AN: Here it is! Hope you people out there are all enjoying this hilarious tale.

Disclaimer : I don't own OnePiece, nor the following story that is in here - but I'm not going to give it away. He he hee


Chapter Four

Lincoln clothes and Burnt spaghetti


He turned into time to see the arrow fly true. Its silver point glistened in the morning light. Chopper reared his legs, startled and took off.

"Robin," smirked a huge man, "you can't shoot an arrow to save your dear old mother's life."

Robin, a young hero that lived in the Sherwood Forest and one of the best archers to ever live, fumed. "I will get that deer and bring it down by the horns!" True to his words, Robin Hood went in the direction he saw the deer fled. After two hundred meters, give or take, Robin found himself staring at a weird creature who was hiding itself in the most peculiar of ways. Only half its face was hidden, the rest of his body was visible from the tree it was standing at.

"My my," muttered Robin, rubbing his chin, "what a funny looking beaver."

"I AM NOT," suddenly the creature had grown large. Muscles bulged from its once tiny arms and legs. "A BEAVER." He picked up the ruffian and brought him to his face. "Why were you hunting me?"

"I…I…I…I'm Robin Hood," he held out a weak hand, "nice to meet you."

The giant smiled. "I'm Chopper the reindeer." He put the forest man back on the ground and took the offered hand.

Robin looked at huge creature, half-man and half-reindeer. He was strong…he grinned. "You, dear Chopper, must come and join my band of Merry Men."

Chopper raised an eyebrow. "Your band of Fairy what?"

The forest man gave a slight hurt look. "You haven't heard of my band of Merry Men?"

He shook his head. "Never heard of them."

"Never?"

"Never." Chopper picked up a blue knapsack. "It was nice talking to you, Mr. Hood…" Robin had grabbed Chopper's huge arm and was pulling on it frantically.

"PLEASE!" The man in Lincoln green cried. "I NEED BIG STRONG BEAVERS LIKE YOU IN MY BAND OF MERRY MEN!"

The reindeer man easily shook the strange person of his arm. "I'm sorry," he said, "but I have to find my friends."

Robin's ears perked up. "Your friends?"

"Yeah, I lost them about a year ago," he rubbed his forehead sadly, "and I can't find them." He watched as Robin rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "One of your friends wouldn't happen to be Roaming Limbs would it?"

"I've never heard of him."

"Her," corrected Robin Hood. "She came to our town about a year ago looking for some people. Roaming Limbs has some awesome power."

Chopper was eager for more information. "What power?"

"She's a fortune teller!"

Chopper sighed. "That's not who I'm looking for."

"Oh," the forest man looked disappointed. "I suppose you don't mind if I tagged along and help you look for your friends do you, Chopper?"

Chopper smiled. "That would help, thanks."

The two began walking along a trodden path. "So," began Robin, "you've already looked in Sherwood Forest?"

"Yeah, I have."

"Hmm, have you ever thought about going to the Forbidden Forest? It's about a mile away and I hear it's rather a pleasant place."

The big creature shrugged. "May as well."

"JOLLY GOOD!" He abruptly changed his direction. "THIS WAY MY GOOD MAN!"

I do not know if it was a cloud passing over the sun, but to Chopper and to myself, this way seemed slightly darker. Perhaps it was the owl hooting overhead, or perhaps dear Chopper should just ignore the really, really bad feeling going down his spine.


Luffy wiped his long fringe out of his face and stared up at the huge white castle standing before him. "TOO COOL! TOO COOL!" The crew and Usopp made their way up the ridiculously numerous stairs. Finally reaching the top, Sanji pointed at a large sign hanging on the front door. It read: NO DOGS ALLOWED.

Zolo cocked his head to one side. "I can't read it, it's too high up."

Luffy sprinted over to it. "It says no dogs allowed. COOL! Zolo's a wolf, he can come in!"

Sanji turned to the sign over. Which read: 'NO WOLVES ALLOWED'.

The captain's jaw dropped. "SANJI!"

The chef shrugged. "That's the rules, Luffy."

"No," he sat down beneath the sign. "No, I want Zolo to come in. I'm not going in if Zolo can't come in."

