AN: Thanks for reading and for your kind reviews. I guess this 'light' story got a little heavy. Sorry about that. I couldn't help it with these two. Here's the final chapter!

EOEOEOEOEO

Olivia braced her arms against the counter and looked in the bathroom mirror. She had managed not to break down in Elliot's arms, but that was only because he'd felt her shiver in the cold winter air and had broken his embrace to rush her inside.

When they'd arrived in his apartment, she had excused herself quickly, and locked herself in the bathroom, trying to get her emotions under control. If she didn't, she wasn't sure what was going to happen.

Olivia turned on the water, and let it run over her hands until it turned warm. She looked at her reflection, taking in the lipstick smudges and smeared eyeliner. She was a mess. Gathering warm water in her cupped hands, she leaned over and splashed her face with water, trying to clean up the remnants. She only managed to make it worse, so she found a washcloth to finish the job. When her face was clear of make-up, she focused on her clothes. She wanted the stupid dress off…the carefully selected bra and panties gone…and a moment later, they were piled on the floor.

When she was stripped bare, she looked back at her reflection. Looking for what, she didn't know. Strength? Resolve? Answers to questions unasked?

She had none.

I'm just glad you're here.

Elliot's words came unbidden, and she thought about the tone of his voice, the warmth of his breath against her skin, the solid wall of his body as he pressed her close, and the feeling of belonging and safety…of being right where she was supposed to be.

She wondered if Elliot knew…really knew…how his words and actions impacted her. She didn't think so. He had been scared something had happened to her…that she was hurt. He was concerned about her as a woman…as his partner…as his friend.

Olivia knew she had to stop reading into every little thing he said and did.

Do you really think a few nights in his apartment and a few flirty comments meant things had changed?

For what seemed like the millionth time, she had to remind herself that he'd had years to say something to her…to change things between them. The fact that he hadn't said a thing when she'd gone out tonight was proof enough.

A knock on the door startled her.

"Liv? Is everything ok in there?"

Olivia looked around for something to cover herself; she could just imagine if Elliot barged in and caught her standing there naked.

"Liv?" He rattled the door handle, testing to see if it was locked.

"I'm fine." She said quickly. She knew she hadn't locked the door. "Don't come in." She grabbed a towel off the rack and wrapped it around herself, making sure she was covered.

"Olivia." Elliot said sternly. "You've been in there for half an hour." He leaned on the door, wanting nothing more than to barge in there and make sure she was okay. Ever since he'd opened the door to the cab, she'd been off. He'd seen the look on her face and felt the way she'd trembled in his arms. The moment they had walked over the threshold of his apartment, she'd bolted for the bathroom. He rattled the knob again. He raised his voice slightly. "Olivia."

Olivia wrenched open the door, and immediately stepped back as Elliot stumbled into the room towards her. He pushed into her, causing her to fall back against the vanity and lose hold of her towel. Olivia gasped as Elliot grabbed the edge of the counter to keep himself from falling on her completely, and Olivia was able to grab the towel again to keep it from falling as Elliot stepped back.

Elliot saw her standing there…her face clean and the front of her hair damp…clutching a towel around her body. The towel barely covered her, and his eyes swept over her. But it wasn't sexual; he was looking for telltale signs…bruises or cuts or both.

Olivia didn't know that, and she straightened up, clearly pissed off. "Did you get a good look? Or would you like me to drop the towel?" She pushed past him and went across the hall to his bedroom, intent on getting dressed. She was so done with this night.

"Liv…I wasn't…" Elliot followed her into the bedroom. "I was looking to make sure you weren't hurt."

Olivia whirled around. She was emotionally drained, and she couldn't handle him right now. Anger was the only tool left in her arsenal. "I told you that I was fine." She snapped. "Why don't you believe me?"

"Because I know you. I know when something's wrong."

Olivia let out a sound of exasperation. "I don't know what else I say to make you believe me. But it doesn't matter. I can take care of myself." She grabbed a pair of leggings and a t-shirt from her duffle.

"So, you're mad that I care about what happens to you? That doesn't make any sense." Elliot tried to keep his frustration out of his voice but failed.

Olivia's anger fizzled, and she just felt exhausted. "I can't argue with you about this right now." She said tiredly. "I just want to put some clothes on and get some sleep." She watched Elliot's face, knowing he was trying to decide how far to push her. In the moment that she saw he was going to leave it be, she took mercy on him. She leaned towards him slightly and softened her expression. "Ben would never do anything to hurt me." She said firmly. "Trust me."

