AN: Sorry for taking so long for the update! I'm still in the middle of exams so this is a really short one shot set a few weeks after Itachi joined Kakashi and Tenzo's ANBU team. My last exam is soon so I should hopefully have a nice long one shot sometime after that.
Drunken Adventures
The mission had been particularly taxing, leaving the three members of Team Kakashi worn out and yawning as they made their way from the Hokage's office and into the quieting village. When Kakashi offered to take the three out for a meal instead of asking Tenzo to make it, no one protested and instead the three trooped to a cheap but cheerful bar that, according to Kakashi, did excellent food. It was slightly out of the way so as the three braced themselves against the cold of the evening, all three well aware that winter was on its way. Konoha was beautiful at this time of year; the leaves had faded from a green to a fiery red, which in a way was a reflection of the villages Will of Fire. The trees would always bloom again, after hibernating for the winter. Something which all three ninja wished they could do, if only for a while.
Itachi, the youngest of the three, was dragging his feet, eyes drooping as they trudged through the fallen leaves. Tenzo raised an eyebrow at the kid and nudged Kakashi, who in turn smiled beneath his mask, eye creasing as he watched Itachi yawn. Kakashi took pity on the sleepy Uchiha and pulled him onto his back, ignoring the small noise of protest the ten year old muttered. Tenzo stifled a laugh at the sight of the two of them and Itachi kicked out his leg, landing a hit on Tenzo's sore side.
Tenzo groaned, placing a hand on his injured side and keeling over, glaring as Itachi gave him a smug look from his comfortable position on Kakashi's back. Kakashi smiled again, shifting Itachi on his back so that the kid's right knee didn't dig into his possibly broken lowest rib quite so much.
"Captain you can put me down, I'm not a child." Itachi muttered, not seeming entirely convinced that he wanted down, especially as his arms wrapped around Kakashi's neck in a choke hold, causing the older ninja to choke and tug them off his now bruised jugular. Itachi's hand moved to grip Kakashi's ANBU flak jacket instead, struggling to keep his eyes open as he rested his chin on Kakashi's padded shoulder.
"Do you think we'll have a few days off after this?" Tenzo pondered aloud, rubbing the back of his neck, half convinced that he'd given himself whiplash.
"Let's hope, I don't think the kid can deal." Kakashi replied, turning his head to glance at the now snoozing boy.
"Kid has a name Captain…" Itachi murmured, peeling his eyes open with some difficulty.
"Captain has a name kid." Kakashi chided back at him, grinning over at Tenzo who rolled his eyes.
"Senpai, you're bickering with a child."
"Not a child." Itachi mumbled, kicking his foot out at Tenzo again. Tenzo managed to see it coming and jumped out of the way, straight into a tree.
Tenzo winced and Kakashi chuckled. "Looks like you're back in your natural habitat Tenzo, too bad they rejected you, again."
"Does he normally walk into trees?" Itachi asked, raising his head off of Kakashi's shoulder to glance at the brown haired man who was rubbing his nose.
"Yes." Kakashi replied at the same time Tenzo said the opposite.
Itachi's brow furrowed in confusion, his sleepy mind making an attempt to determine the liar of the two.
"Don't worry kid, you're a part of our team now, you'll get used to Tenzo's idiocy." Kakashi told him, still smiling.
"My idiocy Senpai? You must be mistaken. I think you've forgotten what happened when a rather large snake poisoned you and I had to both carry you to safety and give you the antidote." Tenzo said, folding his arms against his chest.
"You're forgetting that you got eaten by said snake and had to be rescued by me." Kakashi retorted.
"Tenzo got eaten by a snake?" Itachi asked, looking interested to hear the story.
"Yes, it was pretty funny, he actually tried to kill m—"
"That was a classified mission senpai, shut up." Tenzo muttered, cheeks turning a vibrant pink.
Kakashi laughed, the sound causing a young couple to turn and giggle at the sight of the three ANBU. The bar loomed ahead and Kakashi dropped Itachi, expecting the boy to land on his feet. The sudden increase in gravity surprised Itachi and he fell to the ground, landing very ungracefully on his behind with a groan. Kakashi turned with a raised eyebrow as Tenzo snorted, laughing as he clutched his sore side.
"Whoops, sorry kid, didn't realise you were that out of it." Kakashi apologised, sounding entirely too amused to be sincere.
"I'm fine Captain." Itachi muttered, struggling to his feet and brushing himself off.
