A/N: Not dead. For once, it was for good news. I had a promotion, so I had to change work location and move and it's been hectic. Plus, I started my masters part-time at night. SO, I'm all over the place, aha.
But I'm alive.
P.E Teacher
Chapter 4
This was ridiculous.
And yet she was doing it.
Kagome wrapped her fingers around Kirara's soft beige fur, insuring her own safety. Kirara was usually always mindful of the riders on her back, but Kagome had experienced a few falls during her time in the feudal era. She tried to scan the ground, hoping to spot the youkai she was seeking. It was insane, and she should not be doing this but she was. Kouga's - future Kouga - words had stayed with her and she was unable to convince herself that the pressure in her chest was nothing. She had a bad feeling about what he might do and she attempting to prevent his future actions. Granted, he had made it long enough to reach her era… but it did not mean that carelessness did not follow him around.
He wanted to protect her. He was risking his own life and the life of his pack for something that could be prevented. He did not have to venture on his own, he did not need to carry around more battle wounds.
They could all work together and fight the evil together.
Of course - that meant getting Inuyasha and Kouga to join forces…
Technically, she was fairly convinced that Kouga would not be too hard to persuade. Yes, he was seeking Naraku on his own to protect her but, he, unlike Inuyasha, had one particular weakness; her. He loved her. She was not going to manipulate his feelings, she was not going to lie to him. However, if she shared her predicaments, and fears with him, his feelings for her might convince him to do the right thing. Granted, he was not like the other Kouga. He would not be calm, he would not keep a distance between them. This Kouga - was a little pushy. But - if he could age and become more mature, he had the potential all along. Perhaps if they actually became friends, they could get to that type of relationship.
Either that, or she was completely delusional and her plan was going to backfire.
The latest option appeared more likely…
But she would put her fate into her optimism.
A meow tore her away from her thoughts. Kagome looked down at Kirara only to see her neko friends staring at a spot in the midst of the forest; Kouga. She petted Kirara's head, watching the neko brush up against her palm. "Thank you Kirara."
Immediately, she began their plunge to the ground, the intensity of the wind forcing Kagome to close her eyes to shield them. Before they even reached the ground, Kouga had already caught whiff of her scent and he was patiently waiting for her. By the time she opened her eyes again, he was standing right in front of her Kirara, his hands on his hips while Ginta and Hakkaku waited behind him, giant grins on their faces. They usually ran after Kagome - it had never happened that it was the other way around. They was not certain if it was a good thing or if they should be concerned that Kagome had sought them out.
Now that she had found him, Kagome did feel a little silly to propose that they team up. It was not a thought he had ever shown any kind of interest in such a proposition. She was only doing this based on the information she had gathered from his future self. Plus, she was more than familiar with his stubbornness and f he was indeed trying to protect her from danger… he would not be easily convinced. But - she was here trying regardless.
"Kouga… I- I'm here to ask you something."
Before she could even blink, he closed the distance between them, his ponytail swinging around his head. "Kagome, you're my woman. Anything ya need, I'll do for ya."
Oh boy. Hopefully he would stick to these words. "Do you want to travel with us?"
Apparently these were the perfect words to speak if she wanted to give him a heart attack. He suddenly fell silent, his body slouching backwards. He was staring straight at her, but he was not saying anything. She did not know if it was from shock or from hesitation.
"Kouga?"
Had she broken him? She had to remember that the Kouga she had gotten close to was not this one. Maybe she had been too familiar with him?
"Travel?" Of all the requests he expected from her - this was not one of them. He had wanted to stay by her side but obligations had torn him away from her. His pack needed him, especially now after everything they had endured. He could not leave them behind with no certainty as to when he would return.
Most of all, she had never offered before… She had often been hesitant in his presence - most of it due to Inuyasha's attitude - but he had been confident that she would eventually see the truth of things and realize he was a much better option than the mutt face. Was this it? Was this the moment when she came to her senses? Granted, she was keeping a distance between them and it did not quite sound like the love declaration he had given her but… it was something.
