Finding Bliss
Part 4
Ranma hopped on his foot, pulling the shoe off the other foot and placed it down. He exhaled. He had finished several martial art lessons at the Jakiang School of Martial Arts. He had taken up a part-time job now Nabiki was older. Kuno had started to go to cram school, determined to get his high school diploma so he would start working soon. It wasn't possible for him to go back to school fully. The school understood his predicament and agreed that he might sit in the exam to receive his degree.
He patted through the house, glancing in each room, searching for Kuno. He found him in the office, studying. "Hey, I'm home." He went over to Kuno's side and kissed his cheek. He grunted as Kuno grabbed him by the waist and pulled him down in his lap, giving him a proper kiss in return.
"Ah," Ranma said as he broke free from Kuno. "Miss me that much?" He teased.
Kuno smirked. "It's been real quiet in the house today with you at the dojo and Nabiki over at the Tendo."
Ranma turned and straddled Kuno, resting his forehead on the older man's head. "You needed time to study. So, when is the exam?"
"In a couple of weeks." Kuno rested his arms around Ranma's waist. "I don't know if I will pass."
Ranma scoffed. "Kuno, you were sempai when we were in school. You had good grades and did have the smarts when you were not sprouting off those nonsenses."
Kuno looked affronted. "They were from classic poetry and stories. Shakespeare, Tennyson, you name it."
"See my point?" Ranma deadpanned. He laughed as Kuno whipped out the infamous red rose out of nowhere. "Oh, come on! That's so corny."
Kuno brought the steam of the flower to his lips and bit on it. He leaned in and kissed Ranma, putting the rose right into his mouth. "But you find it amusing."
Ranma pulled back, rolling his eyes as he took the rose out of his mouth. "I am going to wash up before dinner. Are we going to order in?"
"It would be a good idea. I got a little more to study. Nabiki should be home…" Kuno glanced around Ranma to look at the clock on his desk. "Couple of hours."
"Sound good. Let's order from Yakisoba place. They got some good Korean BBQ too."
"All right, go on and wash up." Kuno shifted, allowing Ranma slipped off his lap and walked out of the office. He went back to studying.
The door opened, and Kuno looked at the clock to see it had only been ten minutes since Ranma had left.
"There's no hot water," Ranma said as she walked into Kuno's office with a scowl on her face. She crossed her arms, unaware she had pushed her ample breasts upward. And they were naked.
Kuno looked up from his paper, and his eyes widened, seeing her standing there only in boxers and towel draped around her neck. "You usually do that?" He gestured to her. He swallowed, feeling his pants tightened. The young Kuno from high school inside him was jumping with joy.
Ranma glanced down. "Eeeps. I need to stop doing that, just walking around and not thinking about covering up." She looked up to see Kuno appearing strained.
"No hot water, you say?" Kuno asked. "Might be the boiler, I should check." He shifted his pants before standing up. It did not go unnoticed by Ranma.
She saw the tent in his trouser and smirked. "Nabiki's still with Kasumi for another couple of hours… maybe we should have a detour to the bedroom on the way to the basement?"
Kuno saw the vixen grin on Ranma's face and watched as she slid the towel off and pushed her boxer shorts down over her curvaceous hips to drop to the floor. "Forget the bedroom." He grabbed her and pushed her down on his desk. "I'll have you right here." He fumbled with his pants while Ranma laughed.
"Come here, you." She said as she pulled him down and kissed him hard.
"What are you doing?" Ranma asked as he entered the living room with a bowl of cereal and eating. Kuno was sitting with Nabiki at the table, but writing on some forms while Nabiki ate her breakfast.
Nabiki squealed and cried, "Mommy!"
"Nabiki-chan." Ranma moved to sit beside his daughter, noting that she had finished her breakfast and was messy. He put the bowl down and started to clean her up. "Kuno… what are you doing? Nabiki's long finished with her breakfast."
