Hey everyone, thanks for all the reviews even though it's only been a few days. To thor94, just keep reading. I have a no spoiler policy :).

Anyways, here's the next chapter, sort of on time (the last one was a bit late). Oh, and I'm borrowing a couple jokes for this chapter from the Naruto Abridged series, only because their randomizing computer makes things a lot more interesting. Just a small disclaimer.

Hope you enjoy,

Trouble 1

MINOR EDITS DONE 6/12/17
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"YOU'RE LATE!" Sakura yelled from behind me somewhere as Kakashi and I shunshined into the meeting place.

I stiffened a wince as I tried to figure out why she was shouting so much, it was only ten minutes.

"Well, you see, there was this blind man that got lost so me and Kaka-sensei had to make sure he got to where he was going safely."

"We're in the middle of the forest," Shikamaru pointed out, sounding bored.

"Um, he was very lost?"

"How troublesome," he stated, barely heard underneath Sakura's "LIAR!" If she only knew how close to the truth it was.

"Kakashi, I'd prefer if you saved the corrupting of your student until after the exams." The hokage sounded almost exasperated as he spoke. "At least then he'd have a fair chance of showing up on time."

"I'll try, hokage-sama, but it's hard to convince a student to not mimic their role model," Kakashi said sagely. I heard the other man sigh. "I mean, look at Gai and Lee."

The mentioned duo started shouting each other's names as they prepared their sunset genjutsu of death, I mean youth. At the sound of the traumatized/disgusted populous, I was suddenly a bit glad I couldn't see it.

"Moving on. Naruto, if you could join the others I'll get started." I panicked for a moment, trying to come up with a good excuse.

"I'd rather not."

"And why is that?"

"Well, they're kinda mad at me so if I go over there, they could hurt me." There was silence after that, probably from confusion. So Kakashi decided to explain.

"They had to carry him back because he knocked himself out with a tree."

"A tree?!" Ino exclaimed. "How the hell do you knock yourself out with a TREE?!"

"It's a talent." I pretended to flip my imaginary long hair over my shoulder. "And I'm not sharing!"

"Why would anyone want to-" Ino was about to continue when the Hokage cut her off.

"Ok, that's enough. If you feel more comfortable where you are then you may stay. It doesn't matter much anyways."

"Thanks jiji!" I heard a few people make disapproving sounds at that, but I didn't really care.

"Now, before we get started, let me just say that from here on out, you will not be working in teams. So when I say you have the option to drop out, your personal choice will not affect your teammates.

"But before we get to that, I must announce that due to the number of you that passed the second test, we are going to have to run a preliminary test as soon as I'm done. So if any of you feel as if you are not up to a one-on-one fight then please withdraw from the exam."

Kakashi nudged me as two of the other contestants dropped out. The first guy kinda sounded like the spectacles man we ran into. The second was announced to be some kid from Taki, who apparently got his leg broken out in the forest. The whole time, that poor kid's teammates were shouting at him to "come back and face it like a man", or at least the feminine sounding one was. She probably wasn't that stable of an individual, especially if she thinks her teammate can fight on a pair of crutches.

"You should drop too," Kakashi whispered, snapping me back to the present. "You're not ready for this yet."

"I can do it."

"Naruto-"

"I can do it sensei." There was a disapproving silence before I spoke up again. "At least let me see who my opponent is."

He thought it through for a few seconds.

"Alright, but if I say it's too difficult then you forfeit. Ok?"

"I guess, but that's not going to be a problem. I can handle anyone they throw at me, datteboyo!"

I could hear him chuckle as a set of double doors closed with a thud.

"Is there anyone else that wishes to leave?" the hokage asked, when no one spoke up, he continued, going into this long spiel about war, or war substitute or something like that. Again, I wasn't really listening, opting to try and figure out how to keep my eyes a secret.

After all, Kakashi said earlier (during my fifth bowl of ramen to be exact), that only a blind man, or ANOTHER blind man, would be unable to see that my eyes weren't tracking. I mean, I can't keep my eyes shut forever, it would eventually get me into trouble, especially considering I doubt my opponent would like it.

As I thought this, I was vaguely aware of the hokage's speech being interrupted by Gai shouting something about saving some poor kids "Flames of Youth" before his "eternal rival" could do anymore damage. It wasn't until a hand landed on my shoulder that I was shocked out of my thoughts.

"No need to worry, I shall make sure your Flames of Youth stay bright! And if I fail, I'll-"

"Did you say something?" I asked, unknowingly parroting my sensei's line.

"NO! IT'S TOO LATE! HIS COOL, HIP ATTITUDE HAS ALREADY SPREAD!"

Kakashi snickered as the hokage then decided that this would be a good time to gain back control.

"…And now, on with the preliminaries," he announced, getting everyone's attention again. "Each match will be chosen randomly by our randomizing computer. As long as it doesn't glitch again."

