So, this chapter is dedicated as big fuck you to the cunt who's review I deleted :D They came up with a real original, thoughtful and heart felt comment that took all of two seconds to delete. And had the opposite effect to the desired one by encouraging me to keep going with this. Well done that child!
Anyway, singling sad acts out, go read the rest o' this:
Following Brandish into the lingerie shop for some reason had my heartrate going up significantly; it was a bit like being a teenager caught reading a men's magazine. Brandish had simply stopped after walking into the store, looking all around.
"Are all stores like this here?"
"If you mean 'are they filled with every conceivable type of ladies' underwear known to man,' no, no they aren't."
Ignoring my nervous quip, the mage out of place started looking around at the various garments on display. As it was early on a Saturday morning, we had the shop to ourselves pretty much, save for the two sales assistants pottering about. One of the women, a young brunette about the same age as me, wondered over to Brandish to ask if she needed any help. The shield nodded her head and the pair started going around the various clothes racks with all sorts of bras and knickers on display.
Naively I followed behind, half curious and half because I'd yet to find somewhere to sit down. The shop was laid out in quarters; the left side was underwear, middle was swimwear, the right was night clothes and the rear was 50 Shades of Grey territory. The thing I noticed was that the closer you got to the back wall, the more risqué the items on offer became; at the front of the store is just regular old bras and knickers, a bit vivid in colour and lacey patterns, then as you get toward the middle you start getting corsets, garter belts and stockings thrown into the mix, and just before you enter Sunstone territory you get bras that are more like harnesses and crotchless knickers. What a view that would've been earlier this morning!
After about 15 minutes or so, the nerves had started to die down and the boredom was beginning to set in. I made my excuses and found the only collection of seats in the shop, right at the back of the store surrounded by various types of dildos, vibrators and plugs…
If someone had told me last week that I was going to spend this Saturday morning first with my head between Brandish Mu's legs before being followed up an hour later flanked by tens of plastic, glass and rubber penises I'd have told them to quit the wacky baccy.
Brandish had picked out a selection of stuff to try on in various sizes; obviously Alvarez sizes didn't match UK ones. The sails assistant showed her to the fitting rooms which were at the back of the store left of the sex and BDSM toys.
"Ara, why didn't you tell me this shop doubled up as some sort of sex dungeon, pervert?"
"You didn't exactly give me much time to say anything before you just waltzed in!"
"Whatever," Without another word the Shield of Spriggan took her selection into the changing area and closed the curtain.
Resigning myself to waiting induced boredom, I took my phone out to have a browse at the world wide web. A couple of minutes later though I heard the curtain rail slide across. I paid it no mind because, even though it was early, I thought someone else must've come in wanting to try something on.
"What do you think?" I heard Brandish ask.
"What do you mean 'what do I think- ?!" Looking away from my phone I was completely speechless. Brandish stood in the changing room, curtain drawn back, wearing a wet-look one-piece outfit that had a cleavage that plunged down to her naval. Said cleavage was held together with three buckles across the front. "Oh my God,"
Trying not to make it obvious that the 'gentleman downstairs' was trying to do it's best impression of the various toys that flanked the seat I was in, I rushed over to the green haired woman, turning her around pushing her back into the changing room and closing the curtain behind. At that point I saw the back of the outfit as well; thong cut, sheer mesh that only went up to her lower back.
"What are you doing?" Brandish protested, about as indignant as she could muster having turned back around to look me straight in the eye. Even so, I could see her behind in the mirror.
"What am I doing? What are you doing? This is a shop open to the public, you don't just go showing off like that, as much I'm enjoying the view."
"I told you already, I don't care what other people think."
As I was about to retort but we both heard footsteps come to a stop just outside. "Excuse me, is everything alright?" The shop assistant who had helped Brandish had come over to make sure she was OK, and that we weren't bumping nasties. I took that as my cue to vacate.
"Sorry, she's not quite used to British customs yet,"
After that little episode, I went back to the internet whilst Brandish tried various other pieces on. About half an hour went by when Brandish re-emerged from the changing room, back in my black shirt and jeans. "Help me with these."