Kuno looked up. "I'm filling out this form for her school."
"What?" Ranma asked as he let Nabiki down on the mat to play with her toys. "She's barely two, and you're already planning her school? We don't need to worry about that for a while."
Kuno shook his head. "This school, it's a private school, and you need to register her in early as possible. The earliest, the better chance. The best chance would be at three-months pregnancy. But in our case, we've wasted so much time."
Ranma stared blankly at Kuno. "What school is this and when did we discuss her schooling?"
Kuno placed his pen down. "I went to this school when I was young. It's the best, and I want the best for Nabiki. I had it all down when I was younger, my future planned out."
Ranma felt as if he was jabbed and sighed and leaned on his fist. "And yet, you ended up in a public high school. What's up with that?"
"My father was the principal. Furinkan High School, as you knew it, had the best kendo team in Nermia."
Rolling his eyes, Ranma glanced to Nabiki. "She will do fine in a public school. Private school is a waste."
Kuno frowned. "Nabiki will go to this school, that's final."
"No." Ranma shot back quietly. He turned to Kuno and glared. "You said it yourself; we've wasted enough time to enroll her. We were on a fucking island! We didn't even plan for her!"
Nabiki blinked, staring at her mother, surprised by the outburst. "Mommy?"
Ranma closed his eyes and sighed. "I am sorry, Nabiki." He turned to her and tickled her, causing her to squeal and giggle, forgetting about the outburst and went back to playing.
He turned back to Kuno. "I am sorry that we couldn't plan her future out the minute we found out I was pregnant." His voice dripped with sarcasm. He got up and took the bowl of cereal. "I'm sorry that your future didn't turn out as you planned. Maybe you would be better off without me being here." He left the living room, leaving with the last statement, "I'm not the wife you wanted."
Kuno glanced down to the form on the table. He grasped the paper and clenched his hand into a fist, the paper crinkled into a ball. Ranma was right; it was pointless. It didn't matter where Nabiki went to school; her education would be the same. You can't plan your future and expect it to go the way you wanted it.
He looked over to his daughter, who was rolling on her back, playing with a ball. A small smile formed on his lips, he loved Nabiki-chan so much that he would give anything up in the world for her. She was his everything. So was Ranma.
He picked her up and carried her to his room and placed her down in the box beside his bed. He gave her a bottle and watched her as she drank and fell asleep. He then got up and searched for Ranma.
He found Ranma in the dojo, going through katas. He waited as Ranma finished the set and stepped into the dojo. Ranma had turned to him with a blank face.
Kuno could see that Ranma was angry with him. It was beneath the surface. As well hurt too. He stopped before the shorter man and stood there. "I am sorry." Ranma crossed his arms, glaring at him. "I should've talked to you about Nabiki's future, included you."
Ranma shook his head. "That wasn't the issue. You made it sound like you regret being with me."
Kuno's eyes widened, and he grasped the unresisting Ranma, pulling him into a hug. He buried his nose in his hair. "No. No, I did not mean to make you feel that way. You were right; I can't always expect the future to turn out the way I want it. I've learned that the best things come unexpectedly. You and Nabiki are everything to me."
Ranma lifted his arms and returned the hug, burrowing into the strong arms, finding comfort. "I understand. I just… it's everything."
"I know. Ranma…" Kuno pushed him away slightly to see his face. "You're unsure about us."
Ranma looked up to Kuno. He couldn't deny that. Indeed, he was still struggling to understand his role in the relationship.
Kuno understood. It was fairly easy for him to accept the reality of his sexuality, all he had to do was to look in his own heart and see the truth. Of everyone, he had gotten what he wanted; he got the "pigtailed girl" in the end. But Ranma? With the demand of becoming a man and traditional honor deeply integrated into him since at young age and being forced to do what the people around him say he should do, he was confused. Switching genders with a splash of water didn't help any.
