Crack The Shutters
Chapter 4.
'Matsumoto!'
After returning from sightseeing near the hotel, Tōshirō returned to his room and discovered a very unpleasant surprise. On the bed, lying on her stomach, his Lieutenant was currently reading one of the free magazines offered by the hotel, sweet wrappers scattered across the quilt cover. He couldn't believe it. After leaving for only twenty minutes he had returned to an absolute mess. How on earth did this woman manage to live alone?
Used to his irritated tone, Rangiku didn't even notice his appearance. Growling to himself, Tōshirō made his way to the bed and began to pick up the sweet wrappers from the bed and floor. It was when he took the box of sweets did Rangiku suddenly plummet back down to earth. Mouth full of chocolate she made a very offended whine, shooting a glare at him.
'This wouldn't be happening if you kept the place tidy! And why my room? You have yours.'
Swallowing her treats, she scowled, 'That's because I don't want to make my room messy!'
He honestly had nothing to say about that. Muttering obscenities to himself, the Captain picked up the rest of the rubbish, and chucked it all into a nearby bin. Tōshirō didn't know for sure how old Rangiku was, but the majority of the time she acted like an eighteen-year-old. One would be amazed to discover he was actually a good fifty years younger than she. Ah, the joys of being a Shinigami.
'Now, there's a very nice building close by that we should check out,' Tōshirō said, even though Matsumoto was barely listening, eyes focused on her magazine. 'It's a place where people of a specific faith come to pray. The architecture is really nice.' Over the years, Hitsugaya had come to appreciate buildings and their structures. 'Matsumoto.'
'Mm?' She raised her head. 'I'm sorry, what?'
It took everything in him to not scream. Shaking with fury he said, 'There is a building I want us to see.'
Unlike her Captain, Matsumoto was not one for architecture. She honestly didn't understand why people could stand around and gawp at a piece of brick. 'I have to come too?'
'Yes.' Tōshirō snatched the magazine from her grip.
'Oi!'
'Shush. You've been lazing around, and I don't want to be lying on the bed. I want us to go outside and explore.'
Turning her head slowly to the window, Matsumoto watched the snowstorm outside batter against the glass. Was her Captain insane? Heaving a heavy sigh, she slumped her shoulders and reluctantly left the bed to grab her coat. 'It's freezing out there, and you might prefer staying inside. At least until the storm settles down. Although you're not prone to the chill, Captain, that doesn't mean I'm not either.'
'Stop complaining. You sound like a four-year-old sometimes.'
Then she smiled, bringing her arms around his neck. 'But I don't act like one,' she said, brushing her lips against his. Tōshirō's knees wobbled, and his eyes automatically closed by the amount of pleasure such a simple touch gave him. No, this wasn't right.
'Matsumoto,' he said, gently taking her arms and placing them at her sides. 'Look, what happened earlier: that was a silly mistake on my part. It didn't mean anything.'
It was true that Tōshirō could be awfully blunt. At first, she felt a little shocked he would say such a thing, then she realised he had hurt her. It didn't mean anything–– how dare he? Rangiku wanted to scold him for acting so rude, but she remembered why they were here: for his birthday. It would be selfish of her to criticise his behaviour on his special day.
'Oh.' Still, his words were harsh. He might as well have slapped her. 'Whatever you say, Captain.'
Tōshirō didn't like how her words lacked the usual emotion. She almost sounded like a robot. Grabbing her coat and pulling it over her shoulders, he tried to study her face, maybe find out what was wrong. Had he said something wrong? Frowning, he followed after her out of his room, and together they left the hotel. Hitsugaya's eyebrows rose when Matsumoto didn't wait for him and walked on ahead. He had to run to catch up with her.
In silence, he escorted her towards the building, but all the while he was worried he had upset her. Worried. The prince of ice was worried. Snow whipped in their faces, and while he found this quite pleasant, he doubted his Lieutenant was having the time of her life. Lifting her hood to block the sharp flakes, Tōshirō was now unable to see her face and figure out if he had upset her.
