A/N:Thanks go first to my beta who is brilliant! Secondly thanks to all my reviewers. Hopefully I get more reviews this time.
Lyrics in bold.
She seemed dressed in all of me,
Stretched across my shame.
All the torments and the pain,
Leak through and covered me.
Remy watched Rogue as she slept. Her breathing had slowed and she had stopped thrashing in her sleep. But unfortunately she had definitely absorbed him. He knew from the way she muttered in French and had on more than one occasion charged the sheets. He had to act quickly and pull the charge back into him those few times she lost control. He was wracked with guilt that she not only had that monster in her head but now she also had the memories of his dark past.
He sighed and slipped on the gloves he'd 'borrowed' from the locker rooms of the hotel staff. Carefully he moved her arm out and examined the gash. The cut was deep and there was a faint purple bruising around her arm. He carefully touched her arm and she hissed. He sighed and tucked her arm back under the blankets. He stroked her forehead until the frown that had formed there went away. For a moment he was happy as she smiled in her sleep.
All the things that must be running through her mind. Her past, his past, and the sick thoughts of that madman in her head. And yet she fought so hard against the torment. She really was a diamond. He thanked his luck for taking a turn and bringing this magnificent creature into his life. And he felt sick with the thought that he was destroying everything pure about her.
I'd do anything to have her to myself,
Just to have her for myself.
Now I don't know what to do,
I don't know what to do
When she makes me sad.
Now that he thought about it the truth became crystal clear. He loved her. Loved her like he never thought he'd love again. He loved her more then he'd loved that temptress Bella Donna, more than his need for the wild things in life. And he wanted her like a starving man needed food. She was his oxygen and his kryptonite at the same time. He didn't want her body, as beautiful as it was, he wanted her soul; he wanted to be in the presence of her fire and passion every second of every day. He wanted her to be his because he already belonged to her.
Carefully he kissed his finger tips and then placed them on her lips. A sealed promise. He would save her like she saved him. She stirred and her eyes fluttered open. He was happy to see her emerald orbs looking back at him. But his heart broke at the sad smile that graced her face.
'Remy?' she whispered.
'Hey, Chere.'
'It hurts.'
Her hand flew to her temple. He moved her hand and placed his own there, rubbing gently.
'I know.'
She looked at him and for a moment he feared he'd given the wrong reply. But then he knew it was something worse when she looked away and bit her lip.
'Why'd ya do it?'
He closed his eyes and his heart clenched. Why did he have to be so careless? Now she knew all his past deeds, none which he was proud of. He couldn't look her in the face as he replied.
'I don' know.'
He heard a sniff and he opened his eyes. She was crying. His Chere was crying and by the way she took his hand and comforted him, he knew it was for him. His guilt grew as he watched someone who was in so much pain comfort him.
She is everything to me, the unrequited dream,
The song that no one sings, the unattainable.
She fell asleep soon after and he watched her. She truly was beautiful. His mind seemed to repeat that fact. He never worried about her skin. It was her mutation, it was who she was. He should have told her that he could be creative and find ways around her skin. That her skin was not an inconvenience but a gift that he found exquisite. If she was his, she could only be his. But now the opportunity was gone and she was nothing but a dream.
She's a myth that I have to believe in,
All I need to make it real is one more reason.
I don't know what to do, I don't know what to do
When she makes me sad.
'Chere, dis Professor, where is he?'
'Bayville.'
'Let's get y' dere.'
'No Remy. Ah can't go back.'
'Y' need 'elp.'
Rogue sighed and sat up. He couldn't help but pull her into a hug and stroke her hair.
'Please Chere. For moi.'
'Okay,' she whispered.
He nodded and packed their things. Then he handed her jeans and t-shirt. He turned to give her a few moments of privacy to change. Soon he felt a warm hand on his shoulder. He turned and placed a kiss on her glove hand. She smiled shyly. They left the room, walking hand in hand. He paid their bill and then went to the car they'd stolen. He helped her in, before climbing into the driver's seat. He turned to her and winced as her eyes flashed red on black.
'Stay wit' me Marie. Y' gonna be better soon.'
But I won't let this build up inside of me,
I won't let this build up inside of me,
I won't let this build up inside of me,
I won't let this build up inside of me.
They drove for a few hours. Rogue would often twitch or mutter something. The guilt was starting to increase, making him grip the wheel with enough pressure to turn his knuckles white. He sighed and tried to calm himself. When his guilt wasn't eating at him, his anger consumed him. How could that bastard torture her? It was sick the way her mind was being tormented by some maniac.