"Yes," she confirmed. How was she going to explain this to him without giving him any kind of false hopes? It appeared to be an unlikely tast. "You wanted Naraku dead… and so do we." Kagome did not want another person to lose their life in this fight. "Wouldn't it be better if we all took him down together?"
Slowly, he took a step forward. Warm fingers glided across her skin as he captured her fingers with his. His much larger hands covered hers as he met her gaze, a glistening in his blue orbs. "Kagome," he began, seriousness filling his deep voice. "I could never put you in danger like this."
Finding Naraku before she did - it was his way of protecting her. Perhaps Inuyasha did not mind throwing Kagome into danger but Kouga had a different point of view when it came down to her safety. He made it his priority. She was his woman and she was part of his pack; her safety meant everything to him. She knew she was capable of defending herself and the pack, which she had proven during their fight with the birds of paradise. However, that did not mean he wanted her on the frontline. Naraku was not a regular enemy and he did not play by the rules. He focused on weaknesses and in breaking bonds. Kouga refused to underestimate him again. What kind of mate would he be if he was not willing to lay his life down for her?
"Kouga, I don't need to be protected."
No she had always gracefully handled her bow in the past. No, she had not always been familiar with this era, but things had changed. She could do more than before and she could stand on her own two feet.
"I know. I wasn't tryin' to insult ya, Kagome." He squeezed her hands a little tighter. Her attitude and fire were the things that drew him to her in the first place. "I wouldn't be taking care of my woman if I let ya get hurt."
And now Kagome found herself at a crossroad. She refused to encourage his ideas that she was his woman - but she did not want him in harm's ways. She knew that they could have a nice, light relationship - as friends. His future self had shown her that. Of course, she was assuming that it would be possible to do the same now. Maybe there were some events that needed to happen to him so that he could become the person he was in the modern era but… She knew that person was inside Kouga. Despite his constant advances, she could see what kind of person he was. He was kind, he loved his pack and he would die for those he loved.
He could get injured, he could lose more than he had to lose. She knew Ginta and Hakkaku made it… but he probably lost others. She was tired of Naraku stealing from them, taking lives left and right. Also, now that she knew this fight came to an end at some point… there was hope. This could be done. Life was life. Maybe she was supposed to see Kouga in the future - maybe this Kouga and her were always supposed to work together to battle Naraku. Things did not happen randomly. She did not get pulled into the well by mistakes - coincidences had been scarce and far apart. She had to do this.
"Kouga, nothing will happen to me. We'll be stronger as a group."
"I can do this by myself." His honor was on the line. Naraku had stripped him from his pack and he had to retake what had been stolen from him.
"Kouga." She did not know what words to use to convince him, what lines would make him abandon his pride. She refused to play on his feelings, she would not give him false hopes. It would only make the situation more complicated and it would absolutely ruin any chance they might have at traveling as a group. She needed something, anything. "We want the same thing. We should be working together."
She was not pulling away from his grip, and she was not uncomfortable. No, instead she was begging him to join her. Honor demanded that he protected her. His pride demanded that he freed her from danger and died for her if need be. But, but his Kagome was standing in front of him, begging him to come with her. How the fuck was he supposed to say no to that? He said he would fight the hanyou for her, that he would make her see that he was the right choice for her. Would it not be easier to do if he was by her side? Surely, if he was with her - she would see the difference between the two of them and see that he was the superior one…
He bowed his head forward. "Kagome, if this is whatcha want, I'll do anything to make my woman happy."
Alright, not quite the answer she wanted but… "It'll be good for us, all of us - as a group." And now it was back to being uncomfortable.
"We'll be traveling with sis!"
It was a dream come true - that and Kagome's pack did not tornado away at the speed of light like Kouga did. Over were the days when they had to chase after him like their lives depended on it.
Kouga finally released Kagome's hands and stared right ahead into the horizon. Kagome felt relief wash over her - but it was not long live.
"Time to show muttface who's in charge."
Crap.
Before words were out of her mouth, he was already heading in the direction of the forest, leaving a trail of dust behind. "Kouga! You can't fight him!" Great. Now she did not have time to prepare the others - or lay down some ground rules. She should have known this plan was doomed from the beginning. What did she do?
