I woke up as sunlight began to seep into my room. I walked across the hall into the bathroom, taking some clean clothes with me. I entered the shower, finding the cold water refreshing. I got out, dried myself and got dressed putting the swimming trunks on in place of underwear. I heard Kohta groan. I laughed to myself and grabbed a paracetamol out of one of the bags from the drugstore.

"Here. You'll feel better. Go take a shower. The cold water will help." I advised, handing Kohta the pill. He thanked me and walked up the stairs to the bathroom.

"I made sushi for our trip to the beach!" Saeko smiled. She seemed to be in a good mood.

"Awesome! You always make the best sushi." I beamed. She looked surprised at this turn in behaviour. In truth, I hadn't changed my mood. I was simply resolving to be different outwardly. This issue was between she and I. No need to drag the others into it. I didn't even begrudge Takashi in this situation. The best man would win, and I knew I was not the best man. I'd face this with a smile, that would be the best way to defy all of this. Alice came down to the kitchen area and rubbed her eyes. I gave her a quick hug.

"Go get dressed. Get your bathing suit on underneath." I said. Making an effort to not be commanding.

I picked my guitar up and began to pack the carrier bags of things we had taken in the mall back into the carts.

"The beach is about a ten minute walk. We can go to the police station first and stop by the beach for a few hours when we know where your dad is." I said to Rei as she rubbed her aching temples.

"Sounds good. Oww, I really shouldn't have had that much to drink last night. Did I do anything embarrassing?" She asked.

"You kept talking about how Takashi was the best and singing badly with the songs I was playing. So nothing particularly bad, no."

"Ugh. Why?"

"Cause Takashi's obviously the best. You spent most of the night arguing your case because I kept screwing with you."

"Why did you encourage me?"

"I just like messing with drunk people. I know: I'm an asshole."

"You're not an asshole. Why would you call yourself an asshole?"

"No, the asshole thing was in regard to my habit of eating babies." I joked. She laughed. And then moaned.

"Don't make me laugh. It hurts my head." I handed her a paracetamol too. She swallowed it and thanked me. Everyone else left the house. Alice was holding hands with Shizuka who led her as they walked.

"So, before we go to the beach we have to stop at the police station. Rei's father might be there, or at least we'd some kind of indication as to where he might be. Once we know our next destination we'll spend some time resting at the beach. I know we all want to have fun, but it's important we do this before anything else." Takashi said. Everyone acknowledged what had been said and we continued on.

Saeko rushed to me.

"I want to talk about last night." She said

"I don't." I snapped.

"I'm sorry. I understand that this could damage your pride." She said

"My pride?! You know the real me, do you think this has anything to do with pride?! The last of my pride slipped away and began to turn into self hatred about the same time I became aware of my own existence."

"Sorry"

"For God's sake, don't be sorry. It's not your fault. But if this is what it's going to be, I'm not sure if it's worth waiting to hear what I already know you've decided. I'm trying very hard not to be bitter or angry, and that might be hard for a while. But I'll get there."

"What do you mean I've already decided?"

"Isn't it obvious? Everyone knows it but you. I can see it in your eyes."

"I don't think you can. I haven't decided. You just like to think that you can read me."

"All I know is, he's the better man anyway."

"Maybe I don't deserve the better man. Maybe I don't even want him."

"Something inside you must want him, otherwise this wouldn't be happening. So this is just a matter of you thinking you don't deserve him. And that makes me the asshole that you think you deserve even though you don't want me at all. Why would you think that?"

"Because of my monster."

"And what exactly is that?"

"I was walking back from school one day, and this man came out of nowhere. He tried to attack me. I let him at first, acting helpless when I wasn't. I had my training sword with me. I fought back. Shattered his collarbone and broke his ankle, I think. I enjoyed doing it. Having an enemy that I didn't have to question was a joy."

"So, that means that instead of the man you want you're stuck with this self destructive asshole."

"No. I didn't think I deserved anyone. I had a crush on you for a very long time. I never told you because I was afraid you were too good for me."

"And when you saw me that day you realised I was just as low as you thought of yourself."

"Well, when you put it like that..."

"That's exactly what it was though. And I don't see that side of you the way you do. There may be some sadism behind it, but we're all guilty of that every once in a while. You were happy to have an unquestioned enemy because you felt like you had a purpose. You didn't have to stop and consider this a grey area. You knew what you had to do and you knew you could do it. I know you, you found more joy in knowing you could do what you had to than you did in actually harming him."

"Don't tell me what I thought! I did enjoy hurting him. That's what I found the pleasure in." She snapped. I didn't say anything.

"Takashi and I were split from the main group a few days ago. I told him about this just as I was ready to give up on life. He accepted me and made himself my reason to live. I would have taken my own life without him. Just like you."

"Well, whatever the case is. To me it seems like we have two sides of the same monster inside us."

"Yeah. Yours is inwardly sadistic and mine is outwards."

"It doesn't make a difference, Saeko."

