Title: Wishes and Hopes.

Summary: Rin sees Sesshoumaru bathing and wants the impossible.


Rin awoke and saw that it was not yet morning. It would be quite a long while before the sun came up, but Rin could not sleep. She looked around the clearing and saw AhUn beside her, sound asleep, and Jakken snoring across the fire. She did not see her lord. It was odd for him to be out of her view. Perhaps he was angry.

She had visited a village the day before to get some things and talk to the locals. Perhaps that angered Lord Sesshoumaru. When she came back Jakken had told her she smelled horribly of human. If Jakken's weak demon senses were disturbed then likely it was putrid to her Lord. Perhaps she ought to go and bathe in the stream. Perhaps he would no longer be angry then.

She sat up quietly and slid out of her furs. She got up and tiptoed out of the clearing. She remembered that there was a very nice stream. She walked through the thick trees and hoped she was going the right way. She saw that the trees were thinning out and knew she was. She saw the crystal clear waters and the reeds surrounding the stream. She looked upstream and suddenly she jumped back. Someone was in the water! She hid behind a tree and peered out. She saw the figure again, suddenly she gasped. It was Sesshoumaru-sama! She saw his silvery hair catch the moonlight. What was he doing? He had nothing covering him! Rin turned away quickly again and hid behind the tree. What if he heard her?

She couldn't help it, she had to look again. She tried her best to breathe quietly and she peered out. There he was, standing waist deep in the stream. He was looking up and into the water, but thankfully he wasn't looking her way. She couldn't help but stare at the perfection that was he. She had seen male's chests before, like when they worked in the fields, or when they were sick, but Sesshoumaru-sama's torso was truly divine. She felt a funny warm sensation travel from her belly to down even lower. She felt shameful, but she couldn't look away.

She had never seen her Lord without all his clothes. She had thought about it she realized shamefully, but never dreamed of ever seeing him. He looked so much like a man, if only he was, then perhaps he would see her as the woman that she is. He was so perfect, the moonlight making his pale skin and hair gleam, water tracing down the perfect lines of his abdomen. What was under the water she couldn't even imagine. She felt her face and noticed a blush was burning in her cheeks.

She looked down at herself, sure she was pretty. Many village boys had fawned over her when she visited. Kohaku had asked her for her hand in marriage earlier that year as well; she just couldn't leave her Lord. She knew that her beauty would fade, and that Sesshoumaru's would not. He would never lower himself so. He had more than let it be known that he hates humans. And that he especially hates hanyous and the mating between humans and demon. There was absolutely no chance he would ever want her. She felt her cheek and noticed a stream of tears running down her face. She put her hands over her face. How Jakken would laugh at her silliness.

She wiped her tears and peered back out to see where her Sesshoumaru- sama was. He wasn't there anymore. She suddenly panicked and looked around franticly. Should she run back to camp? Or stay here? She took a few steps forward and suddenly something landed right in front of her. Thump, she fell backwards on her behind. She looked up into amber eyes.

"Rin, are you hurt? Why is it that you cry?" he said with his gruff, deadly voice. She noticed that he still had nothing covering his chest.

"No...I am fine." She whispered. Did he know that she had been watching?

"Then why is it that you cry?" he said again.

"I- no reason really." She said uneasily.

"Tell this Sesshoumaru." he said a bit more commandingly.

"A petty human feeling is all." She said hatefully.

"What feeling? Hate? Sadness?" he offered.

"Hm, no I guess I was just wishing. Hoping for the impossible." She said wistfully.

"Wishes, hopes. You should have none. Tell this Sesshoumaru what you want and you will have it." He said protectively.

"No, Sesshoumaru-sama, this is one thing I shall never have." She said sadly, more tears trailing down her face.

"Fine, if you do not wish to tell me then let it be so, but this Sesshoumaru wants no more tears." He said as he hoisted her up and began carrying her back to the clearing. She felt woozy being pressed against his bare flesh. As she had pondered so many times, it felt like silk over steel.

"Rin, why is it you stay with me." He said without looking at her. "Do you not wish to have a family? You could have done so with that boy." He said.

"Of course I want a family. But I could never leave you." She said softly. He looked down into her sad, warm brown eyes, and she looked into his cold, amber eyes.

'If only' she thought.

'Perhaps...' he thought.

A/N: I just had an intriguing idea. I tried to make it as good as possible but I realize you may be feeling unsatisfied. But I think you get the drift of the future here, Rin gets sad and then Sesshoumaru considers her more and more till Bam one day they live happily ever after. I always like to think they live happily ever after. I am not a tragedy girl. I just wanted to capture Rin's wanting and angst. Hope you liked it.