"I'll wait for you, for as long it takes," Kuno said, kissing his forehead and leaving Ranma to himself in the dojo.
Ranma fell to his knees, shaking. The table has turned. Now he was at fault, hurting Kuno. He bowed over, placing his head on his knees, hugging them with his arms tightly. He fought the racking shakes that ran through his body. A dry sob choked him.
He remained there for a long time.
Kuno came back much later. The sun had long gone down, and Nabiki had been put to bed. He found Ranma sitting cross-legged in the middle of the dojo.
He went to Ranma and knelt beside him. He reached out, touching Ranma's shoulder and he jerked. "Ranma?" Ranma turned to Kuno, the depth of sadness was in his eyes, making him recoil. "Oh, Ranma."
"I…" Ranma started, his voice cracked, and he couldn't find words.
"You are lost." Kuno supplied. "You were right earlier, about Nabiki's school. It didn't matter. I didn't mean to make you feel bad."
Ranma bowed his head. "I shouldn't be feeling confused anymore. I know who I am, I know what my feelings are. But, there are times I doubt myself."
Kuno grasped Ranma around the shoulder, pulling him close. "I feel the same way too sometimes. All I have to do is to look at you and Nabiki, and I find myself again, my reasons to live."
Ranma looked up to Kuno. "Why is it that you keep understanding me? Knowing exactly what to say?"
Kuno gave a wry laugh. "That's because I love you and we've gone through enough shit to kill us thousands of times over. No one else would ever have lived what we had gone through. The island gave us a special kind of bliss."
Ranma rested his head on Kuno's shoulder, feeling the tension fade from his body. He grasped Kuno's hand and held it. "Yeah. Coming back to Japan… it's as if we had to find it again."
"We are finding bliss. But we have to go through trials of errors to find it again."
Ranma smiled. "Finding Bliss. Yeah."
"Where are we now?"
Ranma looked up in surprise. He never thought he would hear the voice ever again. He saw Ryoga standing at the entrance of the restaurant they were in. He wasn't alone, Akari was with him. Oh, that's right... they married a while back.
"Silly, Ryoga, we're here to eat lunch before we head back home. Come on, let's find a table." Akari tugged onto Ryoga's arm, leading him toward a table.
Then, Ryoga saw Ranma. He paled for a moment, speechless before he asked, "Ranma?"
Ranma stood up and approached the Lost Boy. "Ryoga, Akari." He bowed in greeting. "It's good to see you."
"Likewise. I heard you were alive..." Ryoga started, and they went to Ranma's table and sat down. A waitress came by and gave them cups with tea, leaving the menu.
Akari smiled. "I am happy to see you looking well. What happened?"
Ranma shrugged. "It's a long story; I'd rather not get into it."
Ryoga nodded. "The news said you and someone were on an island for two years. Without memories?" Ranma nodded. "And they found you and the other person driving on a raft, nearly dead."
Akari tapped her cheek, "I remember there was a mention of a baby?"
Smirking, "Yes. My baby."
Ryoga frowned. "With who? What about Akane?"
"No. When I say my baby, as in, I got pregnant and gave birth to her. It's a girl."
Ryoga sat there in silence, allowing it to sink. Akari gave the waitress their orders.
"I see." Ryoga finally said after a few minutes. "Well, I am glad you look good."
Ranma stared at his old friend. He could see the weariness in his eyes, the harsh line of hard life in his face. He had several visible scars and recalled how Ryoga walked with slight limp. "I am sorry." He swallowed and clenched his hands on the table. "There has not been a day that went by that I wished it didn't happen. The whole..." he couldn't bring himself to say it.
Ryoga reached out and grasped Ranma's tightened fist, patting in comfort. "I know. It's in the past."
Ranma shook his head and sighed, withdrawing from the table to lean back on the chair. "It might be in the past, but I still relive it when I close my eyes. If it weren't for Akane when I regained my memories, I would have succeeded in killing my self. If it weren't for Tate and Nabiki, I would not have been able to live with myself either."