A hand rested upon her shoulder and she nearly jumped out of her skin. "Little sister, he can't hear you."
"He's long gone."
"Didn't think he'd leave sis behind though…"
"Maybe he wants to take care of Inuyasha first."
She needed to get there and fast. "Kirara!"
Hopefully she could make it back in time before they killed each other…
-P-
"Did that just happen?"
Kouga slicked back his bangs with his fingers before leaning into his chair. "Afraid so."
"But - it was not… that ain't how it went down."
"I know."
"Why are you so calm about this?"
"What is happening?"
Kouga sighed. He had hoped he would keep this to himself. He did not think that Kagome's actions would mess up anyone else's memories. But they had. "Kagome."
"What about sis?"
"She's - she's been changing things."
"What do you mean changing things?"
"I mean, since I met her in this … era. Things are different."
Hakkaku frowned. "Ain't time - fixed?"
"I —" He did not know enough about this shit to say if this was normal. He had also believed that what happened - happened. But, Kagome was showing him a different perspective. "I don't know."
"So wait - Naraku dying… The good guy winning…"
"It could all go away?" Ginta finished for him.
"I don't know. Maybe it still happens. I mean - if they could take him down, for sure they can do it with us." He could hardly believe that them being more could ruin it all. Then again - what if they did not get the shards they needed, what if… something important was altered. It was all up in the air.
"You have to tell her."
"I can't."
He knew Kagome. If she knew she had changed things, she would feel guilty and trying to fix what she had done… it might make it worse. She had already changed their timeline. At this point - all they could do was hope for the best.
"But if she keeps doing it…"
"Anything she does from now on is new," Kouga pointed out. "We never traveled with them."
"Yeah, and we're still here right?"
"What do you mean?"
"We still win. Or things would be much different right?"
Hopefully.
-P-
"Kagome would never do that you stupid wolf."
"And I'm tellin' ya she did."
"I'm gonna slice you in half."
Kagome let out a sigh as she closed the distance between her and her friends. At least they were still alive. At this point it was the only good news she could see. "Right here Kirara," she whispered to her neko friends. As close as possible to Inuyasha and Kouga was the best option.
"Inuyasha stop."
Already his sword was out, ready to fulfill the words he had spoken.
"Kagome. Keh!" Finally, she would be able to confirm that the damn wolf had lost his mind. "Tell that mangy wolf he's out of his damn mind."
Oh boy, that would not go well. "Inuyasha, I invited him to join us."
"You did what?"
While the feeling of shock took over Inuyasha's body, his mouth hanging and his heavy sword dropping to the ground, Kouga's chest was swelling with pride. He had a smirk on his face as he crossed his arms in front of his chest; he had told the mutt but he had refused to listen to reason.
This would never work.
"Lady Kagome, you have invited the wolf pack to join us?"
"Why?" Shippo bluntly asked.
"I just - argh. We all want the same thing okay. We all want to kill Naraku. Why aren't we doing it together?" As if that was an explanation that Inuyasha would ever accept.
"Because that stupid wolf wants you," Inuyasha said as he snapped back to reality. "Keh. I get it now. You want the wolf."
This again. "Inuyasha - sit!" No warning, no yelling. She did not want him to put ideas in Kouga's head. He already had an overly active imagination of his own, and she did not need it to derail. She was doing this because it was the right thing to do. "Kouga is our friend. He helped us in the past, and he lost a lot. Naraku is stronger than us. He gets us at every turn, he leads us into his traps… we'll need everyone if we want to finish this." Any time they thought they were one step forward, he showed them that they were two steps back. "Naraku wants to divide us, turn us against each other. He knows we're stronger together. Why are we letting him win?"
How many traps had he set up for them? How many times did he try to fool them into thinking one of them had betrayed the other?
"It's what he does Inuyasha." And then came the argument she could not stomach. "It's what he did to you and Kikyo." She did not like it, but what else was she supposed to say? Betrayal was Naraku's weapon of choice.
