DRAG ME UNDER

TOBIAS

She woke up several times during the night, though most of the time she was so out of it, she fell back to sleep almost immediately. Tobias had brought her back to his apartment, after she had passed out on him, worried that she would try to escape again if he left her at the hospital. He understood her fear clearly; it would be terrifying waking up to a sterile room with white walls and nothing but sick people all around. She wouldn't get better there, she would only get worse.

Tobias observed her from afar; she looked so peaceful when she slept. Her face radiated with beauty and it showed no signs of the physical—and emotional—pain she had been through. Her face had grown red with colour, a relief in his eyes. She was pale as a corpse when he had first brought her to the hospital. On the way, trudging through mud and walking endlessly down the tiresome road, he had that nagging worry that he had been too late. But he hadn't... The doctors had said, if he had been any later, she would've been dead. Gone.

There was nothing worse than that thought: her being gone. There was this simplicity about her—life was brighter when she was near. Strange as that would be for two people who just barely met, and had gotten off on the rockiest of starts. He felt at ease when he would see her chest rising and falling evenly, a clear sign she was still breathing—still here. The longer he found himself looking at her, the more his anguish and concern would slip.

He made himself comfortable on the wooden chair that he had brought into the bedroom. He didn't want to risk anything by climbing into bed with her. God knows what kind of reaction he would get from that. He nodded off to sleep, mind at peace knowing she was safe.

"Safe." He repeated in his sleep, content with how it sounded.

He woke up to the sudden ruffling of sheets. His head shot up at the sound and his eyes snapped open to find the ghost of a figure darting out the bedroom door. His immediate reaction was to jerk upright and he was on his feet in no time. One glance at the empty bed told him all, she was trying to run again.

"Shit." He swore at himself. How did he think that taking her back to his apartment was a good idea?

You should've left her at the hospital. You should've let the professionals take care of her. The voice was back. She would've been better without you.

"She wouldn't—" His lip quivered. He didn't sound as confident as he had hoped in his mind. "She would've run away again." He concluded.

Sure. But look at what just happened? Don't you see? Taking her back here was not a good idea. Think about how she would've seen it? Waking up to a stranger in an unfamiliar room? Wouldn't that remind her of something?

Then everything clicked. He hated how long it took for him to have realized that. Of course she was going to bolt as soon as she got the possibility. She was terrified of men, terrified of being alone in the same room with them. "I'm such an idiot!" He yelled before running after her.

He didn't have to run far. Part way through his living room, he found her there, crutched on the floor, her body shaking dangerously as she rocked herself back and forth. As he crept closer to her, a pang of anger flashed across his face. She looked so scared, so innocent—how could someone do this to her? She was too young… Too young to have been put through all of that. It just wasn't fair.

He crouched down beside her, careful not to make any sudden movements that could scare her. "Hey." After he spoke, he realized how the whole situation looked familiar; it was the exact repeat as yesterday. He vowed to make a change this time, to help her somehow. He didn't know how, but he knew he had to do something.

Or she would be forever terrified of him.

She simply shook her head, "Please just let me go." Her voice was quiet, and her body shook even more.

A sad smile found its way to his lips, and he found himself speaking without thought. "I know it may be hard but please—please just let me help." His eyes were begging, "I want to help you." He put his arms up, an innocent attempt to show he was harmless. She glanced at him warily before she looked away. His shoulders sagged as he repeated. "I just want to help you."

She shuffled backwards, "No. You don't." She stated, "No one wants to help me. No one wanted to." She looked at him now, straight in the eye. "No one can."

He swallowed the uncomfortable lump caught in his throat. "That's not true." He remarked, "I know you're not beyond help. I know that despite what you say, you want to be saved. I know… because I was once like you." His voice was barely audible now, and he found his own hands were shaking with fear now. "I was in a place where I thought I couldn't be saved either…"

Her next words caught him by surprise, "Who saved you then."

He chewed down on his lip, turned his head away and spoke. "No one." He turned back to her, "I saved myself."

She didn't bother answering him, but he knew he had made some progress with her. His insides leapt with joy, though his stomach churned with nausea at the memory he had just brought up. He hated talking about it. In fact, he had blocked that from his mind. The fact that he had shared it with her was a shock to him. As much as he wanted to say that he was helping her—she was helping him too.

His heart sped up a little at that.

"I know how hard it is to accept help… But you need it. I know you do. So please… Please just let me help you. Everything will be okay. I won't hurt you. I promise." His voice was fierce though there was something clumsy about the way he spoke.

She eyed him up at down, "How can I trust you?" She asked uncertainly.

"You just can. You just have to admit to yourself that you can. Because deep down you know you can." His hand gestured to his own heart. He then reached out, hand open and waiting for her.

She looked at it nervously before nodding. "Okay."

He felt relief wash over him. It was s shaky step, but it was a step nonetheless. She was beginning to trust him. He tried hard to hide the big grin that wanted to come out. "I'm Tobias." He introduced.

"Tris." She answered slowly, hand shaking in his.

She didn't say anymore for the day. She spent majority of the time in the bedroom, by herself. There was no verbal improvement after their last conversation, but each time he came to check on her, she wouldn't shy away from him as much. Occasionally she would still shift uncomfortably when he tried to make small talk, but at least she didn't run away. She offered simple answers such as a nod or a shake of the head, but still no words.