"OK." Elliot said.

Olivia nodded towards the clothes in her hand. "Can I get dressed now?"

Elliot left his bedroom, still feeling slightly unsettled. He walked into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water. He took a long drink and leaned against the counter. He knew something had happened tonight and he had a sudden realization that maybe he'd gotten it all wrong. Maybe Olivia and Ben had gotten into an argument…or maybe Ben had broken things off with her.

Still…

Elliot had seen Olivia go through dozens of other breakups and she'd never been that upset before. In fact, she'd never seemed upset at all.

He heard the bedroom door open, and Olivia emerged. She was pulling a gray sweatshirt on over her t-shirt and she stopped when she saw him standing there. In less than 5 seconds, she veered into the living room, and grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch.

Elliot followed her. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to sleep." Olivia sat down on the edge of the couch and spread out the blanket.

"I thought maybe we'd stay up for a while. Watch TV or a movie. Or talk."

"I just want to sleep." Olivia said. She was slightly annoyed because she thought she'd made it pretty clear just a few minutes earlier. She saw the look on Elliot's face, and he clearly meant to try to persuade her into doing as he planned, so she shut him down before he could say anything. "Good night Elliot."

With that, she lay down, fluffing the pillow under her head, and pulled the blankets up to her shoulders. For good measure, she turned so her back was to him, hoping he got the message.

Elliot stood there for at least a minute, still distracted by her strange behavior. When it was clear she wasn't even going to turn around to tell him to leave her alone, he let out a heavy sigh, and headed towards his bedroom.

EOEOEOEOEO

Elliot let out a sigh of frustration as he flopped on his back. He'd been lying in bed, tossing and turning, for the last hour, but sleep eluded him. He couldn't get Olivia off his mind. He ran over everything that had happened over the course of the evening…even at the precinct earlier in the day. Olivia had seemed fine, even though things were a little awkward when she left for her night out with Ben.

When he thought about her being out with Ben, he had to force himself to think about something else. He remembered the way Olivia had started yelling at the ref during the Rangers game…which led him to think about everything that had happened since Olivia had arrived at his apartment on Monday night. It had been great having her at his place. It had let him see another side of her, when he thought he knew everything about her.

His mind wandered to the teasing…the innuendo. It had gone farther than they'd ever taken things before. But it had been harmless. Fun.

He wondered if he'd taken it too far.

But then he remembered the lines she'd thrown back at him. She was giving as good as she was getting. She was enjoying their little game.

And so was he.

Her date tonight had really thrown him off. He really had wanted her to stay. He remembered the way the words nearly tumbled from his mouth.

He'd had this overwhelming need to have her here…with him. Where she belonged.

Elliot sat up in bed…a new realization dawning. An epiphany that seemed so apparent now.

Maybe nothing had really happened to Olivia tonight, just as she'd said. Maybe she'd been upset because of him. Because he hadn't asked her to stay.

Could that be it?

Could he really be that lucky?

Or was it all in his imagination? A manifestation of what he hoped to be true?

He closed his eyes, trying to remember everything she'd said. Her mannerisms and facial expressions. He'd been so wrapped up in his own emotion, he had missed all the signs…the non-verbal cues.

He remembered the way she had hesitated right before she walked out the door, when she'd told him not to wait up.

He should have stopped her then and there. He should have shared the thoughts that had been running through his mind that week. He should have told her how she occupied his heart and his mind…and had for years.

Consequences be damned.

So much time had been wasted.

No more.

Elliot scrambled out of bed and fished around for a pair of sweats. He tugged them on, almost falling over in his haste to get dressed. He grabbed a t-shirt that was sitting on top of the dresser and pulled it over his head. He rushed towards the door, his common sense catching up with his emotion.

He couldn't go out to her and declare his undying love. Two quick departures had taught him that Olivia's first inclination was to run when things got too "real".

No. He had to give her the opportunity to make the first move. Somehow, he had to let her know that he was open to hearing what was on her mind…and in her heart.

Elliot opened the bedroom door, and paused, listening for any sound. There was a dim light in the kitchen, but it wasn't bright enough to pierce the darkness in the living room. He walked out as quietly as he could, undecided about whether or not to wake her.

He had an overwhelming need for this to happen tonight. Mostly because he was afraid that things would look different in the light of day. That he would lose his nerve.

Fear had been what had kept these truths from coming out all these years.

"Couldn't sleep?"