Matsumoto wasn't sure what angered her the most: the fact Hitsugaya had dragged her outside into this shit, freezing weather or he had rejected her. No one rejected her, and no one said her kiss was nothing. Not even those men she barely knew. They rejoiced over her kissing them. Tōshirō, however, had been rude and just so cold about it. To her, their moment had been everything. Her heart pounded heavily whenever she thought about their kiss, or whenever she thought about him and his soft gaze. Matsumoto didn't fall for a lot of people, but when she did, she fell hard, and she feared Tōshirō was becoming one of these men.
Unlike the others, though, this man might not actually feel mutual. Everything was so strict and professional. So boring and restricting. She was so angry she didn't realise how fast she was walking, nor was she aware Tōshirō was trying to catch up. That man had hurt her. Smply and easily, he managed to almost tear her heart in two again. Men. She was so sick of them! How many more times did someone she love have to grab her heart and rip it out? Maybe she was overreacting a little bit, but he had been so blunt and forward. It didn't mean anything.
How could he be so cruel?
The building did not interest her in the slightest, but, for him, she pretended to examine the brick. To be honest, she could see some attraction to the building: it was shaped like a temple, almost, sloping upwards, pointing towards the sky. There was clearly a lot of religious significance to this building. When Tōshirō approached a sign describing the temple, she watched him from afar, and wasn't sure whether to hate or love him.
He was so broken, but strong too. Rangiku knew him better than anyone, and was aware he had never involved himself in a relationship with another, due to lack of interest. The Captain seemed to only have eyes for those he previously possessed a strong bond with, but he was a naturally detached man, and, now, there were very few he even had a proper conversation with. He was somewhat anti-social, but ridiculously independent and fierce in nature. People tended to avoid him because they always received the impression he wasn't interested.
Which was probably true. Since he had become older, grown to look like an adult, Tōshirō's behaviour had changed. If not, worsened. The man was constantly training, constantly had ice hugging his form. It was no surprise the ice had shaped his heart and mind. Being distant was safer, kept him at ease. It was, in many ways, a wise choice of lifestyle. But a lonely one.
So why did she feel so... close to him? Even when they weren't in the same room together, both could feel the other's spiritual essence. Even miles and miles apart, countries apart, they could sense each other, and his essence was always powerful. It had been a very long time since Matsumoto felt warm. It was as if he constantly had his arms wrapped around her, wherever she went.
Turning away from him, she averted her gaze towards the hills ahead. They were covered in snow, one could barely see the outline of them.
While she examined the scenery, Tōrishō soon finished reading about the building. There was nothing particularly spectacular about it, but it was certainly nice to look at. Inhaling, he came over to speak to Rangiku. 'Thanks for coming with me. I know the weather is bad. It's a great building, though. You should look at it.'
The nagging irked her more than it should have. Oh, how silly! He was her Captain, she was under his command. Never had his orders annoyed her. She always honoured them and obeyed –– for the most part. Had she been too forward with their kiss? She hoped she hadn't made things awkward between them. I shouldn't have kissed him, dammit. 'It is nice, Captain.'
Looking down at her, Tōshirō wondered if she was telling the truth. 'I gather you want to head back.'
'I'd like that, thanks.'
'Okay––' The words barely escaped his lips. Rangiku was already on her way. Something was certainly wrong. Shoving a hand into his pocket, Tōshirō followed a couple of steps behind. There was no point in trying to catch up with her. Maybe Matsumoto needed time alone. He didn't think she was angry. Or, if she was, then not at him. He hadn't done anything wrong, had he?
Relieved to be in the shelter of their hotel, Rangiku released a happy sigh and lowered her hood. Her cheeks were burning from the freeze, and she felt disgusting. The Lieutenant hated it whenever her appearance was more flawed than she would like it to be. Urgh, I need a shower. Maybe that'll refresh my head. It was when she reached the staircase did she decide to wait for her Captain. This was silly behaviour, she decided, but Rangiku was an open woman, she was expressive, and she was honest.
Tōshirō, friend, lover, colleague, boss –– whatever he was –– had offended her, and he needed to know. Screw it being his birthday. No one got away with being so rude to her.
'What did you mean when you said "it didn't matter"?' She asked as soon as he reached her at the stairs.
Tōshirō halted and gave her a look. 'What are you talking about?'
'I think you know what I'm talking about, Captain.'
Wait, was she referring to their conversation before leaving the hotel? Hitsugaya blinked, swallowed. 'Matsumoto, we should probably discuss this elsewhere.'