Tobias sighed as he resigned to the couch for the day. It was only noon and yet he was already so exhausted. He sauntered over to the couch and collapsed on top of it. With a heavy exhale he sunk into the comfort the chair had to offer. Only now did he feel how sore his shoulders were, and how his head was now throbbing. He barely had any sleep the past week, and it was way before Tris entered the picture. He always had a hard time falling asleep, and the troubles that now plagued his mind no longer allowed to get an ounce of rest.

She won't thank you.

His small smile from before turned into a frown. "Why can't you just leave me alone!" He cried.

She hates you. She hates all men—as she should.

"I'm not like them!" He growled, thinking of them made his insides boil with rage. He was fuming inside at the thought of them with their hands on her. "I will never be like them."

She doesn't think so. She thinks you're keeping her here. Like a prisoner… Like how they did to her. Don't you get it? She's miserable here… Sooner of later she'll run away again… You'll drive her right back into their arms.

"Just shut up!" He hollered, hands now fisted into balls by his side. "I won't let her go back. I'll protect her." He declared, "I'll protect her always."

You can try, but you won't be able to protect her from them. They're everywhere—they have eyes everywhere. They'll see you long before you can even get close. They're dangerous, they're deadly and they're coming for her… And now you.

He slammed his hands down on the chair. "Why won't you just leave me alone!"

Then there was silence. The voice inside his head was gone, but its words were forever there. Lingering in the back of his mind. It was true, as much as Tobias hated to admit it, he couldn't protect her. If they had as much power as it had said, then there was nothing he could do to stop what was coming. "No. I will protect her." It was soft, but the more he repeated it, the louder his voice grew. "I will protect her." He paused, "I have to."

His eyes naturally found it's way to the bedroom door, where he knew she would be. He groaned, as he got up from his relaxed position, angry at how his own thoughts had manipulated him.

"Tris?" He knocked as he called out to her.

There was no response.

Slowly, he inched the door open. To his surprise, he found her on the bed sitting cross-legged, wide-awake as opposed to sleeping, his assumed guess. Her head moved up to greet him, but she didn't speak. She gave a nod of acknowledgment then went back to reading her book.

Reassurance washed over him. "She's safe."

For now.

He shook off the bad vibe the voice gave, but it didn't hide the shiver than ran down his spine. Immediately, he felt sick, anxious. Distracting himself, he let his eyes wander from her sitting figure to his bookshelf where he had found one missing slot. A smile crept on his face as he moved closer. "What are you reading?"

"Alice in Wonderland." His jaw dropped a little. Had she just spoken to him? And not about death or pain?

His mouth was moving fast though no words came out. She was watching him, and as if pressured to say something, he quickly blurted out words hoping it formed a coherent sentence. "Is it good?"

She tilted her head and looked at him quizzically. The corner of her lip turned into what he hoped was a smile, though it faded as soon as it came. She nodded in response to his question.

She didn't flinch as he moved closer, so he took it as a welcoming gesture. He sat down on the bottom corner of the bed, the one closest to the door. Her attention had returned to the book, though once in a while, he could see her eyes twitch, watching him. She was still careful, weary of trusting anyone. At least, she let him sit near her—it was a baby step. But it was progress nonetheless.

They sat in dead silence. The grandfather clock chimed from the hallway and the winds howled outside. She had buried herself deep beneath the duvet, in a cocoon of blankets and pillows. He watched her, observing her with a small smile on his lips. It was nice to see her like this; she looked like a normal teenager. For someone who had been through what she had, she was doing remarkably well in remaining calm, though he suspected it was more for show than anything. She did seem slightly nervous; though all those funny vibes faded the longer he sat with her. Once an hour or so, her hands would twitch anxiously or her body would shiver. He had to stop himself from touching her; the thought of holding her tight and promising that no harm would ever come to her was very tempting. He had to use every bit of self-control he had left to stop himself from jeopardizing what little progress they had made.

Sometime during the long hours they spent in the room, he had gotten up to grab his own book to read. So they sat, side by side—but not close enough to be touching, he was very vigilant about that—reading. Time passed by quickly this way, and it was a long time before any of them spoke again.

To his surprise though, it was Tris that broke the silence. He was so immersed in his own book that he hadn't realized that she had stopped reading and was now taking her time to look him over. "Could you—" Her voice wavered and she stopped, biting her bottom lip, unsure of whether to ask the question.

"Hmm?" He murmured, placing the book down in his lap, spine facing upwards.

His hum of approval gave her the go-ahead to continue. "I was wondering if you could—could you read to me?" The book was dangling in her tiny hands and he reached over, taking it from her grasp, taking extra care as to not touch her whilst doing so.

With the book in his own hands now, and Tris safely under the duvet, Tobias looked at her, a genuine smile on his face, and said: "Of course I will, Tris."


A/N: Forgot to mention this at the start, but Tris is around 16 and Tobias is 19/20 here. Oh and thanks to everyone who's read and supported me so far...1,000 views already that is incredible! Hope you all enjoyed reading this as always, and don't forget to eave your thoughts down below, would love to read them. See you next time :) xx