Inuyasha was back on his feet, brushing off the dirt from his clothes. At the mention of Kikyo's name, he was forced to stare away from Kagome's face, unable to hold her gaze. "Keh. I can kill that bastard myself." Some of Kagome's arguments were valid - not that he would tell her that. He still did not want to work with that fucking wolf. Kouga's number one priority was to get Kagome and Inuyasha refused to believe this alliance was done purely to stop Naraku. Only Kagome would be foolish enough to believe that.
"Then why haven't you mutt face?"
"Kouga," Kagome warned. Since she could not sit him, it made controlling him a little bit more difficult. "Your taunting is not helping."
"Kagome -"
"We have to work together."
"I agree with Kagome."
Heads turned to look at Sango, and Kagome felt relief build up inside of her. It would be easier if she was not the only one trying to bring forth this alliance. She knew it was unexpected but - but the Kouga from the future had worried her. She did not come here to watch people sacrifice themselves. She wanted to help as many people as she could. He might have made it to the modern era, but it probably came with some costs. Maybe even more members of his pack.
"Why are you all against me?"
Kagome resisted the urge to roll her eyes. "Inuyasha, nobody is against you." There it was; the reason for his rage. Inuyasha felt like he was being replaced. Kagome knew his past had not been easy and he was used to being chased away but it was not what they were doing. "I told you I'd stay by your side, and I will."
She made that promise back when she knew Inuyasha's feelings for Kikyo. She knew she would fight for him to live, she would fight to stay by his side and to show him that all the pain he had endured was over. She did that knowing that in the end, his heart belonged to someone else. Nothing would change the promise that she made. Nothing would make her go back on her word. She was not inviting Kouga to hurt him, she was not doing any of this to punish him.
"Keh, I don't care about that. You can leave for all I care."
Kagome's hands fisted at her side and she took a deep breath in a foolish attempt to hold herself back from speaking the one little word that would send him flying into the ground. He was trying to get to her, he was trying to push her away because it was what he did. Whenever Inuyasha got hurt, he lashed out.
"Listen," she began through gritted teeth. "Whenever Kikyo shows up, you go see her and I don't say anything. I'm not putting anything on hold, I'm not stopping our fight."
"Oi, I don't -"
"Sit!"
And thud.
"I'm not done," she said as she took a step forward in his direction. Dirt covered his long silver hair as his face was still lodged into the ground. "I'm not asking you to like Kouga, I'm not asking you to be his friends. But they are going to travel with us."
"Listen wench," he began as he tore his face away from the mud.
"Sit."
And again.
"Sit, sit, sit, sit."
Everyone made sure to keep a distance, not wanting to further aggravated Kagome. Her hair was forming a curtain around her face, her fists were tugging at the green fabric of her skirt and her blue eyes were shining with a red rage. She was trying to do this calmly, she had even given him a chance. This was no time for stubbornness. They could not possibly waste a day doing this.
"Why you."
"Inuyasha, Kouga and his pack are traveling with us and that's that. Find a way to like it." She crossed her arms in front of her chest, before huffing and looking away from him. Her heart was hammering in her chest, a trail of sweat beads traveling down her spine as she tried to keep her prideful demeanour. He had not wanted Sango, Miroku or Shippo to travel with them and they had. It had turned out just fine. He needed to step on his ego and realize that this was the best plan. She knew he was not used to inviting strangers in his life and that he did not trust many people but… that had to change. Things were different now and he was no longer a little kid all by himself. He had people who cared for him. He had her.
"Or you can find yourself another jewel detector."
Inuyasha put his hands flat on the ground and finally managed to dig himself out of the hole. She had buried him deep this time. She really wanted the wolf to be with them and he did not like it. Why did she care so much about that mangy wolf?
"Keh, woman. Do what you want."
It was the only words he spoke to her before turning around, allowing her to face his back.
"Inuyasha…"
But her words fell on deaf ears. Inuyasha slowly walked away from her, his hair swaying with the wind as he took firm steps in direction of the forest. This was what he did. Whenever he felt betrayed, he isolated himself. Kagome had brought this up upon him and she would have to be careful. If Inuyasha felt left out… she did not want him to lash out or make stupid decisions. Nothing about the core of their group was being shaken up and destroyed. He needed it to understand that it was okay to include others.