He finally pulled up to the old mansion gate. There were children running outside, their laughter echoing all over the grounds
'Chere?'
'Yeah, this is it.'
'Should we ring a bell or—'
'It's okay. The professor's a telepath. He knows.'
He was about to ask what the professor knew but then the gates opened. He pulled in and parked the car. He got out and moved to her side. She tried to stand but he lifted her bridal style. She was too weak to fight and simply curled closer to him. He entered and found an old bald man in a wheelchair. The man looked at Rogue with a worried expression.
'You brought her just in time.'
A catch in my throat, Choke,
Torn into pieces,
I won't, no,
I don't want to be this,
The professor didn't ask questions, just had Remy carry Rogue to his office. Remy held Rogue tighter, aware of all the eyes watching him. He always thought she was a loner like him. But he realised she had a family. She just didn't admit to one. As he entered an office the professor gestured for him to place Rogue on the couch. He carefully set her down and stepped back. The professor hovered over her head.
He waited, watching her carefully. People came in and out to see if the rumours they heard were true. He heard the whispers, they all spoke of the Rogue being back. He felt a certain anger toward them. Children were so foolish, always so quick and harsh to spread rumours without thinking about the consequences. He sat in a chair near Rogue and rubbed his temples. Who was he to talk? This was his fault.
'Professor?'
'Not now, Scott.'
Remy turned to the door, his anger increasing. This was the man Rogue had referred to, the one who scarred her heart and mind. He had brown hair and wore ruby quartz glasses. Scott turned to Remy and frowned.
'Who are you?'
''m a friend of Rogue's.'
'Did you do this to her?'
'No.'
'Then what happened?'
'I don' t'ink dat's any of y' business.'
'Listen, you slime ball, if you hurt the woman I love—'
'Love?! Don' make me laugh. Rogue told me all about y'. If it wasn't f'r y', she wouldn' 'ave sold 'er soul f'r touch and den had it snatched from 'er years later, leavin' 'er broken and empty,'
Remy's heart clenched as he spat out the last words. That's what she was, broken. Gone was the spitfire that he had met. The truth in his own words tore right through him. Judging by Scott's expression, it cut him too. Remy sighed and turned back to Rogue and the professor. The professor looked up and nodded.
'She needs time. I've locked all her psyches away. Now she needs to rest.'
'I'll stay wit' 'er.'
The professor nodded and wheeled out.
'Scott, leave them. Go make the necessary preparations.'
Scott nodded and headed out, the professor following him. Remy drew his chair closer to Rogue and placed a hand on her cheek.
But I won't let this build up inside of me,
I won't let this build up inside of me,
I won't let this build up inside of me,
I won't let this build up inside of me.
'Hey.'
Remy turned and found himself in the presence of a short, hairy man. He nodded curtly at the older mutant.
'What happened to her?'
'What's it t' y'?'
'She's like a daughter to me. And if you had anything to do with this—'
'So y' Logan.'
'Huh?'
'Logan. Her fat'er figure. Marie talked about y' a lot.'
'Hmph. Guess if you know her name, you two must be close.'
'Yeah.'
'So, what happened?'
'Y' still wanna know?'
'Just 'cause she trusts you doesn't mean I do, bub.'
'I didn' turn 'er int' some mutant hunters. Dey didn' take it too well.'
'Well, she's alive. So I guess I don't have a reason to rip you to shreds.'
'I wish y' would.'
'Don't let the guilt eat ya kid.'
'Dere's only one t'ing left f'r me t' d'. I don' know if she'll understand.'
'It's not whether she'll understand, rather if it's what's best for her.'
'I know.'
Logan stroked her arm and then left. Remy moved a piece of hair on her forehead and then used it to shield his lips from her skin as he kissed her.
She isn't real,
I can't make her real.
She isn't real,
I can't make her real.
From his pocket he drew the Queen of Hearts that she had dropped along the past few days. On the top of the card he had carefully written: Je t'aime mon Chere. He placed it in her hand.
Then he sighed and whispered in her ear, 'Désolé. Je ne peux pas garder ma promesse. Je suis un monstre, mon ange, et cela est pourquoi je dois la feuille vous. Mais vous toujours aurez mon coeur.'
With those last words, he walked away. Had he looked back he would have seen the tears fall from her eyes. But he didn't look back. He walked away.
-xXx-
A/N:That last part roughly translated is: Sorry, I can't keep my promise. I'm a monster, my angel, and that is why I have to leave you. But you will always have my heart.
