Figure it out yourself.
Ryuuji was doing something useful. Physical activity that didn't require him to think very much was just what he needed. He wasn't up to packing the boxes but he could make endless trips picking up a recently packed box and moving it to the back of the delivery truck that Yasuko had borrowed from a friend. At least, that was what he had thought at the beginning. He was exhausted to the point of collapse after moving only six boxes. He sat in a heap in the shade of the hallway looking into a mirror and wondering why he was so weak. The boxes hadn't been particularly heavy, so why… His reflection gave him the answer to the question. His own face was almost unrecognizable and his arms and legs… For the first time since grade school his arms and legs looked thin and weak. How had it come to this?
"Taiga," his reflection seemed to suggest. He wanted to argue that verdict – defend the accused… but he could not. He looked away from the mirror and the recriminations, and his body of evidence. He wanted to look back and see if it had been an illusion, but he knew it was not. He had allowed his body to waste away and the honesty of the reflective glass on the wall would not allow him any denials.
"I've really let myself go." he admitted to himself as he finally looked back and took stock of his health situation. The self-evaluation was not good. He looked skeletal.
"It is an opportunity." he heard Ami's voice and looked up to see her watching him and holding a taped up box.
"Eh?" he didn't know she was still at the house and was surprised both by her observation, and her presence.
"You're going to be making healthy food for me so think about what you should be eating too." she explained her answer, "How do you want to rebuild yourself? Do you want to be stocky and strong like a boxer, lean and fast like a cyclist, or something else?"
"Right now I just want to be strong enough to load these boxes." Ryuuji moaned as he got up off the floor, "but yeah… I see your point." He reached to take the box from Ami but she kept it.
"There is another one back there on the floor," she said as she stepped past him towards the door, "I've got this one." Ami took the box out the door and down the steps but walked past the truck to where the trash bins were kept. Ami wanted to throw this box away. And because she wanted to do it, she knew she could. It didn't have to be the right thing to do, or a good thing to do, or even fair thing. She, Kawashima Ami, could throw this box away simply because she wanted to. This box should not survive…
"Ami-chan?" Yasuko's voice asked quietly from behind Ami, "what are you doing?"
"What am I doing?" Ami's head dipped as she stood there still holding the not-yet-discarded box in her arms. What was stopping her? Why hadn't she thrown away this stupid box already?
"What's in that box?" Yasuko asked with a bit of concern.
"Love letters, songs, poems..." Ami answered sadly.
"To Taiga?" Yasuko sounded puzzled.
"No," Ami answered, "well there may be something in here about Taiga, but it is mostly for Kushieda Minori."
"Minori-chan?" Yasuko's surprise in her voice made Ami smile a bit. Apparently, Ryuuji had been so good at hiding his crush for the pink headed jock that even his mother didn't know.
"Yeah," Ami explained, "Ryuuji had a crush on her since middle school but never got the nerve up to ask her out. That's how he got involved with Taiga… she was supposed to help him into a relationship with Minori-chan but… you see how that turned out."
"I see," Yasuko thought about all this, "you're worried that he might start getting better then get depressed all over again if he starts looking through this box."
"Yeah," Ami hadn't really thought much about that possibility. She just wanted to get rid of the box because it was all about Minori. It was also, to some extent, about Taiga. But there was nothing in that box that was about her. Nothing in there for Ami. "Something like that."
"Give me the box." Yasuko's words weren't harsh but they were firm. It broke Ami out of her melancholy and she looked up to see Yasuko's sad eyes. She was caught and she knew it. Without a word, she handed the box over to Yasuko and turned to walk away. She had only taken two steps back toward the house when she heard the loud thud of a box being dropped into the trash bin.
"What?" she said as she spun to see Yasuko also walking back from the trash bin empty handed. Ami's jaw dropped as she realized what Yasuko had done. "Why?"
"You are right," Yasuko took Ami's hand as she walked back toward the house. "After he is fully recovered he might have enjoyed looking through those memories. But until then… until he is fully recovered… we can't afford to let him go to pieces if he finds that box." Yasuko stopped walking and faced Ami, "He wouldn't survive that." Looking down with a ghost of the horror of the last several weeks haunting her eyes, she added, "I wouldn't survive that."