"Why not?"

"Because it's the same damn thing either way. Besides, you can keep yours under control. I know where this ends for me. And it terrifies me. I was one step away from the end this time yesterday. And the truth is, I kind of enjoyed it."

"So you're saying you would have been happier if I'd just left you to it?"

"No. But part of me would have been satisfied. The same part of you that would have found satisfaction in leaving me to it."

Saeko stiffened and went pale. The look in her eyes showed me that what I had said was true. And the look I gave her showed that I meant it.

"What are you two talking about?" Rei teased unable to hear us, we'd been sharing a different sort of intimate moment. Takashi gave a slightly defeated look at Saeko, who mirrored his look over her shoulder at him.

"You don't have to stay up here. Go back to them if you want." I said to Saeko.

"Oh, so now you want rid of me?!" She shouted, angrily.

"No. You want rid of me."

"I don't know what I want anymore." We walked the rest of the way to the police station wordlessly.

When we arrived I drew my new katana. There were several of Them outside the police station. Saeko drew her sword too.

"Don't shoot if you can help it. It'll just attract more." I said. The others drew their weapons, ready to fight. I charged first, slicing fluidly and quickly across the arms and legs of one of Them. It fell and I slashed upwards, beheading it and bringing the sword down slightly to behead the one next to it too. Saeko came to my side, slicing at Them with a grace and control I could never quite equal. But there was something I had that Saeko didn't: a little more strength behind my sword's blows. I knocked Them to the floor with brutish strength, despite not being particularly muscular. Saeko trailed behind me, twirling and spinning with her sword flying through the air in tight arcs to finish the ones I left on the ground. We cleared Them up quickly. Except for one. A SWAT officer in full riot gear was stood right by the door. He was one of Them.

"Great." I said, sarcastically.

Takashi clubbed at it with his shotgun. It fell to the floor but hadn't sustained any actual damage. The others stayed back, hoping to avoid using their guns. I pulled at the helmet it was wearing, it flailed its arms at me and groaned, but I got the helmet off. I then stabbed it with my katana. Kota checked the weapons that the officer had on him. He handed a pistol to Saeko and told her what it was and how to use it. I paid close attention to his information. He also found a leg holster for the pistol, which he gave to her.

The outside was clear now, but I had a feeling there would be at least a few of Them inside.

"Rei and Kohta, come with us. Saya and Shizuka, stay out here with Alice and Zeke and protect the supplies." Takashi said. I opened the entrance door to meet with one of Them right in my face. I stabbed my katana through its head. I pulled away and let it drop. I took a few steps in and slashed horizontally at around head height, taking the tops of the heads off two of Them. Saeko barged past me and finished another of Them off with a stab to the back of its head. Her sword split through the top of its skull with ease and she sliced upwards through the torso of another one of Them. The place was clear, there were none of Them left any more. I looked at the pair I had killed and found a bloodstained photo of the two of them as humans. They had been a couple. Takashi picked up on this observation too.

"At least they died together." He said, solemnly. I nodded in agreement.

"Not much consolation though, is it? None of this should be happening in the first place." I said.

"Kohta and Tatsuzo go into the armory and evidence room, see what you can find." He ordered. I opened the armory door with my katana drawn. None of Them were in there. Kota grabbed more ammunition and a small submachine gun that he told me was an MP5. I studied the rest of the weapons there and looked at him quizzically.

"The rest of it is worse equipment than we've got." He said. I nodded again. He left and checked the evidence room. He found a shotgun.

"Benelli M4 Super 90." He said, handing it to me.

"Looks like this could do some damage!" I said with a smile as I felt the weight of it and slid the pump underneath the barrel. He gave me a quick run through of how to use the shotgun and showed me how to load it.

"This one holds eight shells at a time." He said. I exited the evidence room, slinging the shotgun across my back with the strap adjusted so it was tight. Saeko eyed the shotgun I was carrying. It seemed like me and Kohta returning dispersed some of the awkwardness between Takashi and the girls.

"Hey, take this. It's more your style." I said, handing Takashi the shotgun. Kohta looked at me quizzically.

"I can't use it. It would weigh me down." I said.

"Wait here then." He said. Slightly disappointed, he entered the armory again and found a pistol similar to the one he had given Saeko. He gave me a tutorial on how to use it and a holster, which I put on my waist.

Rei was still searching for evidence of her father. She stopped at a chalkboard.

"This is my father's writing!" She exclaimed. I read it; it said to go to Shintoko Third Elementary School for an evacuation.

"I didn't think they'd still be evacuating." I said, surprised.

"My mother works at that school." Takashi said.

"Well, let's go then. The beach can wait." I said.

"No. The evacuation is in three days. If my dad and Takashi's mother are safe there, then they'll be ok by the time we get there. We can still go to the beach." Rei said. Takashi smiled in agreement. This surprised me.