But she would have to watch herself and make sure… neither of them got the wrong idea about what was happening here. What had she gotten herself into?
"Kagome?"
She sighed before giving Sango her attention. "Yeah?"
"How do you plan on explaining to Kouga when you… go home?"
Ah crap.
-P-
A happy family.
Sango, Miroku, Shippo and Kagome were all sitting around the fire, some ramen boiling on top of the fire. Inuyasha had wait to return from his little walk and Kagome was beginning to worry. How mad at her was he? She knew that Kouga and Inuyasha often argued but she figured most of it was for show and pride. Deep down, there was a twisted friendship between the two of them. Now she was not as sure as before. She had not thought this through. Although her concern might not be warranted; he might simply be with Kikyo. He was honest with her, he bore his heart out and he told her everything, even when he should not…
Suddenly the sound of a branch cracking brought her out of her thoughts, forcing her to look up. Except the figure she saw did not belong to Inuyasha.
Kouga's face appeared from the shadows and Ginta and Hakkaku followed closely behind. "I brought dinner," he said with a smirk.
This was his chance at stealing Kagome away and he was not about to let it go to waste. He would prove to her that he was superior to Inuyasha in every way possible. That started with providing her with a decent meal, something Inuyasha clearly was not interested in doing. Kouga was not happy about traveling with the stinking dog, but he did it - for her. Inuyasha was not youkai enough to return the same courtesy. Hopefully Kagome would be able to see the difference between the two of them.
Kouga pulled fishes from behind his back before throwing them in front of the fire.
In the past, Kagome might have had a reaction to raw fish being thrown in front of her but that was no longer a thing. She was used to the cruder ways of the feudal era. Shippo was already on it as he hopped from the tree log where they had been sitting and retrieved one of his sticks. He poked the fishes through and give the brochette of fish to Kagome. She put it to cook on the fire and sat back down.
Cooking the fishes? Humans were weird. Kouga himself would have eaten it raw, but if that was how his woman ate, he would go with it.
"What is sis doing to the fish?" Ginta whispered.
"I- I think she's cooking it…" Hakkaku replied in the same hushed voice.
"Shut it you two," Kouga warned. "Where's muttface?"
Kagome's eyes narrowed. "Kouga, don't call him that." She sighed. "He's not back yet."
"I'm sure he's fine Lady Kagome."
"I think I'll go look for him." She knew he was mad at her right now and she was probably the last person he wanted to see but… maybe if they could talk one on one instead of in front of the whole group… he might just understand.
"I'll come with ya."
"Kouga - please. Let's not make things worse." She knew he had done nothing wrong and she was the one who had invited him to join their group but… but if she showed up with Kouga that would not help the situation at all.
He wanted to argue, he wanted to point out that the woods could be a dangerous place in the night but - but he said nothing. Instead he nodded. Now, it did not mean that he would actually listen to his woman, but he would act so though he would.
"I'll be right back," Kagome said as she grabbed her bow and arrows from the ground; just in case.
She took slow, quiet steps as she headed into the depth of the forest. Inuyasha could not have gone far; no matter how mad he was, she knew he would not abandon the group. He would stay within earshot in the eventuality that they came under attack. But, it did not mean that finding him would be easy; he could be anywhere, including up in the trees. Wherever he was, he did not want to be found. She tried to see, the moonlight being her only guidance. She popped her lips as her shoulders crouched with resignation. As Kagome stared down at the ground, a bright white light attracted her attention. Her heart stopped, her blood froze and she forced herself to swallow as it dawned upon her. She knew what she would see once she raised her head; Kikyo's soul collectors.
Now she knew where to find him.
She knew he was safe. Or as safe as he could be with Kikyo.