A 'please' would have been nice, but anyway I went and helped her take the stuff she wanted to the till and the stuff that didn't fit or she didn't like back to where she'd got it from. The woman behind the till totted up the total for Brandish's selection, surprisingly it wasn't quite as eye watering as I'd expected. As I went to get my wallet out the assistant passed a comment to Brandish.
"That's very thoughtful of your boyfriend," without a flicker or change in expression Brandish's retort was sharp and to the point.
"He's not my boyfriend."
"Oh, I see. One of those relationships," the assistant winked slyly, implying we were in some sort of financial domination type relationship.
Stopping dead in my tracks as I was getting my card out, I gave her a withering look. "I'm doing her a favour. Plus, I don't bark on all fours." Glancing to my companion I saw an embarrassed blush on her cheeks.
After paying for the various items we left, heading across the street to a locksmith next. Brandish passed comment about it not looking particularly attractive. We were only there to get another key cut for the house so she could have some independence and wouldn't have to rely totally on me.
Once that was sorted, we headed to various other outlets and department stores. By lunchtime we both had many shopping bags, and I had a wallet that was decidedly lighter than I would have liked…
Brandish had changed into a new outfit after we'd finished in the last shop. My shirt and jeans had been replaced with a purple blouse and a black miniskirt. I hadn't the bottle to check what underwear she'd replaced her bikini with…
Before we were going to head back to the house, we made a detour to a supermarket to get her some household essentials, shampoo, soap, toothbrush, toothpaste and a cheap Nokia type phone. There was a quick stop into the fruit isle too for a small tub of diced mangoes. With all that sorted we headed back to the house.
Whilst making lunch at the house I also blitzed the mangoes, made a sugar syrup, mixed the two together and stuck it in the freezer. Unsure of what to do for the rest of the day I asked my new roommate what she fancied doing, to which she asked to go to the nearest beach.
Fortunately, living on an island meant that the beach was a 20-minute walk southbound. However, there was a quick detour to the stadium I worked at to buy Brandish a ticket for the match tomorrow. Why did I buy her a ticket? Basically, so I could keep an eye on her whilst I was at work. Let's face it; she's not even been here a day yet; would you trust an alien to manage on its own after landing on the planet less than 24 hours ago? Didn't think so. Oh, you would? Never mind then.
Anyway, that sorted we went down to the beach. The route was pretty much a straight line down to the town's pier. Going onto the pier was a bit of a wash with a bloody gale blowing in off the sea. Mind it gave us a talking point.
"What are those crosses on your head?"
"Hair clips."
"Seriously? How are they staying put in this wind?"
"You ask too many questions." Abandoning the pier, we started to stroll along the promenade for a bit before Brandish veered off down to the water's edge. It was slow going though because she almost managed to break her ankle on more than one occasion navigating the shingle shore. "Why is the beach covered in blasted pebbles?" The green-haired woman was frustrated because her high-heeled sandals weren't exactly ideal for traversing the shingle beach. Most beaches in the south east of England are shingle beaches, mostly – if not entirely – for coastal defence.
Having successfully navigated two thirds of the way down to the beach, the shingle struck again; Brandish got her heel stuck and stumbled. I managed to catch her but with her freeing her foot at the same time caused the both of us to fall over. Before either of us knew it, we were on the ground, Brandish on top of me, faces little more than a few inches away from each other.
"I'm so sorry, I don't know what happened! Are you alright?" I asked, making a conscious effort not to look down at the Shield's cleavage. She muttered an affirmative as she sat up on her knees, taking her sandals off. Well that's the third time in less than a day we've ended up in compromising situations together; first face between her legs, second in the changing room together, and now reverse missionary into cowboy at the beach. Christ, when's doggy style and 69's turns? Ah shit, I've given the author ideas now…
Before things could get any weirder, we both stood up and went down to the water's edge. "This beach would be much nicer with sand." Brandish lamented, pebbles clacking together underfoot.
"Even though I grew up not far from a shingle beach, I agree. But if it was sand then it wouldn't be around for long. Plus you wouldn't be able to do this," Picking up a handful of pebbles I threw them in individually, managing to skip one about three times before a wave crashed down on top of it.
The green haired woman watched as I picked up another few pebbles before picking one up herself. She stared at it for a bit before throwing it in the sea. We stood in the same spot for about 20 minutes throwing pebbles, careful not to hit anyone or anything that might cross our paths. We even had a couple of games; who could throw the furthest, who could make the best splash and despite the waves who could skip it furthest. If you want to know Brandish won 2:1.