He ended up whispering the last part to himself, making me wonder what he meant by that, and why Kakashi was chuckling. After it was announced that Sasuke and this other dude I didn't know were up first, Kakashi shunshined the pair of us somewhere else.

"We're on the balcony above the arena." I heard everyone else climbing up the stairs that we essentially skipped.

"Ok. Hey, why does that computer thingy glitch? If it's such a great piece of technology, they shouldn't have a problem with it, right?" He started chuckling again, making me even more curious. "And why do you find it so funny?"

"Well, you see, it was created about fifteen, sixteen years ago by the fourth."

"The fourth hokage?"

"No, the fourth ramen stand owner." The sarcasm was practically dripping off his words. "Yes, the fourth hokage, back before he was hokage. He was a great seal master and that thing runs entirely on seals."

"So?"

"Well there were only three seal users in the village, one being the fourth, another was his sensei, while the last was a…close friend of his. Now, what you have to understand about this friend is that she was one hell of a prankster, as in you would be amateur in her eyes. A good amateur, but one none the less.

"Really? Why haven't I heard of her? Where is she now?"

"Unfortunately she died the same night as the forth." I looked towards the ground. I knew that was just a nice way of saying that it was in the Kyuubi attacked. "But not without leaving a few things to be remembered by."

"Like what?" I glanced back up towards him, curious once again.

"Well, for one, that computer." I gave him an odd look and he continued. "When the forth was making it, this friend decided to help him. So one night he was out on a mission she snuck into his house and made a few adjustments. Now whenever it's used a few, unexpected pairing pop up. They never know when but every time it does, everyone that knows about her prank has to chuckle."

"So not everyone knows who did it?"

"Very few do."

"Then how do you know?"

"The forth was my sensei. I had to listen to him complain about it for months afterwards. Why are you gawking at me like that?"

"The Forth was your sensei?!"

"Didn't I say so before?"

"NO!"

"Maa maa, anyways I had to listen to him complain for a long time after that, especially considering neither he nor his sensei, Jiraiya, could fix it."

"Why not?"

"She was from a very elite clan that specialized in sealing," he told me.

I wanted to know more, all of this sounded so interesting. I was about to ask another question when I was interrupted.

"Here, we'll talk more on this later. Right now we should be supporting your teammate while he's fighting."

"He's fighting?"

"For the past two minutes."

"Oh well, it's not like I can watch," I said quietly. "Hey, won't people know if I'm not watching the fight?"

"Hmm, good question."

He sat there quietly for a moment before he spoke up again.

"Ah, here." I heard him rustling through a pack before he pulled something out. "Catch."

I held my hand out just in time to catch whatever he threw. After further examination I figured out it was a book.

"If you pretend to read it, people will think you're distracted."

"It's not that pervy book, is it?"

"If I gave you one of those, we'd both get killed, whether you could read it or not," he said, sounding suspiciously seriously.

"So, what is it?"

"It's from the same author as my Icha Icha books. It's his only non-perverted book entitled 'Tale of the Gutsy Ninja.' I'm sure you would have read it as well eventually, if this hadn't happened."

"Ok, as long as it's not going to get me hit."

"The book itself won't, but your inattention might." Before I could reply, there was a crash followed by a loud cheer for most of the female onlookers.

"Let me guess, Sasuke won," I deadpanned right before they announced that I was right.

"Good guess." I opened the book up to the first page, feeling so bored I wished I really could read it. "Now stay right there until I get back. I have to take care of something for Sasuke. And if you're called up before I get back, be smart. If it sounds like a challenge, then back out."

"I can take anyone!"

"Maybe you could before, promise me that if you come up against a strong opponent, back out."

"Alright, I promise."

"Now, no breaking your promise, after all if you do that you'd be breaking your nindo as well."

"I won't break my nindo! Datteboyo!"

"Just making sure."

I stuck my tongue out at him before focusing back on the book. I could hear him chuckle again before he poofed away. After a moment, his voice could be heard speaking on the ground level.

After I heard the two of them were taken off the floor, they announced that Katsu, some guy from Taki, was versing Shino. Well, after they convinced Gai that the Flames of Youth was not a legitimate competitor so it would not be competing against the lesser known Fire Extinguisher of Fate.

I laughed, knowing Kakashi was right about this. Whoever was the mastermind behind this was a pranking genius! If I was still pranking I would definitely take this as a challenge. A trick this epic would be a great thing to aim for. But I had promised Jiji that I'd stop once I was a ninja, and I had. For the most part.

But just for fun, I started thinking of stuff I could have done, during Shino's match. Unfortunately, it was over so quickly that I had only come up with a couple. Apparently he won by sucking the chakra out of the guy until he passed out.