At first she was about to retort, then decided that seemed like a wise idea. She didn't want a crowd watching their petty discussion. Hurrying up the staircase, she approached his room, which was closest, and waited for him to unlock the door. Once they were inside, Hitsugaya closed the door behind him and chucked the keys onto the bed.
Rangiku remained standing and looked over to him, waiting for an explanation.
'I didn't mean anything by what I said,' Tōshirō exhaled. Running a hand through his hair he went over to the kettle and put it on. 'I just don't want things to become complicated. I've known you since I barely reached your hips. The last thing I want to do is cause complications.' That was all. That was his reasoning.
'I don't want to either, but you implied that our kiss meant nothing. Did it honestly mean nothing to you?'
'No.'
'Then why did you say that?'
Tōshirō inhaled sharply between his teeth. 'Matsumoto––'
'Because I'm going to be honest with you: I'd never felt so happy. I liked having your arms around me. I know this sounds really dumb, but what happened between us did matter to me. To have you turn around and reject me like that hurt my feelings.'
Tōshirō shook his head and stepped closer to her. 'You have the complete wrong end of the stick, Matsumoto. When I said "it didn't matter", I meant––' And what did he mean? How much he wished he would think before he spoke. '––I made it clear that being with you makes me happier. That was why I didn't want to go back to Soul Society. As soon as we head back there, you'll just be my colleague again.'
'I don't have to be,' she said quietly.
Tōshirō softened his expression slightly. 'You know we can't happen, unless you were transferred to another Division, and I'd––' Hate that. '––I'd have to think about that first. I think we overstepped our boundaries. For the sake of our careers as Shinigami, and for our reputation, also, I'd suggest we don't acknowledge what happened between us.'
The way he said this was not right at all, but he was too late to correct himself. Rangiku gave in trying to cover her emotions. If Tōshirō didn't want her, then she respected his wishes, but to not acknowledge what happened? 'I can't do that, and I know you can't either.'
She was right: Tōshirō's mind kept repeating their moment together, kept playing over his words. I'm not going anywhere without you. However, he had to think realistically. 'I–– Matsumoto, why does this matter to you? We'll still see each other every day at work; I'll still talk to you.'
'You can be such an idiot.'
'Excuse me?'
Now he saw it: the pain in her eyes, the distress and agony. He was ruining her all over again. 'Of course it matters to me. There's no one else I'd rather be with than you. I've never felt this way towards anyone in my life, and that's saying something–– I've had a pretty long life, Captain. What happened meant something to me because I could tell you, or... show you how I felt.'
Currently, a thousand bolts of lightning were shooting through Tōshirō's body, and all he could do was stare at her. Who would love him? He was a demon of ice, untouchable. Most of the time he was scolding her, and yet she felt something for him? He meant that much? Dropping his gaze, he wanted to slap himself. Who was he trying to fool? Matsumoto was dear to him, she had been for years. This wonderful lady was practically offering herself to him, and he was running away.
How could he be so weak? How could he be so–– hesitant and sensitive? 'I'm sick of you being treated like crap, Matsumoto. I'm sick of it.' Then he faced the kettle and began to pour himself a mug of tea. However, he was so bothered about everything, he accidentally spilled some across the table. Slamming the kettle down, the anger started to spike. 'I want you. I have for years. You've done so much for me, but I–– I can't do it. I'm not emotionally available as you'd probably prefer me to be. I get angry, but that's about it.'
If he spoke anymore words, her heart would burst. Obviously Hitsugaya was struggling. He hated being so personal; he hated trying to figure out his feelings. The man would rather ignore them and distract himself with something else. Matsumoto was practically shoving these emotions into his face and demanding he try and sort of them out.
'I'm sorry, Captain.'
This surprised him. Frowning, he turned to her.
'I shouldn't be discussing this when it's your birthday.'
Sipping at his tea, he wanted to laugh. 'My birthday? My birthday would have been awful if you spent the day upset because of me. I'm glad you approached me about this. I just don't know what to say to make you feel better. All I can hope for is that you'll understand where I'm coming from.'
She nodded, averting her gaze. 'Of course I understand.'
And she was probably the only person on earth who would. Tōshirō was holding his cup of tea so tightly, he didn't realise his palm was burning until the pain suddenly hit. Hissing, he placed the mug down and shook his hands. 'Ah, that stings.'
