Chapter 4
A car horn blared at us and it was then that I realized Tweek and I were kissing in the middle of the parking lot. I pulled away quickly and walked him to my car.
"Sorry it's a mess," But really I was sorry that I had kissed him for only a short period of time. Sorry that I hadn't spoken with him in years. I was sorry his lips were so welcoming that I wanted to kiss them again.
He didn't respond.
I drove in silence, now familiar with the roads. And somehow ended up at some little restaurant that I had been to just the other day. I walked in and saw the same hostess, in all her youthful glory. Her face lit up when she saw me again, but lit up even more when she saw Tweek.
And Tweek had the same reaction, "I see you got the job, Karen."
Suddenly I felt foreign.
"Oh yeah," Karen blushed, "Kenny knew the manager and got me a decent spot so I don't have to worry about next year."
"I'm looking forward to working with you. Maybe you can intern for me," Tweek looked so comfortable talking to the McCormick.
I looked at Karen, brown hair pulled back into a ponytail. What a wide smile she had on that beautiful face. It made me jealous. "I didn't recognize you the other day, Karen."
"I didn't either," She smiled and it reminded me of how I missed being an idiot teen with Kenny, "How are you, Craig?"
She took us to a booth seated away from everyone else. "Dad's sick, haven't been home in years, and I just kissed this guy and he hasn't had the courtesy to look me in the eye yet."
"Always honest, I see," She waved us off to help another couple that had just entered leaving us alone in the silence that began in the car.
"So, you still like spaghetti?" I looked up from the menu to see Tweek looking back at me. I set the menu down and leaned in closer, "Look, I'm sorry."
"What's the most expensive wine they have here?" He responded.
"So I see you want to get drunk with me. How 'bout later on we pick up a bottle of your pick and we can relive old times." I sounded like a sarcastic asshole. But I was being so serious. I wouldn't mind if we did do that. All those times we snuck liquor and stayed up all night getting drunk only to fall asleep in each other's arms after hours of deep conversations. I missed that.
The waitress came up to take our order before he responded. Tweek, probably feeling rude already, ordered one of the cheaper items. He was just trying to sound like he didn't care. It was quiet until our food arrived.
"I wouldn't mind." Tweek mumbled above his bowl of pasta.
"What?"
"Let's pick up some cheap vodka. Forget about real life for a night," He continued eating.
I dropped my fork, "Are you serious?"
"When have I said something I don't mean?" Tweek finally looked me in the eyes.
We continued eating and it felt like forever and a year. I couldn't down the food fast enough to spend time with Tweek pretending we were seventeen and everything was okay. Even if it was just for a night and everything would be shit in the morning I wouldn't care.
Once we were done we hit up the liquor store and got the same vodka we'd get when we were teens. This time there were no fake ID's or asking older siblings of other friends to buy for us. I dropped him off at his car and we met at his place.
Tweek lived in a new apartment complex. He let me in and it was oddly clean. Books were on the floor, mostly medical, and some trash was on the floor. But overall the place was clean. It was a nice place, especially for someone like Tweek. I followed him into the kitchen where I saw that his coffee addiction hadn't stopped. Coffees of all different type were aligned on the counter. I'm not even sure he had actual food in the house from the looks of his fridge. He just pulled out a variety of juices to mix our garbage with.
"So," I watch him make mixed drinks, "how long have you lived here?"
He handed me my drink, "Once I got the job at Hell's Pass, so two years ago." He chugged most of his so I did the same.
"Why haven't you been home in years?" He asked.
"You want me to be completely honest?"
He nodded.
I grabbed the bottle of our cheap liquor and took a swig of it. I had to clear my mind a bit. "I was scared shitless." Tweek took the bottle from my hand to pour himself another glass.
"Of what?"
"I thought it was my turn to ask a question," I smirked, taking a seat on his kitchen floor.
He sat down right in front of me, "Ask away, Craigster." He placed the bottle in between us.
And I did ask. I found out so much about him, about what happened in these years apart. He graduated early, and worked for his parents until graduation. After a year of trying to contact me he gave up and focused on school. He was thinking about going back to school to become a doctor. He wanted to be a surgeon, maybe, he was still deciding.
I was the same in the work aspect. I was a pilot, still a baby compared to the rest, traveling the country. I told him how I wanted to go back to school for veterinary work. And he smiled at that. Probably the childish way I expressed it. Wanting to be a veterinary was something little kids wanted. Just like being a doctor, so maybe he understood. Maybe that's what he smiled at. I was too drunk to tell.
Funny, how we were almost thirty and still deciding what we wanted from life.
And finally our questions and drunken laughter led to the quiet that was now. An odd silence overtook the both of us as we had no more reason to talk.
That is until Tweek opened his mouth, "Why did you kiss me?" His eyes looked directly into mine and I was taken aback. How did we get to this point in time where we had to relearn every aspect of our lives? Why was it now that we were brought together? What were the odds?
What were the odds?
"Because," I leaned in closer, as did he, "I wanted to feel home again."
He smiled, that Tweek smile, practiced and serene. "Because home is where the heart is?" He almost whispered.
And I was taken back to when were seventeen. This is what I wanted, yes. But to actually be here felt surreal.
We kissed.
"I missed you, Craig," He said when we pulled apart.
I placed my hand on his cheek, so beautiful. And I kissed him again, my phone interrupting.
I answered, and it was my mom. Not a good sign at all. Her voice was shaky, and her words were broken between cries. "How's dad?" I asked, feeling as if I sobered up instantly.
"He's dead."
Everything went silent and all I heard was that same annoying beep of Dad's heart moniter.
'Beep, beep, beep.'
Voices, too. Voices of Tweek and my mom. My sister had grabbed ahold of my mom's phone and was almost yelling through it. Why was she yelling?
'Beep, beep, beep.'
I was still so drunk, I found out as I tried to stand. I had dropped my phone and Tweek had picked it up almost immediately. I walked out of the apartment against Tweek's commands. They were foggy and distant. That beeping noise was in the way. I ran down to my car only to have my keys taken away.
"Kenny's getting us," Tweek said, handing me my phone in place of the keys. He helped me out of the car and walked me to the sidewalk.
Tweek trying to keep me standing failed to do so. I fell into the grass. Lying on my back I stared at the night sky. There used to be so many more stars in the sky here. 'Beep, beep, beep.' I was supposed to be seventeen tonight. But he was dead. He. He. Dad. Dead. Dead. Stars. Sky. 'Beep, beep, beep.'
He's dead.
He's dead.
Dead.
'Beep, beep, beep.'
Tears poured out of my eyes uncontrollably. Drunken, sad, nostalgic filled tears. I couldn't stop them even if I tried. So I laid in the grass and cried. I balled. As if I was the only person left on earth to hear.
"Let it all out, Craig," Tweek had somehow sat down next to me. He moved my head to his lap, running his hand across my forehead.
"I can't see the stars," Was the last thing I remember crying about before I passed out.
For real this time this should have 1 more chapter. I'm determined to finish this. I might wait till after finals to finish though.
Yay. Reconciliation for real this time. But noooo death. Craig is having a rough time. Poor Craigy. Next time should just be Craig dealing with stuff and closure. Plus decisions concerning futures.
Thanks for reading! XOXO