Across the room, I heard some chick laughing hysterically. She yelled something about wondering why his name didn't assure his victory like he said it would. It took me a bit to figure out what she meant, until I remembered that the boy was named Katsu, which meant "victory".

The matches went relatively quickly after that. Kankuro beat the human rubber band, Sakura and Ino decided to just knock each other out instead of actually doing anything. I breathed a sigh of relief at this because the pair of them kept screeching during every match. At least now my ears could get a bit of a rest for a few matches.

And if you're wondering how I knew all of this, for some reason everyone felt like commenting on the fights as they were happening. Not that I was complaining, I just thought it was weird.

Unfortunately, the silence didn't last too long due to the fact that they woke up right after Tenten's humiliating defeat by Temari. It was equally unfortunate when Sakura came over to screech, sorry, I meant speak to me.

"Naruto! Why are you reading? You're supposed to be watching the matches!"

I winced at the shrillness of it once again. It was then that I felt a sudden urge to duck. No sooner did I do so, I feel a woosh go over my head.

"Hey! You're not supposed to DUCK!"

"I wouldn't need to if you didn't try to hit me."

I had to fight the urge to look up at her. Instead I continued to stare at the book, trying to look preoccupied with whatever story was in it.

"Where did you get the book anyways?"

"Kakashi." This time there was no warning before I got wacked upside the head for no reason.

"Naruto! How dare you read that smut!"

"It's not smut," I said as I rubbed my sore head. "Read the title."

I flashed the cover at her before making like I was reading it again, and then turned the page for good measure.

"Oh. And why are you reading a book when you never willingly TOUCHED one in your life?"

"Um, Kakashi said to. Something about freaking Gai out."

I wasn't sure what I'd do if she asked anything else. Just as she started to ask another question, I heard someone clear their throat.

"Yo, Sakura. I heard you had your match already. How was it?" sensei asked, effectively shutting her up.

"Well, it wasn't that bad-"

"Her vs. Ino. Both of them made this huge deal out of it only for it to end in a double knock out," I said simply getting a growl from her in the process.

"She should be proud of herself. After all, it was a tie."

"More like a double loss. To Ino. So probably not."

"Naruto-"

She was about to berate me about that when Shika was announced as the winner.

"'Bout time. Thought it would take forever."

"Well, he's a Nara. They use their mind instead of their fists so it tends to run a little on the long side," Kakashi answered.

"If you insist," I said with a shrug. "Alright! Who's next?"

"Well, it's not Clucky vs. the Log."

"What?" both of us asked.

"If the two of you stop fighting and focus on the task at hand, you would have noticed the quite humorous glitch on the randomizing computer screen. It clearly states that the next opponents are Clucky vs. The Log."

Sakura was silent as I almost busted a gut from laughing so hard. I struggled to get out the single questioning word.

"Why?"

"Apparently she and one of the Uchihas had an argument as academy students about which was stronger, a chicken or our ever present, substitution log. It eventually evolved into what everyone liked to call, Clucky vs. The Log."

"Which side did she take?"

"Clucky, of course."

"Do you think any Uchiha would know about this argument?"

"Probably not. He wouldn't want it to be common knowledge among his clan."

"Would Sasuke know about it?"

"Maybe. After all it was his father that started it."

I could feel the foxlike grin spreading across my face as I put my book down for a moment.

"CLUCKY WILL WIN!"

"Naruto, Sasuke is unconscious in a hospital room at the moment. This means he couldn't possibly hear you."

"Damn, and I wanted to start that up again." I brought my book up to look at it. "Is Jiji done with his hissy fit yet? I wanna know whose next."

"Naruto! The hokage doesn't have hissy fits, you baka!"

"If someone's cursing something out it's usually called a hissy fit, right? I didn't think it changed if it was the hokage doing the swearing."

"Hokage-sama would do no such thing!"

"I can hear him swearing from here!"

"He does look pretty upset," Kakashi backed me up. I heard Sakura take in a breath, getting ready to yell or something, when the hokage cleared his throat.

"Next match please." He sounded a bit self-conscious about his outburst.

I listened to the computer click as it no doubt thought through the possible selections. The clicking eventually slowed to a stop and the competitors were announced.

"Uzumaki Naruto vs. Inuzuka Kiba."

"Yes!" I accidentally throwing my book into the air due to my excitement. I'm pretty sure Kakashi caught it because I never heard it hit the floor. "About damn time!"

I went to jump over the rail in front of me when a hand dropped onto my shoulder, stopping me.

"Naruto, I don't think you're ready for this."

"Oh, come on sensei!"

"He's too strong for you."

"Like hell he is!"

"He is right now. You need to forfeit."

"No."

"Naruto-"

"No. I'm fighting Kiba and there's nothing you can do to stop me." There was a pause in the conversation before he continued.

"We'll see about that."