'What did you do?' Rangiku hurried over.
'Burnt them on the mug. I hate heat. Such a pain.'
'It's not that bad. You were silly for holding the mug like that anyway.' Carefully claiming a wrist, she guided him towards the en suite and ran a tap of cold water. 'Place them under there.' Tōshirō obeyed, and inhaled sharply when the cold stung his palms. Gradually, his hands began to feel numb, but he knew the healing process was working. While he did this, Matsumoto left the bathroom to collect something.
She soon returned, a jar of cream in hand.
'Never go anywhere without this,' she said. Grabbing a towel, she told Hitsugaya to place his wet hands out for her to dry. Gently, she ran the towel around his hands before grabbing the cream and placing them in the centre of his palms. 'Rub them together. You'll be okay soon,' she teased, pulling at his cheek.
Tōshirō rolled his eyes, but smiled. 'I like it when we're like this,' he said, rubbing his hands together. 'So, you wanted to take me to a pub, right? When we go, I don't want you drinking pint after pint.'
'Aww, Captain, you offend me. I know I have to take great care of you. Why would I ever ruin that responsibility?'
When he met her gaze, it felt as if everything around them stopped. Tōshirō was hit with a fierce impact, a possessiveness, and he wanted more than anything to kiss her, remove her clothes and make love to her. His entire being growled, and his heart was screaming at him. However, his mind was the devil, grinning and telling him "no", she deserved better, you deserved better. Neither of you would work together. She was different, and he was different. Tōshirō wondered if it was right of him to ignore these feelings. They were so demanding; he had never felt this way before.
Clearing his throat, he checked his pocket watch. It was nearing seven in the evening. 'We might as well head there now, don't you think?'
Rangiku nodded once. 'Yes. If we're lucky, we might actually get the best seat. The bartender is really nice, as well. All you have to do to get a free beer is smile, and he's practically swooning.'
'Uh-Huh. Something tells me I won't have the same affect.'
'Fine, I'll smile for both of us, grumpy.' Taking his wounded hand, her enthusiasm got the better of her, and she pulled him out of the apartment. Tōshirō had to stretch to grab his keys and they were off, heading out of the hotel and outside. Unfortunately, the weather hadn't changed, but the tension between them had thankfully dropped.
Internally, though, he knew their conversation hadn't finished. Tōshirō wasn't sure when Rangiku would bring it up again–– if at all. The pub wasn't far away. It seemed to have been dumped in the corner of the town they were residing at. Already a couple of men were outside, laughing and drinking. Tōshirō felt a sudden pang of protective urgency over his Lieutenant, but he realised Rangiku was pretty used to men. It would be insulting for her if he came to her aid like that.
When they entered, the bartender instantly recognised the female Shinigami. 'Ah, hello, Rangiku! You've brought a friend,' and that made the bartender's smile drop. 'Your friend is male.'
'That's right,' Tōshirō said sternly, eyeing him, while removing his coat.
'And he's the birthday boy, so you must be nice!' Rangiku said, squeezing her Captain, much to Hitsugaya's displeasure.
'Birthday boy?' The bartender laughed. 'Aren't you lucky to be spending the day with her?'
Tōshirō decided he didn't like this fellow. Oblivious to the heated rivalry, Rangiku sat down next to her Captain, 'He's very new to alcohol. In fact, I think he has a bit of a fragile stomach, so we should go easy on him with the liquor.'
'Matsumoto,' Tōshirō groaned, ears burning.
'No problem,' the bartender smirked. 'I'll go easy on you, sweet cheeks.'
Rangiku laughed at the silly name-calling. Histugaya wanted to hit a wall. 'Ooh, be kind to him.' Rangiku pushed Tōshirō playfully. 'Oh, you know you should try cider first. That was the first alcohol I tried. Not great, but it's a great start for people like you,' she said, running a hand through his white hair. Hitsugaya scowled. This was humiliating, and he knew Rangiku was enjoying this.
'Here ya are,' the bartender said, passing Tōshirō his drink. 'And what about you, Rangiku?'
'Give me a bottle of the Spitfire.'
'Anything else?'
'Not yet.'
