Forgot to say last chapter anything in italics is Face's dreams. Thanks for reading and please review I like to know what people think and I don't mind constructive critism either :D

Clamping his mouth shut, Face fell backwards onto the bed, feeling hot tears building up as fast as the waves of memories colliding around his head. A dream. It was just a dream. But if it was why had it hurt? A small voice in his head was telling him it was the ghost pain of the memory but Face wasn't listening to it. All he could do was lay there letting the wave of memories come over him. 7

It was the same. Every single one of those memories was the same. They all hurt. Each time something new hurt but it was all the same. Every memory held more and more pain. Face remembered each night, lying awake in bed trying to sleep through the fresh waves of pain the so called 'therapy' had caused him. Remembered waking up some nights crying and screaming. He'd been punished for that. The punishments made by the nurses were more brutal than the therapy caused by the doctors. Hurt. Pain. Why wouldn't the memories stop?

The sound of a door handle brought Face back to the here and now. Taking a large breath of air, Face closed his eyes and desperately tried to keep his breathing even. It didn't fool whoever was standing by his bed though because he didn't move.

"You alright kid?" It was Hannibal. That was good. Grasp onto Hannibal's voice. That'll keep the memories at bay. For now at least. "Kid?" Face realised he wasn't answering.

Opening his mouth to answer, Face felt a bubble of emotion well up in his throat. "m' fine." Face managed to get out before turning his body away from the Colonel. He heard a sigh from behind him.

"No you aren't kid. What's wrong?" The bed dipped down as Hannibal sat on it. A comforting hand was placed on face's shoulder, only making him flinch away. The memories where too raw. He couldn't bear to think of them but he couldn't stop. They just kept rushing forwards.

Face clenched his teeth, stopping himself from telling Hannibal. It was his problem. He could deal with t. Would deal with it. Hannibal didn't need to worry. "Go 'way." Face mumbled.

Thinking Hannibal had gone when he felt the dip of the bed disappear, Face let a few of the tears that where building in his eyes fall. "I'm doing this for your own good Face." Hannibal's words fell on deaf ears as another memory gripped Face. Before Face could protest Hannibal stuck him with a needle, knocking him unconscious. Unbeknownst to the colonel, the memory Face had been thinking of was worse than that of the nightmares and Hannibal had just thrown Face into it, with no ways of waking up.

Hannibal sat on the bed, sighing heavily. Face was still in the bed but his face would have told a different story. He hadn't seen Face like this since after the POW camps, whatever was on Face's mind needed sorted. But how could he sort it when Face wouldn't even tell him what was wrong.

Hesitantly, Hannibal looked back at the younger man before leaving the rom to get the others. He knew Face would be mad when he woke up but they needed to be there. Face wouldn't talk to him on his own but there was no way he'd ignore all of them together.

"What's up Colonel?" Murdock asked as soon as he opened the door. "Is it Face?" Hannibal nodded. Murdock took on an oddly serious look before nodding. "I'll go sit with him."

Hannibal nodded gratefully at the Captain. BA had already woken up and was pulling on his shoes. "What's happened?"

"I don't know but we're going to get to the bottom of it." Hannibal stated, leaving the room to get Amy. Even though Amy hadn't known them as long as they'd known each other she was still apart of the team. Anyway, they were going to need all the help they could get if they were going to get Face to talk.

"Guessing we're holding off on the plan." Amy stated as she and Hannibal walked back.

"Yeah. At least until we find out what's wrong with Face." Amy looked at him with a sad look.

"It's my fault Face is like this. I should never have mentioned it." Hannibal shook his head.

"Don't blame yourself kid. Face needs you as much as he needs the rest of the team."

They found Murdock sat on the edge of the bed, watching Face as he started to toss and turn. "You shouldn't have given him BA's night night juice." Murdock's tone was accusing.

"Fools right Hannibal." BA growled. Hannibal nodded his agreement. He didn't know why he'd done it. Maybe it had something to with the way Face had started to toss and turn like he was in the grips of a memory.

