Just before dinner T-Dog helped him take the dead man out of the office and haul him down to the house.
"That's just messed UP." T-Dog told him, pointing to the two teenage walkers strapped to a bed. There were two more in the next room, same thing. Rick had been right; they'd been killed by people, not walkers. The man in the office had a bite on his arm and had been infected. Daryl figured when the fever hit him, he'd gone in the office but he'd never been able to pull the trigger.
"The guy up there got bit by one wanderin' by. This mess – it's just - bizzare."
T-Dog shook his head, adjusting the do-rag over his nose. "All I know is I don't wanna stay here too long."
"Don't have to argue that one with me." The place had enough to keep them going for awhile but it'd be best to move on as soon as they got stocked up. "I thought I'd seen it all with the walkers. We'll pack the vehicles tonight with all we can, food, the clothing, campin' gear and any weapons we can find."
T-Dog nodded and they started back up the hill. He caught sight of Carol in the doorway, her plate in her hand. When he met her eyes, she retreated back into the mess hall.
He and T-Dog were met at the door with platefuls of food – Tuna and noodles in some kind of sauce and fresh biscuits. He felt a deep rumble roll up from the pit of his stomach when he smelled it.
"I thought you might be hungry." Carol mused, looking more at Daryl than T-Dog.
He took a few bites on the way to the table, where she took a seat next to him with her own plate which had much less on it than his. Elbowing her lightly, he whispered, "You need ta eat more."
She glanced at him, flushed, which brought out the freckles that dusted her cheeks. "This is enough for me. I've always eaten like a bird."
He grumbled and focused on his own plate, though he did notice she finished every crumb, and even put honey on her biscuit.
After dinner, the leftovers were packed away and most of the dry goods stored in the trunks of the cars. Breakfast was prepared in advance for morning. He was waiting for Carol to question him as to why they weren't staying here longer when Lori brought it up to the group as a whole, as she was still avoiding Rick.
Only Rick, T-Dog and Daryl knew what lay beyond them in the house down below. Daryl cleared his throat. "Place's too close to the road." He gestured to Rick, "The prison is an hour up the road. We got food, more fuel, camping gear now, we can get close and scope it out."
Rick chimed in. "I think it's important to find a place that's more secure."
Hershel wiped his mouth, "The farm's gone and now I'm headed to the big house. Never thought I'd say that."
His joke earned a giggle from Maggie and Glenn and a meek smile from Beth. Daryl wondered if the old man had found some booze somewhere, but was just as grateful to be off the subject.
The sun had been setting earlier each day, and the rainy air grew cold. It was nice to be able to build an actual fire in the fire place, rather than having to be outdoors, having to control the flames. Soon the room was cozy. Leaving the lights down low and the windows covered, they started going through the boxes and dividing up the clothes. Daryl wound up with two pairs of cargo pants and he, Glenn and Hershel split the shirts. T-Dog ended up with new boots and a hoodie. The girls were in the kitchen going through their things and he didn't like being that far away from Carol. But she let the door swing open soon enough looking completely uncomfortable in a pair of jeans that hugged her curves, a black long sleeved shirt, a gray fleece vest and black hiking boots.
Blood pumped through his veins traveling at warp speed. He had to think twice as to whether his mouth had hit the floor or not. T-Dog nudged him, grinning. Glenn had noticed too.
"Shut-up." He told them as quietly as he could but he knew she heard him as she sat indian style near them.
"What?" She asked the three of them, exasperated. "I know I'm too old to wear clothes like this."
Glenn and T-Dog started shaking their heads, "No, no Carol, you look – wow." Glenn said.
Daryl shot him a dirty look and stole a long glance at her while she was distracted. He tried to stop imagining what could've been for her if not for the walkers taking over the world, if not for Ed. She had an elegance about her he hadn't noticed before and she was built like a brick shit house to boot. She'd hidden herself for far too long under them frumpy clothes.
"Well, anyone else ready for a treat?" Lori said, eying Rick, who stood near the door. He had his arm wrapped around Carl but let him go to Lori with a quick nudge. She held a huge bag of marshmallows. Beth and Maggie came out next and they all sat around the fireplace while Rick made a sweep of the large space.
In the large wash area next to the kitchen they'd found a few pillows and more blankets. It seemed close to midnight when the last person finally sacked out. Daryl and Glenn were on watch, Daryl at the front, Glenn at the back. In a few hours Rick and T-Dog would relieve them.
He walked out onto the porch, noticing the rain had passed and the stars were out. The crossbow sat balanced between his legs and he took a rag out of his back pocket, ready to wipe it down. Within a minute or two Carol joined him on the steps, wrapping his jacket and vest around his shoulders. She left enough space between the two of them but not enough to keep his cheeks from turning red. Thank Christ it was dark out.