"But… he'll be mad!" Ami knew he would very well be furious.
"I'm sure he will." Yasuko bit her lip, "but I am his mother and he will have to forgive me… sooner or later." Looking up at Ami, she smiled and told the teenager, "I told you I would do anything for you. You are going to save my son. I believe that. But it will all fall apart if he gets mad at you."
This was the difference between them. As much as Ami had justified her actions, she knew she was doing something wrong. She was doing something despicable and she told herself she didn't care. She told herself the same thing she always told herself in situations like this. She was Kawashima Ami, and she didn't have to play fair. It had always worked before… hadn't it? Her reasons and justifications were all completely selfish. To satisfy her own petty jealousy, Ami wanted to throw the box away, but Yasuko would do the same thing out of love for her son. Not only were her own reasons altruistic, but she didn't see the selfish spirit in Ami. She was truly a good person, and chose to see the good in other people… even when it wasn't there.
"Onee-chan..." Ami realized she had called Yasuko by the sister nickname without thinking this time and was as stunned with herself as she was with Yasuko.
"It'll be all right if he is mad at me for a while, as long as he is okay. I can live with that." Yasuko gave Ami's hand a squeeze, then let go and headed into the house with a smile on her face and an eagerness to get to the next box.
"Onee-chan." Ami whispered as she watched the blond bombshell bounce up the stairs. Looking back at the trash bin, Ami realized that Taiga hadn't just fallen in love with Ryuuji. She had fallen for the family. If the grandparents were even half as wonderful as Yasuko, they should truly be the poster family for all of Japan.
.
"Takasu-kun, how is your arm?" Ami asked Ryuuji as they all sat in the western style chairs in Ami's living room and enjoyed the air conditioning.
"It's fine." Ryuuji lied. His arm was killing him and he knew it was going to hurt just as much tomorrow.
"Huh?" Yasuko asked, "What's wrong with Ryu-chan's arm?"
Ryuuji almost said something about it but he shut down when he remembered the moment. He remembered all the things Kitamura had said to him. His heart was already a mess with the huge gaping hole that was left by Taiga's departure and subsequent silence. That which remained of his battered heart was further fractured when Kitamura pointed out all the people he was hurting. Even his own mother had suffered because of him. That in turn, made him think about how he was so absorbed in his own sorrow that he didn't notice what he was doing to everyone else around him. The pieces of his broken heart were beginning to crumble and fall apart. He couldn't tell his mother about the fight with his best friend now. Not after she was starting to feel better herself. He looked away from Yasuko and could say nothing.
"There was..." Ami answered after it became apparent that Ryuuji wasn't going to answer her, "an accident up at the school and Ryuuji hurt his left arm." Ami downplayed it for Yasuko's sake, "I'm sure it's nothing really. But after moving all those boxes I thought it might have aggravated something."
"Ryu-chan," Yasuko's eyes were open wide in concern, "are you okay?"
"Really, I'm fine." he tried to sound convincing, "There are just a few more boxes..."
"Oh no you don't," Ami stopped him, "Onee-chan and I can take care of the remaining boxes. You have work to do in the kitchen! After moving all this stuff, I'm hungry!"
"Fine." Ryuuji caved in, "What can I use?"
"The kitchen is yours," Ami said as she selected a box and picked it up, "I may not have a lot of good ingredients though… just do what you can with what I have on hand and we can shop for better stuff tomorrow."
Ryuuji turned toward the kitchen with very low expectations. He knew that Ami had been living off convenience store food and restaurants for a while so she was probably right about her own inventory of ingredients.
"Make sure you use something from the green cabinet!" Ami hollered to him as he stepped into the kitchen.
"Yes." he answered as he looked at the much more modern kitchen in Ami's house. A double oven, a range, an overhead hanging rack for the pots and pans, and there was the green cabinet. Odd, it wasn't very large? Opening it, he wondered what kind of special ingredients would be in this smallish cabinet. His mouth contorted into a twisted smile when he saw that it was a first-aid and medicine cabinet. And there, on the bottom shelf, were bottles of three different kinds of pain killers. He thought he had hid the pain pretty well but it looked like Ami could see right through him.