Elliot heard Olivia whisper in the dark.

Olivia could see Elliot's profile…but his face was hidden in darkness.

"No. Not really." His voice was husky from disuse, and he cleared his throat. "You?"

"Not really." Olivia said, her voice still a whisper.

Elliot walked into the darkened room and sat down in the chair opposite the couch. "Well…maybe we can not sleep together." He hadn't intended the double entendre, but he heard it as soon as the words were out of his mouth.

"Aren't we already doing that?" Olivia said. She sat up and scooted back into the corner of the couch. She curled her legs beneath her and pulled the blanket back over her lap. She could feel goosebumps on her arms from the cooler night air, and she shivered slightly, wishing she hadn't discarded her sweatshirt.

Elliot was surprised by her answer, but relieved. It cut the tension in the air that had been left from earlier. "I guess technically, that's true."

Olivia couldn't see his face and a part of her didn't like the fact that she couldn't read his expression or see his eyes. She could always tell gauge his emotion by looking into those crystal blues.

The other part of her welcomed the dark. Elliot wouldn't be able to read her either, and somehow the dark made her feel braver. "Technically? What does that mean?"

Elliot pressed his lips together, trying to decide how to answer her question. No quick quip came to him, and there was no way he was going to say what had entered his mind as soon as the subject of sleeping together…or not sleeping together…was out there.

"Have you ever thought about it?"

Elliot almost choked on his own breath when he heard the words float across the room, and he heard the tremor in her voice. She had obviously read what was on his mind…or had assumed from his lack of response. This time, he didn't hesitate. She had given him a gift by bringing it up first, and he didn't want her to regret it. "Yes." He rasped out.

He hoped she didn't think he was an asshole…for thinking about it and for admitting it.

"Oh." She said, the sound light and breathy. He realized she hadn't expected him to answer her…or hadn't expected honesty.

Olivia didn't know what to do with his response. Alex had always told her not to ask a question you didn't already know the answer to…but Elliot's confirmation practically knocked the wind out of her.

"What about you?" Elliot asked, feeling brazen by her question. "You ever think about it?" He felt like a teenaged boy, trying to navigate through the first time he spoke to a girl he liked, couching everything in vague terms. "About us sleeping together?"

Olivia felt her cheeks redden. She ducked her head slightly, even though there was no way Elliot could see her. She hesitated for a second, considering her answer. But Elliot had been honest with her, she owed him the truth. "Yes."

Elliot felt his heart skip a beat…grateful to hear that the desire was mutual.

But she'd had enough men…and probably a few women…lust after her to last a lifetime. "Liv…I don't want you to think…"

Olivia cut him off. "I think it's just natural. We're both adults. We're together all the time…"

Elliot realized she was backtracking…protecting herself in case he was going to qualify his words. "Stop it." He said softly.

Olivia heard something in his voice…in the way he uttered the words…that made her pause.

Elliot listened to the silence…to Olivia's soft breathes. For whatever reason, she was trusting him, and he was immensely grateful. He paused, wanting to move slowly. Admitting to some lust induced fantasies was one thing, but this was so much more than that. "You know it's more than that."

A full minute had passed, and Olivia still hadn't said anything. But there was no going back now. "Olivia." The darkness still dictated whispers. "Tell me that you know."

"El…"

He could tell by the tone of her voice that she was about to deny him; that the honest communication they were having was about to end…before it really even got started. "Don't…please. Just talk to me."

"What do you want me to say? That I know there's more to us than we've both been willing to admit?" Olivia paused a bit, mustering up her courage. "Of course I know that. But there's a reason neither one of us has been willing to say it. To do anything about it." She couldn't believe she had finally said it; it was all out in the open now.

Elliot had his own ideas about the reasons why, but he wanted to hear hers. She was talking, and he wanted to get it all out in the open. "Why is that? What's the reason?"

Olivia thought about his question, and she knew she had misspoken. There wasn't one reason. There were several. Their relationship over the past 8 years had taken several twists and turns, a constant pulling and pushing as they became more dependent on each other. They used words like complicated, but that barely scratched the surface. There had never been a time, except maybe earlier in their partnership, where it seemed a clear choice could be made without a lot of pain. "Because this is bigger than just us." She looked at him, hoping he understood. "You know how this would end…"

"We're talking about you and me. How is this bigger than that?" he challenged, hearing wariness and defeat in her voice. He felt bold in the darkness, but it still bothered him that he couldn't see her face.

