Long Road to Love

A Naruto Fanfiction

Shikamaru x Gaara

Chapter Four: The Bad News

Shikamaru leaned back with a slight frown, staring up at the clouds. Naruto and the others had run off to help Sunagakure get Gaara back. It was the first time Shikamaru hadn't been chosen for the mission, but that was because he'd been tied up in other things at the time. The Nijuu Shotai had him pretty busy, and while he knew what he was doing was important (and, of course, troublesome) he couldn't help but worry. He knew what the Akatsuki were after now, and if that was the case then there was a good chance Gaara could be killed. And what was he doing? He was laying on the roof, staring at the clouds.

"Shikamaru, are you listening?"

"Sorry, what?" the Nara asked, rolling his head to look at Genma.

"You're really distracted lately," Genma said.

Shikamaru sat up. "I just can't help but think about the situation in Sunagakure," he answered. "I wish we had some news, that's all."

"I guess I understand," Genma answered, but Shikamaru thought it was just something to say. He doubted Genma really understood how neurotically worried Shikamaru often became over his friends' well being. "It just seems a little strange, I guess," Genma continued. "I mean, no matter how you look at it, even as friends you and Sabaku no Gaara are a bad match." Genma wasn't worried about Shikamaru having romantic feelings for the red head; it just seemed far too out there to be even remotely plausible. He and Shikamaru were both naturally laid back, it made them good company for one another. The age difference was the only real dilemma, but no one bothered to say anything since the Nara was so mature for his age. Even his parents didn't seem to care: Nara Yoshino had long since given up on getting any grandchildren out of her lazy son and had taken to pestering her husband about having another baby. Shikaku was hesitant to put another child through life in their household, but it seemed as if his tyrannical wife was starting to wear him down.

Even if it was innocent though, the comment about him and Gaara being a 'bad match' did get Shikamaru to thinking. It was true. They were nothing alike and he had the feeling that if exposed to each other for long periods of time, they'd exhaust all possible conversations pretty quickly. There was no way around it. Even as friends they were a bad match. Gaara, the Nara had come to realize, was way too amazing a person to be hanging around with a lazy slacker like him. "Well, he doesn't have many friends. I guess he figures even a lazy ass like me is better than nothing," he answered absently, brushing off the conversation.

Genma accepted this and said, "are you going to come by tonight?"

Shikamaru gave a bland nod. "I guess so."

"Stay the night this time," Genma said.

"I have to feed the cat," Shikamaru answered. "Dad's away right now and Mom never remembers."

"That fat cat of yours isn't going to die if he skips a meal," Genma complained.

"Maybe not," Shikamaru said, "but he'll be mad at me."

Genma got up. "One of these days, you're going to have to find a better excuse than that cat," he said, "or I'm going to make you explain to me why you keep dating guys you aren't even particularly attracted to." He didn't know how much longer he could date the indifferent Nara before he gave up entirely. It was frustrating because he really was fond of Shikamaru and had thought it was only a matter of time before he grew on the younger nin. So far though, there were no signs of that happening and it was beginning to frustrate him.

"Because," Shikamaru answered without hesitating. "It's less troublesome."


'Even as friends, you're a bad match.' Shikamaru didn't know why those words haunted him so much; probably, he figured, because they were true. No matter how you sliced it, Gaara should be out of his league. The only reason Gaara didn't know it was because he needed attention so badly that even the lazy – and currently very self-conscious – Nara Shikamaru was good enough. "He's not wrong," Shikamaru mumbled, walking home, stretching some soreness out of his back to go feed the cat. "But I wish he wouldn't put it so bluntly. No better than that damn woman," he thought, Temari and her troublesome grin passing through his mind. "Meddlesome. Mildly irritating." He made his way inside and filled the cat's dish. The fat cat rubbed around his ankles contently before flopping in front of the bowl to eat. Straightening up again, Shikamaru winced a little. "...and a bit too rough." He decided to take a long, hot shower, but just as he was heading for the stairs there was a knock on the door. His mother had disappeared again, probably off window shopping for baby clothes for that younger brother she was dead set on him having, so he sighed and opened the door, blinking when he found Asuma at the door looking rather sullen.

"What is it?" he asked.

"I've got some news about the situation in Sunagakure. Since you're close to the Kazekage and his sister I thought you might want to know what's going on."

Shikamaru stepped aside. "Come on in. I'll make some tea."

Noticing the Nara was limping slightly he asked, "rough day?"

"... something like that," Shikamaru answered cryptically, gesturing at the kitchen table.

Asuma waited for the tea to be ready and for Shikamaru to take a seat. "No one home, huh?"

"Dad's got a mission and Mom's probably going all crazy over baby clothes and rattles again," Shikamaru answered. "Just tell me what's going on."

Asuma shifted, slightly uncomfortable. "I imagine you know that Gaara was taken by the Akatsuki."

"Yeah, everyone has," Shikamaru answered.

There was a silence as Asuma searched for a good way to say the rescue mission hadn't gone well, but finding there wasn't one, he continued. "I'll be frank. From what intelligence we have right now it would appear..."

"Just spit it out," Shikamaru complained, really wanting that hot shower and getting the feeling he was going to want it even more after hearing whatever Asuma had to say.

"The Akatsuki successfully removed the ichibi," Asuma said. "Gaara is dead, Shikamaru."

The tea the Nara was lifting to his lips slipped from numb fingers and spilled across the table and all over the floor, the ceramic cup shattering against the tabletop. It took Shikamaru a good ten seconds to notice the hot tea spilled across his lap, and when he did he stood, cursing and running to the sink. 'Gaara, dead? That's impossible!' he thought. 'There must be a mistake!' His stomach roiled as he remembered all the troublesome nonsense Gaara had put him through over the years. Hijacking him out of his bed in the middle of the night, all the ridiculous letters, the accidental stalking, and even the terror early on before Gaara had been so affected by Naruto.

"...Shikamaru."

A strangled sob escaped the Nara's lips before he clapped his hand over his mouth. 'I think I'm going to be sick,' he thought. Asuma rested a hand on the teenager's shoulder. "At times like this," he said, "If you need to cry, you should go ahead and cry."

"I..."

"He was someone important to you, wasn't he? I know how protective you are of the people you care about," Asuma said.

"And how indifferent to everyone else, right?" Shikamaru answered. "You're not wrong but...I won't cry yet," he said. "Thanks for telling me but, I kind of want to be alone for now."

"Shikamaru."

"Right now, it's only intelligence after all. If I cry before we're certain and it turns out we're wrong, I'll feel pretty stupid."

Asuma's heart went out to the young Nara. It was too painful for him to accept just yet, that's all. Shikamaru was strongly affected by loss. Maybe that's why he and Gaara had become closer as the years went on. Gaara had a lot of pain and Shikamaru couldn't turn away from the suffering of others, no matter how much posturing he did. "Thanks for the tea," he said, dropping the broken mug pieces in the trash. "Get some rest."

Shikamaru nodded blandly and the moment the door closed he sunk down to the floor, watching the tea dripping from the tabletop. It wasn't long before it started to blur and he buried his teary eyes against his knees. 'I ... I have to clean this up before mom gets home,' he thought. 'She'll flip out...' But he couldn't bring himself to move right away. Gaara couldn't really be dead, could he? Again, his earlier conversation with Genma came to mind. "One of these days... I'm going to make you explain to me why you keep dating guys you aren't even particularly attracted to."

Shikamaru repeated his answer now to the empty room, hugging his knees to his chest. "Because it's less troublesome," he muttered, "...than being in love."