AN: We are almost there Germany-I feel for ya!
Thanks to everyone who has reviewed :) You're all so great!
Four hours, two breaks and eight cups of coffee for America later, no one was paying much attention to the video on ocean currents that had been set up for them to watch. Normally by this point in a world summit, most of the nations were nodding off or texting their assistants, but today they were all just chatting away as if the video wasn't even playing.
Germany had been enjoying some relief from the migraine he had finally fought off twenty minutes ago when he heard Greece tell Japan, "Maybe we could get some more use of my kitty ears later. I'm a bad cat. A bad naughty cat."
His blue eyes shot open and he started to look around the room, taking in all of the conversations around him.
"I'm way too much of a hero for you old man."
"Watch your tone boy, I remember how to flog an unruly lad."
"I don't know Gil, syrup is really hard to get out of fabric."
"You'll drink the syrup and like it Mattie."
"I'm thinking that Joseph Haydn would be marvelous to listen to during the act."
"Are you insane, no way am I tying you up listening to that unoriginal court musician!"
"I'm a bad naughty kitty cat."
"You are a very disrespectful cat! Shame on you!"
France stood up and turned off the video since no one was paying attention to it any longer and he cared much more about the intimate lives of his friends than the silly ocean.
"This is quite fun, is it not?" he smirked in Germany's direction which cause some of the other nations to remember he was there and began pestering him once again.
The meeting was getting more out of hand by the minute and Germany felt another migraine coming along. By now, all of the nations were either asking him questions that he had no desire to answer or they were discussing amongst themselves different techniques that they had tried in the past few days.
Francis was just ecstatic that this entire situation had been completely turned to Germany and that no one really remembered how it all started—which meant that no one was blaming him. He could just sit back and watch the fun play out amongst the other nations.
Suddenly Germany shot out of his seat and bellowed "EVERYONE SHUT UP!"
The other nations all ceased talking immediately and turned to the de facto leader of their meeting. Most looked a little surprised at his outburst, only a few looked scared.
"This has gone on long enough!" Germany shouted. "I am not the Google searching of bondage! This must stop! In fact, just Googley search it yourself and stop asking me things! I don't want to know this much detail about any of your sex lives! I am done with you all! If we cannot have a normal meeting then there is no point in proceeding! Get it out of your systems and I will see everyone back here in the morning!"
Germany gathered his papers as the other nations continued to stare at him in silence.
"But Germany," came a soft voice from his left. The blonde nation turned to meet the violet eyes of Russia. "I still have a question about my magic metal pipe of pain—" he began, as the Baltic Trio began to shudder in the corner.
"NEIN!" Germany bellowed. At this point, he was so frustrated that he didn't even care about possibly offending the slightly unhinged Russia. He shoved his chair back under the table with the force of his pent-up anger and turned to stalk out of the room, not waiting for anyone—even Italy.
Unfortunately, France—being France—couldn't resist one more poke at the imposing nation as he stalked from the room.
"But Allemagne!" France called out to the retreating German's back, "I still need your opinion on nipple clamps!"
Germany's scream of rage could be heard from all the way down the hall.
Most of the remaining nations had decided that Germany most likely had a valid point in ending the discussions for the day and proceeded to a small pub down the street that France, Spain and Prussia frequented when in town and insisted had an excellent menu.
Each nation had a glass of their chosen poison in front of them, with the exception of Arthur who had four pints of a decent German brew surrounding him. England picked up the pint glass closest to him and downed almost the entire contents in one gulp. "I actually feel a bit bad for the poor chap. I didn't realize we were all pestering him."
The island nation felt an arm slide around his shoulder and looked up into America's incredibly blue eyes. "It's okay Iggy," Alfred said.
"Don't call me that," England muttered.
America didn't even pause, "who else would anyone talk to about that kind of kink, Ludwig is like, the total master!"
"Amerique is correct, Angleterre," France consented and he sipped his wine.
"I know, I know," the blonde Englishman said, "doesn't mean I don't feel ruddy well awful about it though." He grabbed the next pint and proceeded to swallow the entire contents of that glass as well.
Almost tentatively, America took the remaining two pints and pushed them towards Prussia who latched on to the free beer with delight. "Britain?" Alfred said quietly using his lover's more formal moniker, "slow down a bit babe, I have plans for you tonight." This earned him a quite saucy grin from his English boyfriend who restrained from ordering more.
Everyone still seemed a bit taken aback at the German's outburst and they began discussing what exactly had been the straw that broke The Ludwig's back.
"I hope it wasn't me," said Spain with a tinge of worry behind his eyes. Everyone knew that the Spaniard was more of a nation pleaser and prided himself on getting along with most everyone at the conferences.
Canada cleared his throat and said "I doubt it was you Spain," but no one seemed to hear him except Prussia who grinned at the be-speckled nation causing the Canadian to blush.
"Well," began France, "we all know it wasn't me. I did not ask a thing of poor dear Allemagne."
"Wasn't you?" England sputtered. "You started this whole mess with that blasted excuse for a novel."
"Mon ami, Angleterre," France oozed, "perhaps I may have begun the ball rolling, however I did not let the idea of a little innocent bondage overtake my entire personality unlike a very 'un-gentlemanly gentleman' I could name. The hotel's walls are quite thin mon ami."
England glared across the table at his frenemy. "You bloody froggy wanker stupid face!"
All of the nations burst out laughing at the Brit's poor attempts at insulting the Frenchman which only caused Arthur to get more agitated. He was practically vibrating with rage as America gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.
"You're cute when you're angry," the young nation smirked.
"You won't think it's so bloody cute later tonight lad," England shot at him, which wiped the smile off of America's face immediately and his eyes to light up with anticipation. The two nations had been having quite a good time this week with their new experimentation and Texas fogged up as America's breathing intensified.
"I just hope he's calmed down by tomorrow morning," Spain said, pulling the conversation back around to why they were all drinking in the first place.
"Kesesese," Prussia laughed into his beer. "Don't worry about Westen. I guarantee that by tomorrow my awesome bruder will be his less-awesome-than-me-but-still-awesome self again." He winked at the collective table.
"What did you do, Prusse?" France raised a defined eyebrow at his friend.
Prussia chuckled again as the nations leaned in toward him with curiosity behind their eyes, "Well let's just say that while you were all pestering Westen, everyone but little Italy managed to forget someone with much more experience in the whole field. Namely—the Awesome Me!" He winked at Canada once again, which went unnoticed by most everyone except France who narrowed his eyes at the former nation for a moment.
Grinning, Prussia leaned back in his chair and took another sip of beer. "Feli had lots of questions and the Awesome Me was ever so happy to help. Anything for meine bruder's happiness. And right now—Westen is walking into the surprise of his life!"
AN:
Joseph Haydn: An Austrian composer during the Classical period who was close friends with Mozart and spent much of his career as a 'court musician.' He said that when he retired from that position that he had to "become original again"
Britain: I like to think that America usually calls England a variety of irritating (to England) nicknames like Iggy or Artie or even just his full human name of Arthur and that he only uses Britain when he's being serious. That's just my own personal headcannon.
*Spain being a 'nation pleasing nation' is also my little thing. I just feel like he's so friendly and nice all the time. Cleaning Romano's room and putting up with his outbursts. I think that he has retired from his 'Armada and Inquisition' days and is just a generally nice (super cute) guy who wants them all to be friends. I mean, even his 'April Fool's Joke' was so that they could all just take a funny picture as buddies.
Mon ami: My friend
Prusse: Prussia