Olivia closed her eyes. Part of her wanted him to just leave it alone…to just drop it. But there was another part of her that wanted him to keep pushing her…to have this conversation that should have happened a long time ago. She heard movement, and she opened her eyes. She saw Elliot's shadowy figure moving closer and then he was sitting on the coffee table in front of her. She still couldn't see his features clearly, but intensity was wafting off him in waves.

"How does this end?" Elliot urged.

Olivia took a deep breath, trying to keep tears from welling up. "If we…" She searched for the right words. "If we become us…" her voice trailed off. "What about Kathy…your kids…Cragen…our squad..." She paused. "What would they think? What would they say?"

"Do you really think they'd be surprised?" Elliot said softly.

Olivia didn't respond to his question. "It would be the end of our partnership."

"Why do you think of it as the end?" Elliot leaned forward slightly. "It's just the beginning. He stopped, thinking back to the years they'd been together. No." He corrected himself. "It's not a new beginning for us. It's just a new chapter in our lives together. We don't have to deny how we feel about each other anymore. It's something that should have happened a long time ago."

Olivia heard an earnestness in his voice. A hopefulness…and he clearly wasn't done.

"This week, when you were here, it just felt so…so…right." He struggled choosing the right words to convey just how strongly he felt about it. "I found myself wondering why we hadn't spent more time together outside of work. Remember? I even asked you about it. Because when you were sitting here on my couch and we were talking…when we watched the game and you started yelling at the ref…I was just so damned happy. You joked about me getting tired of you, and I wanted to tell you that there was no way that was ever going to happen. When I saw you tucked under the covers in my bed, I wished that I could wake up and see you there every morning." He paused for a second and took a deep breath. "You belong here…with me. When you're here, this apartment feels like…it feels like. Home." Elliot reached out for her, and found her hands clasped in her lap. He wrapped his hands around hers. "Liv…I realized that I don't want to be partners anymore. I want more…and I'm just really sorry that it took me so damned long to get my head out of my ass and tell you that."

Elliot took a deep breath. It was out there now…he only hoped Olivia wouldn't push him away…that she would be as honest with him as he had been with her.

Olivia was dumbfounded by Elliot's admission. He had told her more in the past few minutes than he'd said the entire time she'd known him. They had been through so much. There had been so many times when their feelings had overwhelmed them…when they had been on the brink, and then retreated.

Elliot knew he'd probably surprised the hell out of her. He had surprised himself. He had always thought, that if they ever got to this place, that it would be Olivia that would make the first admission.

Suddenly, he had to see her face. He had no idea what was going through her mind right now. He let go of her hands, and he stood up slightly and reached past her. He turned on the small table lamp next to her. Even though it was on it's lowest setting, the light seemed harsh in the room, and he saw her turn her head away.

Elliot sat back down, and Olivia's turned back towards him…her eyes connecting with his.

He wanted to tell her to say something…anything…but he kept silent. This had to be on her terms, and he couldn't push her.

"El…" Olivia said his name…buying time while she sorted through all the things she wanted to say. She pressed her lips together, thinking of all the ways this could ruin them. "I'm scared." She whispered.

Elliot took her hands in his again. "I know."

Olivia's eyes moved back and forth between his, and she saw the way he was looking at her. With such tenderness…such hope…and her fear dissipated. "I love you." She saw the surprise on his face, and she pulled her right hand from his and lay her palm lightly against his cheek. "I love you Elliot. I have for a long time."

Elliot placed his palm over hers, and broke into a grin. He had never been so happy to hear those words before.

Maybe because he never thought he'd heard them uttered by the astonishing woman sitting in front of him now.

"That's perfect, because I am madly, deeply, head over heels in love with you too."

Olivia laughed then…a sense of relief coursing through her.

Elliot grinned, actually thankful for some relief from the serious tone of the conversation. "I tell you that I love you and you laugh?" He teased, dropping their hands and tangling his fingers with his.

"It's just such a relief to finally say it." Olivia said. "For so long, I've kept those feelings locked away. I've tried to deny it. To tell myself all the reasons that it wasn't true. Wasn't right." She squeezed his fingers. "But you're right. I should have told you a long time ago."

"That would have been too easy."

"And we don't do easy."

Olivia laughed again. "You're right about that." She found that she couldn't stop smiling, and the way Elliot was looking at her made her blush. "So…now what?"

"Well…now, we start the rest of our life…together." He tugged her hand slightly. "But first…" His eyes moved to her lips. "First, I'm going to kiss you."