Tōshirō clenched his teeth when she smiled sweetly at the man. The bartender passed over Rangiku's drink, and then turned his attention to the next customer. As soon as the man was distracted, Tōshirō turned to scold his Lieutenant. However, she stopped him speaking.
'What are you doing just sitting there? Open the bottle, silly.' Grabbing his bottle of apple cider, she removed the top and poured him a pint. 'You'll love this, trust me. Gentle alcohol, for a gentle soul.' Then she grinned, expecting him to grow red in the face.
'I swear when we get back to the hotel you'll be amazed by how loud I can raise my voice.'
'I'm only joking, Sir. Take a sip now.'
Huffing, he snatched his glass and took a swig. 'Eurgh!'
Rangiku was laughing again. 'You look as if I'd given you dirt to eat or something.'
'Certainly tastes like dirt...' His mouth slowly fell open while he watched Rangiku down half a pint in one go. Eyes wide, he tried to think of something to say, but nothing came to mind. What was she? And why did he find her casualness with liquor so damn attractive? Gulping, he picked up his glass of cider and tried another sip, but only shook by the taste. No, he really didn't like it.
'Maybe you should try mine.'
'Maybe I shouldn't.'
'C'mon, Captain. You really don't think I know what I'm doing?'
Their gaze met. 'Like Hell I do.'
Shoving the glass to him impatiently she said, 'Just try a bit!'
'Fine.' He took the alcohol, and gulped down more than he would have liked. 'Ooh!' Tōshirō clenched his teeth and violently shook all over in his seat.
'Ahaha, I can't take it! You're so sweet.'
Sweet wasn't what he wanted to be. 'Go away, Matsumoto.'
'It's nothing to feel bad about. Obviously the Spitfire and Cider isn't for you. Uh, bartender––' She tapped her glass against the bar, which, somehow, called the tender over.
'Need me to chuck him out yet?' He asked, referring to a very grumpy Hitsugaya.
'No, no. I need you to help me find a drink he might like. What's your favourite?'
'I like many,' the bartender said, giving Tōshirō a look. Oh, if only he knew what I could do to that smug face of his, thought Hitsugaya while the man searched in his fridge. 'We have orange juice? Aha, I'm kidding, smoky hair.'
'That's it...' Tōshirō was on his feet, but Rangiku quickly placed a hand on his shoulder.
'You two should stop getting at each other's throats,' she said, rolling her eyes at him. Then she smiled slowly. 'Smoky hair. I get it now.'
It was by far the worst insult Tōshirō had received over his features.
'How about coke and vodka?' Rangiku suggested.
'Sounds good,' the bartender said.
'Coke and... vodka?' Tōshirō queried. He could only imagine how awful that tasted. When the drink was handed to him, he took a hesitant sip, squirmed slightly, then made a face of slight approval. 'Not bad.'
'Success,' the bartender said.
Rangiku smiled at her Captain. 'I was worried we'd have to buy the whole bar until we found something you might like.'
Sipping on his drink, Tōshirō couldn't help but feel relieved too. As long as that bloody bartender wasn't judging him, then there was a higher chance that Hitsuagaya wouldn't decorate the entire pub in ice.
By the time Rangiku was on her fifth drink, Tōshirō was only half way through his first. It was amazing how many people Matsumoto actually knew in the pub, and he wondered if most of these customers were frequent visitors. The man didn't involve himself much in conversation. He preferred to listen to the conversations Rangiku involved herself in, continuously impressed how sociable she was. That was one of the things he liked about her: she just seemed to allure people over, have discussions with them about nothing so easily.
Tōshirō wasn't good at that in the slightest.
By the time most customers had dispersed it was nearing ten o' clock. Hitsugaya was shocked at how fast time had flown.
'Are you enjoying yourself?'
Looking over at Rangiku, he had to nod. 'Surprisingly.'
'Good,' she eyed his drink, and her expression turned amused. 'You tried, Sir.'
'Ah yeah,' he picked up his half-empty glass. 'It was good while it lasted.' A pause, then he leaned closer. 'Thank you. For today. It's been the best birthday I've had. I never really celebrated it before. My Granny did her best, but we were so busy trying to survive and so poor. There wasn't much she could offer me.' Whoa, where was all of this coming from? The alcohol? Possibly, but he didn't have much.