"Tate?" Ryoga asked, unfamiliar with the name. "And Nabiki? What about Akane?"
Ranma realized his mistake and laughed. "Ah, Tate as in Tatewaki Kuno. Nabiki is our daughter."
Ryoga frowned, it didn't take him very long to make the connection. "You're saying, you and Kuno?" He saw Ranma nod. "Even now?" Another nod. "You insult Akane." He jumped up, gripping Ranma at the collar. Akari gasped and grasped Ryoga's arm, pleading him to calm down. "How dare you? That's an abomination!"
Ranma stared back at Ryoga impassively. He remained calm and replied evenly, "It is no one's business with who I am with. Kuno and I survived on the island with no memories of who we were. I was a girl the entire time. What we did was natural. Our feelings..." he felt his collar being let go and straightened the wrinkle out.
Ryoga sat back down, glaring at his oldest friend.
Ranma shook his head. "Ryoga. I am happy you are doing good. I heard about you and Akari, congratulation to both of you." He stood up and bowed, turning to leave.
Deflated, Ryoga called out, "Ranma, please. Sit." He gestured to the chair. Ranma turned back and sat down. "You're right; it's not my business to who you are with now. It's just strange, our whole life, you were always trying to be the better man. I see it now; you are the better man now."
Ranma nodded. "Thanks." He glanced up and waved to Kuno who had entered with Nabiki on his hip. They came over and sat down next to Ranma.
Ryoga stared at Kuno, remembering the man from their past. He could see the same change he saw in Ranma in Kuno as well. He had sensed it and knew they were not the same people he once knew. His eyes shifted to the little girl on his lap, smiling and waving at Ranma, asking for her mother.
Ranma took the girl and nuzzled the girl, causing her to squeal with laughter. Ryoga watched wistfully as Ranma interacted with his daughter. It was a sight to see.
"She's beautiful," Ryoga said softly.
"Thanks."
"Kuno." Ryoga turned to the older man.
"Hibiki. It's good to see you again. Congrats, you and Akari." Kuno nodded to the woman beside Ryoga.
The waitress came back with a couple of bowls for Ryoga and Akari. Ranma ordered two more and a small child-sized bowl of applesauce for Nabiki.
Ranma turned back to Ryoga. "As for Akane... I ended things with her when I came back. We all no longer who we were. It would not have worked out. I saved her and myself grief. I haven't seen her since I left. She was angry with me."
Ryoga scoffed. "I can see why." He laid the soup ladle down and shook his head. "But yeah, I can understand what you mean. I also loved Akane too, but it would not have worked for us either." He turned to Akari and grasped her hand in affection. "Akari is a better woman for me."
"Yeah." Ranma grinned, he started to feed Nabiki the applesauce, careful not to let her make a mess. "Any prospect of having kids yourselves?"
Akari blushed. "That's why we came to town. We just finished our appointment with Dr. Tofu." She glanced to Ryoga and saw him nod. "We're expecting twins by the end of the year!"
Ranma's eyes widened. "Twins! Oh wow! Congratulation!"
Kuno smiled, "Double the fun. Congratulations."
Ryoga blushed, "Thanks. It was surprising. But we're excited. I hope neither of our children will have my sense of direction. That would be bad."
Ranma laughed. "I don't think so. You'll be a good father."
Ryoga stilled his eating, gazing at Ranma as he gave Nabiki attention, cleaning her before handing her back to Kuno who had a bottle of milk from the bag he had with him. Together, they moved in harmony, adjusting Nabiki to lie comfortably in Kuno's arm and drank from her bottle. Ranma brushed her curly black hair before settling back in his chair, but not without brushing an affectionate touch across Kuno's arm.
Ryoga saw it all. He saw the fleeting look of affection in Ranma's eyes and a gentle one in Kuno's. They looked at ease with each other as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
He smiled to himself and started to eat again.
