Ways to Kill Dylan

Chapter 4

Show Dylan a Zeus bobblehead, and have him say on tape recorder "He has a big head." Then, show it to Zeus, and then he will zap Dylan's head, killing him.

Take his bones and break them to dust and stretch his arms to hurt like hell and then shoot him many places but don't let him bleed out, then cut his legs up into little pieces and punch him in his pretty face till its deformed shoot him where it counts and then cut them out stab one eye out so he can still see what you are doing with the other put him on fire until his skin burns off then use salt water to put it out then destroy his internal organs rip out his bones then take out the other eye the use a boulder to smush his arms and last rip and squeeze his arms out after pouring acid in his lungs

Bring him to a medieval chariot race. Then, knock him out, and tie each limb (all six) to a different chariot, each going different directions, and watch joyfully as each limb is torn apart from his body.

Bring him to a festival where they paint faces, and convince him to get the full body job. Use heavy quick-job paint to do this, which causes him to suffocate under the heaviness. Then wash him off and say that he was a crazy drug addict.

Buy avenues fly trap and bring it to the school. Thy will genetically enchance it so that it is 14 times it's size. Put Dylan in a bug costume, telling him it's for Halloween, and lock him in a room with it. No clean up necessary.

Convince him that you're testing his strength to identify sodas, and blindfold him. Then after a few drinks, give him wet quick-dry cement. Watch as his internal organs freeze and dry up.

Put a bomb in his birthday cake. Have him put out the candles, then jump on him so that his face gets smushed in. Gazzy will then activate the bomb, so that he explodes and you are a safe distance away but close enough to get splattered with cake.

While recovering from pulling his tonsils out ( does he even have tonsils?), feed him ice cream daily. Either give him death by brain-freeze, or put in finely grained glass so that he internally bleeds to death.

Cut off Dylan's foot, and tape his foot in their mouth. Cut off his fingers (all of them) and stick 2 of them in his nostrals. Then wait from him to choke to death.