'You don't need to thank me, Captain. It's been a pleasure, even if I did ruin it slightly.'
'You didn't,' he shook his head. 'I suppose we just have to look past our differences. We have for a long time, so I don't see why we have to stop now.'
Matsumoto was confused at what he was implying. As far as she was concerned, their conversation before had finished on a neutral note. She might not have been happy with his decision, but it was what he wanted, and she couldn't object. Still, she nodded and gave him a smile. 'I suppose we do. Captain, look... He's not tending the bar.'
At first, Tōshirō thought she was going to let that pass, but, to his horror, he watched his Lieutenant grab her empty glass, lean over the bar, and pour a drink herself. His first instinct was to stop her, but then he found himself laughing. Matsumoto soon returned to her seat just before the bartender arrived and sipped happily at her drink.
'How many times have you done that?' the Captain whispered.
'His fault for not minding the place,' Matsumoto said.
'That's theft,' he said, even though he couldn't stop grinning. 'God, you're unbelievable. If you get arrested, don't even think for a second I'm bailing you out.'
'You'll have to, Captain. After all, what're you going to do without your Lieutenant, mm?'
'A lot. I could hire someone who actually does the job.'
'Pfft, but they'll be boring and grumpy. Like you!'
'Yeah they–– Hey, I'm not boring!'
She sniggered. 'At least you accepted you're grumpy.'
Tōshirō's expression was blunt at first, but then he allowed a little smile. A sigh escaped Rangiku's lips and she came so close to him she almost toppled off her seat.
'I'm happy I gave you a great day, Sir,' she whispered.
It was then he realised she was a little drunk. 'I think it's time for bed.'
'Hehe, I think it's time for a little more booze,' she replied, grabbing her bottle of–– whatever the heck it was. Before she could pour herself some more, Tōshirō stopped her, snatching the bottle from her grip and slamming it down. 'Si–ir, we don't wanna waste money.'
'Waste money my backside. You just stole alcohol.'
'Shh, not so loud. I don't want Mister Stinks-Of-Cigarettes stomping over here.'
'Stinks of cigarettes? Seriously? Come on. I want to go back to our hotel. This place is getting awfully stuffy and hot.' Standing to his feet, he pulled on his coat and motioned for Rangiku to hurry up and follow him out of the door. With slight difficulty, she managed to find her balance, slip on her coat and walk behind him. As soon as they left, Matsumoto wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him tight. At first he thought she was messing around, but something told him this embrace was sincere.
Rangiku rested her cheek against his back and closed her eyes. 'I wish I could do everything with you.'
The alcohol was obviously having an effect, but Matsumoto was still stable. If anything, the liquor had enhanced her feelings. Tōshirō claimed her hands and turned around to face her properly. In the moonlight, Matsumoto looked lovely, looked younger, but tired. The same exhaustion had reappeared from when they kissed this afternoon. To think, if he hadn't invited her to celebrate his birthday, none of this would have happened. Should that have been the case?
When he ran a hand down her face, it sent a tickle of electricity through her. Tōshirō's eyelids closed half way, and they remained watching each other for a moment, as if waiting for the other to do or say something. After their conversation, he doubted Rangiku would kiss him. He had made it clear he wished for that to never happen again.
'We should head back,' he whispered.
Together, and in silence, they returned back to their hotel. It was very late, and the streets were deserted. The stars, however, crowded the dark skies. Tōshirō was too distracted to study their beauty, though. His mind was spinning, and it wasn't because of the alcohol. Everything inside him was pumping, hot and bothered. Just touching her sent him over the edge, and he almost felt ashamed for falling into this pathetic trap. He was ice, he was supposed to be ice.
And yet the ice was melting by her fire, terribly fast, it nearly frightened him. Her presence had that much of an effect.
They reached his room, and he invited her inside. The day hadn't ended, and he still wanted to celebrate the last few minutes with her. Instead of alcohol, he chose the milk which the hotel had kindly left for him in the tiny fridge. Pouring them both a glass, they kicked off their shoes and coats before resting on the bed, leaning against the wall. Tōshirō welcomed Rangiku to snuggle up against him slightly. He inhaled her sweet scent, and caught himself smiling.
'Your watermelon is still in the office.'
'Oh,' Tōshirō frowned. 'No one had better steal it.'