When the waves began to lap at Brandish's ankles, we took that as our cue to head back to the promenade. We took a long way home, going up toward the university's main campus and back along my normal route back to the house.
It was about early evening by the time we got back to the house. I pretty much went straight to the kitchen to start making dinner, Brandish watching me as I went about prepping everything.
Not long after I started Jimmy came downstairs and into the kitchen. "You alright Miserable?" Jimmy was about two or three inches taller than me, about three stone heavier, and light brown hair down to his shoulder blades tied in a low ponytail.
"You alright, Poor?" Jimmy was a metal head that always wore black and always had a septum ring in, great lad to be fair, but on his first appearance in the story you'd be forgiven for thinking otherwise. He looked at Brandish with an eye of suspicion then to me.
"The fuck is she?"
"This is Brandish, she's from-"
"The Spriggan 12."
I just stared at her incredulously. "Really?" She just gave me a look, as if her eyes were shrugging.
"Spriggan 12? Aye, that's some Cornish folklore right there. You from Cornwall or something?" Realising that I was going to have to listen to Jimmy go on about Cornish independence again I just got on with the job of cooking dinner. Jimmy started making his own as well as he went on and on about the supposed benefits of separating from England but not the United Kingdom.
Brandish went and sat down on the sofa, a look of total disinterest on her features. Having said that she did engage with heavy metal rocker, explaining that Spriggan 12 was just a name that she and a group of people online she knew called themselves.
"She's going to be staying with us for a while," I mentioned nonchalantly.
It was Jimmy's turn to look incredulous. "Really? Why's that?"
"I was forced to leave my home, and this was the only place I could think of." Ouch, whilst true, that hurt.
"Do you not have any family in the US you could go to?" Don't know if Jimmy asked that to genuinely probe for more information or because he wasn't happy with the idea of another undeclared resident living with us alongside Iggy.
"I was raised by my mother in Alvarez singlehandedly before she was murdered. I don't have any family." That clearly struck a nerve, and if it wasn't for the fact we'd found out that there was a town in the US called Alvarez, we might've been sunk there.
"Your mum was murdered? I'm sorry, I feel awful now. Ali, why didn't you mention that earlier?"
"Hardly my place to mention it, if Brandish wants people to know then it's up to her to tell them."
"Exactly." Pretty much at that exact moment our dinner was ready to be plated up. Nothing special today unfortunately, beef burgers and chips. Mind, after a suggestion from Jimmy we spruced it up a little by putting paprika on the chips.
Brandish took her plate and went upstairs to my room. Whether that was because she was annoyed with Jimmy or not, I don't know. Might even have been because of me to be fair. Before I followed her up, I mentioned to Jimmy that Brandish would be at work with us tomorrow. Jimmy also works at the stadium in the same role as I do just in a different part.
Anyway, we ate dinner, both enjoying it quite a bit despite being nothing fancy. I took the plates downstairs to be washed and came back up with a small glass for the mage out of place.
"Is that what I think it is?" Brandish's eyes had lit up as I handed her the glass with two yellow globs of frozen food. "Star mango gelato?"
"It's the closest I can make; mango sorbet." A look of devastation appeared on her face as it sunk in.
"My star mango gelato," taking the glass and spoon with tears in her eyes she tried a bit, probably out of politeness. Pretty much the same reaction as yesterday occurred when she realised how sweet and fruity my sorbet was. "…!" She was so enamoured with it that she gave herself brain freeze!
"You alright?" I asked as Brandish clutched her head for a second. When it subsided, she pulled my head into her chest, catching me totally by surprise! "Uh Brandish? What are you doing? Brandish?!"
As I struggled to remove my face from her buxom chest, she was making her cutesy face, apparently utterly smitten by my new-found ability to make sweets. "You're going to be newest pet!"
Unsure of how to react to that announcement, now struggling to breathe, I just woofed into her chest. That had a partially desired affect as she let me go for a second. "I had no idea you could be so cute…!"
"We'll see about that…"
Not going to lie, this was starting to drag towards the end whilst writing it. So might as well stop there.
Next chapter; football. Or something, I dunno, we'll see.