Kagome found out what she needed to know. Now it was the time to walk away. Yet, her body did not listen to her; instead of walking back to camp, she was following the soul collectors. She took slow steps at first but then she picked up her pace. Her heart was racing, her blood pulsing as tears began to poodle in her eyes; why did she do this to herself? She did not have a chance to answer her own question that she was graced with a familiar sight; Inuyasha and Kikyo. Her heart sunk and she finally came to a halt. He was with her. He was in pain and he went to her because - because she was the woman he loved.
It did not matter how many adventures and struggles they had; his heart would always belong to her. She knew that, she always did. But - she was unable to shut off her feelings for him. She felt a tear escape her, slid down her cheeks. It felt warm against the cold air of the night and she wrapped her arms around herself. She had to go. Her lips were parted, her eyes red from the tears as she turned around - to come face to face with Kouga.
He was a few steps away from her, his blue eyes shinning in the night. His stance was defensive as his glance went from her face to the scene behind her. There was nothing she could or say to explain, to hide it. She was bare in front of him and she felt a ping of pain in her heart. She did not want anyone to see this side of her. Especially not Kouga. He was nice - but he was hotheaded. She did not need him to create a scene, she did not want him to start a fight with Inuyasha, or use this in one of his love speech.
Now was not the time for it.
"K-kouga." Her voice was failing her.
That was mutt face - he was sure of it. For a second, he thought the woman by his side was Kagome, but it was not. No, his Kagome was standing in front of him, tears staining her face. He could feel his blood pumping, his fists itching to bury themselves in Inuyasha's face. How could he do this to her? How could he fend him off all the time, and yet chose another over Kagome? And Kagome? She knew. He could tell from the pain in her eyes. This was not unexpected. Why did she stay with that mutt face? Why did she defend him? He wanted to launch himself at Inuyasha and teach him a lesson…
But Kagome was there.
Saying his name. Silently begging him.
He leaned forward, ready to ignore her pleas, ready to restore her honor and protect her heart.
"Please."
His body was tense, his muscles were pulsing and Kagome swallowed before taking a step forward. She did not want a fight, she did not want someone to protect her. She had gotten herself in this situation.
Surprisingly… he listened.
Despite every inch of him telling him to go after Inuyasha, to beat him to a pulp, he stayed where he stood and offered her the smallest nod. It broke his heart. It was not just about Kagome's honor, it was about her heart. She was his woman, and she should never cry like this. He wanted to hold her, he wanted to wipe away her tears… but he did not. She walked past him, holding back a sob, her arms swinging by her side. Her hand came close to his as she walked by, and he let himself fall, he reached out, his fingers brushing up against hers. Nothing less, nothing more. And then she was gone, leaving a feeling of emptiness.
Kouga dared to throw a glance in direction of Inuyasha and his woman, cursing him. He did not deserve Kagome. He always knew this, but this event confirmed it. He would not let Inuyasha have her. He would hold back who he was, he would go against every fiber of his body of he had to, but he would not let Inuyasha have her. She deserved so much better - she deserved someone who loved her and only her. He managed to tear his eyes away from the awful scene, and he re-focused his attention to Kagome. She was a nothing more than a shadow in the darkness now. He would wait. He would give her a moment before he joined her at the camp.
By the time Kagome made it to camp, she had dried her eyes as best she could, but she did not know how much of it she could fake. Once her friends came in view, they watched her come in with smiles on their faces. "Kagome, did you find Inuyasha?"
"I did. Hm, Sango. Can I borrow Kirara?"
"Is everything okay?"
"I - I forgot something home. I'll come back early tomorrow." She needed the night. Just a night away to compose herself and then she would be all better and everything would be back the way it was.
"Sure." Sango did not believe a word Kagome had spoken… but she knew the real reason why she had to go home. Inuyasha.
"Home? Sis where do you live?"
"It's far." It was not an answer and she knew it would come with more questions, but she could not handle it. "Thank you Sango."
She wanted to leave, she wanted to get out before Kouga came back to camp. He would look at her with those eyes - or he might try to right some wrongs… and she could not handle it. Not tonight. She hopped on Kirara and allowed the wind to dry away her tears.
She could do this.
She chose to do this.
She would stay by his side.
-P-