He murmured, "Thanks" and began waxing the bow string. "Found some paraffin wax in the pantry."
She set down a fresh mug of instant coffee. "Thought you might need this to stay awake till Rick takes over."
He glanced at her sideways. "You still blame him."
She twisted her whole body to look at him questioningly and then sighed. "I'll never get over the fact that he left her, but nothin's gonna change the fact that she's gone. He's got his own demons to deal with. Do you blame him?" She asked, turning his question on him.
Daryl stopped his ritual for a moment and stared out into the yard. "No. I just know that if it'd been me, I'da brought her back." It may have been cocky of him to think like that. He had a lot of respect for Rick, he just knew if he had been on her trail just a little bit sooner Sophia would be alive today.
"I believe that Daryl." She told him quietly, gazing up at the stars. "And I believe I'll see her again. My little girl's waiting for me."
Daryl froze. He didn't like hearing her talk like that. They'd watched her at the farm for weeks after Sophia's death, hopin' she wouldn't do herself in. How could he change the subject? "It's ah, strange lookin' up in the sky and not seein' any planes flyin' over blinkin their lights."
She pulled her sleeves over her hands, and he sighed and took off his coat and vest and put it over her shoulders.
"I brought them out for you."
"Don't argue with me. I got long sleeves on, see?" He felt a smile pullin' at his mouth and stopped it in mid curve. "I used to count the planes that'd fly by when I'd lay out at night in the court yard where I worked."
"Where did you work?"
"A foundry. Maintenance, I know shocking, Daryl Dixon had a job before the fuckin' apocalypse." When she didn't act shocked and seemed like she was waiting for him to say more, he shrugged. "Someone had ta keep food on the table. Merle wasn't gonna do it steady. Worked twelve hour days, swing shifts, but on break I'd head to the roof, or the courtyard as I called it. Had flowers and shit up there. Hell wound up seein' more shooting stars than planes. Used to think I'd fly one someday - plane that is."
Sadness marked her features. "Funny how everything up there has just kept goin', unbeknown of what's happening down here."
He gave another sideways glance and saw the way the jeans hugged her calves, letting his eyes move up.
"What you lookin' at Daryl? I know I ain't no beauty queen."
He shifted, uneasy, ready to bolt up the hill or head inside if she got mad.
"You wanna know why my hair's so short? Actually it's just startin' to grow back in." She said, running her fingers through it. Two years ago, I was diagnosed with uterine cancer."
He felt his heart stop, couldn't breathe 'till she went on to tell him she was cured – that it was okay.
"Most people thought I kept it short cause of Ed. That was a plus let me tell ya." She laughed, but it sounded unnatural.
"I always liked your hair like that."
A smile came to her lips but she continued quickly. "Only a few people knew, I never told Sophia. She stayed with Ed's mom when I had surgery. It was then they told me I was only in stage one. I needed a few rounds of chemo which was hell. If you ever thought what we're livin' now is, try that, but it went away and I'm prayin' it doesn't come back." She rocked back and forth with her hands on her knees, clearly uncomfortable talkin' about it.
It made him feel even worse for anytime he ever got in her face. She'd had to deal with the abuse, protecting her daughter and a major illness. And now when normally he'd be starin' off into the sky or the distance he couldn't keep his eyes off her.
"See, it shoulda been me in that barn." Her voice shook. "She had her whole life ahead of her and she was healthy."
"No." Daryl whispered; his damned voice cracking. "It's not right she's gone, but it wouldn't be if you were too."
Her eyes fastened on his. He didn't know how to do it, or what it was pulling him toward her but it felt like some kinda crazy gravity, like a drug. He placed the palm of his hand between them on the steps, knowing she was watching his every move, feeling his every shake without even touching him. He leaned closer and saw the worry in her eyes.
"Please, don't feel sorry for me." She whispered.
"I don't feel sorry for no one." He whispered back and that was the damned truth.
He moved closer, unsure of what would happen next. Would she laugh at him? Get up and walk away? Would she slap him? If she did he'd had worse happen to him.
"Daryl." The words barely left her lips and he settled his on hers. They were soft and warm and she tasted like a toasted marshmallow.
His first kiss lasted for about fifteen seconds. He counted. And after, she stood up and put his coat and vest back over his shoulders. Before she walked through the door he heard her say, "I don't know if I'm ready for this."
When she closed the door he resumed his watch and prepping his bow, his heart beating wild inside him. "I can't say I am either."