The bar in front of them was brightly lit, the sign battered and faded but the smells that emerged caused all three stomachs to rumble as they followed the glorious food smells into the cozy bar. The bar was warm when they walked in, causing the three ANBU to shed their cloaks and choose a booth near the back as a pretty barmaid took their orders.
The food arrived quickly and despite the short waiting time, Tenzo was ready to eat the wooden table at which they sat. Kakashi had to stop himself from making a snide remark as the barmaid returned with three large plates of steaming food. Tenzo Immediately dug in, stuffing his face with the flavoursome food until he closely resembled a chipmunk.
Itachi, the most refined of the group, ate delicately, raising an eyebrow at the hamster opposite him as the older teen continued scooping food into his mouth. Kakashi showed no sign of reaching for his food and yet at Itachi watched food continued to vanish from his plate and he chewed thoughtfully, mask unsoiled by the food he was eating. Itachi became fascinated with attempting to figure out how exactly his captain managed to get food from his plate to his mouth with such speed that his mask appeared undisturbed. Tenzo noticed Itachi's fascination and mouthed 'I don't know either' in Itachi's direction with a shrug.
"Do you two want drinks?" Kakashi asked, as he swallowed his last mouthful.
"Are you paying?" Tenzo replied, leaning back in his chair.
"Well, I was hoping you would Tenzo."
"Actually I thought that the senior of the group was meant to pay for the meal." Tenzo said, raising an eyebrow.
"Between us Tenzo, I don't believe there is a senior, I regard you as my equal in every respect." Kakashi smiled, visible eye crinkling.
Tenzo looked suspicious for a second before his features softened and he looked extremely proud. "In that case senpai, of course I'll pay, but only this once."
"Of course Tenzo, thank you." Kakashi replied smoothly, eye glinting as he glanced at Itachi, who was slightly dumbfounded at how gullible Tenzo was.
"Itachi would you like a drink?" Kakashi asked.
"Just water please Captain."
"Tenzo?"
"Alcohol."
"No." Kakashi replied bluntly, raising a hand to attract the barmaid's attention. He was spotted quickly and the girl made her way over swiftly, lifting the plates and asking what else they wanted.
"Two waters and sake please." Kakashi requested. The girl looked dubious for a second as if trying to determine Kakashi's age before nodding and vanishing with their plates.
As it turned out, he should never have been allowed to order the alcohol. The sake was strong and soon he wasn't looking sober in the slightest.
"Come on Kakashi, just a little?" Tenzo pleaded, sipping his wateras he used what he assumed could be called 'puppy dog eyes' on the older ninja who simply snorted and took another drink of sake, cheeks turning flush as he swallowed the drink.
"No way in hell Tenzo, you're definitely the definition of lightweight," Kakashi told him, downing his sake quickly as he raised his hand to get another refill of his drink. "Besides, you're underage, just wait a few years."
Tenzo made a noise of annoyance and bent over his cup, drinking the remainder of his water in a few seconds. Itachi simply raised an eyebrow at his desperate teammate before setting his glass down and leaning back, sighing as he curled his feet under him, sleep threatening to take over as he watched the barmaid bring over some more sake.
Kakashi threw his next drink back in a single gulp, pushing his glass back and ordering even more sake, much to the disbelief of the barmaid, who looked sick of running back and forth to their table. Tenzo ordered more water, jealous of Kakashi's age and ability to drink.
It didn't take long for Kakashi to become tipsy, the skin under his mask becoming flushed and his words becoming sloppy.
"Sooo, Kakashi, what about that drink?" Tenzo asked, a smug smile appearing on his face.
"I was getting you a drink?" Kakashi asked, eyes narrowing in confusion, his ration thinking having left a while before.
"Yep." Tenzo assured the confused man, watching as Kakashi raised a hand to order more drink. The waitress looked dubiously at Tenzo before handing Kakashi the extra sake cup and leaving the bottle on the table, evidently giving up running to and fro.
Tenzo grabbed the bottle and filled his glass and Kakashi's, grinning at Itachi who rolled his sleepy eyes at the overeager teenager. Before Kakashi would have the chance to realise that he was making a grave mistake, Tenzo decided to down the glass in one go. He soon realised his blunder as the liquid burned down his throat, the taste bitter and Tenzo choked, coughing as he scratched at his tongue.
