word as she cinched the tie on the coat tightly and stared at his chest as she shouldered her bag. "Are you ready?"
"Yes." She whispered, taking his offered hand, she kept her eyes on the floor in thought, as he led her silently from the room and toward the waiting car.