Acknowledging defeat, he selected the right pain killer for his particular pain, read the directions, and took the maximum recommended dose.
.
Lying in her bed that night, Ami was exhausted. They had successfully moved all the boxes and she had helped Yasuko to unpack most of them so there would be little to do during the week. Dinner had gone well too. She was surprised with what Ryuuji had been able to throw together. Apparently, her Aunt had left the kitchen better stocked that she had thought. Having been busy with helping Yasuko unpack, Ami hadn't had many chances to look in on Ryuuji while he was preparing the dinner. The few times she saw him, he looked pleased with his new kitchen.
Dinner went well… well as good as can be expected. Ryuuji still didn't put any food on his own plate, but he didn't resist when Ami prompted him to eat from her chopsticks.
After dinner, she and Yasuko took care of the dishes while Ryuuji took care of getting himself cleaned up. Ami noticed that Yasuko was humming while she was putting the dishes away. She smiled as she thought of how much Yasuko had changed from just this morning. Ami had to admit that she was impressed with Yasuko. Her new Onee-chan had the build of a model, a happy youthful persona, and the love of a mother all rolled up into one person. Thinking of the emotionally reserved nature of her own family, she was envious of Takasu-kun's mom. For a while Ami wondered what it might have been like growing up with a mom like Yasuko. She had a hard time imagining Yasuko as her mom, but as a big sister…
"Hey!" Yasuko's cheery voice came from right next to Ami's ear as the blonde's arms wrapped around Ami from behind, "Ryu-chan is done with the bathroom and gone to bed now. Are you ready to take another bath with your Onee-chan?"
"Hmmmm," Ami reached up to hold Yasuko's hands where they rested on her shoulders, "My Onee-chan… I like the sound of that." A smile spread across Ami's face as she basked in the warmth of Yasuko's hug. "Will you wash my hair again… like you did last time?"
"Of course!" Yasuko answered gleefully.
"A bath with Onee-chan sounds nice." Ami purred.
.
"Minori-chan," Ami called out to the red headed jock as she came off the softball practice field, "a moment?"
"Amin! Amin!" Minori cheered as she headed toward her tall statuesque friend with the long blue hair, "Sure, I've got a moment for Amin!" Minori didn't so much walk or run as she bounced over to her friend waiting by the water fountain.
Ami watched Minori with disdain. She could see that the bright cheerful act that Minori always played was wearing thin. Back when her health could back up that act, it was only annoying but now… There were bags under Minori's eyes either from lack of sleep or from crying. Although her smile and laugh looked real, they didn't work with eyes that looked tired and haunted. Eyes that used to be full of energy and mischief were still open wide but had the look of someone fearful of getting the next delivery of bad news. The act was beyond annoying now. Ami hated it. Minori could not be honest with her own feelings and she wore that dishonesty like a mask. This was not the time to get into it with Minori though. There would be time for that later. Now she needed to make the muscle-head understand something of a far more urgent nature. Ami waited with her own smile intact as Minori stopped to get a drink from the fountain.
"I will be eating lunch with Takasu-kun in the classroom today." Ami said simply. Her smile registered only a little surprise as she watched Minori splutter and choke on the water she was drinking.
"What?" Minori looked at her with astonishment, "What makes you think he will..."
"It is already arranged," Ami said the words without smugness or pride, but she could see how Minori would probably take offense to what she had to say next, "I discussed it with him when he made my lunch for me this morning."
"This morning?" Minori's expression was becoming thunderous, "Why were you with Takasu Ryuuji this morning?"
"I was with him last night too," Ami could see Minori's hands balling into fists, "as well as his mother."
"What?" Minori was still enraged but that last comment seemed to break the spell of her indignation just a bit.
"Minori-chan," Ami smiled at her incensed friend, "I am telling you this only because I believe you still care about Takasu-kun. The story that everyone will hear is that Takasu-kun and Onee… his mother, have moved in with me. They are doing this to help me get in shape to restart my modeling career. This is the story that I want you to make sure everyone believes."