"It's horrible!" Tenzo exclaimed, coughing some more. He grabbed Itachi's glass of water and downed it, trying to rid himself of the disgusting taste.
Itachi reached over the table and pried his glass from Tenzo's hands, washing the rim with his sleeve before refilling it and taking a sip. "Serves you right."
Tenzo hissed at Itachi, glaring at Kakashi as the white haired shinobi downed another glass without flinching. Itachi's gaze moved to the bottle of sake, now almost entirely empty then to Kakashi, whose cheeks were still flushed with drink. He was beginning to worry about the next morning and how hard it would be if Kakashi had a hangover or, as his father called it, the aftermath of a boxing match with a devil.
"Itachi," Kakashi began, pouring another drink of sake and pushing it towards Itachi. "You should have a drink too."
Itachi raised an eyebrow. "No thank you Captain."
"Aww, come on, live a little!" Kakashi slurred, raising his glass.
"No."
Tenzo laughed as Itachi obstinately refused to accept the drink, the boy's eyes narrowing at his superior. Kakashi stood up and lifted the cup, stretching over the table and causing Itachi to jump up onto the seat and Tenzo to leap to grab Kakashi around the waist pulling him away from the boy.
"No Captain you can't force Itachi to get drunk it doesn't work that way. Ten year olds should most definitely not be allowed alcohol." Tenzo told his drunk friend sternly before turning to the Uchiha and smiling encouragingly.
Kakashi looked confused, narrowing his eyes and staring at Tenzo for a few seconds. "Remember when you had long hair Tenzo? You looked even more like a girl than Itachi would with his hair down."
Tenzo turned bright red, causing Itachi to turn away, shoulders rising and falling as he struggled to stifle his laughter. Kakashi began to laugh too, causing Tenzo's cheeks to redden further. "We don't talk about that Kakashi."
"I'd love to hear more about it captain." Itachi voiced, wincing as Tenzo slammed his heel into his foot.
"If you dare senpai, I will tell him about the time when you—"
"shh," Kakashi slurred, putting a finger to Tenzo's lips and stunning him into silence. "We shouldn't talk about that, he might begin to suspect what happened between us."
"What happened between us—?" Tenzo muttered.
"Shh, we must keep it a secret." Kakashi slurred, causing Tenzo to give him a look of complete confusion. He looked to Itachi for help but the boy looked as confused as he was. "No one can know about the smoky clan." Kakashi muttered to himself, staring into his sake glass with intent.
"The smoky clan?" Itachi pressed, his earlier rush of adrenaline pushing his sleep away.
Tenzo put his head in his hands. "It was back when we were chasing Orochimaru for different reasons and again, it's classified, sorry Itachi."
It was shortly after that incident when things went to hell.
It started with Kakashi having a staring contest with his sake glass, sharingan activated and attention completely undivided, causing Itachi and Tenzo to glance at each other with worry. They'd both raised an eyebrow as he'd raised his forehead protector but neither had said a word, simply glad that he'd stopped talking nonsense.
The two barely had time to leap to the side as the sound of the birds filled the booth and Kakashi's chidori met the sake glass, causing the glass to shatter and the fragments to fly everywhere, embedding themselves in the table and seats of the booth. Both ninja paled, glancing at each other with wide eyes before leaping into action.
"No Kakashi no!" Tenzo shouted, tackling his captain to the ground, binding his hands with a quick jutsu. Kakashi began muttering about 'suspiciously evil sake glasses' as Tenzo stood up and bowed to the barkeeper, rubbing the back of his neck. "He'll pay for your sake glass and I'll fix your table in the morning. I'm so sorry for the disturbance."
The barkeeper blinked as Itachi helped Kakashi up, the white haired ninja looking extremely exhausted, his face drawn and hand stifling a yawn. "Sure… Just don't let him drink anymore."
"We'll try." Tenzo smiled awkwardly, supporting Kakashi's other side and the three of them left the bar quickly before Kakashi could cause any more trouble.
When Kakashi tried once more to disable a 'threatening' rubbish bin, his two teammates decided that it would be best to 'let Kakashi sleep', which involved a block of wood meeting Kakashi's head and a sneaky attack by Tenzo.
The two ANBU then hauled their captain back to his apartment, pulling off his shoes and dropping him onto his bed. It was an afterthought of Itachi's that left two extra strong painkillers and a glass of water on his bedside table before the two escaped, hoping to avoid Kakashi when he woke up with an incredible headache and a strange feeling of memory loss.
