Warning: This chapter may contain emotional backlash
After dinner, I couldn't help but smile. The stupid grin didn't go away after everyone left to go to sleep either. I couldn't even get rid of it while I lay in bed trying to close my eyes. I was the happiest I'd ever been and I kept spilling into my face.
Alyx peered over the edge of her bed to look down at me. "That smile of yours is staring to really creep me out." She said but her face had a grin that probably rivaled mine. "I know we've only known each other for a few days but I expected you to just shrug and be cool about it. Why are you so happy?"
I shrugged but my grin grew wider. "I don't know."
I had a clue though. It might have been because I hadn't had human contact in such a long time and it might have even been because no one was ever that nice to me before. It might have also been because of the relief that, after seeing earth after so long, there was still so much good going on.
I decided on telling Alyx the one that would make more sense. "I guess it's because I've never been included in anything before."
Alyx raised a brow in disbelief. "Really? You weren't popular before?" She asked.
"I swear." I replied with a laugh but it faded quickly. My childhood, which I'd been successfully blocking out for who knows how many years came crashing back to me. "I was always a weird kid. I hated stuff toys and dolls so much that they would end up in the trash cans around the house. If it was some lame plastic action figure, they didn't last that long either." Alyx shifted to a more comfortable position.
"Mechanical parts, though, that was a different story. My parents noticed how I would try to take them apart and bought me my first tool belt at the age of 3. I loved to learn about them and since my mom and dad loved talking about them, it wasn't much of an issue. Later I learned I wasn't there real kid but I loved them so much. They taught me everything I knew."
"With the other kids, I guess that made it hard for them to understand me. The adults were the same case. No one wants to listen to a kid. It was just my parents who really cared."
"They took me to their work a lot and sometimes, I would even help them with their projects. I even got to enter in this competition once. I won too. They were so proud." I hadn't even noticed my voice starting to quiver. I bit my lip and took in a shaky breath.
"What happened to them?" Alyx asked with a soft voice.
"They died just a little after the competition." I took a breath to steady myself. "That was about the time I went . . . into hiding."
Alyx looked at me with empathetic eyes. "I lost my mom to the Combine when I was young too but I don't know what would have happened if my dad had been lost then too." I ignored her obvious assumptions and tried to stop my tears. Without the usual cushion of anger, it was proving to be extremely hard. "Now that I hear you, I think I should really consider myself lucky that I had more time to spend with him." I sniffed but didn't reply. She sighed. "Don't worry. We'll definitely pay the Combine back for every loved one that they've oppressed and taken."
I should have felt guilty about lying but, considering I'd never had time to grieve my parents' deaths at until that point, I didn't really care. The happy feeling I had was suddenly replaced by a crushing decades old sadness.
&*()_(*&
After my episode, I had a sort of, delayed depression and tried my best to drown myself in my work. Keyword: tried. For some reason, Alyx had felt it her mission to become my personal human flouter. She made sure I ate all my meals, slept at a reasonable hour, bathed, and got out for at least 2 hours, whether she escorted me around or dragged me, kicking and screaming away from my work table. The later was more frequent then I would ever admit.
"I had someone there for me and I think that you should have someone for you too," was her explanation.
I scoffed. "Why don't you bother your boyfriend?"
She sighed. "Being a bitch toward me isn't going to make me go away you know."
I chose to shoot another head crab in the far distance with my shotgun. "I'm just annoyed because you're practically letting them win." I shot the crab but it wasn't dead center. The poor thing limped away with a useless leg. "I only have a week to perfect that suit and it could still use some work. I don't see Magnuson taking a break."
Alyx scowled in my direction, probably because she hated whiners and that was exactly what I was doing. "Would you stop that and I'm not letting them win."
"You're actions say different." I aimed again and put the thing out of it's misery.
"I was actually doing this for your benefit." She aimed and shot a head crab dead center. "You told me you never handled these kinds of guns before but you seem to be pretty good for someone who's only had a month of practice."
"Yeah, well, you're full of it." I raised my shot gun to my waist and used my index finger to guide the barrel of the gun to its target. I shot and it landed its mark killing it instantly. Finally.
Alyx watched me and tried to imitate it. I'm not sure where that shot went. Her brows furrowed. "How are you doing that?" She asked.
I shrugged. "It's how I learned to shoot a gun. When I first picked one up, it was pretty heavy so I couldn't lift it up. I got use to aiming with my finger." I tried to imitate how everyone else shot their guns. I lifted my arms to eye level, lined up barrel with the head crab and pulled the trigger.
The butt of the gun slammed onto my shoulder. "Oh, God!" I yelled.
Alyx busted out laughing. "That was such an amateur move."
"Oh, shut up." I rubbed my shoulder to help ease the pain. "That's going to bruise later. How do you guys shoot like that?"
Alyx smiled. "You have to plant the butt firmly on your shoulder or the recoil will do that." She demonstrated with her own shotgun. I gingerly imitated. "Line the sights at the top of the barrel with each other and the target, not the barrel." So that's what those things were for. "Now, for a shotgun, make sure that you aim lower because its recoil tends to go upward. Now shoot."
I pulled the trigger and the shotgun recoiled painfully on my already bruised shoulder. This time it wasn't as bad but it still made me wince. I looked up and saw my target dead. "I got it." I grinned over at Alyx who smiled back.
"Great! I'm not sure how you aim with the way that you shoot but was it easier that time around?"
"Yeah, it actually was. Teach me how to do that with a magnum."
"Don't you have a suit to perfect?" She asked with a smirk.
I scratched the back of my head with a sheepish smile. "I guess the best targeting system is going to help me if I don't know how to aim right?"
We spent the rest of the day shooting at head crabs. By the end of the day, I was so tired I didn't have the energy to be depressed and I think that was exactly what Alyx had intended.
You guys are going to need to tell me how I did on this one. I'm not too happy with it. Constructive criticism is appreciated. Thanks
