AN: Hey everybody, this chapter has been heavily added to and edited! Thank you for reading and please review!
Once Winry got to her room she curled up dizzily on her bed and tried to think of anything besides what an awful person she was for being unfaithful to William. He had been nothing but good to her. Beyond good actually, he had brought sunshine back into her life. Bleeding to death on her doorstep, he had come from nowhere seemingly to fill the void of her loneliness. When he had arrived, she had seen the blond hair and blood everywhere and instantly thought of Edward all those years ago. She couldn't help but want to take care of him and want to be around him, he couldn't fill the hole where Ed should be, but he made it feel a bit smaller. He wasn't mouthy, pigheaded, or always putting himself in danger, which she both liked and disliked about him.
From the time William had healed, he had attempted to get Winry to open up to him about who she was always staring off into space over. When she finally did tell him about the wonderful brothers, at first he just listened and gave her space whenever she would insist that Ed would be back to marry her anytime. When a year had passed since she had spoken to him and two since she had seen the golden man, Will began trying to court her. Months went by with Winry politely telling him 'no' until one night she realized after a close call that she could spend her whole life waiting for her life to begin. She had given it a lot of thought but after that she hesitantly agreed to see William the next evening for a date. Just the fact that he had stuck around so long, waiting for her to give him a chance had worn down the resistance she had held against the idea. He was sweet, considerate and reliable, things which she wasn't used to. These were fine qualities, but sometimes she wished he were teasing or temperamental, the things that made her heart flutter. Unlike Edward, he was quite the charmer and didn't really get flustered by flirtation, it was nice to have met someone that was so comfortable with his feelings, but if she was honest with herself she had always liked how the elder Elric would blush and bumble around her. Putting William off of kissing had been easy until recently, she had spent months sending him to the door with little more than hugs and the occasional peck on the cheek. Two weeks ago though, she had given in and they shared their first kiss- her first ever. She wanted to say it was a great kiss, and if someone would have asked her about it then she would have thought so, but after being kissed by Edward, she knew that was a lie.
With just one heated kiss, Ed had awakened the very thing she was petrified to feel. Lust. Hell she knew it well years ago, after watching him spar shirtless with Alphonse and coming in the house with sweat beading off his well muscled chest, it took everything not to pounce on him then. But after so long of being alone, she had forgotten the rush that accompanied that attraction. Not to say she wasn't attracted to William, but it wasn't the magnetic pull she felt whenever she looked into the golden eyes of her childhood love. The moment that Ed had walked in that first day, she had tried her best to suppress her less than pure thoughts. She had believed they would be easier to handle now that she had moved on, but seeing the fire inside of him just drew her as much as it always did. But, and this is what everything really came down to, did she want to go through being left behind again? William was the type of man who would stay by her side for the rest of her life, he would never make her wait and always treat her like a gentleman should. Then again, and this was the thing that worried her the most, how was she supposed to go through life without the passion and love that Ed made her feel without doing anything other than just being himself?
Just then someone knocked on the door, and she was sure it was Ed, and for another minute she had actually hoped that it was, but to her surprise Granny came in holding the nearly empty bottle of Scotch. Unfortunately this brought on a bout of nerve induced hiccups.
"Winry Rockbell would you like to explain to me what has been going on this morning? I found the pipsqueak out by the tree curled up around this." She shook what was left in the glass bottle, so there was no confusion as to what she meant. "Now I understand how sudden and horrible losing Alphonse was, but this is not going to make dealing with the pain any easier. Alcohol is a temporary distraction." With a look of disapproval, Pinako stared at her with knowing eyes.
"Well Granny when I woke up Ed was burning stew and drinking alone, and I remembered you telling me that you never let a friend drink alone, so I figured I would-" She stopped to hiccup loudly. "be his friend and support him right now." A silver eyebrow raised seeming to ask a question of it's own, 'What kind of support did you give him after you drank this alcohol?' Blushing furiously, Winry averted her gaze quickly. "Uh huh, I'm going to say this once…Don't drink my stash of Scotch. It won't fix your problems and you don't want your dear old Granny getting angry do you? That being said I think you are both old enough to make you own choices even if they are bad ones. You won't be making this a habit correct?" Shaking her head vigorously, and then regretting it immediately after at the feeling of imbalance hit her, she most assuredly would not be doing this again ANYTIME soon.
"No thank you I feel all lopsided and I made a dumb choice in the midst of the moment." Her cheeks flushed hot again after realizing that she had said that to Granny.
"What choice would that be?" Puffing on her pipe, Pinako shot Winry a look that said she knew exactly what the answer was anyways, but that she still wanted to hear her to admit it out loud.
"Well…" Trailing off, she mortified at what she was about to say, afraid that her Granny would be disappointed in her for doing that to both of the men. "Ed kissed me and I let him longer than I should have." She had to look like a cherry between the embarrassment and the hiccups she had finally got to stop.
"I wondered about that given the other items I found him asleep holding." The old woman put her index finger and thumb on either side of her chin thoughtfully.
"What items?" Her heart did a little flip flop.
"Your bandana and what looked like a ring box, it wasn't just that he had those things, but how dearly the little twerp was holding them. Then again now that he has even lost Alphonse, we are all he has. I can't imagine how hard life has been for him losing everyone he's ever loved." Ed's final words to her last night rang through her head. 'Don't act like you care about me, I lost the last person who loved me tonight!' Flinching, she hated that he had felt that way even for a minute. After a minute she thought about what else Granny had said. Winry remembered taking off the bandana while drinking and laughing earlier. The kitchen had gotten so humid between the heat off the stove for the stew and the burn from the Scotch. And lastly, the ring box. That would have to be something she thought about more when she was able to soberly process everything that that meant. She began to talk but Granny continued, "I know how badly Ed has hurt you by disappearing with no contact for that long and I'm not saying you should let him off the hook by any means, but I would be sure of your feelings for him and William before you make a decision that will alter how your life plays out. I know you are happy with William and he is a fine man, one of the few I consider worthy of my granddaughter, but if your feelings are unresolved for Ed, which given that you kissed him back I would say that the whole situation bears some reflection to be had. My thought is that sometimes the safe choice isn't the one that will make you happy in the long run. Don't be afraid to have your heart broken; be afraid of never having real enduring love." That might have been the most sentimental thing her Grandmother had ever said, and even with her liquor soaked mind, she understood how rare it was for her to speak her opinion when it came to Winry's choices.
"I just don't know what I want right now and with losing Al, I feel like nothing makes sense anymore. I wish I could go back three years and just keep us all together and safe." Tears began to prick her eyes at the thought that she would never see her best friend again. How was she supposed to make any decision without his level headed outlook? He was always her voice of reason.
"I'd like that too, however life has other plans so just be thankful for the time you've had with Al and do your best to live the happiest life you can, I know Al would like that." Granny turned to leave the room.
"Hey thanks for everything Granny." She smiled half heartedly up at the sage woman.
"No problem, but don't think for one minute that you and Ed won't be replacing my Scotch." She cackled as she closed the door. Once again Winry was left alone with her unclear thoughts.
AN: Hope everyone liked Granny's advice, please review!