"But the truth..."Minori was still outraged. She looked as if she might beat Ami's face to match the color of her hair.
"The truth is," Ami knew Minori had to hear the truth now or she really would lose it, "Takasu Yasuko lost her job because she was so devastated with what Takasu-kun was going through. She is broke. They were being evicted. Her only other option was to leave town, go back to her parents, and have Takasu-kun hospitalized for depression."
"What?" like a bolt of lightning, Minori's rage seemed to flash for an instant and was gone. Her hands were unclenched and a hollow look was in her eyes as she regarded Ami, "I… I didn't know."
"Listen Minori-chan, this is important." Ami looked the stunned pink-haired jock in the eyes, "I need you to make sure that Takasu-kun and I eat alone… at least for now."
"What?" Minori looked hurt more than angry now. Then, with a bit of suspicion, she asked, "What are you up to?"
"I am trying to save him." Ami said simply, "Yesterday I got him to join a conversation with Yasuko and me."
"Really?" all suspicion seemed to be gone with the news that Ryuuji had gone as far as talk to someone.
"Yes." Ami closed her eyes and took a deep breath before continuing, "For now though, I think it would be best if you and Yusaku ate somewhere else."
"What? Why?" Minori was returning fast to somewhere between furious and indignant.
"Think about it." Ami helped her along, "If you were in the room he would wonder why you weren't eating with us. And if you were eating with us, who would be the only person missing?"
Taiga.
Dammit Taiga.
Taiga you idiot.
"I understand." Minori looked down with the gloomy realization that Ami was right. But there was more to it than that. Even if Ami wasn't right, she was the only one to make any progress with Takasu-kun, so far. Minori was willing to do anything to help Ryuuji get better. She had already tried everything she could think of and could only watch with horror as his depression spiraled deeper and deeper. If the best thing she could do to help Ryuuji was to stay away from him, she would do that. Turning to go she said, "I'll make sure Kitamura-kun understands too. I'll stay away from him."
"Whoa there muscle-head," Ami stopped Minori with a hand on her shoulder, "this is a very difficult time for Takasu-kun, so we can have no misunderstandings. I never asked you to stay away from him… except for lunch."
"Really?" Minori turned back to Ami and smiled, "we can still be friends and everything?"
"Of course," Ami dropped her hand from Minori's shoulder and gave her best everything-is-going-to-be-okay smile.
"Yes!" Minori looked like she was about to give Ami a hug but just as suddenly, took a step back and bowed, "Thank you very much for taking care of Takasu-kun, Amin!"
"Oh… um… you're welcome." The formal thanks caught Ami off guard, but she recovered quickly. After all, this was Minori; she always was a dinner plate short of a place setting anyways.
.
Minori was back to looking her usual excited self in the classroom. She was constantly watching Ryuuji to see signs of this recovery that Ami had told her about. At first, she noticed nothing and was starting to worry that Ami had exaggerated his improvement. Just as he had been for the past several weeks, he sat slumped in his chair and seemed uninterested in the world around him. But then, she started to notice the small things.
He was taking notes and actually seemed to be listening to the lecture.
His book was open to the right page and it looked like he was reading it instead of staring blankly at the page.
By the time lunch came around, Minori was quite excited. She glanced back at Kitamura and saw that he had noticed and was pleasantly surprised too. Unfortunately, the Student Council President had come in late and she hadn't had the opportunity to give him Ami-chan's instructions. Minori watched Kitamura pick up his lunch and start toward Takasu-kun. Minori looked back at Ami. Ami saw Kitamura coming as well and looked back at Minori with an arched eyebrow.
"Kitamura-kun!" Minori called out to him when he was half way to Takasu-kun's desk.
"Kushieda?" Kitamura stopped and addressed Minori.
"Meeting." she said as she picked up her own lunch, "Bring your lunch."
"Meeting?" Kitamura looked back at Takasu for a moment and noticed Ami pulling her chair over to his desk before he turned to follow the pink haired softball captain out the door. Several minutes later, he found himself following Kushieda into an empty classroom in the building wing on the other side of the courtyard from their own classroom. Minori went to the desks next to the windows and looked back at their own room without saying a word. Kitamura followed her gaze and watched the scene with amazement.