"How old is she?" Akari asked, watching the child in Kuno's arms falling asleep.
Kuno replied, "She'll turn two in few weeks."
Akari cooed, "Adorable! You two make a beautiful baby. I know it is strange to ask, but are you going to have another one?"
Ranma and Kuno glanced at each other. It was something that was on their mind but had not discussed it. Kuno, on his part, did not want to put Ranma through that again. It had been difficult on the island. At the time, they had to accept and live with it. But now, they had the leisure to plan and consider it, but it was Ranma that has to make a choice.
Ranma glanced at Nabiki. "I don't know. We haven't talked about it yet. She was... an accident. We weren't thinking then."
Ryoga asked, "You consented?"
Ranma gave him a deadpan look. Ryoga held up his hands in surrender. "No memories, remember?" He smirked. "Yeah, everything we did was in our full consent. As for Nabiki having a sibling, maybe. We'd have to think about that."
Akari smiled. "I understand. If you do, I am sure he or she will be beautiful as Nabiki-Chan."
"Why Nabiki?"
Kuno laughed, careful to not wake the sleeping baby in his arms. "It was the only name that came to my mind at the time. We had nothing to go on for names." He glanced at Ranma and shrugged. "We decided to keep it as it is when we remembered."
Ranma buried his face in his palm. "Nabiki-Chan's first word was 'yen.' It was Auntie Nabiki's fault."
Akari and Ryoga laughed.
They are the rest of their lunch and caught each other up in the rest of their news.
Just before they parted in the street, Ryoga tugged onto Ranma's arm. "Call Akane. Settle things for both of your sakes."
Ranma blinked before he nodded. "You're right. I should. Thanks!"
Ryoga smiled as he watched Ranma and Kuno walk away.
Ranma stared at the phone in his hand. He was nervous.
It was not that often he would find himself nervous. He laughed to himself, back when he was young, he ran into things headfirst without thinking.
That wasn't the case anymore. They grew up, and now, things are always carefully thought out.
But this is something he hasn't thought it out. He has no idea what would come out of it. It had not ended well that night when he ended it with Akane. He had not wanted to lose her, at least as a friend. It had hurt that she reacted that way. The whole meeting at the Tendo also had ended in a fiasco. He still didn't have a good ending with Akane then either.
He punched the number and held the phone to his ear, waiting.
*Tendo Akane here.*
"Akane. It's me."
*Oh.* The reply was sullen.
"I'd like to talk with you."
*I don't need to talk to you. You made it clear with your choices.*
"Akane, please don't be stubborn," Ranma said, frustrated. "I want us to be friends; we can't just let things off like that and live the rest of our lives with the negativity."
There was a silence over the phone. Ranma could hear her breathing softly. Then finally, *Alright, talk.*
Ranma found himself at a loss for words, "Uh. Maybe we should meet up and talk face to face?"
*Fine. Let's meet at the fountain in town tomorrow.*
"Thank you, Akane."
*Yeah, goodbye.* Then the phone went dead. Ranma dropped his head and placed the receiver back down.
Kuno slid up behind him and wrapped his arms around Ranma's waist, resting his head on the shorter man's shoulder. "Not good?"
"I don't know. We agree to meet tomorrow." Ranma said as he turned in Kuno's arms, returning the hug. "I couldn't find words to start."
"Maybe you will tomorrow."
"Yeah."
The next day, Ranma went to the fountain in the park. He recalled the crazy time when he tried to expose Ryoga to Akane that he was P-Chan. There were many other times. He could see the scar that he and his friends had done to the fountain.
Akane was sitting on the edge, looking into the water. She looked different, in jeans and simple but classy sweater. She looked grown up and beautiful. But he didn't feel anything beyond friendly love for her.
Ranma approached her, "Hey."
Akane turned and stood up, replying. "Hey."