Usopp leaned across to Nami. "Is he always like this? Stubborn?" He whispered. She nodded.

Luffy motioned to Zolo, who obediently went to his captain, and wrapped his arms around the green wolf. "I'm not moving," he declared.

Zolo sat down beside his captain and gave a grin at Sanji. "Listen to the captain," he smirked.

Luffy began scratching his first mate between the ears, which, much to the captain's amusement, was making Zolo's eyes close.

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Fine, bring the pet."

Zolo's eyes snapped open, he broke free from Luffy's clutches and snapped at his rubber hand. "DON'T EVER DO THAT AGAIN YOU RUBBER IDIOT."

Luffy stood up and grinned. "Aw, come on Zolo – you liked it." He followed Sanji through the large doorway.

Nami patted Zolo on the head. "Good boy," she cooed and walked in.

The swords-wolf stared as the long nose man made to do the same, he growled dangerously. Usopp ran after the others. Muttering to himself, the green wolf reluctantly went inside.

Usopp gazed high at the fine ceilings and decorated walls – utterly gob-smacked. Sanji was a prince with taste.

Nami's eyes were wide with absolute wonder. "Look at all this gold!" She screamed, taking a golden candleholder.

Sanji twirled over to her. "If you like it Nami, it's all yours!"

Nami screamed again and gave Sanji a rib-crushing hug. "YOU'RE THE BEST SANJI!"

The chef's face went rose-red and a heart flew to his eye. "You're…welcome!"

Zolo found a corner and lay down, curling up so his nose touched his bushy tail.

"Oi, Marimo." He looked up to find the blonde prince staring down at him. "No lying on the polished floors."

Zolo was saved as Luffy came over to defend him. "Sanji," pouted Luffy, "Zolo's alright, he can lie down on the floor." He sat down next to the wolf and dragged his first mate into his lap – ignoring the wriggling attempts of him trying to break free. Sanji stalked off. "Isn't this GREAT!" declared Luffy to his swords-wolf. "You're so much better as a wolf Zolo! You should stay like this forever!"

"LET GO LUFFY!" He tried to wriggle out of his captain's grip. "OR I'LL…" Luffy began scratching his belly, which was having an odd effect on him. "OR…I…WILL…" his hind leg began moving to Luffy's rhythmic scratching.

Luffy laughed as Zolo suddenly became dead still on his back; his long tongue fell out of his mouth and slapped on the polished floor. "Look Nami!" He said to his navigator. "Zolo's doing something weird with his leg!"

Nami came over to have a proper look. "That's what they do when you tickle their belly. I guess it works with Zolo as well." She sat down with the two. "I just adore his fluffy green tail."

Usopp come over and sat down as well. "I thought he doesn't like being petted, so why is he just…just lying there, doing that weird leg thing?"

"He's been seduced," replied Nami evilly.

Sanji watched the group coddling the green sword-wielding wolf. "Ugh, that's just wrong." He lit another cigarette and walked over to them. "Luffy, it's going to be dinner time soon."

"Really! What are you making Sanji?"

Sanji bit down on the cigarette butt. "Nothing," he said darkly, "the palace chef will be making it."

Luffy' face fell. "Eh? Why not?" He watched Sanji sulked away. He turned to Nami for an explanation.

"He's been cursed," she whispered. "Everything he cooks burns and tastes foul."

The captain looked horrified. "Well," he announced. "I am going to help the palace chef!" He stopped scratching his first mate's stomach and quickly ran off before he regained his composure.

"GET BACK HERE LUFFY!" Snarled the wolf, leaping to his feet. "I'M GOING TO HURT YOU!"

Nami, Sanji, Usopp and Zolo waited an entire hour for their meal. During that time, there came much clanging, raging, and Italian accented swearing from in the kitchen. After the hour was up, the palace chef, an Italian man, ran out of the kitchen crying.

"I don'ta know how he did," he cried. "But'e did, und now it's destroyed!"

Luffy came out of the kitchen holding a bowl of something black and burnt above his head.

The Italian chef looked devastated. "He burnt da spaghetti! HOW ON EARTH DO'YA BURN SPAGHETTI?"