At first, things seemed fairly normal. Ami was sitting across from Ryuuji. She took a bite of her lunch while Ryuuji seemed to just sit motionless. Then the amazing part happened. Ami got a bite of food in her chopsticks and moved it to Ryuuji's mouth. From across the courtyard and with the windows closed, of course the two observers couldn't hear anything, but it looked like Ami just told Ryuuji to open his mouth… and he did. Eyes opened wide and mouths hung open as they saw Ami feeding Ryuuji from her own chopsticks.
"What…" Kitamura had trouble believing what he was seeing, "what is going on here?"
Minori looked around the room to make sure they were still alone. Then she told him everything. She told him what Ami had said and what she asked of them. She told him about her own concerns and suspicions. But in the end, the proof was right there in front of them. Kawashima Ami had made more progress with Takasu-kun than anyone else.
While Minori was talking, Kitamura was looking at the scene across the courtyard from him. He noticed more than just the two figures having lunch. He looked at everyone else in the classroom as well and could see that he and Minori weren't the only ones registering looks of shock and disbelief at the spectacle. He waited patiently for Minori to finish before he commented.
"Oh Ami," he said with a hint of sadness, "I do hope you know what you're doing."
"Eh?" Minori was confused. To her, the proof that Ami knew what she was doing was answered when she saw that Ryuuji was eating again.
"Look around the room at everyone else." he explained to Minori, "see how surprised they all are?"
"Um, sure." Minori wasn't any less confused.
"Ami and Takasu are eating from the same chopsticks..." Kitamura observed.
"Ah!" Minori gasped, "Indirect kiss!"
"... and she is feeding him his lunch..." Kitamura continued.
"Like lovers do!" Minori finished the sentence.
"It would appear that Ami has claimed him for herself." Kitamura concluded, then turned to ask the shocked Minori, "Do you really have no way to get in contact with Aisaka?"
"No," then angrily she shouted, "don't you think I would have by now if I could have?"
"I do, but I had to ask. If anyone would be able to reach her… it would be you." Turning back to watch the scene unfolding in the classroom across the courtyard, Kitamura asked Minori, "Have you figured out what is really going on over there?"
"Eh?" Minori thought she had, but she also knew that Kitamura could see things on levels that she never did.
"By now Aisaka has probably already lost Takasu." Kitamura explained, "but if there had been even a sliver of hope that she could come back into Takasu's life… it's gone now."
"What?" Minori was aghast, "How can you say that?"
"Look at them," he encouraged her, "and think about what you are seeing."
Minori watched for a while. Ryuuji no longer seemed forced in his acceptance of the food she was offering him. Ami was smiling and chatting as they ate their lunches. Ryuuji's stoic demeanor slowly fell and eventually he even seemed to be giving responses to some of the things Ami was saying. Ami was looking out the windows, or at things within the classroom, or at Ryuuji. But Ryuuji was looking only at her. It wasn't the blank look that he had been giving the world either. He was looking at her the way he used to look at Taiga. And, Minori admitted, the way he used to look at her before Taiga.
"Oh Taiga," tears welled up in Minori's eyes, "she's lost everything, hasn't she?"
"Maybe not everything." Kitamura consoled her, "She went away to find herself, right?"
"Yeah?" Minori said hopefully.
"Well, the price will have been high, but if she can do that… it's something."
"The price?" Minori looked at Kitamura.
"She will have lost Takasu, and all of her friends… except you I suppose."
"What?" Minori gasped, "You're still her friend, aren't you?"
"Not now." Kitamura admitted, "It will be a while before I can forgive her thoughtlessness and what she has done to Takasu." He sighed and continued, "In a little over a month I will be heading to America to study abroad. I will probably never see Aisaka again, but I promise you that I will always remember the fond times from last year."
"No..." Minori moaned in desperation as she realized just how much Taiga would lose. The vicious little sprite didn't know it yet, but the love of her life was slipping away and soon Kitamura would be gone as well. She felt Kitamura's hand patting her back as the tears began to fall.
Dammit Taiga.
Taiga you idiot.