Ranma gestured to the path through the park. "Wanna walk?" She nodded, and they started to walk together.
"I saw Ryoga the other day." Ranma started. "He looked good, happy with Akari."
"Yeah. Akari is good to him." Akane replied.
"He told me to talk to you."
"Oh."
Ranma watched Akane from the corner of his eyes as they walked together. He could see emotions going through her eyes. "Akane…"
She sighed and stopped, turning to him. "Ranma. I had time to think about it. I… I loved you for a long time. I am not sure when I started to fall in love with you… it might have started when you went into Neko-ken for the first time and kissed me then. I know we weren't exactly the best fiancees to each other, but I did love you, cared for you deeply." She sniffled.
Ranma bowed his head. "I did love you too, even though we were always fighting." He looked up. "But if you put this in consideration, we never had time to be ourselves, never got the chance to develop our feeling further. By the time we went on that… stupid trip…" Ranma looked away. He couldn't bring himself to talk about the incident. "What I felt for you barely scratched the surface. Then I lost it all."
Akane nodded. "And you and Kuno developed something that was stronger." She wrung her hands together. "I admit, I am jealous of him. I wanted what he had from you. It should've been me. It should've been you, and I lost on that island…"
Ranma moved to lean against the fence that lined the sidewalk, separating the path from the lake. He looked to the water. He remembered the time Akane and Ryoga went on a date and how he tried to interfere it. He smirked at the memory. "Remember that time, you and Ryoga went on a date?"
Akane moved to rest her arms on the fence. "Yeah." She smiled at the memory. "Oh goodness, you were terrible. Interfering the date, pretending to be Ryoga's fiancée. You did convince him that you love him."
Ranma laughed. "Yeah. That was stupid of me."
"You were jealous, weren't you?" Akane asked.
He was surprised. "Yeah." His smile faded. "All those times. I've always interfered, and you have too. We were too stupid not to notice it."
Akane turned her head to Ranma. "Do you love Kuno?"
He looked to the sky. "I know it sounds strange. He's my soul."
Tears spilled down her cheeks, and she hastily wiped them away. "It's hard for me to accept that. Kasumi and Nabiki made sure I understood that even if we did get together when you came back, that we would have been miserable. But I want to hear it from you."
Ranma turned to her and grasped her hand, holding it. He looked into her eyes and said, "Akane… we would have been miserable with each other. You would not be able to help me through my nightmares, my insecurity, and doubts. You never accepted my female side…" He held a finger up as she started to protest. "Akane, you made it clear by calling me a pervert, sexist and all those names. You saw her as a different person. Even you admitted that you were jealous of her and afraid of her. Kuno didn't see that; he saw her and me as the same person."
He let go of her hand and ran his fingers through his hair, trying to hide the shakiness that suddenly took over his hands. "Kuno and I, we faced things unimaginable on that island. We fought for our very own lives and to survive. He was all I had for a long time. We were ready to die on that raft the day we were found. We ran out of water and food."
Akane swallowed. "You're right; I would not have understood or been able to help you through that." She wrapped her arms around Ranma's arm and rested her head on his shoulder. "I still can't get past that Kuno has changed. He has been a thorn in my side for a long time. I just can't see him beyond the stupid 'Blue Thunder of Furinkan High.'" They laughed together.
"The Blue Thunder do appear from time to time, but he's not so insufferable as he was. He grew up. He is… not the same man."
Akane looked up at him and asked, "Tell me about him."
Ranma smiled, and they started to walk again. "Tate is a great dad; he adores Nabiki-chan. He is good to me…"
Together they walked through the park, Ranma telling Akane of Kuno and Akane talked about what she had been up to in the past few years.
Note:
I thought the story will end with an epilogue in the next chapter, but I was wrong. It will be few more chapters.
I am a bit muddled with the age of Nabiki so I am just guessing her age here. But one thing for sure, she's a toddler now.
Thank you for reading! More to come soon!