"Good. I was worried I'd made sushi for nothing." Saeko beamed. We exited the police station. Kota handed Saya the MP5 as she complained about how she felt useless in combat.

Everyone was in a good mood and I found it infectious. I took one of the carts and pushed it towards the beach. Rei took the other one.

"Five minute walk away from the beach." I declared. Alice cheered. The walk was short and uneventful. I was alone at the front of the group. I could hear the others chatting, but couldn't distinguish anything they were saying. I threw my shotgun in the cart and heard Zeke bark with alarm, popping his head up from in between the carrier bags.

"Sorry buddy, I forgot you were in there." I said, petting him. He nuzzled against my hand, prompting me to keep petting him as a pushed the cart. I was feeling very distracted. I couldn't stop thinking of Saeko. I could still taste her lips from last night, and it intoxicated me. A particular song came into my head, one that I was beginning to associate with her. I decided I'd play it on my guitar when we got to the beach. When we got to the sandy area that we'd called the beach I looked out across the water. The water from the river was very open and fairly deep. I pulled Zeke out of the cart. The girls had taken a towel for him with a dog bone motif on it. I smiled at him as he wagged his tail and stumbled around on the sand. I took my hoodie and T-shirt off and threw them in the cart with my shotgun. I then pulled my jeans off so I was down to the swimming trunks. I looked at the sun and approximated the time to be about 11 o'clock now. Everyone else was taking their clothes off too. Everyone except for Kohta. They all ran into the water. Rei screamed as she felt how cold the water was. Having only got about ankle deep in the water. Takashi tried to push Rei into the water.

"Help me out here!" He said to me. I ran to him and Rei, kicking up sand as I did so. He grabbed her by the arms and I took her legs. We swung her back and forth a couple of times making sure we wouldn't hurt her when we let go.

"On three." I said.

"Three... Two... One..." Takashi said and we both let go, slinging her forwards into the water. She squealed and hit the water with a splash. She surfaced again, hair soaked through and taking a darker brown colour now. Takashi jumped in after her. Alice skipped into the water, hesitating slightly when she felt how cold it was. I roared and chased after her. She screamed and ran in. Saeko, Shizuka and Saya ran in together. I ran forwards and jumped with a quick flip.

I broke through the surface of the water and gasped. Everyone was soaked and glaring at me. I worked out that my entrance had splashed everyone. They all started trying to splash me. I flinched away for a moment before splashing back again. I tried to keep my returning splashes subdued, as I didn't want anyone to see my scars. Keeping my arms exposed for as little time as possible. I swam around a little and ignored their splashes at me and they began to splash at each other. I went under the water and opened my eyes, against the instinct as a thought I'd had began to instill fear in me. The water was clear enough for me to open my eyes and still be able to see. The water was deep, but not deep enough for me to be unable to see the bottom. I swam downwards and looked around. My fears fell away again as I saw that it was clear. It had only just occurred to me that some of Them might be lurking at the bottom of the water since they were far too lacking in co-ordination to actually swim. Fortunately, there were none. Perhaps something about the water and what few senses they had didn't mix. I emerged from the water again and felt a strange weight on top of my shoulders. I looked up to see Saya on top of my shoulders.

"What the hell are you doing? Y-" I cut her off by throwing her off of me and into the water. Everyone laughed as she flailed and fell in. She surfaced again and was about to yell at me again. Saeko splashed her and gave me a surprisingly warm smile. We splashed and swam around for a bit longer.

"Who's hungry?" Saeko asked.

"I am!" I yelled and threw my hand up like a schoolchild.

"Me too!" Takashi exclaimed and copied my gesture. Everyone else followed suit and we left the water. I dried myself off with a towel and sat down on the sand. Saeko handed out portions of sushi to everyone. We all thanked her and began eating. I took a bite.

"This is just as delicious as I remember, thank you." I said with a small smile. She beamed back at me, proud of herself and appreciative of the comment. I finished my sushi alarmingly fast and took to my guitar. I strummed a little before settling on a song. I opened with some reggae style chords.

"I don't practice Santeria. I ain't got no crystal ball." I began to sing. As Rei finished her sushi she took Takashi's hand and began dancing on the sand with him. He stumbled on the sand as he awkwardly followed her lead. As everyone else finished their food they got up and began dancing too. Saeko and Shizuka danced together and Saya and Kohta danced with each other as Alice chased Zeke around the sand. I finished the song and kept playing fun and summery songs to match the current mood. We danced and swam the rest of the day away until nightfall approached. We used the last of the daylight to pack up and head back towards my friend's house for the night. I used the towel to get the last of the sand out and dry off properly. We walked back to the house, talking the whole way about what a great time we'd had. I even received a few compliments on my playing, which felt nice. We got through the door and I brought the carrier bags full of supplies from the carts back into the house again. I was in a good mood in spite of everything. Of course my mind switched itself back on the moment I realised that I had been enjoying myself. I resolved that while this would be gone completely by tomorrow, I'd enjoy what little happiness I had left.