Okay, here we go! I should note, for anyone who might care to know this sort of information, that it was always my intent to kick off the crossover element by playing background-ninja in the episode "Say Uncle". And so, here it is!
Note: Details may have been altered, as I'm writing events of the episode largely from memory. Don't chew me out too hard for getting something wrong, okay?
Steven Universe and all related characters belong to Rebecca Sugar and Cartoon Network.
So Uncle Grandpa and I were riding on the back of Giant Realistic Flying Tiger, speeding through the Plot Hole to reach Beach City. Almost as soon as we had arrived, Uncle Grandpa turned to me and said, "I'm gonna take some time to set up, so you should go look around a bit. I'll just let you off here..." And then he shoved me off of Tiger.
I should mention we were still in the air.
I crashed into the sands of Beach City Beach face-first. I picked myself up and brushed off the sand that clung to my clothes.
"Ohmygosh! Are you okay?" A young boy's voice asked.
"Surprisingly, yes," I replied. "That sort of thing's been happening to me a lot, lately." And then I noticed who I was speaking to. "Holy crap, you're Steven Universe!"
He looked at me quizzically, "How do you know who I am?"
"Oh, uh... Internet?"
"Ah, right! Ronaldo's blog!" Steven declared as though it were the obvious conclusion.
"So, uh, if you don't mind me asking, what were you doing out here, before my sudden appearance so rudely interrupted things?" I asked.
"Well, it's kind of a long story, but, us Crystal Gems can summon magical weapons from our gemstones. Mine is a shield, but I've been having trouble summoning it on command." He let out a heavy sigh, "I wish there was someone who could help me with this."
SUDDENLY...
Heralded by a pod of dolphins, a giant seashell rose out of the water, and opened to reveal...
UNCLE GRANDPA IN SLIGHTLY DISTURBING ROSE QUARTZ COSPLAY!
"GOOD MORNING!" shouted everyone's favorite senile reality warper.
"UNCLE GRANDPA!" Steven cried, "I don't believe it!" After a moment of thought, he added, "No, really, I don't believe it, how are you here?"
Uncle G put an arm around Steven's shoulders. "Don't worry, kid, none of this is canon." The arm then popped loose as he sprouted a new one, which he used to reach into Belly Bag. "BUT THIS IS!" he shouted, pulling out an artillery cannon, which he then loaded with his own head and fired as we all saluted.
The head flew off toward the horizon, where it struck a ship and caused it to sink. But I didn't pay much attention to that, instead I quietly snuck away to explore the Crystal Gems' temple. And let me say it is quite a majestic sight to see in person. I took my camera from my travel bag and snapped a few quick pictures for my records.
It was about that point when the commotion over Uncle Grandpa's methods for helping with Steven's problem began to happen. I quickly rushed back to the beach because I'd left my Plot Device in the RV while it ran through self-diagnostics, and if Uncle G left without me, I'd be stuck unless he decided to come back.
I caught up to Uncle G just in time to be there when he asked Belly Bag to generate a Plot Hole to escape through. The plot hole swirled around us and I somehow ended up passing out.
I awoke with a start to find myself back in my room on the UGRV, lying on top of my freshly made bed. Apparently, Uncle G had been thoughtful enough to drop me off there after I passed out, though he crammed poor Steven into the glove box in the cockpit, if I was correctly remembering how the episode went. I checked on the status of my Plot Device, and found that the startup sequence had been completed, and it was ready to move on to registering its new user. Which I did, but it was kind of a boring process so I won't go into detail.
After I had spent a minute or so familiarizing myself with how it worked, I pocketed the device and headed into the living area just in time to find Mr. Gus discussing Steven's power source. And his gemsona. ("His gem is on his tail, and his weapon is a fryin' pan!") Meanwhile Pizza Steve was complaining to Uncle G that he thought they had all agreed that the UGRV had a One Steve Limit. And then Steven joined the conversation, stating that it's okay because his name is Steven, not Steve, but of course Pizza Steve was having none of that, and then while he thought nobody was looking, he donned a Steven Universe cosplay and hopped into a conveniently open plot hole. After double-checking that I understood how to use my Plot Device (and ensuring I had the user's manual in my bag, just in case), I decided to follow him.
There, in more or less the middle of the vast expanse of nothing that was the Plot Hole, were the Crystal Gems. Being pestered by Pizza Steve(n Universe).
"THAT'S NOT MY BABY!" Pearl shouted.
"Mmmmm, pizza..." Amethyst drooled. And then she proceeded to eat Pizza Steve, pulling his shades out of her mouth and putting them on as if to say "Yeah, I just ate a main character from another show. Deal with it." It was kinda funny in the episode, but seeing it in person, it was actually pretty disturbing.
(Pizza Steve would later reappear on the UGRV traumatized, but otherwise unharmed. Such, I suppose, is the magic of the Plot Hole.)
Suddenly, Garnet just magically popped up behind me. "And who are you?" she asked.
"Um..." I considered how to proceed, before deciding to just come clean. "I was following the pizza slice."
"If you wanted to eat it, you're too late." Amethyst said.
"Do you, maybe, know how to get out of here?" Pearl asked, appearing to calm down slightly.
I pulled out my Plot Device. "Maybe." Starting up an app marked "Plot Hole Scanner", I waved the device around semi-dramatically. The device made a "PING" sound as Uncle Grandpa and Steven flew by, likely on their way back to Beach City.
"AFTER THEM!" shouted Garnet, and the Gems ran off behind the senile old reality warper who had, from their perspective, kidnapped their half-gem friend.
Suddenly, we were all back on the Beach City beach, with the Crystal Gems leaping at Uncle Grandpa, weapons out, ready to destroy. Steven leaped in front of him and in a blinding flash, he stopped the Gems with his shield.
"Hey, I did it!" Steven cried happily.
And so the Gems stopped trying to harm Uncle Grandpa, Uncle Grandpa apologized for any trouble his appearance in their world caused, and we all shared a good laugh.
"Well, my work here is done." Uncle Grandpa declared. "You ready to head back, Noah?"
"Actually, since I've got my Plot Device up and running, I figured I might just stay here a bit longer. Take in more of the sights Beach City has to offer," I said, holding up the Device so he could see it.
"Oh, okay. You sure you don't need to get your stuff from the RV?"
I clicked into an app on the Plot Device and my stuff materialized in a small pile in front of me. "Nah, I'm good," I said as I zapped the pile into a convenient non-dimensional storage space.
"All right, then, I'll see you around, Noah!" Uncle Grandpa called, as he disappeared into another plot hole.
"Wait, you were with that madman?" Pearl asked.
"Not entirely by choice, I can assure you." I set my Plot Device in Sleep Mode and put it in my travel bag, then set off toward the city. "If you'll excuse me, I'd like to do a bit of sightseeing."
"Oh! I can show you around!" Steven shouted.
At that point, my stomach grumbled in the manner that could only happen in a cartoon. "First off, something to eat would be great..."
"I know just the place! Do you like french fries?"
A/N: Holy crap I keep managing to top my previous word count with each new chapter. In fact, this one perhaps contains the largest amount of plot-related words I've written for a fanfic in a loooooong time.
I need to find more time to write stuff...