'I'll buy you another if someone does. I'll even engrave another love heart into it.'
Tōshirō rolled his eyes. 'Better not. I'm going to eat it anyway.' He sipped at his milk and placed the glass on the bedside table. 'What do you want to do for your birthday?'
'I'm not fussed, Captain.'
'... sure you're not.'
'Well, now you asked, I really want to go to a spa,' she said, raising her head to look at him. 'You know they have massages there, they do your nails, and the pool is glorious. Oh! There's also these exercises they let you do, like yoga and pilates They also have rooms where it's completely silent and you can just fall asleep in them, but I doubt you'll like that. You'll enjoy the swimming pools and the steam room. Oh, no you won't because you hate the heat. You will be walking around in your swimming trunks and gown, though, and they also provide you with slippers––'
'Do you ever stop talking?'
Rangiku stopped, then released a breathy chuckle. 'Sorry. But would you honestly do something for my birthday?'
Tōshirō nodded. 'Yes, actually. You deserve that much at least.'
Maybe she was touched by his words, he wasn't sure, because she went quiet for a moment. To redeem her silent state, she quickly said, 'It's your birthday we're focussing on, Captain.'
'We've focussed on me the whole day, and I'm tired about doing what I want. What do you want?'
'That's not how birthdays work.'
'It's my birthday, so I decide what happens, and I'm asking you what you would like before it ends?'
You. Hitsugaya couldn't read minds –– although that would be a fantastic ability to possess. Yet his Lieutenant was very expressive, and they could communicate freakishly well without saying any words. And in those few seconds every logical reason he had against them being together vanished. His body was already responding and he hadn't even touched her yet.
Hands at either side of her face, Tōshirō roughly kissed her lips, his mouth possessive and greedy, tongue running over her lips and meeting her own. A light moan came from Rangiku while she moved, pushing her mouth harder against his own, wanting him closer. His lips were slightly chapped from the cold weather, and his hands were freezing, but she wanted his hands all over her, she wanted him to touch her everywhere he could, and she didn't care if it would freeze her.
She straddled his hips, her own hands finding his chest, running her palms down his hard abs, before finding the buttons to his shirt. Breath heavy, it took every ounce in her to not rip apart the fabric. The buttons came undone while she continued to kiss him, and then finally the shirt was removed. Their lips came apart for a second, and he inhaled sharply, letting her feel his soft, cold flesh under her palms, running them down past his chest, and then up his back. Tōshirō's eyes remained closed, loving her touch, wanting more of it. He could barely focus when he caught her lips again.
Tōshirō had played safe and disciplined himself, but the way her hands glided over him was too much to bear. He needed her. Their kisses had turned wet and hot, lips bruised and sore, but neither wanted to stop, it was so good, but not enough. A hand hesitantly fell from her face, passed her collarbone, and he had to leave her lips for a second to kiss her neck. Rangiku sighed happily, pressing a hand at the back of his head while he left a trail of kisses from her jawline to her collarbone.
'C–– Captain, please..' She wasn't sure what she was asking for, there was something else she wanted. Her body screamed for his touch.
Hitsugaya looked at her, mouth slightly ajar, breathless. Then his hands began to remove her shirt, desperate to discover what was hidden beneath. Rangiku helped him undress her, and when it fell to the floor effortlessly, he straightened his back, kissing her lips again, softer, but equally as forceful. There was no time for gentleness; he couldn't do gentle anymore. When a hand found her breast, she inhaled sharply, as if unprepared for his forwardness, but she allowed him to continue.
Yet the Captain's interests were not on her chest, surprisingly. He wrapped his arms around her waist and switched positions, finding it easier to have this gorgeous woman beneath him. Their lips met, and he was absolutely lost, rocking against her, aware of her legs resting at his hips for a moment. Rangiku shivered, aware of the dramatic decrease in temperature, but she clung to him, kissing him fiercely, both arms around his neck.
It soon became clear he was fond of her legs, and she half-absently wondered if he always had been. A hand zoomed up her calf, to her thigh, pulling up her skirt slightly. Her flesh was soft, wonderful. Rangiku released his lips, dropping her gaze to the belt of his jeans, and she began to unbuckle the accessory before carelessly throwing it aside. Tōshirō allowed her to unzip his trousers and he shuffled out of them, throbbing lips against hers again. They found it unbearable to be inches apart.