Murdock took one look at Hannibal's guilty face and instantly regretted feeling angry towards the Colonel. Hannibal wasn't to know what would happen. "It's not your fault Hannibal."

"How's he doing?" Hannibal's asked, sitting next to Murdock on the bed. The pilot was busy muttering soft words to Face that might calm him down. It didn't seem to be doing much good.

"Not good Hannibal. He don't look good at all." BA sounded concerned. Hell he was concerned. Concerned and angry. His lil' brother was hurting but it wasn't anything he could help with. It was in his mind. Just like the crazy fools crazy. In his mind.

Amy looked about ready to cry but she wouldn't let herself lose control. Face needed her. Hannibal had said as much. "Is there anything we can do?" Hannibal shook his head in reply.

"We've just got to wait until he wakes up. Hopefully he'll let us help him." Hannibal stated.

"If the fool don't let us help him then he's got me to answer to." BA growled. But that was easier said than done they all knew how Face was when it came to getting help. Sure he could moan about miniscule things but when it mattered Face wouldn't say a word. He'd deal with it himself.

Face's POV

"I'm sorry." A young Face stood looking up at the woman with sad eyes. He was sorry so sorry. He hadn't meant to do it. It was just instinct. Face hadn't wanted to be hit again. It hurt.

"You stupid little boy. Do you not want me to be happy!" His mother screamed at him, making tears form in his eyes. "Don't cry. Hell Don't even speak. I don't want you getting in the way anymore!" She yelled.

"I'm sorry." The 4 year old mumbled.

"Don't say it again!" The woman screeched at her son. Face felt the tears fall down his face, making the woman even angrier. She smacked him on the ear, causing the little boy to cry more and more. The sobs violently racked his body. It hurt. Why wouldn't she just stop it? Stop it! Stop it!" She kept repeating it.

After every hit the woman would say it until the boy was silent. Tears still fell down his cheeks but he didn't say anything. Didn't want to say anything. If he made a sound his Mummy would hit him again. And when it wasn't his mummy then it was one of the men she brought home. All the time. It hurt all the time. Why wouldn't they stop? But Face wouldn't ask them to. The little boy just took it in silence.

"He's coming round." Face heard Murdock say happily. When did Murdock get here? Everything was foggy. Why was it all so foggy?

Trying to sit up, Face fell back on the bed with a groan. The world was spinning. "Just relax Faceman." BA was there to. Someone was holding him down, gently.

"What happened?" Face asked. The world was getting clearer now and he could see the concerned look that passed between Hannibal and BA. Murdock was sat watching Face with sad brown eyes. Amy was there too, standing just at the back of the group, tars clear in her eyes.

"You don't remember." The last thing Face remembered was his mother. But that was a dream. A memory in his head. Shaking his head to clear it a sudden thought passed through his head.

"You drugged me didn't you?" Face asked accusingly. Hannibal had the decency to look guilty. "Why the hell did you do that?" Face's voice was oddly calm. A contrast to what he was really feeling. He wondered why he sounded so calm when he was furious at them.

"Seemed like a good idea at the time." Face laughed. A harsh sounding laugh.

"A good idea. A good idea. Why the hell do you think it was a good idea?" The anger was leaking through into Face's voice now.

"It wasn't Hannibal's fault, Face." Murdock tried to put a comforting hand on Face shoulder but he shrugged it off. Lifting himself off of the bed, Face glared at his CO.

"Well. Why the hell did you drug me?"

"Kid, you were completely out of it. What else was I supposed to do?" That stumped Face. Drugs. That's what they'd used in the… no he wouldn't. He wouldn't let himself think of that. Not again. Not in front of the team. He couldn't let himself lose control.

"Face are you alright?" Murdock asked him, gently sitting him back on the bed. No. Face wasn't alright. Shaking his head, Face closed his eyes. The memories wouldn't go away. They'd been locked away for so long. Locked and forgotten about. Now they were out though. And Face didn't think he'd be able to lock them away again.

"No Murdock. No I'm not alright."