For those who do not cook, or, are not familiar with the word, I shall fill you in. It is incredibly hard to burn spaghetti because it is cooked (boiled) in water. Now, it can go hard, and it can go soft – but it cannot go black and burn. I know full well. For, you see, I used to attend the 'Royal Academy for Burning Food', a famous school and I am sure you have heard of it. My final test, before I graduated from my last year there, was to burn spaghetti. I failed shamefully and have spent the rest of my life as a humble storyteller. If you, dear reader, are recently attending the 'Royal Academy for Burning Food ,' then I might ask Mr. Luffy how he happened to work a miracle such as burning spaghetti, on your behalf. Perhaps with his knowledge, or sheer dumb luck, you will pass the final examination and live a more, prosperous, life than me.

The Italian chef pointed a finger at Luffy; who stared blankly back at him. "He is'a crazy, CRAZY I tell you!" He began making weaving motions with his arms. "His limb'sa go everywhere! Dey're over dere und then dey're over dere. IT'SA NIGHTMARE!" He flopped into the nearest chair. "I'ma ruined! He's drained all the love'a for cookin' outa me!" He suddenly jumped to his feet – horrified. "UND HE EATS'A LIKE A PIG!" Very soon, he was ranting to himself. Sanji motioned the palace guards to take him away.

"NO NO! I SWEAR! HIS MOUTH GOES'A DIS BIG!"

Zolo took his paws off the table and jumped off his seat. "Not that I wasn't looking forward to something to eat, but, let's get out of this dump."

Luffy threw his bowl of spaghetti at the wall, where it smashed, the black contents dripping to the floor. "I tried," he shrugged, "but I kept burning the spaghetti, I guess I can't cook."

Usopp shuddered at the foul black spaghetti as it ate a hole through the stone work. "Boy," he muttered, "doesn't that ruin your appetite."

Nami stood up and was about to lead when she stopped. "Remind me," she said. "Which way is the exit?"

Sanji pointed to the corridor on the left. Nami smiled and headed right.

Luffy watched her go. "Let me guess, Nami can't navigate, right?" Zolo nodded. "Eh, that's bad, since we all suck at directions and stuff." He reached down and tried to scratch his first mate between the ears.


Chopper raised a hand against the afternoon glare as he peered at the castle in the distance. "Robin," he began, turning to his new Lincoln clothed companion. "What castle is that?"

Robin looked up from tying his shoelaces. "Hmm? Oh, that castle." He stood up. "That's Hogwarts."

"Really? Never heard of that either."

"It's a school where witches and wizards are taught magic." The forest man explained. "The famous Harry Potter goes to school there."

Chopper looked confused. "Marry who?"

"BLIMEY!" Cried Robin Hood. "Don't tell me you don't know who Harry Potter is!" He received a lost look from his huge comrade. "Why he defeated," his voice dropped to a whisper, "he-who-must-not-be-named."

Chopper whispered too. "Who's that?"

Robin broke out into a sweat. "V – V – Vol…"

"Why don't you spell it?" Suggested the previous doctor of the straw-hat crew.

"No good, I can't read or write…okay…its…VOLDEMORT!" Chopper blocked his ears. "Sorry, but he's a really scary guy."

"Really?!" Chopper could feel his teeth chatter. "Where is he?"

Robin Hood gave a cheery grin. "What do you mean where is he? He's dead of course – died from a heart attack or something. Anyway, FORWARD MARCH MY BEAVER COMPANION!"

We leave young Chopper to gaze away at the castle a little longer before using the powers of 'storytelling' to re-direct ourselves to where the action is really taking place. About ten steps away from where Robin Hood and Chopper are heading. Funny how that really bad feeling never goes away.


AN: Had to mention Harry Potter since they were in the Forbidden Forest and all - I think Robin Hood is weird :D Anyways , I hope I did the Luffy-Zolo interaction good ((waves to Emma Iveli)) and Chopper is found YAY! I think we all know who Wandering Limbs is ((sniggers evil-like)) but you can guess if you like - in your REVIEWS!

Robin Hood: No good, I can't read or write