She could feel his arousal, and was desperate for it to be dealt with, but Tōshirō was infuriatingly gradual. He was taking his time. Any other man she had slept with was more than eager to get things under way, but it was as if Hitsugaya wanted to know every part of her. He wanted to know her. To him, this wasn't sex. This was much more than that. Rangiku deserved more than that.
Barely able to breathe, she tried to kiss his lips again, but her Captain seemed to have stopped. Heart fluttering wildly, she wasn't sure how to react at first. 'W–– What's wrong?'
Tōshirō didn't look himself. The coldness in his eyes had almost melted away, and she wasn't able to read him. Softening her expression, she ran her hands down his face, aware he was unused to physical affection, let alone what they were doing.
'We shouldn't do this,' he said.
Was he joking? Rangiku swallowed, trying to compose herself. 'Why?'
'I do want this; I want this so much, but not tonight. You don't have to give me yourself when we've only been this way for less than a day.'
'I don't understand.' And she really didn't. It was clear she had consented, that she was just as enthusiastic –– if not more so –– than he was to make love. 'Have I done something?'
'No,' he shook his head. 'I just want to convince you that I am different. I wouldn't want to have sex with you and that'd be all. I–– I'd feel more comfortable if we worked on our relationship first before jumping into this, Matsumoto. Do you understand?'
This was a matter which was very personal to Tōshirō. He was already hesitant when it came to touching people. The man could barely stand a pat on the shoulder. All of this was so fast and sudden. Not only was he sympathetic towards Rangiku's feelings, but he also had to deal with issues of his own. Tōshirō wanted her, but he didn't feel right for her just yet.
Admittedly, Rangiku was very frustrated to be informed of this now, especially when he had done what he did. 'Yes, I do understand. I just hope I didn't do something wrong, I can get a bit––'
'You were perfect,' Tōshirō said. More than perfect, wow. 'You're just going to have to excuse me.'
Preferably, she would have liked him to have told her this before she let him remove his shirt. However, Tōshirō had his awkward moments. Sighing heavily, she decided to let the matter go. Whatever made him happy made her happy. It would be awful if he consented to do something without truly wanting to. Plus, it was very sweet of him to think so highly of such an activity.
Next time, though, she would make sure he was prepared because no way was he stopping something like this again.
'As long as I don't have to sleep in my room.'
'I don't intend for you to do that.'
Tōshirō allowed a little smile and leaned forwards to kiss just above her lip.
'Let me grab my jeans.'
It was a shame he decided to cover up his legs, but he still allowed her the gorgeous view of his well-toned chest. A shade of red covered her cheeks when she realised how much she was staring. Once his trousers were on, Tōshirō spread the quilt and together they snuggled beneath. Tōshirō stretched over to switch off the light, and the two were left in complete darkness.
For a few minutes, they were silent. Tōshirō's eyes remained open, his hand gently gliding through her hair. Despite his chilly presence, Rangiku's warm body seemed to be battling against him, and she was winning. Hitsugaya sighed and ran a hand past her shoulder to land on her waist. In the little light offered by the moon, he saw her eyes were closed, but he doubted she was asleep just yet.
'You're all that matters to me. You always have been.'
Rangiku shuffled closer to him, resting a hand to his chest, hearing his heart. 'Happy birthday.'
A soft smile reached his lips and he lay there, calm and settled. Soon, he could hear Rangiku's slower, heavier breaths, a sign that she had fallen into slumber. He wasn't all that surprised. They had done a lot today, and he, too, was exhausted.
Soon, her gentle breaths began to soothe him, and his eyelids slowly closed, before he allowed sleep to take over.
Good night, Ran.
author's note: Sorry that Tōshirō is how he is, but I didn't want them to have sex. It just seemed too quick, and I'd rather they developed this new relationship of theirs. Poor Ran, though. I did sympathise with her frustration. Anyway, next chapter shall be the last, and I got to say, this story was loads of fun to write. I hope you have enjoyed it as well. Reviews are greatly appreciated! I was concerned Ran seemed OOC in this when she approached Tōshirō about her feelings, but you readers can be the judge of that.
Thank you avanunanx and sagitgirlth for reviewing the prior chapter. Until next time!
